Discussions

Hermione found it difficult to match the pace of her formidable Headmistress, who led the way from the dungeons to her office with an agitated speed. Behind the two women, the professors followed: one with a malevolent smirk and a slight swagger, the other with a determined step and a stern frown. All four traveled in silence.

With each turn around the corridors, Hermione's uneasiness grew. She couldn't fathom why Headmistress McGonagall had interrupted the standoff between herself and Professor Snape or why Professor Lupin had accompanied the scowling older woman. And where had Snape been?

Hermione didn't have a moment to continue that thought, as the group soon alighted the hidden staircase leading to the Headmistress' office. The ancient gargoyle spun with a groan when Minerva hastily whispered the password (it was spoken so quickly and vehemently, almost a hiss, that Hermione hadn't a chance to catch it). McGonagall stomped up the steps, and as Hermione approached the hidden staircase, she was roughly pushed aside with a muttered curse as the Potions master mounted the stairs before her. With a huff and a resentful glare, Hermione followed her employer with Remus close at her heels.

Upon entering the room, the Headmistress quickly deposited her cloak on a nearby Victorian, high-backed chair that stood sentinel by the doorway. Hermione stood to the side after crossing the threshold, allowing Remus to come in and valiantly stand between her and Snape before casting her a look that she couldn't quite interpret. Snape caught the exchange and his eyes glittered maliciously. Without looking away from Hermione, he addressed Minerva. "Headmistress, I believe you and I have a private matter to discuss."

"Quite right, Severus. Please join me in my chambers. The two of you," she spoke briskly, "please stay here. We will return in a moment." With that, Snape and McGonagall disappeared behind a carved wooden door with a brusque snap.

Hermione threw herself into the nearest seat with an exasperated sigh. "Remus, could you please tell me what is going on?"

"I should ask you the same," came his curt reply. She noticed that he would not meet her eyes, and his entire demeanor cast off waves of discomfort and even fear as he began to pace the room.

The occupants of the many portraits shuffled forward in their frames in order to glimpse the goings-on – all except for one, of course. Albus Dumbledore's accurately rendered self gazed off into the distance, portraying indifference and obliviousness to the surroundings. Hermione was not fooled. She opened her mouth to speak to the late Headmaster, but no sound escaped her lips as Lupin's voice in the back of her mind reminded her of Dumbledore's antipathy toward the child Snape. She felt her heart actually harden against the thought of ever seeking advice from this man, and her stomach grew queasy at the long-held vision of him as a kind, grandfather-like figure in her life. She tore her eyes from the likeness of her former Headmaster and instead focused on the bookshelves that lined the walls behind the immense mahogany desk and framed the arched windows that looked over Hogwarts' grounds. How many times have I stood here when my life was on the brink of change? How many hours of my life were spent here, in this room, in this very spot?

Her musings were cut short by Remus' quiet voice as, with an air of defeat, he spoke. "I'm sorry, Hermione. I shouldn't be upset with you. He came," the 'he' in question being, of course, Severus, "just as you stepped into the fireplace. He knew you were there, and he suspected that we talked about him... I denied it, of course, and he didn't believe me, which shouldn't surprise any of us." He paused for several tense moments, taking a deep breath to begin again, never lifting his gaze from the stone floor. "Part of me feels like I did when the thought of telling Sirius and James about his life when I was younger struck me...I felt... I feel like I've betrayed him. I shouldn't have told you anything, Hermione, even if the thought of sharing this with someone else could release me from a burden and... and even if I thought you might..."

"I might what, Remus?" She turned to him and felt his overwhelming sense of regret surround and crush her.

"That you might... help him." He whispered so softly that her ears had to strain to hear the words. Silence engulfed them again as Hermione was overcome with a sense of guilt, realizing she had pulled the strings of their friendship very taut and that he was suffering the worst for it.

After a long expanse of time, in which they both awkwardly avoided the other's gaze, Hermione broke the silence. "Remus, why were we called in here? Why were you with Professor McGonagall when she nearly broke down the door in the dungeons?" She turned again to face the windows as she softly asked, "Are we in trouble?"

Lupin looked up and stared at her back for several moments before replying, "We? I don't think you're in trouble, Hermione, unless you did something I don't know about. You haven't been making any more Polyjuice Potion, have you?" He attempted a weak smile.

She twirled to face him. "I... I was disrespectful to a professor..."

