Chapter 7
Chapter 7 of 16
phoenixSeverus Snape, Deputy Headmaster, is beholden to no man with the Dark Lord finally vanquished and Dumbledore gone. He is free to choose the course that his life takes, to make friends, to finally know what it means to lead a normal life. How does he adapt to being able to experience this normality. Sequel to "Wounded" (the link is in the story). Rating is for later chapters.
Chapter 7
Snape knew that voice. He hated that voice. "I am getting a drink," he replied dryly.
"Why are you even at this ball?" demanded Potter.
Picking up his drinks, Severus turned to face Potter. "I am the Deputy Headmaster. That is a position deserving of some respect, whether you realize it or not. If you will excuse me, it would be rude for me to keep my date waiting." Once his back was turned, he couldn't keep the self-satisfied grin from spreading across his face. Potter had looked absolutely dumbfounded at the idea that he would be actually be here accompanied by a woman.
"What's with the smirk?" Aurelia asked as she took the glass of wine from him.
"I ran into an old acquaintance. How much more socializing is expected of us?"
She smiled at him. "Another ten or fifteen minutes before dinner. I expect dinner will take a little over an hour, and then there will be dancing until midnight."
When the puddings were brought out, Severus realized that this part of the evening was nearly over. At least dinner had taken longer than she had anticipated. That would mean less time for dancing. Thankfully, about the only person paying him much attention was Potter, but he had long ago grown accustomed to the young man staring at him. Everyone applauded politely when Aurelia accepted the donation to the Poisons Ward. Severus was looking around the room trying to determine who the one million Galleon donor was. He presumed that anyone in the wizarding world capable of donating such a large sum of money must be in attendance at the ball tonight, but no one seemed to be taking credit for their act of generosity. This struck him as very odd. He didn't like mysteries, especially those that involved people close to him.
Once the donation was accepted, the last plates were cleared away, and the musicians began setting up on stage.
When Aurelia returned to her seat, she leaned close and asked, "Sure you won't change your mind?"
"I believe that I have already informed you that I don't dance."
Once the dancing began and Aurelia found herself whisked away to the dance floor, Severus found a secluded corner where he could observe and hopefully not have to deal with Potter again. Whenever one of the waiters passed by with a tray, he would invariably refresh his drink. However, watching Aurelia laugh and smile as she made her way around the dance floor, he began to rethink his decision. She had stopped by a few times, but someone always whisked her away to dance. There were decidedly fewer witches than wizards at the Ball.
As midnight approached, he decided that perhaps he had been too hasty in his decision not to remain at her side. He would dance, but only with her.
"May I cut in?"
Aurelia's partner gave her a questioning look and she nodded. Once she was with Severus, she asked, "I thought you said didn't know how to dance?"
"I merely said that I don't dance, not that I didn't know how. For you, I will make an exception."
She couldn't control the blush on her cheeks. "Thank you."
They danced to three songs before the countdown to midnight began. During those songs, she gazed at him fondly. The last song had been quite slow, and she had danced very close to him. When the countdown reached zero, he looked into her eyes.
She whispered, "Happy New Year, Severus," and reached up to kiss him.
Returning her kiss, he wrapped her in his arms. He was pleased to feel her doing the same. When he broke the kiss, he replied, "And Happy New Year to you, too." He could see the look in her eyes, the affection they betrayed. "It's late, do you want to leave?"
"All right," she said breathlessly.
When they arrived at her house, they found Helen and Julia asleep in front of the Wireless. Aurelia was able to get Julia semi-conscious and led her upstairs. "Could you carry Helen?"
"Of course," he replied.
As soon as she closed the door to Julia's room, he pushed her against the wall and captured her mouth in a passionate kiss, eager to see if her look at the Ball meant what he thought it did.
Aurelia returned the kiss for a few moments before pulling away. "The girls," she protested.
"They are most definitely asleep." He laced his fingers in her hair and kissed her neck.
She moaned softly before pulling away again. "But what if they wake?"
He was decidedly frustrated. She had said they should get to know each other, and that's what they had been doing for the last week. He had shown patience, shown interest in her, been attentive and respectful. He sighed, forcing himself to remain calm. Let her set the pace, he admonished. "That is highly unlikely." He would do his best to convince her to see things his way.
"You've had quite a bit to drink tonight."
"What if I have?" he asked as he began nibbling at her neck again.
"Not this way. I think we should both be sober."
"I'm not that drunk," he replied. Feeling her resolve was faltering, he continued, "I know you feel the same way I do."
"I do. But not like this. Later. Please?"
She had been teasing him all week. She had flirted with him, touched him affectionately, given him all the signals that she was ready, and now she was pushing him away again. "Aurelia," he said insistently.
She tried to pull away. "I...I'm not ready yet," she replied nervously.
Realizing that further pressure might just drive her away, he forced control of his emotions. "All right. So this is goodnight?"
She smoothed his robes where he had wrinkled them. "I think it's best right now." After giving him one last kiss, she whispered, "Goodnight."
He waited until she had closed her door, then he did his best not to slam his own. Deciding that he was now not drunk enough, he decided to open the bottle of Scotch she had given him for Christmas; it was the only way he would get any sleep.
He had thought they had made progress, but she was still tentative, unwilling to take that last step. He could tell that she was unlikely to do so while her children were here. She was hiding behind them. Once they were gone, he hoped that would change, that it would free her from her inhibitions. Taking another gulp from his glass, he tried to calm down.
