Chapter 2

Disclaimer: The characters in this fan fiction are copyright by J K Rowling, but this specific story is entirely mine. It has been written for fun only, and I do not make any money out of it. Nevertheless, the story should not be reproduced without seeking my permission first.

Many thanks to my beta, cherrypop, for catching my mistakes and introducing me to the finer details of the English language.

Hermione was exhausted. For the past four hours, she had stayed in the library and read another book on medical potions. Again it had been in vain. Now, she was on her way to the Great Hall for lunch.

Deep in her thoughts, she didn't see Professors Dumbledore and Snape, who were also headed for the Great Hall.

"Ah, Miss Granger," Dumbledore greeted her. "How are you? I hope you aren't spending too much time in the hospital wing and the library. You should look after your own health and go out more. After all, it's summer."

Hermione forced herself to smile at him. "Yes, sir." She thought she heard Snape snort.

"And, of course, it's always important to eat properly," the headmaster added, his eyes twinkling at her. "I assume you were on your way to lunch?"

She nodded and caught Snape sneering behind Dumbledore's back.

"Shall we go then?" the headmaster said and set off.

Snape and Hermione followed him. She trailed behind a few steps and before she reached the door to the Great Hall, Snape had already let it go so that it shut in her face. Hermione balled her hands into fists.

***

She sat at Harry's bedside. In her hand she held a novel by E M Forster, but she didn't read it to him. Instead, she looked at the picture on the wall and thought about happier times. Some tears started to silently roll down her cheeks.

She only realised that Professor Snape had come in when he spoke to her. "It seems that the headmaster was right. You spend too much time in the castle thinking too much, Miss Granger."

She looked at him through blurry eyes and gave a short laugh.

"Yes, you've understood me correctly. Go outside, Miss Granger, and enjoy the summer sun."

Hermione still stared at him.

Snape sighed and stepped closer, looking intently at her for a while, before he sighed again. "The last time I asked you, you didn't give me a sufficient answer, but perhaps you will do so now," he said in a low voice. "Why are you still here, Miss Granger? Why don't you go home?"

Hermione felt her blood pressure rising. A red haze appeared in front of her eyes. "What is it with you all?" she shouted. "Why do all of you want to get rid of me? I can't imagine that I actually disturb you that much." Now the tears freely ran down her cheeks.

"Miss Granger." His voice was icy. "No one, as you put it, wants to get rid of you." His dark eyes, which had bored into her hers, brightened slightly when he added in a softer tone, "Not even I."

"I'm sorry," she whispered and looked down at the floor.

When he held out a handkerchief, her head came up again. She hesitated, but eventually took it and dabbed her eyes with the white silky cloth.

Snape watched her, obviously waiting for her to say something.

Hermione worried her lower lip between her teeth, before she made up her mind. She inhaled deeply. "I can't leave him. I don't know why, but I just can't." She choked but managed not to cry again, as she grabbed Harry's hand and clutched it.

Snape sat down on the bed next to Harry's. "No one expects you to abandon your friend, Miss Granger. But you've sat at Potter's bedside each afternoon for several weeks now. The rest of the day, you spend in the library looking for a cure. You didn't have one day for yourself since the battle ended, am I correct?"

She nodded.

"But as much as it might pain you, if you are honest to yourself, you have to admit that you can't help him."

Her eyes narrowed. "You never..."

"Miss Granger," he said with a sigh, "let me continue."

She shut her mouth.

"No one knows if and when Potter will wake up again. And therefore, you have to think of your own future."

Hermione started to say something, but he cut her off, waving his hand at her.

"I know that the other professors have already talked to you, and I understand how annoying they can be." He smirked. "But as much as I hate to admit it, they are right."

"But..."

Again he stopped her. "I'm not telling you to begin an apprenticeship today, Miss Granger. But I believe you originally did intend to apprentice, didn't you?"

She nodded.

"Then do it. Not today and not tomorrow but soon."

"I don't..."

"I'm not finished," he snapped. "What about your parents, Miss Granger? Don't they miss you?"

"Yes," she said.

"Have you seen them at all since you finished school?"

"No."

"Did you tell them why you are still here at Hogwarts?"

"I sent them an owl," Hermione muttered and hung her head so that her hair covered her blushing face.

"Go home, Miss Granger," Snape said softly. "At least for the weekend. Your parents will understand why you stayed here. But you should explain it to them in person and not via an owl. And if you're worrying about Potter," he added, his lip curling, "you can be assured that he will be cared for until you return."

Her head shot up. "You aren't sending me away permanently? I can come back?"

He rolled his eyes. "Yes, you can. I think I can speak for the other professors as well, when I say that you are always welcome at Hogwarts." He flashed her a glance. "As a visitor."

She inhaled deeply. "Well, then perhaps I should send my parents an owl, telling them that I will come to see them this weekend."

