Consequences.
Chapter 5 of 6
Ophelia ImmortalWhat will Severus do when he discovers the identity of Lucius' new "guest"? What has happened, in the meanwhile, to Harry and Ron?
Consequences.
"But as in ethics, Evil is a consequence of Good, so in fact out of Joy is Sorrow born."
Edgar Allan Poe
"Oh, and, Severus... after fixing her, you can play with her too."
Chuckling to himself, he turned his back and started walking down the corridor. "I will be in my study if you need me."
With his eyes still focused on the blond wizard walking away, he took out his wand and summoned his bag of healing potions and ointments. After making sure he had everything he would need, he opened the door and entered the room, softly closing the door behind him. The room was in semi darkness. A lazy wave of his wand gave new life to the dying fire in the grate and lit the many candles in the chandelier, thus enveloping the room in a soft light.
The room itself was chaotic. Clothes were strewn across the floor as well as pieces of a broken vase, which he assumed had been priceless. A few quick spells, and the clothes disappeared while the vase returned to its original state and levitated to what Severus assumed was its rightful place.
"When will he ever learn to play nicely with the ladies?" he muttered to himself, although he knew his friend, despite his sometimes vicious treatment, had never had a shortage of lovers. The bed with the woman of the moment seemed to be in a similar, if not worse, state to the room. Putting his bag down on the bed, he stood back to observe the situation. She seemed to be youngish with a nicely shaped body; her face was covered by her lustrous, long, brown hair, but he made no attempt to look at it. There were far more important matters at hand, such as her pitiful state: blood seeping from her womanhood as well as from her neck; bruises on her thighs and Lucius' seed covering her stomach. Still scowling, he started to work.
"Scourgify," he muttered, removing the seed from her body and the blood from the sheets. "It is high time he learned how to clean up after himself," he spat.
He considered for a while which wound to treat first, concluding that he had better start on her brutalised sex, lest she die through loss of blood. He reached into his satchel and took out a small glass jar, after which he sat down on the bed next to her. Having parted her thighs and assessed the damage, he coated his index and middle fingers and began to slowly caress her torn flesh, the ointment hissing as it healed her wounds. He was quite thankful for her state of unconsciousness, as he could imagine how painful it would be to have such a sensitive part of one's body subject to the burning sensation. When he pushed into her dry channel, however, she whimpered slightly; ignoring her discomfort, he continued with his task, which grew ever more difficult as she reacted to the pain, so much so, she instinctively sought to move away.
He looked up angrily at the wriggling figure and noticed that, thanks to her moving, her face had been uncovered. Instantly, he let out a gasp of surprise, as the girl in front of him was none other than Hermione Granger!
Has the world gone mad? Of all people to be here, it is her? The bookworm of the golden trio, little Miss know-it-all... She is Lucius' new toy? No, no. I must be hallucinating, all of the stress I have experienced must have caused this irrational vision.
Closing his eyes, he opened them again as if expecting there to be someone else on the bed, but much to his chagrin, the girl was still there.
"Lucius, what have you done?" he muttered. "Of all the girls you could have chosen, it had to be her! And to have placed me in such a situation... Were she to wake... Damn you, Lucius!"
His anger grew even more as he recalled the blond wizard's words: "Oh, and, Severus... after fixing her, you can play with her too." His arrogant friend had overstepped the limit this time and would suffer the consequences of his actions accordingly. Snape felt affronted as he thought of the way he had been played with. Glaring down at the unconscious figure, he realised he had yet to finish healing her, and though the worse had been dealt with, it would not do to neglect the other injuries.
Inhaling deeply, he sought to calm himself before reaching once again into his satchel, this time for a phial of violet liquid. Forcing her mouth open, he let a few drops fall onto her tongue. There, now at least I can be certain she will not wake up. Imagine her surprise at opening her eyes and finding me staring at her naked form. It would certainly be most... inconvenient, he thought savagely.