Lupin genuinely grinned at her now. "Hermione, love, you aren't a student anymore. You are allowed to voice your opinions, even as an apprentice. In fact, you are technically a part of the staff now, and there isn't a staff member here today – other than perhaps Filch – who hasn't said or done something a little 'disrespectful' to Severus. There's also never been a time, that I'm aware of, that he hasn't deserved it." He spread his arms in a gesture for Hermione to come to him, and when she sat down in the chair beside his own, he drew her into a friendly embrace.

She beamed up at him. "Thank you, that makes me feel a little better. You're sure the Headmistress isn't angry with me?"

"For the display we walked in on? Gods, no, Hermione! I daresay she's proud of you for at least attempting to put him in his place. Though I must warn you not to get too ahead of yourself here; he is a violent man, and your verbal showdowns are all well and good when there is a third party present, but please don't engage in them when alone.

And to answer your question, I was with Minerva because I wanted to check on you. She entered my office just after Severus left, and she inquired about the shouting and sounds of breaking glass..."

Hermione gasped, and Remus quickly waved his hand in a dismissive gesture before continuing, "He just broke a decanter, nothing a Reparo couldn't fix. As I was saying, she came in and asked, so I told her everything. Don't look so upset, Hermione. Her reaction to your questions about Severus might be different from what you expect. We are all too aware of your inquisitive nature, and she knew it was only a matter of time before you decided to find a reason and solution to his anti-social behavior. No, she was only upset about the repercussions that might occur now that he, somehow, has found out. Which was why we rushed to find you. He left my office in a foul mood, and we only interrupted because we feared he would take everything out on you..."

"I can take care of myself, thank you." Hermione sullenly interrupted. "I've battled with the both – no, the three of you against Voldemort," she allowed a dramatic pause for his infallible wince before resuming, "and I survived. Why do you think I cannot face a man who I've known for more than seven years?"

"Because you don't know him, Hermione, at least not yet. You were much more protected then; if he would have hurt you, Harry, or Ron he'd have hell to pay – not only from all of us, but from Vo...Voldemort himself. But now you are, for all intents and purposes, an adult. Despite what we may believe here, legally he does not have to restrain so much from hexing or cursing you."

"Then let him!" she angrily exclaimed. "Let me learn things for myself! Like you said, I'm not a child anymore! Quit coddling me. I know he's a petulant, immature, rash man. That hasn't changed from my school years. But give me a chance to show him that I can handle his maniacal mood swings and be a responsible, intelligent woman – both of you need to quit coming to my rescue; it only cements the fact that I'm still a nosy schoolgirl to him!" Out of breath, she leapt from the chair and paced during her speech. Now that she had finished, she walked back to the door where the subject of their debate had vanished. Refusing again to even glance at Remus, she focused her attention on calming herself as she stared at the window. Lupin merely gave a dejected sigh before the silence enveloped them both once more.

***

Snape stood as the Headmistress seated herself in a wingback, leather chair next to the roaring fire contained in the stone hearth. She glanced up at him and gave an annoyed gesture, indicating that he should take the duplicate chair opposite hers. He made a dramatic show of settling into the comfortable chair as she asked through a clenched jaw, "Tea?"

He smiled and dismissively waved his elegant hand, watching with undisguised glee as she narrowed her eyes at him. She grasped the nearby tea kettle with more force than necessary, causing it to clink against the rest of the tea settings as she poured herself a cup.

Severus took this moment to allow his gaze to travel around the room, marveling at how different it felt now that Dumbledore's belongings were absent. It was a small sitting room, one he had had the misfortune to be trapped in before, but the energy of the room had changed since its previous owner no longer resided within these private walls. The air no longer suffocated him, the smells no longer made him nauseous. The stone walls now seemed to emit a warmth that surrounded him; a warmth that had nothing to do with the fire cackling beside him. There was now an aroma of sandalwood and vanilla that danced around his nose, inciting a taste of near contentment (if contentment could have a taste, and Severus was convinced it should) instead of the familiar tang of vomit and blood that assaulted his senses when left alone in a tiny room with his surrogate father, Albus Dumbledore.

The room itself only consisted of the two occupied chairs, a hearth, a large, looming, arched window, a battered, medieval-looking table between the two chairs – upon which always sat the same sterling silver tea settings – and a large, woven wool rug that claimed nearly the entire expanse of the floor. Two doors stood on opposite ends of the sitting room: one led back to the Headmistress' office, the other led to her private bed chambers (which Severus knew, from past experience – however short-lived – as a headmaster himself, also housed a bathroom, separate study, laboratory, and small -– but equally adequate – library).