"Yes, you should," he said and got up. He stood in front of her, towering over her.

Hermione studied him. His body was rigid, and he held his hands behind his back. He wore his usual billowing black robes. His limp, greasy hair hung above his collar; his large nose was still hooked; and his lips were pressed together in a thin line.

He looked like he always had done. Dark, cold and frightening. She didn't like to admit it to herself, but during her seven years at Hogwarts, he had often instilled fear in her as well.

Her eyes went wide as she realised that she had no longer been afraid of him in the past few weeks.

"What, Miss Granger?" he asked and scowled at her.

"Oh, nothing." She gave him a tentative smile. "Thank you, Professor Snape."

For a moment, she thought his eyes had lit up, but then they were as dark again as ever.

***

"Hello, Harry, how are you?" Hermione cried, before the door to the hospital wing had even closed behind her. "I'm so glad I went home. Professor Snape was right. My parents did understand and I'm feeling much better now." She took his hand. "What did you do whilst I was gone? Did anyone visit you?"

While she was still talking to Harry, Professor Snape entered from Madam Pomfrey's office. "I see you are back, Miss Granger." His deep voice rang through the ward.

She turned and saw him sneering at her. "Yes, I am," she said and gave him a bright smile.

He looked taken aback for a second, but then his sneer was back in place. "Pity."

"Oh no, you don't fool me, Professor. I remember what you told me last week."

His eyes bored into hers. "I wonder what that could have been."

"You said that I was always welcome here." Hermione kept smiling at him.

Snape raised his eyebrows. "You must be mistaken, Miss Granger. For me the happiest days of the school year are those when the students leave," he said smoothly. "If you would excuse me now, I have some work to do."

***

"'Then she was standing before me, and suddenly the atmosphere underwent a peculiar change - almost as though the two of us had been suddenly thrust on to some other plane of being altogether. I am afraid it is not easy to describe clearly what I mean here. All I can say is that everything around us suddenly became very still; it was my impression that Miss Kenton's manner also underwent a sudden change; there was a strange seriousness in her expression, and it struck me she seemed almost frightened.'"

Voices brought Hermione's reading to Harry to an end when the door to the hospital wing opened.

"No, Severus. I don't think it's a good idea to treat the poor children with Dr Ubbly's Oblivious Potion on a regular basis," Madam Pomfrey said, as she and the Professor Snape entered. Then she saw Hermione. "Oh hello, Miss Granger."

"Hello, Madam Pomfrey."

"Reading, are you? What book is it?" the nurse asked while she and the Potions master approached Harry's bed.

"'The Remains of the Day' by Kazuo Ishiguro."

"I don't think I know that story. What is it about?"

"It's a Muggle novel," Hermione explained. "It's about a butler who devotes his entire life to his master and thereby gives up on his one chance for happiness."

Professor Snape's eyes narrowed. "Dreadful."

Madam Pomfrey smiled. "Do you refer to the story or the butler's life?"

He sneered. "Both."

"Oh really?" said Madam Pomfrey and, without waiting for an answer, went to her office.

Snape remained standing a few feet away from Harry's bed.

"If you don't mind, Professor, I would like to go on reading," Hermione said.

"Are you sure that this is the kind of book Potter is interested in?"

Her eyes clouded for a moment. "He doesn't complain," she said and gave a short laugh.

He stared at her, clearly surprised. She could feel his scrutinising look on her face. "Sarcasm, Miss Granger? I never thought of you as a sarcastic person."

"No, perhaps not." She swallowed hard. "But it seems appropriate in the current situation."

"What situation?"

"What situation?" Hermione cried and leapt from her chair. "Harry's situation. He's been in a coma for the past six weeks, in case you haven't noticed."

"I have indeed noticed it, Miss Granger," said Snape icily. With a wave of his hand, he indicated her to sit down again. "But I am quite astonished at your behaviour." He started to pace in front of Harry's bed.

"Why?" she asked, after having taken her seat again.

He looked at her over his shoulder. "Yesterday, when you had returned from your parents' home, you seemed to be quite cheerful. Therefore, I assumed you had found a way to cope with Potter's illness."

"Yes, I thought so, too," she whispered, following his movements with her eyes. "It felt so good to be home again, and when I came back yesterday, I was confident that everything would turn out okay for Harry." Her hands clutched at her old school robes. "But today, I don't feel confident any more. I can't leave him, and I don't want to leave him, but it's all so difficult."

Snape was still pacing the room.

She sniffed. "It's so difficult to sit beside his bed and to know that I can't do anything for him."

She started to cry silently.

