Old Friends

'Here's a good one...

...Sarah McLachlan, 'Dirty Little Secret'

Severus left his house two days later for his meeting with the Malfoys. The sounds of twigs snapping and birds chirping merged with Severus' internal thoughts. He questioned himself during the hike through the forest about whether this was something he should be doing, or if he shouldn't just go back home and ignore the Malfoys in perpetuity. The idea that he could be walking into a trap also crossed his mind, though who Lucius could employ to be on his side in a fight escaped Severus. The few Death Eaters who had survived the Battle at Hogwarts were spending the rest of their lives in Azkaban. Severus liked to think he could hold his own in a fight with Lucius, Narcissa and Draco, but he still hated the idea of walking into a fight. He had spent too many years walking into uncertain situations.

Severus had opted to leave three hours early in order to do some shopping whilst in La Ville Secrète. He needed to purchase more ingredients to continue his potion-making and get settled in for the winter. He'd prefer to not have to make any more excursions until closer to spring, as the area was vulnerable to large amounts of snow.

Once he arrived at the clearing near the edge of town, Severus checked his surroundings for Muggles. He cast a Disillusionment Charm on himself to ensure he would not be spotted appearing out of thin air in the middle of Muggle Paris. He turned on the spot, disappearing into the suffocating blackness. Seconds later, he reappeared behind a large bush that was just yards away from the roundabout which encircled the Arc de Triomphe. The traffic was too heavy to cross the street, so Severus walked around, looking for the underground walkways that would take him beneath the roads and end at the Arc. Severus controlled his breathing and tried to keep the same pace as the Muggles, in order to avoid bumping into anyone. It was a bustling time of day in Paris. People were enjoying the weekend, shopping bags in hands, and chatting merrily. As he walked along, he was very glad he had cast the Disillusionment Charm, as he wouldn't have had the opportunity inside the tunnel.

Once he had made it into the inside of the Arc, Severus followed Lucius' instructions and tapped the carving of the hat on the wall three times. After the third tap, a silver door appeared, the colour blending in with the wall. Severus noticed it had no handle, so he pushed. As he walked into the alley, he was taken aback by its elegance. Every building seemed to be made of marble, giving it a very French feel. Witches and wizards bustled around, carrying packages and chatting, like their Muggle equivalents outside. Severus took in his surroundings for a few moments, attempting to see into the various shops nearby to see if they held anything he would need. Upon turning to his immediate left, Severus noticed a cart labelled 'Bienvenue' and assumed this must be where he could get information. He noticed a blonde witch sitting behind the counter, reading a magazine and tapping her long red fingernails on the table with a strumming beat. Walking up to the cart, he stood there, waiting to be acknowledged, but the woman continued to read her magazine, oblivious to the fact that she had been approached. Annoyed, Severus coughed slightly to announce his presence, causing the woman to startle.

'Oui?' asked the witch, looking up from her reading.

'Do you speak English?' Severus asked, not wishing to relay everything he needed in broken French.

'Yes, I spoke English. How I can helps you, ma'am?' asked the witch, looking proud of her abhorrent language skills. She giggled at him as well. 'You have never come to La Ville before. You used old door.'

Frowning at being called "ma'am", Severus inquired as to where an apothecary might be, along with clothing shops and Madam Rouge. He also asked what she meant by the 'old door'. He was given a map of the area, with each shop and street labelled and was ushered away with an 'Enjoy La Ville Secrète, ma'am!'

Turning on his heels, Severus strode away quickly, wishing to get started on his shopping. He had plenty to purchase and only a couple of hours in which to do so. Walking down the cobblestone streets, Severus couldn't help but be in awe of the marble buildings. La Ville was clearly not as old as Diagon Alley, but had its own special kind of charm. He stopped off first at Gringotts. Severus was surprised that Gringotts had branches in France as well as in England and several other countries in Europe. Although they all used the same currency, each country operated differently in the weight of each denomination. Inside the bank, Severus traded his English Galleons for French ones and found he preferred the simpler French system, which dictated that there were ten Knuts to a Sickle and five Sickles to a Galleon.