Snape was sharply brought back to his surroundings when a small sigh issued from Minerva's lips. She had been staring at him wistfully.

"I've missed you," she said suddenly. "I've missed those few unguarded moments I've been blessed to witness around you. That look, there, on your face," Severus quickly masked his emotions to resemble disdain, and she rolled her eyes before continuing, "the look that revealed the man inside..."

"You're quite mistaken, Minerva," he snorted, seizing the opportunity to interrupt. "That was no 'look' of reflection or introspection. I was merely passing gas."

Her sharp laughter filled the room, invading his already overwhelmed senses, filling the air around them with more warmth. He scowled to quickly contain the smile that threatened to slip out.

"I've missed your strange sense of humor as well, Severus," she gasped out between subsiding giggles. Not knowing how exactly to respond to this comment or her behavior, he merely sneered at her. He belatedly realized his error in judgment as she fell into a fit of laughter again. He was just beginning to convince himself that the house-elves had spiked her tea when she spoke again, completely out of breath from her hysterics. "Severus, I..." She paused to collect herself. "Severus, what I mean to say is that I haven't seen this side of you for far too long. I am delighted to see that circumstances, being as they are now, have allowed you to be..."

"'Circumstances as they are now,' Headmistress?" he asked silkily with a slightly raised eyebrow.

"Mmm, yes, Severus. Circumstances as they are now – I believe that is what I said."

He glared at her menacingly and growled, "I apologize; I am aware of what you said, I'm afraid I am a little lost at your meaning."

Her mouth disappeared into a thin, straight line as she glowered at him. "Severus, there is no need to get that attitude with me. Nor is there any reason for you to growl at me. We are adults, please speak like one." Just as his eyes began to flicker dangerously (this was a warning sign to those that knew him best, and Minerva felt she definitely fell into that category), she interrupted his attempts at retaliation by saying matronly, "Now, now. No need to get in a snit. What I meant by 'circumstances' is now that the War is over, and you are no longer under the thumb of two organizations that used you as a spy, now that you no longer wake up each day wondering if it will be your last...oh, Severus, please quit being so melodramatic," she replied to his look of incredulity. "Teaching potions does not endanger your life daily, no matter what stories you tell of Weasleys, Longbottoms, and Potters in the staff room. As I was saying, now that your life is decidedly free of most external dangers, and you've a new apprentice..."

"Ah," he drawled, "That is what this is about. To remind me how much easier my life is with Miss Granger as my apprentice?"

Minerva frowned and stated, "Well, you cannot deny that she has been a great asset..."

"Has she?"

"Oh, for Merlin's sake, please quit interrupting, Severus!" She took a moment to calm herself by sipping her tea and closing her eyes before continuing, "She has done all the 'grunt' work and without compliant. She's scrubbed the cauldrons, replenished Madam Pomfrey's potions supplies..."

"Grunt work, Minerva? Unlike most professors, masters and mistresses in their fields as they may be," here he mischievously met her eyes before continuing, "I actually enjoy all aspects of my profession of potions. Including this so-called 'grunt' work. Furthermore, I hadn't realized that I advertised to the rest of the staff just what Miss Granger's duties actually were. I certainly don't recall informing you that she was replenishing Madam Pomfrey's stocks. This leads me to believe that she does, in fact, 'complain' of her assignments. Well," snarled Snape as he rose from his chair and headed for the door leading to the office, "I suppose if it is more challenging work she is looking for, I won't disappoint."

"Severus!" Minerva called after him in a commanding voice. He came to an abrupt halt, but did not turn to face her. There was a pause before she demanded, "What were you two doing when we walked into your office?"

"Setting the rules. Why was the werewolf there?"

"We were both concerned about your behavior..."

Severus snorted sardonically and spun to meet her eyes with a lethal glare. "My behavior does not concern either of you. It never has, has it Professor?" Minerva found herself at a complete loss of words as her mind screamed that she was quickly losing control of the situation.

"Regrettably, I cannot change the past, Severus – but your behavior has always concerned me." She stood straight and stared into the inky eyes of her former student; only the slight tremble of her fingers gave her uneasiness away.

"Yes," he purred, advancing on her, "the past, no matter how unrelentingly it repeats itself in my mind, cannot be changed. I would appreciate it if it was also no longer spoken of."

