Awakening

The black smoke surrounded Severus. He could neither see nor feel anything. Terror filled his heart as he realized he'd been judged and found unworthy. He groped about, trying to escape the darkness, but he was lost... utterly lost.

Despite being unable to see, he instinctively felt the smoke gathering tighter around him. It filled his nostrils and surrounded his body. It pressed upon him.

"Please!" he screamed. "Please, just give me another chance!"

The smoke continued to squeeze him. He felt it surround his neck and cut off his breathing. This was it, then... the end. He would be banished to a painting in an unknown corridor for eternity.

The darkness surrounding him began to come alive with little flashes of light. He gasped for breath, as his airway was constricted by the smoke. Blackness filled his mind....

Severus' eyes snapped open, and he coughed harshly. Looking around, he saw that he was in his bed, tangled horribly in his sheets. They curled around his neck tightly, practically strangling him. He turned and twisted until he was free. Staring at the bed, he struggled to catch his breath. He reached up to smooth his hair out of his eyes and realized there was something atop his head.

Grasping it, he brought it in front of his face. He stared in shock at the red Santa hat that Voldemort had carted around with him on their journey. The reality of what lay in his hand hit him like a slap in the face. He grasped the Santa hat and hugged it to his chest.

"Oh! I'm alive! They... they've given me another chance! I'm alive! I'm alive!"

He ran to his bathroom and looked into the mirror. His severe face stared back at him. Yes, he was definitely still alive. The smile that sprung onto his lips totally changed his appearance.

"Hmm," he mused as he looked at himself smiling. "I'll have to do that more often."

He strolled back out of the bathroom and noticed the single present that sat at the edge of his bed. Minerva always gave him a gift, despite the fact that she never received one in return. His eyes widened when he saw it.

"Christmas. Oh, Merlin, Christmas! I hope I haven't missed it!" He went to his bedside and checked his clock.

"Eight am. Well, that tells me nothing. Winky?"

The House-elf appeared with a pop. "You's wants something, Master Snape?"

"What day is it, Winky?" he asked.

The elf looked to him like he had a horn growing out of his head.

"It's Christmas, of course, sir."

Severus bounded up to her and scooped her into his arms.

"Splendid!" he cried. "I haven't missed it!" He spun her around, then set her back on the ground. She swayed a bit with the force of his motions, but the frightened look on her face made Severus laugh. That only caused the elf to begin to look terrorized.

"Winky thinks you need strong medicine, sir. Winky thinks you've gone mad!"

"Nonsense!" Severus straightened and gave Winky the dour scowl that usually adorned his face.

"That's better, sir," Winky remarked.

"Is there something wrong with being happy on Christmas?" Severus demanded.

Winky shook her head. "Not for everyone else, sir, but Winky thinks you is not the type to be happy on any day... sir."

Severus smirked at her. "Well, you're wrong." His smirk turned practically diabolical as he scooped her up once again and spun her around. This, of course, caused Winky to yelp and Disapparate as soon as he'd set her down again. He laughed aloud at her abrupt departure.

Becoming serious, a glint shone in his eyes. "I'm alive... and it's Christmas morning... and I've been given a second chance at life...."

He had much to do. Dressing quickly, he ran to his lab. He needed to work quickly if he was to accomplish everything he hoped.

Severus pulled a large Potions tome from his bookshelf. He flipped through the pages quickly, coming to the formula he was looking for. Running his hand down the ingredient list, he was relieved to find he had everything right in his stores. He rushed to gather it all and began to brew.

He knocked on the door of the humble town home. Katie Bell answered and looked startled to see her former Potions professor standing on their front stoop.

"Professor Snape?" She blatantly gaped at his smiling face.

"Miss Bell, Merry Christmas. Might I come in?"

She backed away in confusion but had the temerity to motion for him to enter.

"Are your parents at home?"

She nodded absently, all the time eyeing him. Turning, she called to her parents, who came bustling out of the kitchen with smiles on their faces. The smiles turned to looks of dread as they noted just who was in their doorway.

Mr. Bell was the first to recover. He extended his hand in welcome to Severus, who accepted it and pumped it up and down vigorously.

Merry Christmas, sir," Severus said. "I'm sorry to bother you, but I have something you may find useful."

"Come in, come in," Mrs. Bell said as she remembered herself and her manners. "Have a seat!" She motioned him to the sofa.

He sat, and the family, minus Tim, gathered around him.

"It has come to my attention that young Tim has a rare condition that causes him to have seizures," Severus began.

All three Bells nodded their heads. Severus reached into his pocket and removed a large bottle.

"I have brewed this for him."

At Mrs. Bell's gasp, he held up his hand.

"It is not a cure. I am not quite that talented with a cauldron, given such short notice, but it will relieve and prevent Timothy's symptoms while I try to find a true cure."

