Chapter 3
Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection
Chapter 3 of 5
magalenaA long drabble series written for the SeverusBigBangBirthdayBash. Severus Snape has lived in seclusion for the past twenty years, separate from the rest of the Wizarding world, in self imposed isolation. Now, he's been tracked down by Hermione Granger with a message and request from an old colleague.
ReviewedAN: Written for the SeverusBigBangBirthdayBash (Jan. 9, 2010). Many, many thanks to my betas, Alley B and sweettiff_14.
Disclaimer: I do not own HP. It all belongs to JKR. I make no money here.
from chapter 2:
My dear Severus,
If you are reading this, I am dead.
~*~
But, if you are reading this, then I know that entrusting its delivery to Hermione was the right choice. The girl is like a dog with a bone when given an assignment; she doesn't stop until it's complete.
He chuckled at her words.
As you've probably already realized, I've been desperately trying to reach you to make amends. I've many things I wish I could say to you, dear boy, apologies I wish I could make. But alas, one cannot change the past. If it were possible, please believe that I would move heaven and earth to make it so.
The first thing I need you to know is I had absolutely no idea the things Albus asked of you. He had no right, Severus. I was furious with him when I learned what he'd expected, of both you and Harry, “for the greater good.”
Voldemort was vanquished in the end, but I can't help but wonder, if Albus had allowed us more input into his planning, we might have been able to accomplish the same goals without the sacrifices you were forced to endure. But then Albus was always the great manipulator, as you know better than anyone.
Secondly, I am heartsick over my own treatment of you during your tenure as Headmaster. I could excuse it by saying, at the time, I truly believed you had betrayed us all to Voldermort. And I did believe that.
But I should have known, Severus... I should have realized. I want you to know now that there were others who did question your actions. Hermione for one, and Hagrid, Remus Lupin, Arthur Weasley—they all adamantly expressed doubts and disbelief regarding your apparent betrayal of The Order and Dumbledore, but the rest of us refused to listen to their protests.
This, is my biggest regret, Severus, not that I treated you abominably, although I did. But that somehow, I couldn't even see the possibility that it was all a ruse. That you were still playing the role you had so painstakingly created, the role you and Albus had so carefully honed.
I, who thought I knew you better than anyone else at Hogwarts, I who thought of you as a true friend, a trusted colleague, in fact, like a son. It should have been me expressing those doubts, endorsing you, defending you. Instead I abandoned you, treated you like scum.
For this more than anything else in my life, I am most heartily sorry and I beg your forgiveness, Severus. If you grant me this, I will be able to rest in peace.
Had my health been better, I wouldn't have settled for sending owls to contact you, but would have come myself. It was not until the end, the last few months, that I was willing to enlist Hermione's assistance in completing this for me. If I'd recruited her help earlier, perhaps I could have finished this in person. But, as I stated previously, we cannot change the past.
I know you, and you are now berating yourself. I beseech you, do not. Do not dwell on our estrangement, but instead learn from our mistakes.
I know you've isolated yourself from us, from our world, and have lived alone these many years. I ask this of you now, please, consider returning. Much has changed in those years, but not so much that we couldn't use a good wizard, a strong wizard, at the helm of Hogwarts. That wizard is you, Severus. You have been Headmaster, albeit in bad times. You are needed here. Please come home, home to Hogwarts.
Hermione is aware of the dilemma which my death will activate. She will explain it all to you in detail.
For this too I apologize. I feel a bit like Albus now, manipulating you into situations against your will. That was never my intention; however, at this point I feel I have little choice. Of course you may refuse, as is your prerogative, and there is little that can be done if that is the case. Just consider it for a bit, if you will. That is all I can ask.
With all of my heart,
Love,
Your Friend,
Minerva
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Latest 25 Reviews for Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection
27 Reviews | 7.0/10 Average
A bit rushed to me (they didn't know each other well for seven years of school, not at all for the next twenty, then are suddenly kissing and more), but otherwise i liked it. We all love to hate Umbridge i think, so sticking it to her is always great.
wow.... i love that draco, blaise and luna pairing! do you know of any stories with them? :) also, your long drabble is really very good! u're also very very good with evil cliffies.
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
LOL! I've been told that before about the cliffie thing. I do like the DM/LL/BZ pairing but I can't think of any fics off hand with them but there are problably some somewhere.
fabulous!! the umbitch never did get her just desserts...another bone i have to pick with jkr!! thanks so much and mega smoochies
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
Smoochies right back at ya'! So glad you liked it. :)
:) Lovely story. I was thinking maybe you'd bring up the point about the castle actually rejecting umbridge and not rejecting Snape. Not that such evidence was needed but it would be one more thing to shove in Umbridge's face.Oh btw, went to see the HP Exhibition in Boston about 2 weeks ago and got to see TWO umbridge costumes up close. They made me laugh and laugh.
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
Oooh, that would have been a great point to make, I wish I would have thought of it! Thanks so much for reading and leaving feedback.
Wonderful story, I especially loved Neville as Minister, that Luna had two great men, Umbrigdes downfall and most of all a happy ending for Hermione and Severus! Very well done.
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
Thanks so much, I'm a happy endings kind of girl. :)Glad you enjoyed thanks for the comments.
