Truly Wanting to Know You

Draco's hands shook slightly as he opened the letter his father's owl had brought him.

Draco,

L. Malfoy

"Just bloody great," Draco griped aloud. "One effing week until he comes here to try to ruin things."

What if his father saw through the ruse? Hermione was doing a fair job of pretending to love him so far, but there were times when he could clearly see that she was uncomfortable with him. Other times though...like when she'd been playing with his hair while he slept...it seemed as though she truly did want to be with him. When he'd woke to find her fingers interlaced in his hair and noticed that he'd turned to burrow his face against her soft stomach, enabling him to inhale her tempting scent, he'd wanted her...in every way. He'd seen the truth, however, when he'd asked her to go up to her room. She'd refused him immediately. That alone spoke volumes.

He would simply talk to her and tell her that they had to spend as much time together in the following week as possible in order to fool his father. Truth be told, he didn't mind snogging her. He enjoyed the feel of her soft, plush lips against his and the way she responded to him. What would be so wrong with a shag or two? They were both consenting adults. "Maybe I should mention it," he said aloud.

"Mention what?" Pansy asked.

"The letter," he blurted. "Father wrote to me."

"Mine did, too. He said that Lucius Malfoy assured him that you were not seeing anyone."

"Well, he's coming up next weekend to talk to me... and supposedly you. Imagine his surprise when I show up with Hermione instead," he drawled.

"You're really going to do this, aren't you?" she asked incredulously. "My father was quite angry and even went as far as to pay your father a call. You know he never tells your father anything unpleasant. I guess the fact that his only daughter is being cast aside bothers him."

"Look, Pansy," Draco began in annoyance, "we've discussed this already. The Wizarding world is different now. We don't have to do anything we don't want to do. Why shouldn't we be able to pick a life with someone that is acceptable to us?"

The smirk disappeared from her face. "I agree." She frowned slightly. "The person that I have feelings for doesn't care for me. I've tried to get his attention, but he's always on about someone else." She shrugged. "Soon, I'll get the courage to talk to him openly about my feelings. I suppose I've been uncertain about you."

"Meaning?"

"Meaning I didn't want to voice my feelings to him only to be forced to recant them and marry you, but if you are seriously going to take a stand against your father, then I will tell him."

It was the first time that he and Pansy had had a normal conversation without her ending up pouting or demanding anything. Maybe there was hope for them yet. They didn't have to follow the dictates of their parents any longer. They were adults now.

"You have my word," Draco said, extending his hand.

"Thanks," she said and sauntered off.

Draco's thoughts drifted back to Hermione. They needed to have a talk immediately, but first, he had to write a quick reply to his father.

Father,

D. Malfoy

Draco read over the short letter and was satisfied that it would be enough. He would send it from the Owlery later. At the moment, he simply needed to find his accomplice in this trickery. He went down to the common room, but he found it nearly empty. He saw Lavender. "Excuse me," he said as politely as he could. "Do you know if Hermione is still in her dormitory?"

"Left just a bit ago," Lavender said, smiling and batting her lashes at him.

"Got something in your eye?" he asked sarcastically.

"Not at all," she replied evenly.

"Right. See you."

Good Lord, that's all I need is that thing trying to seduce me. He decided to check the library for Hermione, and luck was with him. She was in the back at his...their...favorite table. "Hi," he said, sitting next to her.

"Good morning," she said cheerfully. Her smile faded. "What's wrong?"

"I got a letter from my father," he said. "He had a talk with Pansy's father and has chosen not to believe the rumors of our relationship. It seems he will be here next weekend to speak with Pansy and me." He grinned. "You will be with me instead of her, of course."

"Your father hates me," Hermione said nervously.

"What matters is that I do not," he said, taking her hand. She pulled it away.

"Really," she said indignantly. "Nobody is watching."

"Hermione, if we don't practice more...in private and in front of others...my father will not be fooled. I need him to believe that we've been seeing one another for the past year and that we intend to wed." He pulled her hand back into his. "There is nothing wrong with this. I need you... to do this for me."

She cocked her head to the side and gazed at him for a moment. Sighing, she said, "You're right. I think Ron's suspicious, too, anyway. Not to mention Ginny's glares and voiced suspicions."

