Chapter 8

AN: Many thanks to my super, wonderful betas, Clairvoyant and SoftObsidian. Also, many thanks to pythia_delphi for the awesome prompts.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. I make no money here.

As soon as she got home, Hermione stripped out of her clothes, pulled an old T-shirt out of her drawer and over her head. It was one of Harry's that she'd kept since the days of the Horcrux hunt, and it was rather like a security blanket for her. Crawling under the covers, Hermione curled up into a ball. She hadn't cried at all since that day in her office with Lucius, nineteen days ago, and had believed these feelings of despair and depression were finally disappearing. But that was all out the window tonight.

Just when she'd finally made the decision to talk things over with Severus, he'd shown up with Imogene. He'd certainly wasted no time in his search, had he? Of course she was the one who had told him outright there was no future for them, so in reality, she had only herself to blame. Again. She managed to stave off the tears until Jilly hopped up on the bed with her, the little terrier burrowing close to offer her comfort, as if sensing her depression.

"Is this what the rest of our life is going to be like, Jilly? Is this what we have to look forward to? Will we become two old ladies together, living alone until we're old and grey? And all because I was too much of a coward to go after what I really want?"

It was like a summer storm starting slow and building fast until it overtook her completely, her body wracked by sobs. She cried until her throat was raw, her head ached, and her eyes practically swelled shut. She cried until she simply had no more tears to cry, and she was exhausted; then she finally fell blessedly asleep.

When she awoke the next day, she felt like Thestral shit and knew the last thing she wanted to face was a crowd of well-meaning friends. So, the first thing she did when she managed to drag herself out of bed was block her Floo; then she cast an Anti-Apparition spell not only over the house but around the whole yard; and finally, she put up some of the most powerful wards she could think of. No one was getting in here without her permission. After all that she crawled back into bed and slept like the dead for another four hours.

When she eventually awoke for the second time that day, it was nearly eleven a.m. She reflected as she sipped her tea and nibbled on her toast that she'd actually felt much better when she'd hated Severus and blamed him for her alienation from her friends and so many years spent away from home. Now that she knew the truth of the matter, she could no longer blame him, and it only made her feel like an idiot for acting so impulsively all those years ago.

A couple hours later when she heard the ping that announced someone was testing her wards, she simply ignored it. An hour later, there was a much stronger push on her wards, but she ignored that one too. However, an hour after that, Luna's hare Patronus hopped in and delivered a message. "Hermione, I'm waiting outside your gate. May I come in please?"

Hermione opened the front door and looked out to see Luna standing alone at the gate. "Harry's not out there with you, hiding out under his invisibility cloak, is he, Luna?"

"No, Hermione, I'm quite alone," she replied calmly.

"Come on through then," said Hermione, and with a wave of her wand, she adjusted the wards to admit Luna.

"Thanks," said Luna upon entering the cottage. "Harry was quite worried about you. Cissy contacted him to see if he'd heard from you when she found your Floo blocked. She said she'd sent Draco over to check on you, but he couldn't get through your wards. She didn't want to tell Lucius about it, as he'd already threatened to Crucio Severus if he found even a hint that you were unhappy again."

Luna tilted her head to the side and looked at her friend. "You are unhappy again, aren't you, Hermione?"

Hermione blinked back the sting of tears as she nodded. Damn it, she wasn't going to cry any more; she was bloody sick of it. She'd done enough crying to last another ten years.

"Come on, I'll make you some tea," offered Luna, grabbing Hermione's hand and leading her into her own kitchen.

Soon they were settled at the table with a pot of tea and some chocolate biscuits and leftover scones Luna had scrounged from the cupboard. "Harry said he was going to try to break through your wards, but once he realized how complex they were, even he didn't stand a chance. He said Lucius or Severus might have been able to, or one of the high level curse breakers, but he didn't want to call anyone's attention to it officially. He didn't want to get you in trouble, as he was sure there were several spells of a rather dark, questionable, and probably illegal nature."

"I didn't want to be bothered," said Hermione bluntly, making no excuses for her wards.

"That's exactly what I thought. That's why I asked Harry to let me come and talk to you. I figured if I asked politely, you would let me in."