He had stopped at the window. Without moving, he looked out of it, his back to Hermione. After a while, he spoke. "Some years ago, I was in a similar position as Potter is now - if only for a few days," he said in a neutral voice. His left hand caressed the windowsill. "I had been badly injured after an attack and had to stay here in the hospital wing for a week. During the four days I was unconscious, I couldn't see Madam Pomfrey and the headmaster, and I didn't hear them talking to me, but somehow I could feel that there was someone who tried to reach out to me."

He stopped himself, and after a few moments he turned around to face Hermione, who had finished crying. His voice was husky. "Don't give up on Potter. Continue visiting him and talking to him."

For once, Snape's face didn't show the contempt or derision she was accustomed to from her school days. Instead, he looked slightly agitated. Without another word, he hurried from the hospital wing.

Hermione stared after him, twirling a strand of her hair.

***

The stack of books on the library table had grown, but still Hermione had not found any useful information on how to help Harry.

She sat at the table, a Potions book in front of her, but she didn't read it. She was gazing at the opposite wall, which was covered by a shelf of books. Her head jerked around when she heard a dark voice.

"Miss Granger?"

"Yes, sir?" she said as Professor Snape swept towards her. He held a parchment in his hand.

"The Headmaster asked me to look for you. Although I really don't know why. Where else could you have been except the library, if you were not in the hospital wing?" He smirked.

Hermione forced her voice to stay calm. "How can I help Professor Dumbledore?"

Snape's smirk became even more pronounced. "Oh no. I think he intends to help you," he said and gave her the parchment.

With a sense of dread, she took it. It was a letter, signed by a Professor Fitzwilliam. The name didn't mean anything to her.

She shot Snape a glance, but when he remained quiet, she began to read the letter. Halfway through, she felt her blood begin to boil, and when she had finished it, she was seething.

"How dare he?" she muttered between clenched teeth.

Snape cocked an eyebrow. "I beg your pardon?"

She pressed her lips together but eventually she couldn't hold back. "Apparently Professor Dumbledore asked one of his friends, who is a Charms professor, to accept me as an apprentice." Her voice grew louder. "He didn't even ask me about it. And now this Professor Fitzwilliam has written back, telling the headmaster that he would be very pleased to have me." She crumpled the letter into a ball and threw it across the room. "How can he decide about my future without even consulting me?"

Snape's lips curled into a knowing smile. He pulled a chair from under the table and sat down across from Hermione. "He means well."

She looked exasperated. "Of course he does. But I don't want to be a Charms professor. And I also don't want Professor Dumbledore to meddle."

"Well, what do you want, Miss Granger?"

She glanced at her former Potions master, who in turn watched her levelly.

"I don't know," she said and sighed. Her hands began to fiddle with a quill that lay on the table. "Before we began to prepare for the final battle, I was certain I wanted to become a Transfiguration mistress, but now I'm not sure about that any longer..." Her voice trailed off.

"That's something only you can decide."

"Yes, I know. But it's a difficult decision. I should be happy, now that V-." She stopped. "Now that the Dark Lord is dead. And I am. But for some reason I feel more insecure about the future than I did when he was still alive." She shrugged her shoulders. "That doesn't make any sense, does it?"

Snape's black eyes fixed hers, and she looked away.

"Of course, it makes sense, Miss Granger." His voice was dispassionate. "As much as everyone wanted the Dark Lord's reign of terror to end, it nevertheless was the world we had come to know for a long time. In a way, everyone felt perversely safe, because they knew what was expected of them." He paused. "When he died, a lot of us lost what had kept us alive during that time."

Hermione turned her eyes back on him, still playing with the quill.

His face didn't betray any emotion. But suddenly his hand shot forward, and he snatched the quill from her hand. He laid it in front of him on the table.

Neither of them said anything until Snape finally rose. Softly he said, "I'm sure you will make the right decision, Miss Granger."

After he had left, Hermione remained sitting at the table, thoughts tumbling through her head.

***

"Look who's here," a loud voice came from the door to the hospital wing.

"Ron," cried Hermione, got up and ran into the open arms of her red-haired friend, who looked thinner and even ganglier than she had remembered him. He caught her up and whirled her round.

After putting her down, Ron went over to Harry's bed and stared at his friend for a long time.

"Hello, Harry," he said quietly, before he turned to Hermione, who stood beside him. "How is he doing? Hasn't he got any better at all?" he asked in a choked voice.

"No." Hermione shook her head. "Madam Pomfrey tells me that he will be alright again, but so far there has been no progress whatsoever."

Ron sighed and sat down on the chair beside Harry's bed. Hermione fetched another chair and sat beside him. She grabbed Ron's hand, and silently they regarded their friend.

"I'm so glad that Mum eventually let me come - at least for one day. I would have liked to visit Harry much sooner," Ron said after a while.

"I know, and I'm sure Harry would understand."

"Yeah, maybe," said Ron, his eyes cast down.

