Chapter Four

Hermione had woken up strangely at ease and quite lethargic for the first time in months. She stretched, or attempted to, and the pain that resulted triggered an anxiety attack. Everything overwhelmed her at once. Not only was she in pain and blind, but she didn't remember where she was, and she couldn't breathe. So tangled were her emotions and senses, that she didn't realize when she was no longer alone. Slowly, the smell of sandalwood and green herbs pervaded her mind, and Hermione tried fiercely to focus on that.

"That's right, Miss Granger, slow, deep breaths. You were hyperventilating, on the verge of passing out. Calm yourself, let the panic fade away. Very good,now, rather than risk your throat, may I use Legilimency on you, so you can tell me what happened?" Professor Snape's soft rumble wrapped around the herbal scent, and Hermione began to relax.

She choked back a painful sob and nodded her head in assent. As soon as she felt him ease into her mind, she began babbling. "I'm sorry, sir. I don't know what happened. I woke up, and suddenly I was overwhelmed, and then the pain... I vaguely remember something bad, but it's like a dream."

"The memories," the professor responded. "There are residuals there, but nothing that can harm you. However, you've suffered an anxiety attack, I presume from waking up to pain and not being able to see your surroundings."

Hermione agreed. "Yes, I think that's what started it. I think I was fine when I woke, but then I moved wrong. It hurt so badly, that I forgot where I was... "

"Understandable, Miss Granger. You remember our conversation earlier? It will take you time to come to terms with everything, but you will. Now, do you feel up to some tea and perhaps something light to eat? I'm afraid you are relegated to soup or custard for now. I don't want you getting ill on top of everything else. But first, a healing potion for your throat. The damage was caused by a potion, and I have an antidote. It is possible that the scarring won't resolve completely though, because it has been so long since the injury was done."

Hermione nodded and accepted the vial that the Potions master placed in her hand. She quickly drank the spicy, cobalt liquid and shuddered as it eased over the ruined parts of her throat. It was like fire, then ice, and then blissfully, no pain.

The Professor watched intently, waiting for anything to happen. Finally he asked, "Miss Granger? Can you speak?"

"Custard?" Hermione rasped out, licking her lips. "What kind?"

"Vanilla. Nothing too strong yet." Professor Snape rolled his eyes. "Typical--head straight for the sweets. Is your throat painful?"

Hermione smiled sadly. "No, just scratchy." She took a breath and continued. "My parents are... were dentists. I didn't get the chance for sweets like most kids, so I jump at them when I can now. Oh, but nothing overly sweet. I suppose I did inherit something from them." Her voice broke, and her shoulders shook from the strain of holding in her sobs.

Professor Snape closed his eyes and took a breath. "There now, Miss Granger. No need to cry... "

He was interrupted by a whirl of robes and his mother's voice. "There, there, dear, it will be fine. You cry and get it all out." Eileen placed a tray on the table by the bed and glared at her son. "Get out of my way. Obviously, the poor dear needs some comforting, and you are not doing a very good job." She manhandled Severus off the edge of the bed and took his place, arms wrapping lightly around the shuddering girl.

"You just cry; it will make you feel much better." Eileen rocked Hermione slightly and let her scream her sobs into her shoulder. After several minutes, the sobs quieted and Eileen pulled away to look into Hermione's face. "Better?" She asked.

Hermione nodded and then blurted, "Who are you?" She blushed bright red as she realized what she had done.

"My name is Eileen Snape. I'm Severus' mum."

"But I thought you were dead. When I looked up... " Hermione broke off, embarrassed at what she had revealed.

Eileen just laughed softly. "Everyone was supposed to think I was dead. It was a small sacrifice to keep Severus safe. Vol... "

"Mother!"

"Oh, very well. You Know Who wanted Severus to kill me as part of his initiation, something about lowering myself to marry a Muggle... like his own mother hadn't done the same thing... well, no matter, and I'm babbling, but this is a place I found out about when my uncle on my father's side died. I came here to hide away, and have been waiting on you for a long time."

"Mum, please... " Severus interrupted. "Miss Granger needs more healing potions, some food, and I daresay, more rest. There is time enough for your gossip later."