Hermione couldn't help but smile at Luna's simple logic. "Thank you for coming, Luna. I thought I wanted to be alone, but now that you're here, I find myself grateful for your company."

"Can you tell me what's making you so sad, Hermione? It has something to do with Severus, doesn't it?"

Hermione considered for a moment but then decided to tell Luna the truth. She left out most of the really ugly details of her encounter with Severus in the hospital all those years ago. But she did reveal how truly heart broken and devastated she'd been afterward and how that was the reason she'd left England. She also told her how even now her fear of being betrayed again was controlling her life. And she revealed that even though she'd finally realized she had feelings for Severus, she knew it was all too late, as he'd already moved on.

"Oh, Hermione, I'm so sorry," consoled Luna. "I know how hard it must be for you to get over that kind of hurt, but sometimes you just have to take the risk, or else you'll never be able to move forward."

"Oh, Luna, you just can't understand. You have everything...Harry and the kids. Your life is perfect."

"Well, now it is, but don't you think I had to take a chance in the beginning to get that life?"

"Harry's over the moon for you, Luna," said Hermione, exasperated. "He'd do anything for you."

Luna shook her head and smiled a little sadly. "But don't you realize how hard it was for me the first time Harry ever asked me out? Or the second time or even the third? How much I wanted to just say no and close myself off from that possibility?"

"No, I don't. Why would you even have considered that?" wondered Hermione, confused by her friend's statements.

"So I wouldn't be hurt, of course. Do you think I don't know what people said about me, what they still say? 'Oh, there's that Loony Lovegood girl; she's a very odd witch, so strange she might even be a bit mad, or maybe she's just simple minded. What on earth would Harry Potter ever see in someone like her? He'll come to his senses someday, just you wait and see, and then he'll move on.' It was scary, Hermione, giving my heart to Harry and wondering if all those people were right and he might wake up one day and decide he'd made a horrible mistake. For Merlin's sake, he's Harry Potter, the-Boy-Who-Lived, Savior of the Wizarding world, and I'm just plain Loony Lovegood, weird witch extraordinaire. But I'm ever so glad now that I didn't say no to Harry. I'm happy I took a chance.

"And what about Ron and Pansy?" Luna continued on before Hermione had a chance to object. "Don't you think it was a huge risk for them? Her family were traditional purebloods, and his were considered blood traitors, on opposite sides of the war. They were rather like that young couple in the story by that Muggle playwright, Billy Tremblelance."

At Hermione's blank look, Luna prompted, "Surely, you must know the story, it's famous. Romany and Julianna?"

"Er... Romeo and Juliet... by William Shakespeare?"

"Yes, you do know it!" Luna clapped her hands in excitement. "Is that his name, really? Hmmm... Anyway, Ron and Pansy were rather like poor Romany and Julianna; in the beginning, their families and all their friends were at odds with each other. A lot of people said they'd never make it, that they were just too different. But they took a chance, and they got a happy ending, unlike that poor young couple in the story. And now they have a beautiful baby boy and hopefully a lovely future. If you still care for Severus at all, you have to take a chance, Hermione."

"I don't know if I can, Luna. It hurt so much the first time, and I don't think I could bear to have my heart broken again. Besides, it's probably too late already; I'm sure Severus has moved on."

Luna was silent for several minutes, thinking. "There aren't any guarantees in life, Hermione. I can't promise that if you reveal how you feel to Severus, then it will all work out. I don't know if it will. But I do know this: you can lock your heart up in a box, and it'll stay safe there and it won't ever get broken. But years from now, when all is said and done, when you open up that box, you're likely to find that your heart has shriveled up to nothing.

"You're worried that Severus is seeing Imogene, but personally, I don't think he is. Whether that's true or not, though, you'll never know how he feels if you don't ask him. You have to take a risk sometime, Hermione, or you're going to end up, years from now, old and alone with a shriveled up heart in a box.

"Please, take the risk, Hermione, please," pleaded Luna, taking both of her friend's hands in hers and giving them a squeeze of encouragement. "Take a chance on love. Take a chance on Severus."