"Has Ron been talking to you?" he asked.

"No, he's still mad about us... even after these past few days. What about Pansy?" she asked.

"She's not mad at all and seems happy about it." He shrugged nonchalantly. "I wouldn't care anyway. It's my life that I care about." He frowned. "She does believe that if my father makes me break things off with you...which I don't think he will...they would still try to force us together. I need to drive it in that I'm in love with you. Er... you know, our plan."

"Come and sit with me for the noon meal. It would be nice to have someone to talk to," she said hopefully. She was tired of having to walk on eggshells around Ron and Ginny. They would just have to accept it and move on. Harry was strained, trying to keep up a conversation for the three of them.

"Why don't you come and sit with me?" he asked, a naughty glint in his eyes.

"Well, they are Slytherins. They hate me," she said bluntly.

"I don't hate you. In fact, my dating you seems to have mellowed them out a bit. Noticed that some of them are starting to talk more to the other Houses, have you? And you've seen the common room these days. More of the older students are mingling," he said somewhat arrogantly.

She smiled anyway. "Yes, I have, but I'm still not ready to sit with them yet. Do you think you could brave the Gryffindors?"

He grinned. He wasn't afraid of any of them. Well, he'd not want to take on an angry Harry Potter, but he still wasn't afraid. "I could do that for you, beautiful," he said softly. Damn! Have I gone too far? She's glaring at me now. It had slipped out naturally. It was interesting that he didn't really find those words false. Was he trying to seduce her without realizing it? Of course, he was. It was all he thought about since the evening that she'd asked him all those innocent questions. He could just imagine her wide eyes staring up at him in wonder...

"Well?" she prompted. "Shall we? It's a little early yet, but there's no reason we can't go and talk. That should give everyone something to talk about."

"Come on then, love," he said, pulling her closer. He placed a light kiss upon her lips. "I do like snogging you. Really."

Her cheeks turned a pale shade of pink. "You're not so bad either."

Before he could lean in again, she pulled him up and led him out of the library. Hand in hand, they made their way to the Great Hall, causing people to stare and whisper. Potter saw them coming and nodded.

"Budge up, Potter," Draco said.

The boy seemed shocked that he was actually going to sit at the Gryffindor table. He moved aside and greeted them aloud. Draco saw that a few of their friends looked at him with narrowed eyes at first, but each looked to see what Harry had to say about it. When they saw that he was all right, they relaxed and went back to their meals.

When Ron came in and sat across from Harry, he didn't talk or look at either of them. It was just as well. Draco pretended not to notice and held a conversation with Harry about Quidditch. Hermione, though, looked uncomfortable. He reached below the table and squeezed her hand to reassure her that it would be ok. She smiled at him sweetly, and he felt his stomach flop.

When had he grown so fond of her smile? If she only knew the things he'd been fantasizing about, she'd die of humiliation. He prayed that just once before they parted ways they could be together in that way. Just to see how it would feel. But... No, I can't use her in that way. She needs to save herself for someone who can truly give her want she wants. Save herself for that dark-haired, fantasy lover she often thinks about. His countenance darkened. He hated the thought of some blubbering Snape look alike pawing on her. Surely she would find someone more suited for her. Someone like Harry. He darkened even more. The thought of Harry touching her or kissing her sent anger through him. He mentally shook himself. That was not his business. This was just a game. A game you truly want to take advantage of, an inner voice thought snidely.

He looked behind him to the Slytherin table. Pansy was watching him. She was always watching, as was Millicent. What the bloody hell did she need to openly stare for? It might make others think that she was jealous. Was she? No, not according to the things she'd told him anyway. She was probably still trying to detect a ruse. Hell, he was always talking about Hermione to her. Lately, he was always seen with Hermione. He just needed to be seen snogging her more. That would get the message across to anyone watching. He turned back to his meal. He wasn't hungry anymore. Not for food anyway. He sipped his pumpkin juice and watched Hermione. She was asking Harry something about Transfiguration. Her little lips, soft and lush, were moving gracefully. She had no idea how pretty she was. It was mostly his fault though...and people like him...for always ridiculing her. Even after they stopped this charade, he'd never be mean to her again. Now that he knew her, he couldn't be.