"I cannot guarantee that, Severus. Though I regret many things in my life, the biggest has been my treatment of you." Her gaze melted from hardened steel to concern as her pose relaxed and her fingers stilled. Minerva knew better than to reach out to this man, but it did not stop the desire to hold him from gripping her. Would he have still abhorred touch so violently if she had made more of an effort to embrace him as a boy? As she watched him storm from the room in palpable fury, she resigned herself to the devastating realization that she could have changed so much had she been more of the Gryffindor she so prided herself on being.

***

Hermione jumped as the door behind which the Headmistress and Potions master had recently disappeared burst open and revealed a very angry Severus Snape. Very angry at her, she realized with a start, as he was openly glaring at her with such malice and pure hate that she felt her stomach drop to somewhere in the vicinity of her knees. Before she could gather the words necessary to launch a scathing – and deeply satisfying (Gods, that has to be Slytherin transference, she thought) – attack on her employer for his behavior, the subject of her displeasure pinched the bridge of his nose and moved aside to make room for the Headmistress to enter the office.

Minerva McGonagall tersely pushed past Snape and took her post behind the massive desk, indicating that he and Hermione should sit. Biting back her fury at the Potions master, Hermione abruptly strode to the chair she had vacated only moments before. Snape, of course, remained standing. Must he challenge everyone? thought Hermione.

"Yes, well, I've asked you all here to discuss a few... issues that have recently been brought to my attention," stated the Headmistress. Both Snape and Hermione glanced at the silent professor still sitting near the hearth. "First off, when I visited Professor Lupin to ask for his lesson plans earlier this evening, I heard shouting from down the corridor. Severus, whatever you and Remus feel the need to discuss, I trust you should be able to keep your voice at a civil level and your tongue in check." The last part of her speech was openly directed at Snape while he stared at Lupin malevolently. Remus, for his part, cocked his head slightly at Severus in defiance. Minerva cleared her throat to gain the attention of the two men before continuing, "Now, Miss Granger..."

"Please call me Hermione, Headmistress." Hermione politely interrupted.

"Hmm? Oh, yes, of course, dear," McGonagall absently agreed, "Hermione, I feel the need to ask you, as I haven't had a chance yet during this busy school year – are you fairing well in your apprenticeship?"

Hermione caught Snape's hopeful gaze before sweetly replying, "Oh, yes, very much so – I thank you for asking, Professor." A pronounced sneer escaped Severus' lips, and Hermione had the bad grace to grin mischievously at him.

"Oh, dear, please call me Minerva – Merlin knows you've earned that right many times over!" McGonagall was either blissfully unaware of the exchange between the apprentice and her professor or was astonishingly tolerant of the former student's baiting behavior – Hermione couldn't decide which, but had a sneaking suspicion of the latter.

Both women trained their gaze on Snape as the Headmistress said, "Good. I trust you are doing quite well with your first apprentice and her current work, Severus. Although, again I must stress that you should learn to control your outbursts in the future, especially when students might hear. That said, the main reason I asked you all here is to inform you that some of the Order members will be coming to dinner to visit at the end of this week and I would like all of you in attendance. All. Of. You. Now, you are dismissed, but welcome to stay for tea!" It was obvious that this speech was mostly aimed specifically at Severus and spoken so that no room was granted for interruptions.

After the dismissal, the Potions master swiftly took his leave, his robes billowing in an infuriated fashion in his wake. Their past altercation ignored in light of the announcement, Hermione turned to Remus, gestured toward the exit, and whispered, "Well, I'd say we got off relatively painlessly."

"That remains to be seen," Both Minerva and Lupin stated in unison. All three shared a look of apprehension as he and Hermione started toward the door.

"Both of you, though I know this falls on deaf ears, please seek me if he..." The Headmistress allowed her voice to trail off, knowing that to the two listening the meaning of her statement was not lost.

Both nodded to her before slipping out, leaving Minerva alone with her thoughts. She glanced up at the portrait of Dumbledore, who gazed down on her with grave distress apparent in his two-dimensional eyes.

"Albus, my heart breaks for the boy..." She was scarcely able to finish the sentence before tears escaped her and raced down her cheeks.

Dumbledore mirrored her emotions as he whispered, "I am so sorry..."

Author's Note – Loads of love and gratitude to my beta, the magical Angel Mischa! Any mistakes found are mine cause I ...am human! That or it's because I forgot to change something AM told me to. Which is still me being human.

Also, I haven't stated this, so now's a good a time as any - all characters belong to JKR, I'm not making any money off this story, yadda yadda.