In his increasing state of inebriation, he found it more and more difficult to formulate his plan to convince her they were ready for the next step. Any momentary flash of clarity was soon lost in the alcoholic haze. At least it will help me sleep, he mused as he stared at the amber liquid in his glass.
***********
After shutting her door, Aurelia closed her eyes and sighed. It would have been so easy to give in to him. They had both had a fair amount to drink, enough to dull inhibitions. She was glad that her girls had been home. If they hadn't been here, she wasn't sure that she would have resisted. Am I ready for this? She paced her bedroom, realizing she didn't know the answer to that question despite what she had told him. There was a part of her that wanted to just go next door, tell him how she felt.
Dancing together, she had felt more alive than she had in the last year. As she put her dress robes away, she realized why she wasn't sure if she was ready. The two of them may have become close friends since the day he had finally regained consciousness, may have discussed having a physical relationship, but there had never been any discussion of an emotional relationship. That was something that she needed to know. Mere physical attraction and lust were not enough.
But how to discuss that with him? He was a very complex man who did not willingly expose his emotions to others. She had to know that what he felt for her was something more than the lustful desires of a lonely man. What she felt for him was definitely more, but she didn't want to drive him away by declaring her feelings before he was ready. She wasn't in any hurry and could wait for him as long as it took.
As she lay in her room, she thought about how nice it would be to have someone to share her bed again. It was always comforting to feel the presence of another, feel his arms wrapped around her. She tossed and turned, unable to fall asleep. He had said that she felt the same way about him that he felt about her, and she couldn't deny that she was attracted to him. Many times over the last few days, she had imagined what sort of lover he would be. She had no doubt that he would be enthusiastic, and although she knew that their first time together would be awkward, still, she had the impression that he would be a very physical lover.
Thinking about it only made the situation worse. It had been a long time since she had last had sex. Was it really that important that he tell her explicitly that he loved her? For that matter, did he love her? She thought the answer was yes, even if he found it difficult to say out loud. That was a reasonable assumption on her part, wasn't it?
Deciding the answer was 'yes', she pulled on her dressing gown and slipped out of her room. Checking on the girls, she saw they were both soundly asleep. Pausing with her hand on the other doorknob, she realized this was her last chance to change her mind. Realizing he might be asleep, she slowly opened the door.
He was slumped at his desk, a half-empty glass of Scotch beside him. After checking to make sure he was still breathing, she retrieved her wand. Once she had him in an upright position, she removed his dress robes, freezing for a moment when she realized that he was wearing nothing beneath them. While she had seen him in the buff before, it had been while he was her patient. Forcing herself to look away, she placed him in bed.
Kissing him gently on the lips, she whispered, "I'm so sorry."
Returning to her room, she tried to decide what to do next. She had gone to him, fully expecting to take their relationship to the next level. Would she still feel that way tomorrow? Was this for the best? Time would tell. She would rise early and talk to him.
The following morning, she knew that he would be quite hung over and prepared a nice breakfast to take up to him, complete with Hangover Relief Potion.
"Serving the professor breakfast in bed?" Julia asked wryly.
"We got in late last night, and the Ball was quite the celebration."
"He's hung over, isn't he?"
"Even if he is, you will not mention it. In a few years, I suspect you may find yourself acting foolishly on New Year's."
"Yes, Mum," Julia replied just a bit sullenly.
"Did the two of you make it until midnight?"
"I did, barely. Helen fell asleep around eleven."
"Since I'm feeling generous, your only chore today will be to clean up the breakfast mess. Tomorrow, you can pack up for school, and then we'll make one last trip to London if need be."
"Yes, Mother. I'll let Helen know."
Aurelia took the tray upstairs and was not surprised to find Severus' room still dark. After setting the tray on the desk, she lit the lamp and set it on low light. Sitting next to him on the bed, she leaned down and kissed him softly on the cheek. "Good morning, Severus."
He grunted, rolled over and pulled his pillow over his head.
"I brought you something for the hangover, but you are going to have to sit up to drink it."
"Go away," came his muffled reply from under the pillow.
She gently pulled the pillow up. "You know you will feel better, so just get it over with. After you've drunk the potion, I brought breakfast, and I thought we'd eat up here."
He crawled out from under his pillow and drank the potion. He then gratefully accepted the glass of water she offered him. "Did you put me to bed last night?"
"I did. I thought you would be more comfortable." She picked up the tray and was going to move it to the bed.
"I am not an invalid. I don't need to eat in bed," he said gruffly.
"As you wish." She smiled softly as she set the tray back on the desk and waited for him to rise from bed.
He started to stand up and realized he was not wearing any clothes. Quickly pulling the blanket back over himself, he replied, "Perhaps I will eat here."
"Oh come now. It's nothing I haven't seen before," she said playfully as she brought the tray over to the bed. After placing the tray down, she sat next to him and poured coffee. "I had a good time last night."
He saw that she had a very sincere smile. "As did I. Thank you for bringing breakfast up."
She laughed softly. "I thought it would be best if the girls were spared seeing a hung over Professor Snape."
For once, he didn't mind the laughter, for he knew that she was not laughing at him as so many others had done. In the low light of the lamp she looked almost angelic. He couldn't help but notice how romantic a gesture bringing him breakfast in bed was. Could she finally be willing to move forward? "Are the girls downstairs?" He tried to sound casual, but wasn't sure he succeeded.