But then he lifted his head, and a smile crept across his face. "You know, I'm sure Harry wouldn't want us to be depressed, don't you think? We're free again. A lot of bad things happened." He swallowed, but then his face lit up again. "But now we're finally free."

Hermione laughed when she looked at him. His eyes were dancing.

He took her hands and pulled her from her chair. With a loud laugh, he started to whirl her around again.

Both were oblivious when the door opened and Professor Snape came in.

"Miss Granger, are you...?" His voice trailed off when he saw them.

Ron let go of Hermione and stood straight, staring at his former Potions master, whilst Hermione smoothed her robes. "Hello, Professor," he murmured.

"Mr Weasley." Snape's eyes glittered. "How nice of you to look in on your friends. They must be delighted." His lips curled into a twisted smile.

Ron looked at Snape and his Adam's apple convulsed rapidly.

"Miss Granger." Snape faced Hermione. "I came here, hoping to see you. I believe you still have the book I lent you. Would you give it back to me sometime today, please? I need it."

With a nod at Hermione, Snape turned on his heels and left.

"What was that?" said Ron. "Did he say 'please'? And he lent you a book?" He looked unbelievingly at Hermione.

"Yes, one on comatose patients, who woke up again," Hermione answered. "A Muggle book. It was really interesting."

"Snape lent you a Muggle book?" Ron's voice rose higher. "The greasy git?"

"Yes. And don't call him a 'greasy git'."

***

"Oh, Madam Pomfrey. I think Harry is getting worse." Hermione pointed at Harry's face when the nurse had reached her. "Look, don't you think that Harry has become even paler? And he certainly looks thinner than before." She stroked his hollow cheek.

Madam Pomfrey nodded. "I'm afraid he's losing strength."

Hermione's head shot around. "What do you mean, he's losing strength?"

"The only thing he's been doing for over six weeks now is lie in bed. We feed him, but that's not enough. He needs to be outside, to walk, run, play Quidditch, feel the sun. But since he doesn't, his blood circulation is low and his muscles are atrophying."

"And?" Hermione stared at the nurse. "What are you going to do?"

Madam Pomfrey shook her head. "There's nothing I can do. When Mr Potter awakes, he will have to exercise to recover his strength himself."

"But we can't wait that long," Hermione said. "We have to do something. Now. We can't just leave him lying here wasting away."

"Unfortunately I can't think of anything to do," Madam Pomfrey said, shrugging her shoulders in defeat.

***

Professor Snape found her in the library. Again, she was perusing books, hoping that she would come across a cure for Harry. She had just started on another book when she heard Snape come in.

"Not giving up, I see," he said.

She looked up. He stood with his back to the window. The sun was shining in, so that his face was hidden by the shadow.

"No, I'm not," she said. "I will find a way to help him. I can't stand sitting at his bed any longer and seeing him lying there helplessly."

"But not all answers can be found in books, Miss Granger."

She squinted her eyes and tried to make out Snape's face. "It's the best I can do, isn't it? Madam Pomfrey has given up on him. Therefore, the only chance I have is to find something in a book."

"You're not doing Madam Pomfrey justice," he snarled and glided over to her table, stopping right in front of her, so that she had to tilt her head back.

"But that's what she told me herself two days ago. She said that she couldn't think of anything that might help Harry. He's losing strength, you know."

"Yes, I do know," he said quietly and stepped back a bit. "Madam Pomfrey told me about Potter's condition. She asked for my help."

"Really?" A surge of hope shot through her.

"Yes." He traced his lower lip with his index finger. "There is no potion to help Potter to wake up again. But I can brew a potion that strengthens his resistance."

She beamed. "That would be wonderful, sir."

He started to leave, only to turn around again and ask, "Would you like to help me?"

Hermione spun round. Her elbow knocked into the stack of books, which collapsed with a loud noise. "What?" she almost shouted.

He smirked at her. "I'll only ask you once, Miss Granger."

She leapt from her chair. "Yes, yes, of course I want to help," she said and stumbled after him.

When he reached the door, he held it open to let her pass through first.

***

Professor Snape strode rapidly along the corridor, so that Hermione almost had to fall into a run to keep up with him. After a few yards, he stopped and turned to wait for her. When she had caught up with him, he walked on - this time at a slower pace.

In silence, they went through the corridors, passed the Great Hall and started to climb down the stairs to the dungeons.

Her eyes hidden behind her long hair, she looked up at him.

He stared ahead, a slight scowl on his face. His robes were billowing behind him.

She suppressed a smile. Only a few weeks ago, her schoolmates would have pitied her, if they had seen her walking at Professor Snape's side. It had never been a good sign when the Potions master and a student were on their way to the dungeons.

***

Annotations:

Hermione reads to Harry from the following novel: Kazuo Ishiguro, 'The Remains of the Day', Faber and Faber, London 1993, pp 166, 167.