Eileen conceded defeat, not very elegantly, but she allowed herself to be bustled off after promising Hermione that she would return the next day with something to read. "I will come sit with you and read so you won't be lonely or bored. I am sure that son of mine would talk your ears off about potions, but I have some more interesting things to read. If you are interested."

Severus rolled his eyes at his mother's blatant manipulations. "Go, Mum; don't you have a history book begging to be read? I am sure that Miss Granger will welcome you back later."

Hermione smiled at the amused exasperation she heard in the Professor's voice and spoke to the lady. "Thank you so much. I look forward to reading with you tomorrow, Mrs. Snape."

"Eileen, my dear, call me Eileen."

A snort from Severus, and Eileen was gone, closing the door softly behind her.

"Your mother is very kind."

"She is, but she can be quite bossy. Don't let her push you around." There was a note of resignation in that statement.

"I take it you have experience with that?" Hermione probed.

It was a shame indeed that Hermione couldn't see the elegant arch of that brow. "Would you like that custard now, Miss Granger?"

"Yes, please," Hermione agreed. "I think I can manage if you hand me the dish rather than setting a tray on my lap." She hesitated, then plunged onward. "Could you call me, Hermione? I realize it's a bit awkward, but otherwise I still feel like I am at school, and I think we are way beyond that... "

"Very well, Hermione. And you may call me Severus, if you prefer."

A small, warm dish was pressed into Hermione's hand, and she welcomed the feel of it leaching the chill from her skin. A spoon was placed in her other hand, and she carefully took a scoop and savoured the light vanilla flavor that burst on her tongue.

"MMMMM... " Hermione closed her eyes and settled back into her pillows. "I don't remember the last time I had something substantial to eat."

Severus tilted his head and looked at her. "What can you remember? I didn't take everything, just the worst of your memories, the ones that had to do with potions and spells, and the ones that were extremely violent."

Hermione took another bite of her custard, and pondered her answer. After a few minutes, she spoke. "I don't remember anything vividly after You Know Who told Greyback to take me. Mostly, I remember feelings, and what seems like visions. And then, after I couldn't see at all, it was back to voices and feelings. That sort of thing."

"That is to be expected. The majority of the memories I gathered were from before that night. I know it's hard, but if you could tell me some of the things that happened after you were struck blind, that would help me. I know that Bella cast that curse when she visited to get a report for the Dark Lord. I have all your pertinent memories up until then; I also have Cissy's memories that cover the time after you were cursed and... "

Hermione shuddered, and almost dropped the dish in her hand. "That's why I can't see. I tried to stop them from hurting Narcissa, and... well, that woman is a lunatic. Bellatrix screamed at Narcissa for trying to help me, and then she told three of Greyback's newest pack members to hurt her. I do remember Greyback was furious. I begged for them to stop and Bellatrix threw a spell at me. My eyes burned like fire, and after I could only hear the screams, but it did make the rest of it even more horrible. I couldn't prepare myself for anything. It just happened."

Tears were running down Hermione's face, and Severus took the almost empty custard dish from her hands, exchanging it with a handkerchief, and then a cup of tea. "Do you think you can go on?"

She nodded. "I think so. I have to."

*****

Severus stopped speaking abruptly. This part of Hermione's tale made him exceedingly uncomfortable, not just because of the details, but because of how she had let it eat at her self-worth. Severus was afraid that Hermione might fall back into that well of self-loathing and despair he and Eileen had fought so hard to drag her from. As private a man as he was, it rankled even more that he had to share private details of Hermione, details that she'd had trouble sharing with him in the beginning.

His sudden silence prodded Harry into snidely remarking, "What's wrong, Snape? Forgot what you were going to say next, or having trouble spinning out some more lies?"

Dumbledore's voice rang out over Severus' in answer. "Harry, as you are an important part of these proceedings I will allow you to remain, but if you don't refrain from this childish behavior, then I will be forced to silence you."

Harry didn't listen. "I want to know what he's hiding. There's no way he knows everything that happened. I don't care what you say. I want to know what happened to Hermione, and I want to know now."

Severus opened his mouth to lambast the boy for his arrogance, but once again was over ridden by another.