She slowly lowered her cup back to the saucer. "They are. How is your headache?"
He tried not to look disappointed. A large part of him had hoped that she had sent them to a friend's house. Reaching out to brush her cheek, he replied, "Completely gone." He leaned forward when she did not move away and pressed his lips against hers. When she didn't resist, he pulled her closer and deepened the kiss. After a few seconds, he lowered her to the bed and began unfastening her robes.
She gently pushed him away. "Severus, the girls are downstairs."
He pushed past her and nibbled her neck, his morning arousal partially dictating his behavior. "Send them away. I want you."
"I want you, too, but not right now," she replied reluctantly.
"When? We've waited so long."
She pushed him away, again. "We have, but for good reason."
He tried to hide his frustration. "And what might that reason be?"
Sitting up, she turned away from him. "I think we've gotten to know each other quite well."
"We have, though I would like to get to know you even better." He reached out for her shoulder, trying to pull her closer.
Turning to face him, she looked into his eyes. "I would, too, but..."
He could feel his heart sink. There was nothing good that could come after that sort of 'but'. "But what?" he asked quietly.
She reached down and grasped his hand. "This is a very big step. One that we should be sure of."
This morning was not going in the direction he had hoped after the manner in which she had woken him. "Are you not sure?"
She shifted nervously, not meeting his eyes. "I want to be sure. There's something I need to know."
He was quickly tiring of this game, but asked gently, "What might that be?"
Before she could answer, there was a knock at the door.
"Come in," she replied quickly.
Julia stuck her head into the room. "Professor, an owl came for you with an urgent message." She crossed the room and handed him a letter.
Opening the letter, he first skimmed through it, but when he realized how serious it was, he went back and took his time. By the time he had gotten to the end, he knew that he had to leave immediately. "I apologize, but I must return to Hogwarts straight away." Rising from the bed, he picked up his wand and quickly packed his belongings.
"What is it?" she asked, clearly concerned.
"There has been an accident, and Madam Pomfrey requires my skills as Potions master." He did not want to tell her all the details. The less she knew, the better.
"Is there anything I can do to help?"
"Not at the moment. If the situation does not improve, I will notify you, but a great deal of discretion is required." He still could not believe they were protecting that oaf, Hagrid, but the half-giant was also a hero of the war and had finally been allowed to purchase a new wand. Adrian had already expressed having a soft spot for the former gamekeeper.
She stood before him. "Will you be back before term starts?"
"It's not likely. I will send you an owl when I know more."
"All right. I'll see you later." She paused a moment before embracing him.
He had the distinct impression that she either wanted to say more or expected him to say something. "Take care of yourself," he said and then leaned down to kiss her before departing.
**********
Aurelia had tried not to let his abrupt departure bother her. She had known that talking to him about her feelings would be difficult, but she had not realized how difficult it would be. Of course, it was not likely he had ever had that sort of discussion with anyone before. A part of her wished that she had been more direct, but she had always been taught that telling a man you love him first, especially if you weren't sure he returned that love, was not a good thing to do.
Thankfully, she had been busy over the last few days making sure the girls had everything ready for the start of term. There had been a shopping trip to London to replenish their supplies and to buy Helen new robes as she was outgrowing her old ones. The last Saturday of break, she sent them to the Parkers.
Since she had not received a message from Severus, she was beginning to wonder if he had realized what she was trying to discuss with him, and if it had scared him away. She thought about sending him an owl, but rationalized that would make her seem too pushy.
A knock at the door disturbed her from her thoughts. She wondered who would be coming to see her and felt her pulse race as she thought it might be Severus. Checking the peephole, she saw that it was Remus instead, and she opened the door. "Remus, what a surprise to see you here."
He returned her hug. "Well, with Severus at school, I thought this would be a good time to go over the Wolfsbane potion with you. We all know it will get busy once term starts."
"Of course." She led him to the library. "How's his research coming? He wouldn't really tell me anything about the case."
He answered evasively, "As well as can be expected. He's monitoring...the patient rather closely. Last I heard, it should be a full recovery."
"That's good." She sat at the desk and retrieved her research notes. After shuffling a few papers around, she pulled out a piece of parchment. "I think it will be easier for you just to write your answers. I'll go put the kettle on, and we can review them together."
As she collected the tea service, she assumed that Severus had been too busy to send her an owl. Since his birthday was Thursday, she decided she would contact him instead on Wednesday if she hadn't heard from him by then.
By the time the tea was ready and she returned to the library, Remus had finished answering her questions. They spent the next hour and a half reviewing them. "Hmm," she said as she considered the new data.
"Do you have any ideas?" Remus asked hopefully.
"A few. I need to do some research to decide which might be the most useful. The only problem is that if I choose the wrong track, your next transformation may be even more painful than the last."
He reached out and gripped her hand. "The pain will be worth it if it leads to a way to halt the transformation completely. I knew what I was getting into when I volunteered to be your test subject. I'll manage; I always do," he reassured her.
She tried to imagine how difficult it must be for him, and she was amazed that he could remain so good-natured through everything he had experienced in his life. "I just hate the prospect of causing you any more pain. I'm supposed to heal people, not make them suffer."
"And you will. I know the original potion took quite some time to perfect, and I imagine there were some rather unpleasant moments during initial testing."
