A Dreamless Sleep

Chapter 7: A Dreamless Sleep

Hermione smiled and nodded as Neville outlined his ideas for an advanced Herbology project. She was determined to focus on her friends and what was going on in the real world and therefore had asked Neville about what he was working on. Last night she had been sorely tempted to leave the Halloween Feast early and to go to bed, but she made herself remain. Her dream Severus had convinced her that it was okay to enjoy their dreams, but she decided it wouldn't hurt if she tried to give her awake self a little more attention.

Hermione concentrated on what Neville was telling her; he seemed to be winding down a bit and would expect her to contribute to the conversation. Before she could speak, they were interrupted by the arrival of the post. She and Neville both looked up as the owls flew around the Great Hall, dropping letters, newspapers and the occasional package.

Hermione received both her newspaper and the latest issue of Ars Alchemica. She bit her lip as she realized she had yet to read last month's issue. It was just another part of her life she had let slip in the last few months. She usually read each issue from cover to cover within a day of receiving it. She decided she would read at least one article tonight before going to bed. It would be good to start exercising a little control over her life.

She idly flipped through the journal as she finished her pumpkin juice, deciding to finish her breakfast and head towards her first class. Then she noticed a familiar article on the use of charms in potions. She gasped, putting her glass back on the table with a quiet thud.

'Are you okay, Hermione?' Neville asked, looking at her with concern.

'Er... Yes, Neville, I'm fine; this is just very interesting,' she said, gesturing to the glossy booklet in her hand, noticing the cover had the same familiar layout and picture.

'I have to go; I'll see you later,' she added as she gathered her book bag and left the table, still clutching Ars Alchemica tightly in her hands.

Snape had shown her that article two days ago in her dreams. There was no way for her subconscious to know what would be in this month's issue two days ahead of time. Everything else she had dreamed of could have been from her own brain, but this article was real. What did that mean about her dreams from the last two months?

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Hermione was grateful she didn't have potions class today. All day she kept thinking of the latest issue of Ars Alchemica. She knew that certain members of the academic community received early issues of various trade journals, so it was likely that Snape was one of them. But she had gotten to look at that early issue. It was exactly the same as the one she had received in the mail today. At least a portion of their dreams had to be based in reality. Snape had to have really been there for that last dream at the very least.

She didn't think it was only for that dream though. She thought over her dreams of the past two months. It had started with the dreamcatcher she had found...

Hermione thought back to the night she had found her dreamcatcher. There had been two of them. She had only been able to pick up one of them. Perhaps Snape had picked up the other. Could the dreamcatchers be enough of a connection to cause them to share their dreams? It went against what Lavender had told her about dreamsharing, but perhaps the magic of the dreamcatchers could make this happen. If this was possible, then she had been sharing her dreams with the real Professor Severus Snape for two months now. She had conversed with him candidly, she had let her guard down around him and most importantly she had slept with him. She felt panic well up within her. She had slept with him! The thought kept repeating itself in her head constantly. She wanted to leave Hogwarts and hide. Her happiness with her new dreams all seemed to be dissolving right in front of her face.

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By the time classes were done for the day and the Great Hall had filled with students for dinner, Hermione's mind was still racing with the implications of her discovery. Regardless of what Lavender had told her, she was sharing dreams with Snape; there was no other explanation for her discoveries. So what do I do now?

Snape of her dreams would never believe her; they had spent countless dreams arguing over who was really dreaming. He would think she was just bringing up the same subject again. She tried to imagine going to Snape while awake and telling him in person, but she immediately disregarded that idea. As sure as she was that they were really sharing their dreams, she just didn't have the nerves to approach him in person.

Hermione couldn't recall ever having a full and open conversation with Professor Snape outside of her dreams. It would be entirely too difficult to discuss their dream relationship face to face, but she couldn't think of what to say in their dreams. He would be expecting to see her tonight and he would most likely realize something was wrong if she acted at all differently around him.

Hermione stood from the table and hurried out of the Great Hall. She had hardly been able to eat a bite of dinner, and she didn't want to be around people right now. She couldn't concentrate on conversations with her classmates when her mind was so occupied.

The infirmary happened to be on Hermione's route from the Great Hall to her room. As she passed it, her mind worried with the upcoming night's dreams, she came to a decision. Just for tonight, she promised herself as she entered the infirmary.

A short while later, after a quick conversation with Madame Pomfrey, Hermione left the infirmary clutching a small vial that contained a dose of dreamless sleep potion. She couldn't take the potion two nights in a row, it was dangerous and highly addictive, but for one night, she would avoid the inevitable and take a break from her dreams. Snape would be angry at her for not showing up tonight, but she just wasn't ready, she needed more time to plan what she was going to say.

Back in her room she forced herself to spend a few hours on homework before changing into her nightgown and drinking the potion. She knew she was putting off the inevitable, but she decided that she would worry about Snape tomorrow.