Katie Bell's mouth dropped open while Mr. Bell just stared at the bottle incredulously, but Timothy's mother jumped from her seat and threw her arms around Severus.

"Oh! Professor! Thank you! Thank you!" She hugged him tightly.

Severus really didn't know what to do. This was the first time in his adult life that anyone had hugged him. He tentatively put his arms around her, the bottle still in his hand. He felt a warmth spread throughout his body. He could definitely get used to this.

Mrs. Bell pulled back and smoothed out her hair. "Thank you!" she cried again.

Severus handed her the bottle. "One teaspoon in the morning should control his seizures throughout the day."

Timothy's father stared at the bottle, his eyes tearing as he beheld the treasured gift. "You mean he'll be able to be like a normal child?" he asked in a raspy voice.

Severus nodded. "You should probably give him some straight away. It will help immediately."

Mrs. Bell disappeared for a few minutes. The other three just sat and looked at one another, not quite knowing what to say. They didn't need to wait long until the woman reappeared, followed closely by Timothy.

Severus smiled at him. Timothy stared, looking as if he was going to bolt back upstairs.

"My mum said you made that potion for me," the boy said.

Severus nodded. "I did. I was unaware of your condition until recently."

The boy nodded and smiled shyly. "Thank you, Professor." He stood looking at Severus with wide eyes. "Mum said you were going to look for a cure for my illness, too?"

Severus nodded again.

Growing bold, the boy looked to Severus curiously. "Why?"

Severus looked the lad up and down. "Because I think I can find it."

Timothy smiled. He ran to the kitchen and bounded back with a Christmas cookie shaped like a tree. "Merry Christmas, Professor Snape."

Severus took the cookie with a smile. "Merry Christmas to you, Timothy."

Severus stood in front of Hermione's door. The delivery of the potion had been the easy task of the day. Now, he needed to convince his Potions apprentice that not only was she a worthwhile person, but that he found her... attractive. He shifted from foot to foot, debating just when the perfect time to knock would be.

Rolling his eyes, he gathered his wits about him and knocked. It took a little while before the door opened. When it did, Hermione Granger, puffy-eyed and sniffing, stood before him. Her look of amazement at his appearance at her door made Severus want to chuckle, but he controlled himself.

Her appearance actually bothered him. He was originally going to pretend to be his dour, angry self, but he tossed out that idea when he saw she'd obviously been crying. His experiences the night before clued him in as to what the matter was about. He decided to play ignorant in any case.

"Hermione, might I come in?"

Her eyes grew even larger before she gathered her wits about her and stepped aside, motioning him in without a word.

After entering, he spun around. "Merry Christmas!" he said boisterously.

"Umm..." Hermione stared at him for a while. "Merry Christmas," she said without enthusiasm.

He led her to her sofa and sat down beside her.

"Hermione, I came by not just to wish you a Merry Christmas. I came by to apologize for my treatment of you... well... since the first day I met you, I guess."

Her mouth dropped open then, and she rubbed her eyes. She peeked out from behind her fists before rubbing them again. "You're still here," she muttered almost to herself. "I thought perhaps I'd fallen asleep by the fire."

He chuckled. "The most remarkable thing happened to me last night. Maybe I'll tell you the details someday, but suffice it to say, it has opened my eyes to my shortcomings." He grasped her hand within his. "I have treated you harshly, and it was without cause. I have been harder on you as my apprentice than necessary and have failed to advance you because of my sour disposition. I'm sorry for that."

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a scroll. He handed it to her. "I should have given this to you months ago, but I could never bring myself to admit that you've accomplished everything you need to."

Hermione reached out slowly and pulled the scroll from his hand. She unwrapped it and read it quickly. Her gaze shot from the parchment to him and back to the parchment again. She gave a strangled laugh.

"I don't believe it! You've passed me, and I'm a full-fledged Potions mistress? But, I thought I wouldn't finish until next spring!"

He arched an eyebrow at her. "A normal student wouldn't. You, however, are extraordinary in everything you touch. I cannot consciously hold you back any longer. Congratulations, and Merry Christmas."

Tears streamed from her already puffy eyes. She sniffed before she spoke again. "Thank you, Professor. You don't know what this means."

His hand came up to her cheek, and he wiped her tears away. "It's Severus..."

She looked to him cautiously.

"You were crying before I arrived. Why?"

"I was just... lonely."

"You have friends. Why not visit with them?"

She shrugged.

"Why have you stayed as my apprentice when I've been so terrible to you?"

"You weren't that bad," she remarked. Her hand reached out and grasped his.

"Yes, I was," he corrected.

"You're brilliant. Despite your personality, I wanted to learn from you. I respect you."

"Do you think more could come of that respect?" he asked quietly.

"What do you mean?"