She smiled weakly. "You're right; there were. Would you like more tea?" She realized the pot had long ago gone cold.
"Allow me." He picked up the tray and headed toward the kitchen. When he returned he poured for both of them.
They chatted pleasantly about their respective jobs. Remus regaled her with some amusing anecdotes about his students, including a few about Helen and Julia. She was surprised to learn that Helen had developed a bit of a smart mouth. He sheepishly admitted that he thought one of his coworkers, Kalliope Morris, was attracted to him.
"What's she like? The girls haven't told me too much about her," Aurelia asked, pleased that Remus might finally have found someone.
"She's quite pretty, so what she sees in me is anyone's guess." Aurelia gave him a disapproving look and he smiled slightly. "She's very talkative, but I think she's running out of things to say. It's not really as bad as it sounds. We had dinner together the other night, and it was quite pleasant. She can be a good listener, and I think she is starting to let me see who she really is. It's quite different from the persona she shows as a teacher. We'll see how it goes from here."
"I'm glad you've found someone else."
He laughed softly. "I'm not sure if I have, but we're going to move slowly since we do work together. I wouldn't want the situation to become awkward for either of us." Pausing, he took a sip of his tea before asking, "How are things with you and Severus?" he asked after several seconds of silence.
"Why do you ask?" she asked casually, not wanting to give away too much.
"Well... He's been a bit more cranky than usual. I was wondering if something happened between the two of you to sour the relationship."
She sighed and leaned back in her chair. "I wouldn't say anything happened to exactly sour it, but I'm not sure if it's moving forward anymore."
"Oh?"
"I know this isn't anything he's used to..." She realized that she was talking to a man about a romantic relationship with another man and was momentarily embarrassed. "Are all men so reluctant to share their emotions?"
"I can only speak for those I knew, but neither Sirius nor James was likely to tell a girl he loved her, if that's what you mean."
"That is what I mean. It's very important to me. I feel that I could make a life with Severus, but I'm not sure if he feels that way about me. I was trying to talk to him about it, but I fear I was being too circumspect, and then he was summoned back to Hogwarts."
"Well, if his behavior is any indication, I would say that he is quite smitten with you."
"Smitten and in love are two different things."
"You could just ask him."
"I know. That's what I should have done. So he really seems smitten with me?"
"Probably not the best word to use. He's definitely frustrated by something, and it's logical to assume that it's you."
"Then why hasn't he sent me an owl?" She was finding it difficult to hide her frustration. If Severus truly cared about her, he should have sent her even a short note.
"He's been very busy with his patient. He and Poppy have been working virtually around the clock."
"It's nothing contagious, is it?" She was concerned about her girls returning to Hogwarts if there was something dangerous there.
He chuckled. "No. It was an injury, not disease. The students are not in any danger.
"I should probably get going. I have a few preparations to make before the students return. Thank you for tea, and let me know if I can provide anything else."
"Thank you, Remus. I'll see you before full moon."
Once she was alone, she resolved that she would tell Severus how she felt when she met him for dinner for his birthday, assuming he could get the time away from the castle. It wouldn't do to wait, and talking with Remus had reassured her that Severus did feel something for her; he just might not recognize it as love.
***********
Severus scowled as he pored through yet more books in the library. After two days of searching, they had finally been able to capture the beast that had attacked Charlie Weasley. He was nearing the end of his second day of trying to determine what that thing was. Surely, this should convince the Headmaster that they should not protect Hagrid. No one knew where the former gamekeeper had gone. It seemed he and his brother had decided to go on some sort of holiday. At least Charlie was finally stable.
He shoved the book away, irritated by his latest failure, and rubbed the bridge of his nose. The headache that had been threatening for the better part of the day was about to manifest itself in full. He had too many thoughts occupying his mind. On top of trying to cure Charlie's poisoning, he found his mind kept returning to the conversation he and Aurelia had before he left. He still had no idea what she had been trying to discuss, and his mind kept trying to unravel that mystery. Someone sat across from him at the table, and he was about to lash out at the intruder when he realized that it was his mother. "What do you want?" he asked in an irritated voice.
"I thought you might like some tea, or perhaps something stronger. It's nearly closing and you've run all the students out."
He picked up another book. "Your concern is overwhelming, but that won't be necessary."
She reached over and shut the book. "Yes, it will. Something is bothering you. I can tell you aren't giving your full attention to Charlie." Standing up, she glared at him until he did likewise, and she led him into her office. "Now, will it be tea or something stronger?"
He flopped into the chair. "Something stronger."
She handed him a glass and pulled the second chair closer to his. "What's bothering you? Does it have something to do with Aurelia?"
Swirling the liquid in the glass, he took a few seconds to compose his thoughts. "Of course it does. Women are so damned confusing." He sounded less angry and more exasperated. "Right before I was summoned here, she was trying to have some sort of conversation with me, only I have no idea what the subject was. Why can't women ever come out and ask a straight question?"
Eileen looked intrigued. "What was she saying?"
He took a long drink of the amber liquid, not sure how to discuss this with his mother. "I was attempting...to have an intimate moment with her, when she pulled away and started talking about how well we knew each other, but that there were still things we needed to discuss. Things she seemed to feel were very important." He saw the broad grin spread across his mother's face and replied with a deep scowl. "What is that look for?"
She reached over and grabbed his hands, tears glistening in her eyes. "Oh, Severus!"