After drinking the potion, she laid back in bed, waiting for it to take effect. It would only be about ten minutes at the most. She looked up at her dreamcatcher and thought about Snape. She was fairly certain that the dreamcatchers had caused them to share their dreams. It was the only thing that made sense; Snape must have picked up the other one. Perhaps he had hung his up above his head just as she had done. Something about the dreamcatcher's magic was connecting the two people who had possession of the matching pair.

What was he doing right now? Was he already asleep waiting for his dream Hermione to show up? Her last thought before the potion took hold of her was that she would miss Severus tonight.

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Severus had lost count of the times he had paced the floor. He was in the used bookstore from Knockturn alley, but the books held no interest for him. It felt like he had been here for an eternity already, but so far his dreams had not produced his Hermione. Why not? What had changed?

He tried to imagine her appearing right there in the bookstore, but it was no use. When he opened his eyes again, nothing had changed. He felt a bubble of frustration welling up inside of him. He wanted to see her.

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Hermione woke up feeling groggy and disoriented. It was a common symptom of sleeping under the influence of dreamless sleep potion, she had read. The potion, being true to its title, had given her a full dreamless night of sleep, but she didn't feel refreshed or rested. She felt a sense of loss, having not seen Severus last night. She could only imagine how he had felt when she had not shown up.

She sighed as she slowly swung her legs out of bed. She had potions class today and would have to see him. She would have to act as if nothing had changed, he still didn't know they were sharing dreams. She had until tonight to decide what to do. She couldn't take a potion tonight; she would have to face him in her dreams again. Should she tell him?

She made her way into her bathroom and turned the shower on cold. She would need something bracing to clear the cobwebs out of her head. She had a feeling today would be a long day.

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Severus stayed seated behind his desk as his seventh-year Potions class filed in. Hermione Granger was one of the first to enter. She didn't look up at him; she just kept her head down and hurried to her desk. Severus ducked his head and peered at her through his hair. He just wanted to look at her for the next hour. He felt like a starving man who has just seen food. He desperately needed to see her after such a disappointing night. Even if she wasn't the same person as whom he had dreamed up, for now it was enough that she was physically identical.

Not feeling up to lecturing today, he assigned a potion that was most likely too easy for the seventh-year level Potions class. He didn't care; he was too busy trying to slog through his own emotions. He felt despair at the thought that his dreams with Hermione could be over. He knew it was illogical, but he also felt a certain amount of anger. He wanted to walk up to Miss Granger and shake her until she told him why she wasn't in his dream last night. He was heading straight for bedlam. The Miss Granger of his potions class would have no idea what he was speaking of if he mentioned his dreams. Intellectually, he knew this, but emotionally...She looked so much like his own Hermione.

Hermione felt the Potions professor's eyes on her for the duration of the class. He was making her feel clumsy, as she fumbled with her ingredients, too nervous to focus on the rather easy practical lesson of the day. The class was way past the time when they should be working on variations of the common Pepper-up Potion.

She knew why he was watching her. They had often talked about seeing each other in class. They had even made references to the class hours before they were together in their dreams. She had thought it was all in her head, that her brain was just pulling from her memories, embellishing them and adding them to her dreams. She knew better now.

Hermione realized that she knew Snape quite well. Both of them had let their guard down, thinking that their dreams were a personal thing. Not imagining that the person they encountered was really who they appeared to be. Before their relationship had turned physical, they had spent countless hours talking about everything. The conversations, at times, had become quite personal.

He knew her just as well. Perhaps better than Harry and Ron could claim at this time. They knew Hermione as their best friend during their developmental years, but they didn't know the Hermione of today. She was an adult who had just seen a war. She had experienced torture first hand and had her share of nightmares to prove it. It was true she had lived those experiences with Harry and Ron, and therefore all three of them had a bond that would not be broken. But, she had lived through the aftermath all on her own. Snape was the only person who knew that side of her. The only person she had talked about her nightmares and fears with.

Hermione put her head down, letting her hair fall and cover her face as she felt her eyes grow wet. She didn't want to let him go. Neither from her dreams, nor from her life.

Trying to look on the bright side of things, she decided that she should be happy about this. This wonderful person, whom she had dreamed about and fallen in love with, was part of her waking life. Yes, love, she decided. She had fallen in love with her Potions professor. They had fallen in love through their dreams, but now she could have him for more than just her dreams. That is, if he accepted her.

Could she convince him to accept her in life as well as sleep? He could be so stubborn sometimes. Right now he was probably feeling both despair and anger and a large amount of insecurity. He would have assumed that he would never dream of her again, since she wasn't in his dreams last night. Could she find a way to tell him that wouldn't make him shut down on her?

Perhaps she should start by finding a way to prove to him that they were sharing. She would let herself dream tonight and try to convince him that this was different.

Even if it didn't work, she wanted one more night with him.

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