Hermione held tightly to Luna's hands for a moment as she thought about what she'd said. Then she threw her arms around Luna and hugged her tight. "All those people are so wrong about you, Luna. How did you ever get to be so wise?"

"I've been eating my spinach," she replied as if it were the most logical thing in the world.

"Spinach? I... what?" asked Hermione, looking totally confused.

"Yes, spinach. Like in those Muggle cartoon stories and moving pictures that Ron likes to watch. He said you sent him a whole case of VVDs for Christmas. There are these three stooges; Ron and Harry seem to like them, but I think they're very silly. Then there's this funny redhead named Lucy. Ron has been calling Lucius, Lucy. But Lucius isn't funny at all; in fact, I think he's rather scary. And he's not even a redhead, so I'm not sure exactly what that's all about. But the one I'm talking about is a sailor who eats his spinach, and it makes him very wise; he always saves the day. I figure there's usually a tiny grain of truth in most stories, so I've been eating my spinach."

"Oh, no, it makes him strong, not wise. The spinach makes him strong, Luna," explained Hermione with a smile.

"Really? Well, poo! And I don't even like spinach," she grumbled. Then she flexed her arm. "Maybe I am getting just a bit stronger, though. What do you think?"

"Oh, Luna, I think you are both the wisest and the strongest witch I have ever known. Thank you for being my friend," said Hermione, hugging Luna again.

"You're welcome. Are you going to go talk to Severus, then?" she asked with a hopeful expression.

"Yes, I am," replied Hermione.

"Umm... You might want to change first before you go. Although he would probably enjoy seeing you in nothing but that tee shirt." Luna's brow wrinkled as she studied Hermione, then leaned forward to sniff her shirt. "Isn't that Harry's shirt? I'm sure I remember him wearing it on a Hogsmeade weekend when I was in my fifth year."

Hermione laughed. "Yes, Luna, I'll explain later." She turned to go to her room to get dressed, then paused. "Oh, wait, I don't even know where Severus lives."

Luna smiled. "Well, that's not a problem; I can take you there. Ummm... Hermione, you might want to brush your hair too, not that it isn't lovely like that, all matted and all. It kind of gives you that 'just tumbled out of bed at four in the afternoon' look, but maybe just pull a brush through it a time or two."

Hermione rushed back to hug her one more time. "Oh, Luna, I really do love you."

"Well, I love you too," Luna said. Then she called loudly down the hallway as Hermione dashed off to change, "But I am already married, you know."

~*~

Luna brought Hermione to the lane leading up to Severus' house. "It's up the hill, around the bend and down the other side. I've brought you this far, but you'll have to go the rest of the way yourself."

"Thank you, Luna, for everything. Whatever happens from here on out, whether it's good or bad, I do appreciate all your help," said Hermione.

"Good luck, Hermione," Luna said just before she Apparated away.

Hermione trudged up the hill and over the crest, stopping there to gape at her first site of Snape's home. While it was not on the same scale as Malfoy Manor, it was still huge by her standards. She could have put four Blossomwoods inside with plenty of room to spare. It sat on the other side of the River Divelish upon the high bank. There was a bridge that crossed over the river, and then the lane went on up the hill to the house. She approached slowly as she was very nervous. Unlike her normal plan of action, she had not rehearsed what she was going to say a hundred times, and she was unsure of how her arrival would be received.

As she crossed onto bridge, she breached the first set of wards. Mere heralding wards, not meant to prohibit access but to signal the occupant that someone approached. Most people would not have even noticed the slight waiver of the wards as they passed through, but Hermione did. At the far side of the bridge was a closed iron gate; it fairly crackled with security wards. She held up her wand in one hand with her other arm extended before her, palm vertical, fingers up, sensing the wards. If Harry had thought her wards were tight, he'd find Severus' impenetrable.

She had no intention of trying to breach his wards; that would be incredibly rude. But she stood there for several minutes studying them, feeling them out; they were extremely complex, and she found them fascinating. Even as she studied them, she felt a shift, and new protections were suddenly woven into the fabric of the magical barrier. What in the hell? Was that...?

"Are you trying to break through my wards, Granger?" said a gruff voice from behind her.