He coated his fingers once more in the ointment and proceeded to dab the bite mark, which hissed and steamed, leaving perfect, unmarred skin behind. He did the same for the bruises on her thighs, meticulously rubbing the salve into her skin, every now and again cursing under his breath whilst thinking of the blond wizard, who was sitting in his study just a floor below.
Once he was satisfied with her condition, he pulled the bed sheet over her and, grabbing his wand and bag, left the room without a backwards glance, slamming the door as he went. Pausing for a moment, he closed his eyes before opening them abruptly. "Lucius," he whispered, voice full of malice.
"Oh, Severus... after fixing her, you can play with her too." Chuckling, he turned his back and started walking down the corridor. "I will be in my study if you need me."
He simply could not wait to see Severus' face when he realised who he was supposed to be healing. Lucius was sure Severus would not feel in the least bit inclined to play with her. If he knew his friend, which he did, he wouldn't want to touch her more than necessary; actually, it was quite possible he would refuse to heal her. That could be problematic...
This whole situation is proving to be problematic, he thought angrily. What am I going to do now? It had seemed so simple before: he had wanted the girl, had obsessed over her, so he had snatched her and used her. So why had he not killed her afterwards? Why had he seen fit to keep that filth alive after he had taken what he had previously been denied? It made no sense at all, and he could not abide anything he could not understand. It irritated him. Made him feel as though he had no control. And a Malfoy is always in control.
He entered his study and sat down at his desk. Summoning his decanter of Ogden's Firewhiskey and a glass, yet again, he poured himself a glassful. He raised it to his lips but did not drink. He sat like that for a few minutes, pondering silently on his encounter with the girl. Why did she bother him so? What did he want of her now that he had taken her? What more could he want?
You wanted her to give herself to you, without having to force her, said the same soft voice in his head as before. You wanted her to want you, to enjoy your coupling.
"Nonsense." he said out loud.
Really?
"It makes no difference to me; her satisfaction, or lack thereof, has no meaning whatsoever."
Yet you remain unsatisfied, that you have already admitted. It seems your self-confessed charms were insufficient for the Mudblood.
"I have nothing to prove... to anyone."
So why then did you not kill her? Did it hurt your ego to have to force yourself on someone so far beneath you? The soft voice cooed. If she has so little meaning, there is no reason to let her live or to have brought her here in the first place?
"Enough!" he cried, losing his patience.
But the voice continued relentlessly, You only wished to prove you could have anything you wanted, such a shame you failed so miserably. But then again, you are becoming quite accustomed to failure, are you not?
The noise of a door slamming violently upstairs drew his attention away from the disturbing inner dialogue.
Suddenly the study door opened with such force that it bounced off the wall and slammed itself shut behind the extremely furious Severus Snape, who had just barged into the room.
"Do you not know it is polite to knock?" Lucius drawled.
"Silence, Lucius! How dare you put me in such a situation! How dare you!" he growled, putting his hands on the oak desk and leaning down to glare at his friend.
"You seem to be overreacting for such a small thing. And please remember I am not one of your students, Severus; do not try to intimidate me in this fashion."
"I cannot believe your nerve! How could you use me like that? Do you think me an imbecile?! To involve me in your own sordid private affairs without giving me any choice in the matter!"
"I fail to see why you are so upset; unless she awoke," he smirked. "Was that the case?"
"No, she did not wake. I gave her a sleeping draught. Do you have any idea what could have happened if she had seen me?"
"She did not have a wand, Severus. In any event, she seemed highly incapable of any form of fighting, magical or physical." He drawled.
"She would no doubt have gone into hysterics."
"And we would not have wanted that to happen, would we? Are you so worried for your former student, Severus?"
"You know perfectly well the answer to that question, therefore why ask it? Am I to imagine you involved me for your own amusement?" he enquired icily.
"Yes, that could be the case. And I was not disappointed by your reaction either."
"You are treading on thin ice," he hissed.
"Do calm yourself, Severus. Sit down, have a drink."