Now, he was convinced that all women were truly mad. Perhaps they were a different species. "What? Do you know what she was talking about?" He couldn't take much more of this, and if she didn't provide him with him with a straight answer, he would use Legilimency.
The tears spilled down Eileen's cheek, and she pulled Severus into an embrace. "Of course I do. She was trying to find out if you love her."
He stiffened. "If I love her?"
Releasing him from her arms, she asked, "Do you?"
He opened his mouth to answer and promptly closed it, unsure of his answer. "What difference does it make?" he snarled.
Eileen sighed. "A great deal. Love is a very important emotion. She wants to make sure that what you feel for each other is not simply lust."
"She should know the answer to that by now." Severus Snape was not the sort of man who freely discussed his emotions.
"Well, if you want your relationship to progress, you are actually going to have to tell her, confirm her theory."
Draining his glass, he stood to leave. "Women are highly illogical."
Smiling smugly, she replied, "Yes, we are. Tell her what you feel. She loves you and accepts you for who you are. Don't be afraid of her."
"Who are you to be giving me advice about love? I don't recall it playing a part in your marriage. And who says that is what I'm looking for?"
She tried to hide the hurt caused by his verbal barb. "The absence of a thing can make a person appreciate it that much more. Besides, have I not always loved you?"
He found he couldn't deny this. During his childhood, his mother had tried to protect him, shield him from his father's rages. After all, love was the reason he had hidden her from the Dark Lord.
"Severus, you are not your father's son, you are my son. Perhaps I could have done better, tried harder to protect you, but I did the best I could. As much as you may not agree, I needed your father."
Hearing the sorrow in his mother's voice, he felt slightly guilty about how had been treating her. He wanted to say something, but had no idea what it should be.
"You are your own man. Your life was shaped by your experiences. There is no reason you have to be your father. Don't be afraid of this," she said gently.
"I am afraid of nothing." He left, stopping only to retrieve the latest book he had been trying to read before heading down to his dungeons.
A while later, still failing to concentrate on that book, he decided that he might as well at least get some sleep. Unfortunately, that too eluded him. His mind kept returning to the conversation with his mother. Was it that important that she hear him utter words he had only told his mother as a young boy? His years as a Death Eater had taught him to suppress emotions, that they could be used against you. Most especially love. How many of his brethren had been coerced because of their love for another. But the Dark Lord was gone. There was no one to threaten her.
**********
Term started without him having found the time to see Aurelia. On his list of things to do was to send her a message, but he wanted to be able to tell her when he would see her again. None of what he wanted to say to her could be put in a letter.
On Wednesday morning, an owl swooped down and landed directly in front of him. Recognizing her handwriting on the envelope, he resisted the urge to tear into it. It wouldn't do to draw attention. Unfolding the letter slowly and carefully, he was surprised by what he read.
Dearest Severus,
I hope all is well and that the case has not proven too difficult. If you need any help, I can be quite discreet in making a visit to Hogwarts. I know that you didn't want St. Mungo's involved, so I am prepared to take a sick day.
Whether or not you accept my help, I would like to invite you to dinner tomorrow. I've arranged a private dining room with Madam Rosmerta. I know you are a private man and would not like anyone to know it's your birthday. Even if it's only for an hour, though I would prefer for longer, I would like to see you again. We parted on such rushed terms, and so much was left unsaid. I apologize for my cryptic conversation. I fear it may have left you unnecessarily worried.
Affectionately yours,
Aurelia
He was momentarily surprised that she knew when his birthday was, but he reasoned that she did have access to his medical records. Deciding he would join her for dinner, he penned a quick response and sent the owl on its way. Even though Charlie was not yet fully recovered, it felt as though a great weight had been lifted.
The following night, he arrived at the Three Broomsticks, and Rosmerta grinned broadly while ushering him to the private dining room. He was surprised to see he was the first to arrive, but not surprised to see a small table set for two and dim, romantic lighting. There was a music box playing what he assumed was romantic music in the corner and a small settee in front of the raging fire.
"I'll have dinner sent up shortly after Aurelia arrives." Rosmerta gave him one last grin before departing the room.
Glancing around the room, Severus was reminded of a cover from one of the romance novels he kept confiscating from the older girls. Helping himself to a drink, he took a seat on the settee.
After half an hour, he began to worry. Aurelia had been late before, but it had only been a few minutes. And she knew that his time was precious.
Another half an hour later, he was truly concerned. If Aurelia had sent an owl, Rosmerta would certainly have let him know. Deciding to investigate, he headed downstairs. No, Rosmerta had not received a message. He left without saying anything else and Apparated directly to her house. It was deserted and did not look like anyone had been there all day. The hair on the back of his neck was now standing up. However, the wards had not been disturbed, and there was no sign of struggle.
Perhaps she was delayed at work, he thought. Apparating to St. Mungo's, he hurried to her ward on the third floor. Composing himself before walking through the door, he took a series of deep breaths. He saw Johnson sitting at the desk at the far end of the ward. "Miss Johnson, have you seen Healer MacLean?"
"Not since yesterday, Professor. She took the day off."
Fighting down the sense of panic, he asked, "Is she ill?"
"She didn't say. Why?"
"No reason." Without another word, he swept out of the ward. It was odd that she would invite him to dinner, take the day off from work and then not show up. Deciding that he had perhaps missed something at her house, he decided to return and investigate further. After that, he would return to Hogwarts and see if she sent him a letter explaining her absence.