"What's wrong?" she asked, feeling his eyes on her.

He smiled. "I was just thinking about how pretty you are, and how much I would like to kiss you." He saw her blush under his gaze. Her eyes even softened. He leaned forward and gave her a chaste kiss on the lips.

Ron snorted and got up from the table. He exited the hall quickly. To Draco's surprise, Pansy did as well. What the hell is she playing at? She seemed upset. Hermione had caught the action as well. She looked at him questioningly. He shrugged as if to say he had no idea what Pansy was about. Ginny spoke, breaking their eye contact and gaining their attention.

"You know, Hermione, I think it's great that you found a guy. And, unfortunately, it's this guy. I just wish you didn't have to rub it in Ron's face. You now how he feels about you." Draco's eyes narrowed at the redhead.

It was Harry that spoke though. "Ginny, I think it would do if we'd all mind our own affairs. What she does is her concern. Why can't we just be happy for her... and him?" Harry asked softly. "Besides, Ron never cared much for Hermione's feelings when he was pawing Lavender, did he?"

Ginny looked reprimanded. "I know. I just feel badly for Ron. But... you are right as always, Harry. I'm just torn between being happy for Hermione and feeling sorry for my closest brother."

"I understand, Ginny," Hermione said. "I wish that Ron wasn't hurting right now, but I must say that if he'd wanted a relationship with me, he had his chances. Many of them."

"Right," Harry agreed. "He'll just have to learn to accept things."

Ginny nodded, but she looked uncertain. Harry reached across and took her hand in his in an attempt to reassure her. She blushed and pulled her hand away. "Got... got to go do some... some homework. Right, that's it. Homework." She bolted out of the hall.

Harry was looking at his hand oddly. "What did I do?"

Hermione giggled. "I think she would like you to follow her now and snog her to death." Draco laughed at the look of horror on Harry's face.

"But... no. She and I... I mean, we're just friends. Remember? She gave up on me ages ago." He seemed unsure.

Hermione shook her head in disbelief. Draco said, "Look, mate. If that didn't tell you that she wants you, I don't know if spelling it out would help much either. Go on then," he urged Harry. "Go talk to her... or snog her."

Harry nodded. "Right." Then, he blushed in embarrassment. "Well, guess I'll be off for some homework myself."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Why are we up here again?" Hermione asked, shaking slightly. "It's really cold."

"Because this is a place that lovers come to," he said softly. He cast a couple of charms to warm their clothing. "That should work." He led her to the darkest corner and sat down, pulling her onto his lap.

"Draco... I don't know if we should..."

"Shh. I know..." He pulled her face to his and slowly kissed her, slanting his lips against hers and nibbling on her lower lip slightly. "We have to get used to this. It has to look natural." In resignation, she parted her lips and allowed his tongue entrance. He felt her self-imposed barriers melting away as their kiss deepened. Before long, she was moving against him eagerly, breathing heavily, and making him want her more than before. If he knew she'd allow it, he would attempt to have her right there. He finally removed his lips from hers, gazing into her eyes as he did so. "Perfect."

"You make me feel so... aware of myself and of what we are doing," she admitted shyly.

"If you want... anything more, you need only tell me," he whispered, hoping she'd invite him up to her room.

She looked away. "I can't do that." And the mood was ruined. She stood up and fixed her rumpled robes. "I think we should turn in," she said, not looking at his eyes.

"I'm sorry," he ventured. "I shouldn't have said that."

She shrugged. "It's all right. It's what you're used to with Pansy, right? You'll learn that not all girls are built that way."

"Whoa, what's with the attitude? I said that I was sorry, Hermione, and why bring Pansy into this? She is the last thing on my mind at this moment." He turned away, propped himself against the battlement, and looked out over the grounds. Minutes passed, and he finally spoke. "I'm just trying to say that I feel that way about you now. I wouldn't mind being with you. I don't know why. I honestly can't explain it. Maybe I'd like having a true relationship with you, or we could..." His voice trailed away as he turned to find himself alone. "Fucking hell," he bellowed. She'd stormed off and left him there.