After leaving Gringotts, Severus walked a few minutes down the main road to find the Apothecary. He pulled a list of ingredients he needed from his pocket. He knew he would need to brew various medicinal potions to store at the house for long term and liked to keep a broad variety of ingredients on hand to brew almost anything he might need at a moment's notice. Severus realised that he should have anticipated a language barrier, once he met the shop owner. She was a portly older woman with a kind smile and was of the generation that hadn't felt the need to learn too much English. Between her broken English and Severus' broken French, they were able to communicate to some extent. The problem was, the names of a few of the ingredients he needed were not directly translated and were nearly impossible to communicate with broken language skills, appalling sketches and poorly acted charades.

When Severus left the shop two gruelling hours later, he was still missing powdered Elm bark and essence of lilac, but had surrendered to the idea of ordering those by owl. Laden down with so many bags, he transfigured his largest bag into a black attaché and placed all of the other bags into it, as it was very awkward to juggle so many parcels. Looking down at his watch, he realized he only had an hour left before he was due to meet with Lucius. Severus had wanted to be fit for new clothes...dress robes were not needed in his current situation...but that would have to wait. Referring to his map, he decided to peruse a book shop on the same road as Madam Rouge to pass the time. It only took him a few minutes to find the shop, which was relatively busy at that time of day. Severus worked his way to the back of the shop, where non-fiction was kept. He spent a few minutes looking through the historical section, before moving on to biographies. Much to his dismay, he saw a small display of his own biography set up to be purchased at the end of one of the rows. Glancing out of his peripheral vision to see if anyone had spotted him, Severus quickly ducked into an aisle next to the display, hoping he might be able to get rid of it. He cast a hasty Disillusionment Charm on himself and had just walked around the corner when he nearly ran into a woman walking his way. He sidestepped her by going back into the aisle and with sudden jolt of recognition, realised it was his inquisitive neighbour, Sara. It had taken him a moment to recognise her, as she was dressed much differently from the last time he saw her. He noticed her black strapless dress, which drew his eye to her porcelain skin, the emerald pendant that gleamed from her clavicle and her silver high heels that clicked on the wooden floor as she walked. Her long blonde hair was pulled back into an elegant twist.

She was looking up from side to side at each aisle's sign, apparently knowing what section she needed. He saw her look over at the display of Skeeter's books, but she didn't immediately recognize the face on the cover. Severus held his breath with the hope that she would pass it up completely and be unaware of what she saw. Within seconds, however, Severus saw the realization wash over her as she turned to face the display once more. The display was at the end of the aisle he was in, and he could see her expression as she stepped closer to the books, picking one up, a baffled expression on her face. She turned the book over and saw Rita Skeeter's face looking up at her. Severus watched as a woman who worked at the book shop approached Sara as she stood looking at the book.

'Bonjour, Sara. May I help you find a book?' the woman asked in English. She was shorter and stockier than Sara and clearly knew her.

Sara turned to look at her, book still in hand.

'What do you know about this man? Or this book, for that matter?' she asked, holding it up to the woman.

The woman laughed. 'Oh, that is Severus Snape. Surely you heard about him?'

Sara shook her head. 'Marie, you know I don't follow the news much. What makes him so extraordinary that he gets his own book?'

Marie looked nonplussed. 'I know it was in England, but it was still quite a story topic here in the last few months. Severus Snape helped to bring down Voldemort. He was a spy during the war with Voldemort and was the one who murdered Albus Dumbledore. Wasn't Dumbledore your neighbour?'

Sara's eyes widened, but she tried to hide her obvious surprise by attempting to look nonchalant.

'Yes, Albus was my neighbour. He was a dear man. Perhaps I'll buy this, just so I can catch up on what has been happening in the world around me. I tend to be a bit of a hermit,' she said, handing the book to the shop keeper.

Marie smiled, took the book and headed towards the front of the shop. Severus was impatient to escape the bookshop as Sara remained rooted to the spot, seemingly stunned by what she had learned. She stood at the display for a few moments longer, biting down on her glossy bottom lip. With a sigh, she walked back to the front of the shop, her original purchase long forgotten. Severus took this moment to leave the row he was in and head for the exit. He'd be better off just waiting at the inn. Walking away, he waved his wand at the display of his books, causing the display to disappear and the books to conveniently rest on top of the book cases, out of reach and completely out of sight. As he made for the door, he overheard Marie asking Sara why she was dressed up.