A/N: Once again, this chapter would not be what it is without the amazing help of Zen Lady and nota, who are always more than happy to let me know I'm not making sense again. They also let me know when I don't give enough detail, or, on rare occasion, give too much.
I know you will all be asking me why Aurelia didn't show up for dinner, and I ask you to be patient. I am working on the next chapter. I will give a warning that it may take a while. I'm trying not to make it too busy. It may end up being a shorter one to make up for the fact this is a longer one.
As always, all reviews are greatly appreciated.
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Latest 25 Reviews for Beholden To No Man
20 Reviews | 6.25/10 Average
Great read, I'm not usually too intrested in stories with origional characters, but yours were well developed and rounded. Thank you. :)
I am intrigued, so far so good. Well done!
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
Thank you. I'm glad that you have enjoyed it. I always appreciate it when folks tell me they have enjoyed my work, even if it takes me a long time to reply sometimes.
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
Thank you. I'm glad that you have enjoyed it. I always appreciate it when folks tell me they have enjoyed my work, even if it takes me a long time to reply sometimes.
blimey that was a twist and a half. will keep reading, great story
xx
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
Thanks. That was one of my favorite scenes in the whole story. I just really couldn't resist. I think it a lot that so long after I wrote the story I knew exactly what you were talking about. LOL
Yes, the girls behaved just as I thought they would, Helen was pleased as punch and Julia was a typical difficult teenager. The only thing more difficult than a sulking sixteen year old is a sulking fifteen year old, so it could have been worse.It looks like politics and criminal justice in the wizarding world are no different that they are in the Muggle world. I hadn't even thought of a plea bargain, but it's so typical of Lucius.Things are winding down, but don't end the story until the baby is born, she finally has the right formula for Remus ( it looks like she's super close now), Julia finally comes round, and most of all what is brewing between Eileen and Adrian.I think they would make a great couple, and Adrian is even more fatherly towards him than Dumbledore was. Another plus is that Adrian is much lees manipulative than DD was. You hint that Adrian has a great sorrow in his past, will we find out what it is?
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
Thanks. I had a lot of fun with the different responses. After all, they are different people. Teenagers in general can be incredibly exasperating and Julia definitely fills this role.
Politics, what can I say? It doesn't seem to change no matter where you are. And we already know that Lucius has taken advantage of having money in the past.
Yup, the story is winding down. Probably one more chapter to wrap this installment all up. As for Eileen and Adrian, I am working on a story that is a companion piece to this one that will explore some events from her point of view and provide more backstory to what's going on at Hogwarts and about those two characters. :) And yes, Adrian is definitely less manipulative, something I'm sure Severus is happy for.
I love the twist at the end! Eileen /Elaine was right and now he is forced to make a decision. I'm betting on marriage. I bet Eileen/Elaine will be thrilled to find out she's going to be a grandmother.it really shouldn't be a hard choice for him, he wants her there with him. After her materninty leave there should be plenty of house elves who would volunteer to do day care and she could commute by Floo or apparate back and forth to work every day. The baby would also have it's sisters and grandmother nearby and they would be a complete family unit. This story must be nearing it's conclusion, is there any way I could once again inspire you to write another sequel? I will miss Aurealia, her girls and the new character you added to this story, Eileen. I know Severus would never be a Mr. Chips, but how about Powlett-Jones from Delderfield's To Serve Them All My Days? That would take him into the Headmastership and then to retirement.Since this update hasn't shown up on the site where I usually read it, I decided not to wait, to read and review it here.
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
Thanks for the head's up on the Elaine/Eileen. I felt like such an idiot. And neither or my betas caught it either. LOL We all saw what we wanted to see.
As for house elves, I think that would be a wonderful thing to have when dealing with an infant. LOL I think that Severus will realize what a good thing he has and be bright about making choices.
For a sequel, I am working out some plot ideas. It will be set a bit in the future, probably around 15-17 years. We'll see how it works out. I need to see if I can write something that will cover some key points of the intermediary years without getting bogged down.
Response from Trickie Woo (Reviewer)
I'm a really good proof reader, not much gets by me. I caught a real zinger in the Wayside Gardens newsletter this week. They sent the email on June 14 advertising a buy 3 get 2 free sale on roses (shipped bare roots); at the top of the page were 2 pictures, one of a rose bush in full bloom and beside it a picture of the plant with bare roots the way it would arrive at your address. The picture of the bare roots rose said this picture taken June 16, 2006. I sent them back an email asking how they got a picture from the future because I'd love to have a camera like that. My email was sent June 14, 2006 at 11:13 PM. I got a reply from them today thanking me for pointing out the error. It was easy to see how Eileen became mixed up with Elaine, it's easy to overlook when the lettering sequence is so similar. But the date on that picture in the newsletter should have stuck out like a sore thumb.
Oh, my! I was not expecting that one! Wow! Wonderful job. I really can't wait to see how Severus reacts to this. This story has me captivated. Thank you so much for sharing. I can't want for the next update. :)
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
LOL I don't think Severus was expecting it, either. Oh, how horribly he's likely to take this news. I love the little evil cliffhangers and this was a really good one form my standpoint. I am in the final revision phase of the next chapter and have even started on 14.
Hopefully, his reaction won't disappoint. I know I had fun imagining it.