"Harry, please... " Hermione's sultry voice was thick with sleep, but powerful in its intonation. "You don't really want to know what happened to me, to know those things that I saw and heard and felt. You simply want to hate Severus." She turned towards her husband, knowing he was exhausted and irritated over the evening's development. "I want to check on Alex, but first I think I need to relate this part of the story myself."

Severus stood from his chair and moved to support Hermione. "That's not necessary, love, I'll tell them what they need to know." He looked down into her tired face. "You look exhausted, let's get you to bed."

"No." Hermione touched his face gently. "I know how hard this part is for you, and it is my story to tell."

None of the Order had made a move or a sound, but simply watched the interaction between Severus and Hermione. Even Ron merely observed the proceedings without interrupting.

"Well, if you are going to tell your story, you might as well be comfortable." Severus waved his wand over the ladder-back chair he had been seated on. Instantly, the chair widened and became soft and plush. He took Hermione's hand, and encouraged her to sit in the new seat.

She smiled up at her husband and said, "Did you give up that stiff chair for me?" She patted his cheek. "Be careful, love, someone might think you like me.

Severus rolled his eyes and moved to stand behind Hermione's chair. Hermione, still smiling, turned to face the Order.

"Oi! I thought you were blind!" Ron blurted out over the silence. He looked around at the pained expressions on several faces. "What? What did I say?"

Hermione looked right at him. "I can still hear, Ron... and smell." She got a bit of an unfocused look about her. 'I can tell who is here, and where they are."

Ron sat back in his seat, cheeks flaring red. "Yeah, well, you just didn't act blind," he huffed.

Nervous laughter filled the room, everyone looking at each other until Remus finally spoke. "Hermione, earlier I frightened you. What... "

Hermione swallowed heavily and reached for the hand Severus had rested on the back of her chair. He grasped her shoulder and squeezed, then took her hand in his. "It is your tale to tell; stop if it gets too much, and I will finish."

She nodded, and smiled sadly up at her husband. "I'll be OK."

Hermione turned her sightless eyes towards her former best friend. "Harry, you accused Severus of lying and other terrible things. I still say you don't want to know the truth; you just want to hate Severus. "

Harry didn't answer Hermione's accusation. After all, she was right. He truly didn't want to know what Greyback had done to her in all those months she was his prisoner.

"You have to know about my time with the werewolves to truly understand why things have worked out the way they have. Severus has done nothing but protect and honor me. I expect that he be given his just due."

That said, Hermione sat back and sank into the memories that she tried desperately not to dwell on. Severus leaned over and spoke gently. "I left off where you told me about why you were blinded."

Hermione thanked Severus and began her narration.

*****

Hermione took a deep breath, knowing that Prof... no, Severus needed to know what happened next. He was going to have a time trying to determine all the potions that had been used on her. Bellatrix was nothing if not inventive. And as long as the girl stayed virginal, she was allowed to play.

"They left us in that cell for a long time; Narcissa told me they were waiting on a potion. That was all she knew. I wasn't allowed out, but they would come and get her pretty often. She would come back bruised and bleeding, but no one ever bit her. She told me that she was basically a servant, cooking and cleaning. I know that had to be horrible for her, and I'm not so naive about things any longer."

Severus agreed, but he also confirmed her fears. "Cissy was the guarantee that you would be a virgin when the Solstice was reached. She did what she had to do to keep you safe." He hesitated, then went on. "Hermione, no matter that Draco was the initial reason she saved you, Narcissa Malfoy thought very highly of you before the end. I have seen her memories. That is why Bella killed her. She saw that Cissy was beginning to look on you as the daughter she never had."

Hermione let out a harsh sound, and the teacup she had been holding shattered. Blood welled up in the numerous cuts on her hands, and the smell of the blood, along with the knowledge that Narcissa had been used by Greyback and his pack overwhelmed her.

She lashed out at Severus, attempting to strike him. He grabbed her wrist, and had turned her hand over to cast a healing charm when she panicked. Hermione went wild, swinging and kicking, getting tangled into the bedcovers. Severus, not wanting to use a spell to stop her, finally wrapped his arms around her, pinning her to his chest.

"Miss Granger... Hermione. Cease."