She turned to see Severus, already halfway across the bridge. "No, actually, I was just feeling them out," she answered, a bit embarrassed to be caught checking out his wards. "They are very intricate; I'm quite impressed. I must say, though, I haven't run into any wards incorporating house-elf magic before."

"House-elf? What are you talking about?" Stepping up, he examined the wards himself; then he chuckled as he murmured, "Well, that cheeky little bugger. It seems apparent that Ned noted your approach and decided he doesn't like you much. He's added something of his own to the mix."

"Ned would be your house-elf, I assume?"

"That would be correct," he replied, looking at her curiously. "Why are you here, Granger?"

At that instant, Tee rounded the stone abutment at the end of the bridge, and upon seeing Hermione, he gave a bark of joy and barreled forward to greet her. He skidded to a stop directly before her and raised his paw to shake.

Hermione couldn't help but laugh and shook his paw vigorously before giving him a good scratching all over as she chattered at him. "Tee, my friend, I'm so happy to see you! Why haven't you come by to visit me lately? Jilly has missed you too."

The big dog ruffed and growled, as if he were actually trying to respond to her questions.

Severus watched for several seconds. "Who did you come here to see, me or my dog?" he asked in an amused tone.

Hermione stood from where she was bent over petting Tee. Looking up at him through her lashes, she bit her lip nervously before she answered, "You, I came to see you, Severus. Can we talk? Please," she added, afraid he would refuse.

He studied her carefully for several seconds, as if contemplating his answer, before he responded curtly, "Very well, come with me." He turned and the gate opened itself as his wards shifted to let them past, and he led the way to his house.

Once inside, he settled her in a drawing room and excused himself, saying he would be just a few minutes. He'd left the door slightly ajar, and she could hear voices from the back of the house in what she assumed was the kitchen. She couldn't hear everything, but from what she could piece together, he and Ned were having a difference of opinion. The gist of it was, as Snape informed Ned, don't mess with the wards, don't screen the guests, and yes...she's that Hermione Granger.

He returned several minutes later, levitating a tea service, which he set on the table in front of the fireplace. "I thought you might like some tea."

Hermione looked from Severus to the door and back to the teapot. "Umm... Did Ned make that tea?"

He frowned at her as he answered, "Yes, he did."

"I think I'll pass," she replied cautiously.

"Oh for Merlin's sake, he didn't poison it. Here see..." He poured some tea in both cups and took a sip of his. "See? Completely safe."

Hermione swallowed nervously, searching around the room. "I was actually hoping you might have something a bit stronger."

Looking a little puzzled, he stalked across the room and returned with a decanter of brandy and poured a dollop in her tea. He set it down on the table and then snatched it back up and poured some in his tea before plunking it back down again. "Won't you sit?" he offered, indicating the sofa.

Hermione sat down and took a sip of her tea. Instead of sitting in one of the end chairs, Severus went around the table and sat on the other end of the sofa, and he took a sip his tea.

They sat in awkward silence for several moments before he finally spoke. "Is there an actual reason for this visit, or did you just get the sudden urge to come over here to drink tea laced with brandy and stare at my carpet?"

She glanced up at him, her eyes narrowed in irritation. "This is very difficult for me, Severus. Just give me a minute here, okay?"

"Well, excuse me, Hermione. Take all the time you need, of course. It's certainly not as if I have nothing else to occupy my time," he muttered sarcastically.

She sat for several minutes in silence again, gathering her courage. After several false starts, she slumped down again in silence. She stood suddenly, declaring, "Bugger this! I shouldn't have come here. This was a big mistake!"

She rushed toward the door and was nearly there, her fingers on the knob pulling it open when a large hand flashed over her shoulder and slammed it shut. "Stop. Don't go. I'm sorry that I antagonized you. You clearly came here for a reason, and I'd honestly like to know what it is." She nodded and allowed Severus to lead her back to the sofa.

Hermione sat and reached for her teacup; she swallowed the contents in one gulp, then refilled it directly from the brandy bottle and drank that down as well. She eyed the bottle, considering, when Severus cautiously moved it out of her reach to the end of the table.