How wonderful to find this updated! Must I hunt down and kill the plot bunnies attacking you or at least trap and release them later. So much is happening in this chapter - your unhurried pacing and attention to detail almost obscures that! Beautifully written as always!
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
Thank you very much, kari. Especially for the help on trapping the offending plot bunnies. I'm having a hard time picking a project to settle on right now. I need to whip them into shape. On the upside, I did have a huge brainstorn on the next chapter and I think it will be a wonderful twist.
Well done. Her anxiety is so believable and just when Severus is becomming courageous. Remus' timing is doing nothing to endear himself to Severus! Remus is the one I'm worried about falling into the love the doctor syndrome... Looking forward to more!
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
Thank you very much, kari. This is a scary time for Aurelia. Remus is such a sweetheart and I have a soft spot for him. Fortunately for Severus, Aurelia only sees Remus as a friend, though as you said, Remus should be careful not to get too attached to her.
“Contrary to popular belief, the world does not revolve around you.” Well said! Coded banging? Is Remus just changed enough to be wily and deadly? Thank goodness the next chapter is posted!!
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
I completely loved that line. Once I had it come to me, I knew I had to make sure to leave it in. Yes, you did get lucky that the next chapter is up.
What with her nervousness and mourning and his awkwardness and insecurities, you'll need all your skill to get them together.
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
Yes, it will take a lot of skill won't it? Hopefully everyone will show the right amount of patience. :)
Feel sorry for the girls it must be hard to pull back from their previous relationship with Severus.The story has flowed nicely into the sequel. Once more I am going to enjoy the promise and a brilliant story to read. Best wishes
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
THanks,
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
. It will be tough for everyone to adjust, but I think they will. I hope you enjoy the rest of the story. Some chapters are proving more difficult than others to write. *sigh*
I've enjoyed this story and its predecessor very much. Aurelia and her daughters are very satisfying OCs. Part of me wanted some sort of an epilogue but I think that's more a harking back to storytelling convention -- really, it ends very nicely.
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
Thank you very much. :) There are times I do epilogues and times I don't. It really depends on how I think the story ends. Here, I thought it ended nicely. I do hope to revisit these characters in another future set fic once I knock out some other projects. :)
I hate to see the story end, is there any chance of inspiring you once more to continue with Severus, Aurelia and their children? Maybe a series of one shots as they grow up. I'd like to know if the have anymore children and what happens with Helen and Julia after they graduate; and maybe something about Marcus and his school days.I read and reviewed After the Awakening. Are you taking that beyond that day in the staff room when Eileen revealed her secret? If you do, then I hope there will be more of Severus & Aurelia in it. Eileen is Marcus's grandmother so it would fit in very naturally. I suspect there is something going on with Eileen and Adrian, but I don't think Severus would act in the bratty way that Julia did. I think he has matured emotionally now that he is a husband, father, and stepfather. Those hormonal mood swings taught him a lot of patience and diplomacy and he now seems to be a full fledged adult. Now about the baby'e name, I understand where the Aurelius came from, but if there was anything earlier in the story about the name Marcus I can't remember it. So where does the Marcus come from?
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
I have 3 other WIPs and a couple of one-shots I would like to pursue, but time permitting, I would like to revisit this view of the HP universe. :D
After the Awakening will probably be 4-5 chapters (I have to laugh at that since every other estimate I have made has turned out to be horribly off). I do think Severus would definitely be more mature than Julia. After all, he still feels some residual guilt over her situation. And this whole experience has definitely matured him.
Marcus Aurelius was the last of the great Roman emporers and philosophers. When he died, so did the Pax Romana, or so they say. While the movie Gladiator is not completely accurate, there is some truth, That was just happy fortune that Aurelius/Aurelia are fairly common names. Her name is the same as the mother of Julius Ceasar's mother.
Response from Trickie Woo (Reviewer)
I was looking at the family tree of Caesar Augustus's family Sunday night. I had come across something about Caligula and wanted to check it out.I loved 'I, Claudius' and it was on a web site about that mini series that I found the family trees. they were well documented and went into great detail. What little history of the Roman empire I learned about in school came from my 2 years of Latin in high school. I learned more from Robert Graves' books than from school.When we were on a Parish Holiday in Kent just west of Sandwich the first place they took us was Richborough Castle where the Roman occupying forces first landed in 43 AD and remained as their main port of entry during the occupation. In an area filled with history and many, many interesting places to see that turned out to be my favorite.I haven't been to Italy yet, but someday I'll get there and see the remnants of the Empire as well as the other place I have a strong desire to visit, Tuscany.
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
I had two years of Latin and then as one of my required humanities courses in college I took Roman History. Michael Grant's History of Rome is a great book on Roman history. While I've been to Italy, I never had near enough time. I had but one day in Rome, which is a travesty. I could spend weeks there. I love ancient Rome and Greece and hope to spend more time studying that area.