Neville as MoM? What a cool idea! I really like this. Will you have more chapters coming?
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
I think Neville would make an admirable MoM. He is one of my favorite characters of all. :) And no, sorry this is the end, I just had to go back in and mark it completed. I'm so glad you liked it. :)
Excellent, I'm glad he is going to be the Headmaster again. I don't want that horrible toad back in that school.
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
Oh definitely, no Umbridges allowed. LOL
Oh, good God!!!I shudder to think what horrors will be visited upon Hogwarts should Umbridge manage to ooze her way back into the Headmistress' office. No doubt she already has sweeping changes planned for the school already. So I imagine that dear Dolores and her followers will hardly be pleased to discover that Severus has survived and that he is willing to take his former position.But as both she and Severus are viable candidates for the office, I'm assuming the current Board of Governors will have to choose between them? This is really quite a clever and original premise... I'm definitely looking forward to reading more of this story. :)
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
Thanks so much, I'm glad you're liking it. Yes, I'm sure Severus will come as quite a surprise to Dolores! *Evil grin*
May the Force go with you, Sev. :)
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
For sure!!;-)
Aww, nice letter. :)
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
thanks! :)
How heartbreaking! Minerva should have lived a rich, full life... for her to die at 93 is far too young for a powerful witch like her. No wonder that Severus felt he could hold off awhile longer, and how like him to punish himself for his grievous error.As for Severus and Hermione, it's so lovely to see them meet as equals now, as two people with a great deal in common, without a teacher-student barrier and the distance that Severus' role of Order spy necessitated between them. I can't wait to see how things unfold between them. :)
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
I know its so true and yet I couldn't help but laugh a little at Severus line, "... she was only 93." (Thinking from a Muggle POV) :)I feel bad that they never reconciled, it's too bad really. But maybe this will be what brings him back to Wizarding world after all these years in self imposed exhile.
I love how Hermione's persistence slowly wore Severus down, and how they became increasingly familiar with each letter. From downright hostile (on his part) to quite welcoming and affectionate at the end.Well done!
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
Thanks so much for reading and reviewing. That's exactly what I wanted to portray, the gradual increase of understanding and affection between them.
I was crying as Severus read his letter from Minerva. In fact, I still am. How sad that the costs of Albus' countless years of manipulations are still being tallied, even decades after his death.Poor Minerva... may she rest in peace. But I can't help but wonder about the situation that she referred to and what it means for Severus and Hermione both. Really excellent writing... this is definitely being added to my favorites. :)
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
Well, thank you so much for the lovely review, it really made my day!:) (Sorry to make you cry but secretly pleased that my little tale could evoke such emotion.) Yes, Albus machinations did have far reaching effects. Very sad indeed. And yes, there is a situation brewing that needs Severus assistance, hopefully he will cooperate! Thanks again for the nice review.
Well now the ball is in Severus court. Great chapter, look forward to more.
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
Yes, it is. Thanks for reading and commenting. :)
Goodness what a heart wrenching chapter.
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
Yes, very sad indeed. Thanks so much for reading and commenting.
I'm with Severus - he IS a bastard for going 20 years refusing to open a simple letter. That's our Severus! I hope he feels guilty for quite a while.Can't wait to hear with Minerva has to say. (And, no, I haven't forgiven her either for her behavior in that horrible year Severus was headmaster.)
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
Thanks for commenting. :)I know he was wrong, but it happens. He really did plan eventually to make up with Minerva, he didn't expect her to die so young. (she was only 93, he didn't know she was ill, he figured she had another 50 ro 60 years yet! LOL) I compare it to families who have a disagreement, before you know it years go by and the brothers, sisters, parent/child, or whatever haven't spoken to each other. I've seen it happen.
Great so far, looking forward to more. Thanks for writing!
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
So glad you are enjoying. Thanks much!
Anonymous
*sniffle* That was sad. Oh dear... poor Severus. He will have a bad time over this, I'm sure.
Author's Response: He will, but Hermone is there to lend support.
That was a surprise! :)
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
Oh good, I;m glad I was able to surprise you. :) heehee
Nice progression. :)
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
Thanks! :)
Oh no. How sad. Poor Severus.
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
I know it is isn't it. I liken it to family who have a falling out and suddenly its 20 years later and they still haven't spoken. So sad!
I like it very much :) Five starts all around
Response from Marty21 (Reviewer)
I meant five stars my fingers got ahead of my brain lol
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
LOL my fingers do that all the time when I'm typing!So glad you're liking my little story! More to come soon.
I liked this, and I am very much looking forward to read more, not at least learn what Hermione has for Severus.
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
Thanks! More coming soon! ;-)
LOL. I love it. PLEASE continue. I want to know what the thing is!
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
*grins* All will be revealed. Glad you love it!
Is there another chapter coming? Hope... hope... hope... Don't leave us hanging like this. ^_^
Response from magalena (Author of Regrets, Remorse and Resurrection)
Not to worry, the next chapter is in the queue. This story is complete, written for the SeverusBigBangBirthdayBash 1/9/10 in honor of SS's 50th birthday. 100x 48 but I am posting it in segments, probably about 5 chapter in all. Glad you're enjoing. :)