As the brandy warmed her stomach, she closed her eyes and said, "Before I make a complete fool out of myself, I must know one thing first." She opened her eyes to look at him, and he nodded.

"Okay, then. Just how serious are you about Imogene Cadwalader?"

Severus looked shock by this question. "Imogene? I'm not... that is to say... I'm not even seeing her, really. Why do you ask?"

Hermione huffed out a sigh of relief. "Well, you brought her to the christening, and she seemed very possessive of you, so it seemed logical to assume you two were... you know?"

"No, I don't know. I had escorted her at Pansy's request. Imogene has been reluctant to go out much on her own since Leland died. Why should it matter to you anyway?"

Hermione closed her eyes and heaved another sigh of relief before answering. "Because if you had already begun to form an attachment, then I would not bother you any further. I would not disrupt your life by telling you the things I came here to say."

His brow arched, and his face took on an interested look but he said nothing.

Damn the man! she thought. He just can't make it easy for me, can he?

Finally, he spoke. "Please, Granger, don't keep me in suspense," he said. "What is it precisely you came here to say?"

She licked her lips and looked longingly at the liquor bottle for a few seconds, but then taking another deep breath, she fixed her eyes at a fleck of lint on the floor and plunged ahead. "I've had a lot of time on my hands, and I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. I've come to realize that despite everything... Dear Merlin, I have feelings for you. Maybe I always have. But when I let you leave my house that day, I knew as soon as you left that I'd made a horrible mistake..."

"Hermione," he interrupted.

"No, Severus, don't stop me, please," she said, holding up her hand. Her eyes were still glued to the carpet. She just couldn't bring herself to look into at his face, terrified she would see rejection there. "I have to say this, or I never will. This is very difficult for me. I came here on an impulse, you see. I really haven't had time to prepare what I was going to say, or to revise, or to rehearse, or anything at all. So, this is just off the top of my head, and if I don't say it now, I'll never be able to get it out.

"Where was I? Oh yes... I'd made a horrible mistake, and I knew it as soon as you left. I couldn't fix it, though, because I was still too scared to willingly give you that much power over me. But somehow, you already had the power whether I gave it to you or not. Because when I realized you had offered me the chance to have just what I wanted all those years ago and I turned it down, I was miserable and depressed and damn near despondent."

"Hermione..."

"Severus, please, just let me finish, or I'll never get it all out. I cried for nearly twenty-four bloody hours straight. I was so distracted when I went to work that I nearly lost a hand to Shefflelump's Slicing Curse. Such a stupid mistake! A rookie would have recognized it. I tried to resign after that, but Lucius wouldn't hear of it, and he insisted I take some time off instead." This whole time, Hermione's eyes hadn't shifted from the floor in front of her. Now she glanced out of the corner of her eye at his shoes, too frightened to risk looking at his face, so she tried to ascertain by staring at his feet whether he even gave a damn about anything she was saying.

"So, I had lots of time to think over the last couple of weeks, and I'd already come to the conclusion that I would ask you to give me a second chance at working on a relationship. When I saw you at Andrew's christening, I was just about to ask you to consider it or at least ask you to talk to me later. Then along comes Imogene with her auburn hair and her perfect breasts and her ready-made family, and she seemed so possessive of you, but maybe that was just me thinking it was so. And you said you'd escorted her there, and you seemed so perfect for each other, and I just knew that I'd lost any chance through my own stubbornness and pride and fear..."

"Hermione, please..."

"Severus wait!" She held her hand up again. "I know it sounds like I'm rambling but I'm almost there. I swear. Please, just a moment more." Her voice shook now, and a few tears leaked from her eyes although she had sworn she would not cry any goddamn more! "I knew I'd lost my chance, and I was miserable all over again, and I don't want to be old and grey and living alone with my dog. You said it was fate and maybe you were right because I've never felt about any other man the way I feel about you. Perhaps that's simply because I've been guarding my heart all this time like Luna said, but I don't want to end up with nothing but a shriveled up heart in a box! She's so wise and strong, and maybe it's the spinach, but I think it's just because she's Luna, and she told me to come here and tell you, so I did, and oh... Oh... Oh, good Godric, Severus. Say something!"