He's learning fast how volatile pregnant women can be, after the baby is born the experience will make it much easier to deal with PMS. He's learning the magic words are yes dear, I was wrong, and I was selfish. He hasn't yet learned my favorites though, I brought you chocolate, have some chocolate, and would you like to go out and get some chocolate. When I was pregnant with my son my morning sickness was 24/7 for the first 5 months, the only thing I could eat that would stay down was chocolate. It's funny, isn't it how you can get sick of eating almost anything, but chocolate never loses it's taste or appeal. I lost 30 lbs. during those 5 months and when he was born I weighed the same as I did when I got pregnant. When I left the hospital I weighed just a little more (15 lbs.) than I wanted to weigh.His adjustment to marriage would have been easier if they had time for a shakedown cruise before she got pregnant, but that can't be helped. Besides, if it hadn't happened they wouldn't be married yet. He would still be courting her and getting up the nerve to propose.I had thought about asking you to have Eileen talk to Julia, but no one but Severus, Aurelia and possibly Adrian knows who she really is, do they? Or is her identity common knowledge since the wedding when she was so obviously close to both of them. Maybe Severus could talk to her, he has around 25 years of experience in dealing with petulant (I had to ge that word in there) adolescents and it's not him, personally, that bothers her. Although he was never known for tact and diplomacy in dealing with any of them. But he always did take his responsibility to the Slytherins very seriously and took good care of them. Julia has to come round sooner or later, maybe it will be the new baby that will draw her in towards her mother.
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
LOL yes, poor Severus really has a steep learning curve here when it comes to women, doesn't he? He's not exactly starting it at the most advantageous point, but he is learning. Personally, I couldn't imagine losing 30 lbs over that short a time, it must have been miserable for you.
At this point, I would actually have to look it up. I can't recall if anything wsa mentioned at the wedding or not to the girls. I don't think they do know. As for the petulant teenager, you have read the next chapter, so you know what happens. :D
I'm going to try again, I hope the whole shebang doesn't collapse when I try to post it this time.It was amazing how far he managed to regress in his emotional development at the beginning of the chapter. It was as if he took 10 steps backward for every step he had advanced before. It just goes to show that every boy can benefit from a good chewing out from his mother. And when he actually listened to her, look what it got him, make up sex and that's always the best kind. Plus he got a fiancee, a wedding to plan, a baby to get ready for, and she told him she would come to Hogwarts to live with him. Maybe the chapter should be titled 'Mother Knows Best'.I have one small worry, how will Julia respond to her mother's news when she finds out about the baby? The first and second years at Hogwarts seem to be more innocent that Muggle children. Helen probably doesn't know the mechanics of sex, or of pregnancy, or the signifigance of counting to nine. Since she already tried to set them up she will be pleased at the news. Julia is past that stage and at the age when teenagers think they are much smarter that any adult. She will probably be highly embarrassed at the thought of her mother having sex and even more embarassed and highly outraged that her mother became pregnant out of wedlock. The wizarding world can be very judgemental and moralistic, so I can just imagine the reaction of a teenager from that background to her mother's news.
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
Thank you very much for your wonderful review, especially since you got hit by the database hiccup (I try to copy all long replies before submitting, but I still forget LOL)
Severus did take a big step(s) back, didn't he? Fear can do some amazing things to you, can't it? You know what, 'Mother Knows Best' would make a great title for this one. LOL If only he'd listened to her sooner.
I have been working on the next chapter and you will see reactions. This next chapter, for various reasons, has been one of the harder I've had to write. I won't say anymore for risk of ruining the surprise. :)
Hooray for this update! Now there's a sign of true love, Severus taking Harry along. Aurelia's captivity was very believable, espcially her alternating thoughts of capitulation, rescue and strength.
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
Thanks, kari. LOL Working with Harry would be a sign of true love, wouldn't it. LOL I'm glad you found her captivity believable. It's always a hard thing to do. In this case moreso since Aurelia isn't as much like me as some of my other OCs have been. I'm just glad that her captivity is over.
I'm thrilled to find an update to your wonderful story. I jealously watched as your other stories were updated here on PP... finally, this one :) Quite a cliffhanger, I'm hoping this has nothing to do with Malfoy. Anxiously awaiting the next chapter!
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
Thanks, kari. As for the other one getting updates, it's been done for a while now, I'm just catching up on posting here.
As for why Aurelia didn't make dinner, that will be revealed in the next chapter. Patience, my friend.
Well, there are indeed a few twists here! It would have seemed more natural to me to have Elaine's awakening back story. It felt too rushed here, what with the new job, identity and face. But it is nice that he will have someone with his best interests at heart to talk to. And I like the clever idea of hiding someone in Hogwarts as a new staff member. I don't think I've seen that done before. Also, how ironic and fun that Adrian would leave her door open for Severus!
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
In hindsight more backstory would be good. I might be convinced to do a little filler fic for this when I finish one of my projects. I wanted this story to focus on the story of Severus and Aurelia. I have to thank one of my betas of another story for that twist, though I wish I could take credit for that. I'm glad you are enjoying this. :)
You've doen an excellent job of capturing Severus' paranoia and awkwardness.
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
Thanks, kari. Severus is a lot of fun to work with and I really have to thank Zen Lady for keeping me straight when I try to take him too far of his course. I hope you enjoy the rest of the story.
I'm so glad to find this sequel up so quickly. Helen a Slytherin, lol. I'm enjoying this more mature look at what happens after the war. In many ways harder to write I think...
Response from phoenix (Author of Beholden To No Man)
Thanks, kari. You got lucky on this. I actually started posting Wounded becasue I knew this sequel was getting ready for posting. You will see more about Helen and her Slytherin stripes in the future. :) The hardest part about this one was that I killed off so many from the pervious world and the rebuilding involved quite a bit of creation on my part, though that was fun. I hope you enjoy the rest of it.