'My parents are in Paris for the day. They are travelling to Greece to visit friends and wanted to stop by to see me first. They begged me to have dinner with them. Well, my mother did. She made me feel guilty about living so far away and never coming home to visit, and God forbid something happens to them while they are travelling and I never get to see them again... I hate when she does that,' Sara said, rolling her eyes. 'And I had a specific reason for coming here, but got so distracted by this book that now I don't have time to look for what I needed. Perhaps you can just send it to me?' Severus listened to Sara talking about the book she needed while he waited for the exit to clear so he could leave unseen.

Severus repressed a chuckle as he walked out of the book shop. He and her cat would both be engaging in some schadenfreude over her dinner with her parents. She deserved to be interrogated to an annoying extent, as she had done to him. She already knew far more about him than he did about her. His feelings on this were mixed; while she might quit asking questions, anything she wished to know having been answered by the book, Severus knew he would still be embarrassed. She would know about the pathetic little boy he had been; all of the deep, dark, horrible things he'd done in the past; and most of all, she would know about Lily. He shuddered as he walked down the street. He didn't want this bloody American knowing about his love for Lily and how he had lost her due to his own stupidity. He would not be surprised if she used what she learned in the book to complete the psychological profile of him she seemed to be working on and probably spread the word to the other neighbours. Severus suddenly felt more vulnerable than he ever had, even during the war. He shook his head and put the thoughts of his neighbour aside as he came upon Madam Rouge. It was a marble building, with flowering bushes planted in pots outside of it. A balding man stood by the door, looking around. Severus ducked into a small alley and removed the Disillusionment Charm before walking back out onto the street and over to the inn.

'Bon soir, Monsieur,' the man said, opening the door for Severus.

Severus gave him a curt nod and walked inside. He was surprised by how elegant the 'inn' was, as he had been expecting something more rustic. He found the lobby slightly sickening, as it was decorated in deep red and gold, resembling the Gryffindor common room, but the plush carpet felt like clouds under his feet. Unsure of where he was supposed to go, Severus walked up to a desk against the opposite wall, where a brunette wearing crimson robes with the letters M.R. stitched in golden letters on the lapel was seated looking at a large book. She looked up once he approached, recognition immediately crossing her face.

'You are Severus Snape, no?' she asked, standing up.

'Yes. I have plans to meet the Malfoys for dinner here at half-past six,' Severus said, trying to ignore the girl's delight at being correct.

'Yes, Monsieur Malfoy informed us that he would have a Monsieur Snape joining him and Madam Malfoy. Please, follow me,' she said, walking around the desk and gesturing towards a hall to the right. Severus followed her into a large dining room, whose elegance was also surprising. It was filled with several round tables covered with white cloths. Crystal glassware gleamed from each table, and a bewitched orchestra of violins, cellos and basses serenaded the guests as they dined. Every table seemed to be full. Severus shook his head, unsure of why he had presumed this would be more like the Leaky Cauldron when Lucius referred to it as an inn. For the Malfoys, these were modest accommodations, and naturally they would think it quaint and simple. Severus followed the witch through the room to the very back corner, where two people were sitting at a smaller round table. Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy were looking better than when Severus had seen them at the Battle of Hogwarts, but something was missing from their looks prior to Voldemort's return. Perhaps it was less arrogance.

'Severus! So glad you could join us,' Narcissa cried, standing when she saw him. She took both of his hands and kissed his cheeks. Severus noticed her that her silver dress was made of silk, as her long sleeves had brushed his skin as she grabbed his hands.

Severus attempted a kind expression. 'Narcissa, you are looking beautiful, as always.'

Narcissa brushed away his compliment away with a wave of her hand as Lucius approached Severus and stretched out a hand.

'Severus, thank you for coming.' Lucius' voice and manner were much different than a few years ago. He seemed genuine and almost contrite.