Hermione stopped talking, and there was dead silence in the room. She glanced over. Severus' feet hadn't moved; they weren't telling her a damn thing. She heard him clear his throat, and then a hand appeared in front of her, offering a handkerchief. She took it and wiped her cheeks and her eyes, and she loudly blew her nose.

Her eyes rose slowly from his feet up to his knees, gradually up his legs, past his hips and his waist, over his chest and the scars on his neck until she finally, reluctantly, met his eyes. His head was cocked slightly to the side, and there was just the trace of a smirk as one corner of his mouth lifted.

Finally, he spoke, "I must admit, I have no idea what even half of that meant." She started to look away in defeat when Severus caught her eyes and continued, "But honestly, love, you had me from the words, 'Dear Merlin, I have feelings for you.'"

Hermione's brain took a moment to process his words. "Really?" she squeaked.

"Yes, really."

She lunged, and his arms and his lap were full of witch. "You arse! You could have said something!"

He laughed, Severus Snape actually laughed. "I tried. I tried several times, and you kept telling me to wait until you were done."

She was about to ask him when had he ever let what she or anyone else wanted stop him before, but then he was kissing her, and she was much too distracted to care.

She returned his kisses in kind, and soon, their hands were everywhere, pulling at each other's clothes, trying to get to skin. He nibbled his way down her neck and across her collar bone until he reached the top of her breasts. Severus gathered the hem of her jumper and pulled it roughly over her head, tossing it aside. Straddling his lap, Hermione rose to her knees; his hands gripped her arse, and she whimpered as his hardness pressed against her. Arching forward to undo the back of her bra, she practically pushed her breasts into his face. He pulled the offending garment away, and as her breasts spilled out, he buried his face in her cleavage.

Lifting his eyes to hers, Severus spoke low and urgently, "Dear gods, Hermione, I want you now."

"I thought you'd never ask," she said. "Take me upstairs, Severus, please."

Within an instant, Severus Apparated them to his bedroom.

Much, much later, as they lay twined in each other's arms, Severus whispered, "Will you stay with me?"

"Forever," she promised.

~FIN~

An Epilogue (of a sort)

Severus and Hermione didn't get married and live happily-ever-after, at least not right away. They agreed that it was important to take it slow at first. They both had too many issues.

Still, they simply couldn't get enough of each other, which Draco could attest to when he popped over to the country house unexpectedly one day and caught them in the garden in flagrante. In all fairness, both Tee and Jilly had tried to stop him from going out there, but he just wouldn't listen. He swore seeing his godfather and the girl who was practically his sister going at it like Kneazles in heat would definitely scar a man. But he was happy for them anyway.

They did get to the happily-ever-after eventually; they married three years later and decided to enlarge and live at Blossomwood. The country house was lovely, but they much preferred the hominess and solitude of the cottage. They lived there, just the two of them, along with Ned and Tee and Jilly, until eventually the babies came along, first Claire, then Luke, and finally Fionna.

Severus eventually left his job as Dark Arts Consultant with the D.I.D.A. and became the Head of the Ministry Bureau of Investigation, which made him Hermione's boss. But that only lasted until the year Fee went off to Hogwarts. That was when Hermione became the first Muggle-born to be elected Minister of Magic. And that technically made her Severus' boss. Again.

Their life was full and happy and never boring. And it was all because they'd both finally learned to take a chance on love.

~FIN~

AN: As promised here is the original prompt from pythia_delphi for the SSHG_Exchange fic: Severus has mellowed considerably since the war and is now good mates with Harry and Ron. Hermione, however, is a different matter. She cannot bring herself to forgive or forget Severus' unkind remarks and personal insults to her at school and either goes out of her way to provoke him or avoids him altogether. This, of course, turns Severus on immensely, and he determines to win her over. Humour, romance, sarkiness, and a happy ending please. A little OOC is a-okay.

I varied it slightly in this: She cannot bring herself to forgive or forget Severus' unkind remark and personal insults to her at school. I changed that part just a bit as that seemed petty to me, so for the purpose of my fic, I wanted her to have some bigger reason for her aversion to Severus.