The harsh directive broke through the panic, and Hermione began to falter. She still struggled as he held her tightly, and she soon remembered where she was. Before she could withdraw in mortification, Severus eased her back onto her pillows, cast a Cleansing Spell and said, "Let me see to your wounds."

He gently took her wrists and healed the slashes caused by the broken teacup. Luckily, she had drunk most of the tea, so there were no burns to tend.

"I am so sorry. Please, forgive me... " The desolate plea tore at the normally stoic man.

"There is nothing to forgive. I am positive that this is the first of many other scenes as we work through your trauma. I swear to you, I won't ever hold it against you, nor will I ever use the knowledge I gain to harm you."

The tingle of the magical oath shivered over the two, and Hermione spoke again. "Should I continue my story?"

"If you wish."

"As I told you, for ages I was just kept in the cell. I completely lost track of time and I never asked the date. I'm not sure Narcissa would have known if I had asked her, especially then. For the first time since we had been there, no one came for her. I don't know how long we were in that cell, but after a while, Greyback came to get Narcissa himself. While he was there, he told me that it was time to prepare me for my mate, and these women came in. They were part of the pack."

Hermione began trembling. "They washed me while he watched. It was horrible. They took my clothes, and they washed me. I never got anything to wear after that."

"When they were done washing me, they rubbed this foul smelling salve all over my body... everywhere. I remember that it made me burn. My skin felt like there were things crawling on it, and it made me crazy." Hermione bowed her head. "I tried to fight them."

Severus reached out and took Hermione's hand. "We can stop for now, if you like. I can imagine this is difficult for you."

Hermione shook her head. "No, I have to do this now. I don't know why, but I know that four times in a row they came in, and tormented me with that salve. I fought so hard that Greyback had me chained up. That's also when I was cursed. They left me alone for a stretch of time again, then it happened for another four times. The last time it happened, Narcissa tried to stop them and she was killed. Then I was brought to you."

"Can you tell me any symptoms of the salve, other than the itchy skin?" Severus frowned in thought.

"They put it all over my body, and it was hot feeling, then itchy. It made me restless, I remember that. I would lie on the cell floor, and the only reason I stayed sane was Narcissa. She never touched me, but she would play with my hair 'til I slept."

"Do you remember anything at all about the smell or the texture of the salve?"

"It was thick and sticky. It smelled like them... like werewolf. I don't think I can tell you anything else... specifically." Hermione trailed off, embarassed, tears rolling down her cheeks.

"Hermione, you have done nothing to be ashamed of. You can tell me anything and I won't... "

She interrupted his speech. "I'm sorry; you have been nothing but kind to me. I know that if the Headmaster can trust you, so can I, but I can't do this right now."

Disappointed, Severus agreed. "I'm sorry I pushed. You rest while I go begin brewing the healing potions you need. Call me or my mother if you need anything." He placed what felt like a rope in her hand. "This is a bellpull. Once for me, twice for Mum."

Hermione simply nodded, then lay back down. As soon as she heard the door close, she burst into sobs and eventually cried herself to sleep.

Severus made his way to his lab, and proceeded to work out his frustrations on innocent potions ingredients. He wasn't sure why he was so upset. Of course the topic would be supremely painful for Hermione, but why did it hurt him when she said she trusted him because of Albus? He pushed the thoughts out of his head, tamped down the emotions, and lost himself to the potions he was brewing.

*****

Eileen watched her son as he walked determinedly away from Hermione's room. She could tell he was agitated, even though he didn't slam the door. She had been been to the library and was returning to her bedroom when she heard the commotion in Hermione's room. Rather than exacerbate the situation, she allowed Severus to handle things, but she stood sentry outside the door in case she was needed. She quickly slipped into her own room when she heard him making his way to the door. It wouldn't do to be caught snooping, she thought wryly.

After she watched Severus make his way to the stairs and disappear from sight, Eileen made her own way to Hermione's door and she tapped lightly, letting herself in as she did. She saw and heard the girl crying, but decided that it would be wiser to allow her to get the emotions out and under control. There was too much at stake to have everyone at each other's throats. Eileen slipped back into the hallway and headed to the library. She would be paying a call on Hermione much sooner than she anticipated, and she wanted to be prepared.