The three of them sat down at the table, and a waitress poured them each a glass of red wine. Severus could feel the tension in the air once the waitress left. Their nervousness was evident, as Narcissa fidgeted with her napkin and the hand that held her glass trembled slightly. Lucius was avoiding eye contact, but taking several large gulps of wine whilst examining a point over Narcissa's shoulder. Their uneasiness made Severus feel empowered. He sipped his wine casually before speaking.

'I am surprised Draco isn't here. I was looking forward to seeing him as well,' Severus said, watching his former friends look relieved that he broken the awkward silence. Their relief, however, was short-lived.

'Ah, yes,' Lucius began, looking both uncomfortable and sad. 'Draco hasn't been well. That's why we are in Paris.'

Severus' eyebrows furrowed. He hadn't seen Draco since the battle, but knew he had made it out unscathed.

'What is wrong with him? I don't recall him being wounded in the battle,' Severus asked, concerned. He did like Draco. Draco had been born into a situation which gave him little choice in whether he hated Muggles and Muggle-borns. Had he been in a different family, Draco could have been a pleasant young man.

A sniff came from Narcissa, who was dabbing her eyes with a lace handkerchief.

'Oh, Severus,' she began, fighting back sobs. 'Draco has had a bit of a breakdown since the battle. He's...he can't...' Narcissa's words were lost in quiet sobs.

Lucius picked up where Narcissa had left off, his own voice strained with emotion.

'After the post-battle shock wore off, Draco became very depressed. He wouldn't eat and would sleep all day. He had these bouts of anger over insignificant things or would start to cry over nothing at all. It got increasingly worse as time went on. When we were cleared by the Ministry, I thought he would get better. But he didn't.' Lucius looked to be on the verge of tears, and Severus realised that the severity of Draco's psychological state must be critical.

After taking a moment to compose himself, Lucius continued in a hoarse voice. 'The day after we received the news, Draco tried to cut his Dark mark out of his arm. He cut so deep, the bone was exposed. He had removed the skin, muscle and everything in between. He came out of his bedroom and walked into the parlour and showed us. He was holding the Mark and the flesh it was on in his other hand. He was emotionless, as though he weren't in pain and bleeding everywhere. He showed it to me and said "He can't control me anymore, Father." We summoned a Mediwizard to the house, who was able to get him stabilised enough to go to St. Mungo's, where they were able to put him right as best they could. He will need to do some exercises to make his arm work normally. But that's not the reason we are in Paris. Draco needs help dealing with the emotional weight of everything that happened over the last few years, and we felt he might be too vulnerable at the closed ward in St. Mungo's. He's actually at a Muggle hospital, here in Paris, where he can get help and be watched around the clock.'

Severus felt detached from his body. Draco was just a boy who had been put into a terrible situation. And now he was locked away in a closed ward, losing his mind. Severus recalled the day that Draco was born. Lucius had sent an owl with the news, his excitement contagious, even through written word. In the letter, he wrote that he and Narcissa wanted Severus as Draco's godfather, as they were confident that should something happen to them, Severus would raise their son with 'a proper perspective on life', meaning a pureblood fanaticism. At the time, Severus had felt honoured that his friend and one of Voldemort's inner circle of followers would entrust him with such a task, but the memory made him ill in the present day. Pushing those thoughts aside, he tried to focus on more logical aspects of the situation, such as the Malfoys' decision to commit their child to a Muggle institution.

'Why did you choose to put him in a Muggle hospital, rather than the wizarding hospital? And how are you ensuring that Draco's magical powers are under control and not exposed to the Muggle hospital staff?' Severus asked. He was having a hard time imagining the couple before him being willing to trust Muggles with caring for their only son, when mere months prior, they were still working to rid the world of people without magical blood.

Lucius and Narcissa exchanged meaningful looks, as though debating how much information they wanted to share with Severus. Lucius nodded, sighed and took a large drink of wine before he spoke again.

'I have an older brother, Claudius,' Lucius began, causing Severus to shuffle through his memories of Lucius' background to recall if he had known this information before. 'My parents knew there was something different about him, but didn't really know what it was until he was seven years old. He had never displayed any kind of magical ability, and it was at that time, they realised he was... was a...'