Draco felt utterly ridiculous. He'd nearly asked her to truly be his girl just now. What the hell had he been thinking? This was a game... a trick on their peers. He couldn't afford to get too caught up in it, even if she was very tempting. She was giving him mixed signals! Or so he'd thought. Hell, it was just wishful thinking, wasn't it? She turns me on and makes me want her. I'm just mistaking that for something more. I can't believe she keeps turning me down. He paused and smiled humbly.

She'd turned him down. That was the second time. An odd feeling of respect for her replaced his annoyance. "Good for you, Granger," he said to himself, making his way back to their common room, pride somewhat wounded regardless of his newfound respect for her. He was happy that she was not about because he didn't feel like facing her. He might even say something unpleasant, and to others, that would mean that there was trouble in their relationship.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Need someone to talk to?" Pansy asked Ron as she moved to stand beside him.

"What do you care?"

"I've been caring for a while now," she said quietly, feeling completely nervous. "I hate seeing you like this."

Ron's eyes widened. "But... why?" he asked in disbelief.

"Well, it started out when I heard Lavender Brown bragging about you in the girls' toilet one day." Pansy grinned sheepishly. "She had no idea that I was in there, and I'm not above a little eavesdropping. Anyway, when I saw you after that, I noticed that she was right. You have big, strong hands and long fingers... and big feet."

Confused, Ron said, "You were inspecting me?" His chest puffed out slightly. "Bragging on me, eh? Well, I am quite resourceful when..."

Laughing lightly, Pansy nodded. "I was checking you out, and each time I saw you, I'd do it again. Before long, I was thinking of the things she'd said and imagining them... only that you were being with me, not her."

"What about Malfoy?"

"I've always been resigned to our fate of being married. In fact, it was all I wanted... until you."

"Is that right?"

"Yes. When I'd think of you, I would get excited and feel as though I were bursting. With Draco, it ended up feeling more like a duty. Do you understand? I wanted more. I wanted to have love and excitement." She looked away. "When you broke things off with Lavender, I was smug about it, thinking it served her right for not treating you as you deserved, but it also saddened me because I knew that I could never have you either."

"So when Malfoy told you about his relationship with Hermione, you were... happy?"

"Yes and afraid."

"Of what?"

"I was afraid, Ron, that something would happen, and I'd be forced to marry him anyway. I was afraid to hope for a chance with you." She looked down. "The only reason I decided to tell you now was because I saw the way you were looking at them earlier during the noon meal. I hated seeing you hurt. I thought... No, I hoped that I could ease your pain."

"Pansy, are you asking me to shag you?" he blurted.

She shoved him in irritation. "I'm asking for a chance to win your love, not to shag you."

"Oh."

Pansy backed away from him, heart breaking and feeling ashamed. "Forget it. Please do not tell anyone that I said this to you."

"Wait," he said, reaching out to grab her arm. "I didn't say I wasn't interested."

"So you are?"

"It's a little strange for me," he said quietly. "I care about Hermione a lot and figured she'd be the girl that I married one day." He sighed. "I can't compete with Malfoy. I haven't his money or looks." His eyes narrowed. "That being the case, why would you truly be interested in me?"

"I told you why. I overheard Lavender going on about you, and it always stayed with me. I started watching you, and I found myself falling in love with you... or at least with who I perceived you to be...my fantasy Ron." She took his hands in hers. "If you can give me a chance to truly get to know you, maybe I can love the real you, and maybe you can love me. I'm not going to force your feelings for her to change, but if you'll have me, I think I can help you forget her."

"Can I think about this?"

She bit her lip in disappointment and nodded.

"Don't be offended," he said. "It just amazes me that someone like you would want me. Are you certain this isn't a joke?"

Pansy smiled. "I promise." She stood on her tiptoes and pressed her lips to his for what she intended to be a chaste kiss. Instead, she found herself wrapped in his arms and being held off the ground as he kissed her deeply. Wow, it's better than I'd imagined.

Southern's Notes: I think Ron and Pansy will be just fine. Teehee! Poor Draco. He's confusing love with lust, and Hermione needs to realize her feelings and tell him before it's too late.

Christy's Notes: I love the fact that Draco can't get Hermione out of his mind. Obviously, that has not happened to him before! Let's hope Hermione figures things out soon! I am loving Ron and Pansy! Big hands and feet indeed.