His hand pulled out of hers, and he placed it at her neck, gently pulling her toward him. His lips found hers before delicately kissing her, afraid that if he was too forceful, he'd drive her away. She responded to him after a moment, eagerly returning his kiss. He was amazed to feel magic crackle between the two of them. Hermione pulled away and looked at him in wonder.

"Why did you do that?" she asked as she struggled to catch her breath.

"We're very much alike... kindred spirits, as it were. We're two lonely people who think no one can love us. I'd like to prove that assumption wrong."

Her eyes searched his. "Why would you want me?" she asked quietly.

"Do you not understand how beautiful and desirable you are?"

Hermione laughed at that and looked away. Severus reached out and gently turned her chin so she was looking at him again.

"Hermione, you are lovely."

"Please... don't..."

He kissed her again, but pulled away quickly when he felt her tears brush his cheek.

"You don't want this," he surmised. "I have been too awful for you to find anything worthwhile in me."

She hurriedly grasped his hands before he pulled them away. "No! I..." She gazed into his face. "Surprisingly, I find I want this more than anything."

"Then why are you crying?"

"I... I didn't think this was possible for me. I didn't think I'd ever find someone to care about who'd care about me. To find out that that person is you is simply overwhelming."

"I have felt the same way, Hermione. I didn't think anyone would care for me. I tried to protect myself from everyone by becoming a horrible person. I became as ugly on the inside as I am on the outside."

Her hands moved quickly to his face. "I've never felt you to be ugly, Severus. Your demeanor colored your face in a severe way, but I've always found you quite striking."

He smiled at her then.

"See," she told him. "You're absolutely gorgeous when you smile." She smiled at him too, but soon her face became tentative.

"Do you think this can work between us?" she asked.

He pulled her close and looked into her eyes. "I'd like to try."

"Me, too."

It was all the permission he needed. His lips searched out hers, and they were once again wrapped up in each other. Her arms came up around his neck, and he marveled that he was being hugged once again. He slid his arms around her and pulled her closer. The magic crackled around them once again. They both pulled back in amazement.

"Whatever could that mean?" Hermione asked as she gazed around them.

When she'd turned back to him, he rested his forehead on hers. "I think it means the spirits approve."

She smiled then.

"We have a party to attend," he murmured, sad to have to break up their time together.

She pulled back and looked at him oddly. "You don't attend parties, Severus."

"The new me does," he explained. "I believe we both have a standing invitation with Potter. We ought not keep him waiting."

She laughed and pulled her to him. "Who are you?" she asked in amazement.

"I'm the man I should have been years ago."

Once they'd Apparated, Severus grasped Hermione's hand like a lifeline.

"They won't want me here. Let's just go," he insisted.

"Nonsense. Come on, this was your idea!"

She dragged him to the door and knocked. Harry opened it, his face towards the interior of the home, where the party was in full swing. When he spun to see the new arrivals, his face lit up.

"Hermione!"

Harry did a double take when he saw who she'd come with. "Severus?" His mouth dropped open in amazement.

"Shut your mouth, Potter. I'm not a ghost, you know."

Harry snapped his mouth shut, then smiled tentatively in welcome. Stepping back, Harry let Severus and Hermione pass through the door.

Once inside, Severus stopped short. He turned and leaned in toward Harry, as if he were about to divulge a huge secret.

"I apologize for my constant grouching at you, Potter. Thank you for the invitation."

Harry's smile widened, and suddenly Severus found himself embraced for the third time that day.

"You've always been welcome!" Harry exclaimed. He pulled away slightly but kept one arm on Severus' shoulders as he led him into the home. Hermione followed close behind. Harry shouted into the lounge.

"Look who's come, everybody!" he called to his numerous family members.

All noise in the lounge stopped. All eyes shot to Severus' face. He suddenly wished he could shrink down to the size of a mouse and scurry away. They stared at him, and he stared back. Finally, he cleared his throat and spoke.

"I know I haven't been... pleasant... to any of you. I'd like to sincerely apologize and wish you all a Merry Christmas."

Looks softened, eyes widened, and some even smiled. Molly burst from her chair and ran over to Severus, grasping his hand in hers.

"Oh, Severus! Merry Christmas. You've brought Hermione, too! Do come in and sit with the family!"

With Molly's acceptance, the dam broke, and he found himself surrounded by Weasleys of all shapes and sizes. Looking around anxiously, he spotted Hermione squeezing between George and Ginny to stand by his side. The Weasley onslaught slowly petered away as everyone went back to their places on the couches and chairs spread about the lounge. Severus gave a start when he felt an arm encircle his waist, only to realize a second later that Hermione was leaning into him with her arm securely around him, claiming him as her own in front of her friends.

Suddenly, it seemed that it was just the two of them in the room. He looked down to see her smiling happily at him. He placed an arm around her shoulder and kissed her, oblivious to the cat calls coming from everywhere in the room.

A/N: Big hugs to karelia for her quick beta work. Just one more chapter to go! Thanks for reading along with us.