Lucius glanced around nervously to make sure no one was close by before learning towards Severus and speaking in a barely audible voice.

'A Squib.'

Severus looked from Lucius to Narcissa, taking in their expressions of deepest shame at this family secret, noticing that they still looked around to make sure Lucius hadn't been overheard. For some odd reason, Severus found the situation amusing. The idea of a Malfoy Squib was mind-boggling, and the fact that Lucius was more embarrassed about having a Squib brother than about the crimes he himself had committed whilst a Death Eater made Severus fight the urge to chuckle at the ludicrousness. But then his mind went back to Draco, and Severus no longer had the urge to laugh.

'And how is this relevant?' Severus asked, anxious to learn more about Draco.

Lucius cleared his throat and resumed a normal speaking volume. 'My parents were ashamed that my brother wasn't a wizard and didn't want it known that they had produced... you know. They sent him to one of the finest Muggle schools in France, where he excelled in academics. I was born a year after he left for school and was raised as an only child. Claudius stayed in France and went on to university to become what the Muggles call a 'psychiatrist'. He took a job at a Muggle psychiatric hospital in Paris, and that is where we have taken Draco. People are aware that we are related to the Lestranges. Between Bellatrix, Rodolphus and a few other family members, they have managed to put several people in the locked ward at the wizarding hospital, which makes it too dangerous to admit Draco there, so my mother recommended placing him at the hospital where my brother works. There are a couple of wizards on staff, so my brother has been able to make sure that only they work with Draco and that any anomalies that could possibly arise can be taken care of with simple Memory Charms.'

Severus watched Lucius for a few moments, with the expectation that at any moment, Lucius would start laughing and exclaiming that it had all been a joke. But Lucius did not start laughing and merely stared back at Severus, waiting for a response.

Severus had just opened his mouth to speak when he was interrupted by the waitress, who came to take their orders. After perusing their menus, Narcissa ordered salmon with mixed vegetables on a bed of rice, while Lucius ordered a rare steak with potatoes. Severus was not feeling very hungry after learning about Draco, but ordered the veal with asparagus anyway. Once they were alone again, Severus returned to the conversation.

'How did Draco handle it?' He asked, finishing off his glass of wine.

Narcissa opened her mouth to speak, but found she couldn't and began to sniffle again, so Lucius offered the information.

'Draco told us he didn't want to go; he wanted to die instead. We had to have him sedated to get him there. Once he was awakened, he told us not to come back to visit him and proceeded to search around the room to find something to harm himself with. That's part of the reason we wanted to see you. We hoped you would visit him from time to time. It's uncertain how long he will have to stay there and we can't stay in Paris indefinitely...' Lucius' voice trailed off, sadness evident in his entire body.

'Claudius has promised he will take care of Draco, but Draco doesn't know him and we hope that maybe Draco will open up to you,' Narcissa said in a small voice, tears running down her pale cheek. 'After all, you are not only his godfather, but were his favourite teacher, Head of House and Headmaster.'

Severus felt as though he were meeting the Malfoys for the first time. Lucius and Narcissa were different people now, with their aristocratic arrogance diminished, though Severus knew it was not completely gone. Lucius and Narcissa wouldn't be moving into a Muggle neighbourhood or be accepting a Muggle-born daughter-in-law at any point in this lifetime, but he could tell that they were suffering tremendous guilt over what happened to their son, as it had been their actions that led Draco into Voldemort's inner circle and now into his psychological hell.

'I would be glad to visit Draco, though I worry that I will not receive a warm reception from him either. After all, I was involved in the same activities as you.' Severus began, not sure how much they wanted to discuss in terms of the past.

Lucius and Narcissa visibly tensed up at the broach of the topic of Voldemort and all they had done. Severus, who had initially felt uneasy about discussing it, suddenly felt no uncertainty. After learning of Draco's breakdown, he was glad to see Lucius and Narcissa squirm.

'If I could go back and take a different path, I would,' Lucius began, his grey eyes looking directly into Severus' black. 'I caused far too much harm to my wife and son by joining the Dark Lord, and I can never take it back or make it up to them.'

'Yes, Lucius, you are right to feel ashamed for what you have done to your family. But what about what you did to other people? You led more than one young man into taking the Dark Mark in your time. I seem to recall you recruiting Avery, Mulciber and Rosier, along with Draco and myself,' Severus said, looking back into Lucius' gaze.

For the first time since he had known Lucius Malfoy, he witnessed true remorse for actions committed to someone outside of his own family. Lucius cleared his throat and took a sip of wine before he spoke.

'I can't even begin... to think about what you've been through, Severus,' Lucius didn't quite meet Severus' gaze as he continued. 'I read the book, by the way. The one Rita Skeeter wrote about you. Was any of it true?'

Severus now wished for a hole to open up and swallow him into the Earth. THIS was the conversation he dreaded most.

'I've read the first two chapters, which were surprisingly accurate,' he admitted.

Lucius and Narcissa glanced at one another, silently asking one another a question.

'Was it true, your feelings for... her?' Narcissa asked, timidly.

'If by her, you are referring to Lily Evans, then yes. It is true. I was her best friend when we were young, as Lucius was aware,' he began, feeling his blood pressure start to rise. 'I was in love with her, as Lucius knew, and I lost her because I thought joining the Death Eaters would help me to keep her, just as Lucius also knew.' His voice had risen in volume as he spoke, to the point that he could be heard over the music and was getting disapproving looks from the patrons at nearby tables. Severus took a large gulp of wine to help settle himself.

His sudden anger towards Lucius was surprising even to himself. He knew he resented his older friend for recruiting him to the Death Eaters, but until now, he had never been able to be honest about anything to do with Lily. It was just now dawning on him how much he had to say on the matter.

Narcissa furrowed her eyebrows, glancing over at her husband. 'You knew that he loved her? Even then?'

Lucius nodded wordlessly.

Severus closed his eyes and took a deep breath before speaking once more.

'You don't know how much I have hated you for doing this to me. Not only for my recruitment to the Death Eaters, but for manipulating me over Lily. You told me that if I were a faithful Death Eater, perhaps the Dark Lord would spare her and she would be mine. It was that belief that helped me to go through with taking my Mark. And it was that belief that ultimately got Lily killed.'

The food arrived, disrupting the atmosphere and giving Severus a chance to gain some perspective. This was not the place to continue having this conversation. And he wasn't sure he wanted to continue to have it. They ate silently, avoiding making eye contact with one another. Severus downed two more glasses of wine before speaking again.

'I must say, Lucius, that I can't completely blame you. I knew what I was getting into and knew it was wrong, so I am as much to blame.' Severus felt that he needed to clarify that before ending the conversation.

'This is not the place to discuss the past in much more detail,' he continued. 'And I'm not quite sure how much I want to talk about it. I've been forced to relive my past to the Ministry and exposed by a truly vile woman for the whole world to read. I want to spend more of my time focusing on the present and the future. If you are truly remorseful for your actions and want to begin to rebuild our friendship, I am willing to do that.'

Lucius half smiled and nodded. 'Yes, Severus. Even with everything that has happened, I count you as a friend. And possibly my only friend.' Narcissa nodded in agreement. 'You were always such a good godfather to Draco.'

Severus ignored the sentimentality. 'Very well, perhaps before you return to Britain, you can come out to my new home.'

Narcissa smiled and reached across the table to grasp Severus' hand. 'Thank you, Severus. We would love that.'

Half an hour later, after obtaining instructions on visiting Draco and giving directions to his new home, Severus departed from the inn, feeling more emotions that he expected. Relief at having made it through the meeting was predicted, but after learning about Draco, he was overcome with guilt. As much as he had tried to save Draco from the horrors of the life he had led, he hadn't been able to do enough. And Severus hoped that it wasn't too late for Draco to be able to recover and lead a normal life.

Referring back to his map, Severus found a second entrance to La Ville located on the next road. The map stated that it came out in an alley behind Le Chaudhron Baveur. Once he arrived at the door, he made his way through it and Disapparated quickly, desiring more than anything to get away from crowds and noise to his quiet, solitary existence by the lake.

A/N: Thanks again to hexgirl and Iza for their help!