"Do not think you can worm your way out of this: I am furious!"
"Indeed," he replied, softening his gaze. After a small pause, Lucius queried, "Forgive me, Severus, but I cannot help but ask whether you played with her or not."
"Of course I did not, Lucius. I am appalled you even suggested such conduct with her. "
"Yes, of course, how unforgivable of me. Please, take a seat," he said, waving to the chair in front of him which his friend took begrudgingly.
"So, Lucius," he started coldly as he sat down. "I will not question your sexual tastes, nor the fact that you are old enough to be her father; but why did you choose Granger? Did you stop for one minute to think about the consequences of your actions? She is one of the Order! She is a Mudblood! Merlin, she is Potter's best friend! I hope you obtained the Dark Lord's permission before you took action." At the wizard's silence, he rose to his feet. "You didn't? Good God, Lucius! Can you not imagine what is likely to happen now?!"
"Severus, sit down and let me explain from the beginning. A fortnight ago, I had a rather peculiar encounter with her in Flourish Blotts. This encounter left me in a somewhat uncomfortable state. I am ashamed to admit it, but I developed an obsession for her. Wanting to rid myself of my infuriating condition, I concluded that satisfying the nature of my obsession would be enough to end it. So I tracked her down to her lodgings with the aid of an ancient, but very useful, Dark spell. Today I had a white rose placed in her room. The rose was a Portkey which brought her here. I had not informed the Dark Lord as she would have been disposed of once I had taken her, perhaps even handed over to him as a gift; that remained to be decided. Now, however, I find I shall have to improvise since I had not planned on letting her live after I had had my... fill."
The dark-haired wizard was listening in silence, absorbing all the possible information he could draw out of his friend's words, when he came to a surprising realisation.
"Why have you not killed her? She has served her purpose, has she not? Dispose of her before the situation becomes even more dangerous."
"I will, Severus, I will. But first, I want something more from her."
"What more can you possibly want, Lucius?! You have already had her!"
"I am just not satisfied with the outcome. Were I to partake in her again, I could completely eradicate the attraction. Perhaps if she were to want it as well, I would feel completely fulfilled.
"So I plan to seduce her, to make her want me, make her burn with desire. And once I've satisfied her and she me..." He looked his friend in the eye. "I will kill her."
"You cannot be serious. Do you really prize your pride and libido over your own life? If that be the case, please, continue with this inane idea of yours. But leave me out of it. I refuse to be involved."
"There is no need to be so agitated," he retorted. "I have everything under control "
"You certainly do not!" he snapped. "Think, Lucius, of all the things that can go wrong with this little game of yours. Think of the unknown or unpredictable variables at play here and their possible consequences.
"Just how do you propose to achieve this little seduction? Will she stay here, a prisoner in your manor? Not to point out the obvious, but this place is literally crawling with people who loathe her. Your son, Draco, for one. If she sees me, and no doubt it will happen, then... well, I do not need to spell out what will happen to your little scheme then. Also, you frequently entertain guests that may not completely approve of her, like your fellow Death Eaters. And then there is you, Lucius. You have just abducted and raped her. Do you think she will enjoy being in your presence long enough for you to seduce her?"
"How would I know? I have never been raped."
"Stop being so facetious, Lucius! This is no trifling matter!"
"Honestly, do you think I am unaware of these problems? Of course, I realise I face obstacles!" he shouted, slamming his fist on the desk.
After a moment, Severus quietly asked, "Why her, Lucius?"
"I have already told you, I do not know. I just wanted her... "
"And you always get what you want?"
"Most of the time I do," he replied, a touch of warning in his cold voice.
"And gods forbid this is not one of those occasions!"
"Come now, enough of this. Would you care for a drink or not?"
"Very well," he answered stiffly, sitting down once more. "If I must."
"Splendid," Lucius said while summoning another glass. After pouring a large amount into both glasses, he handed one to his friend.
They sat in silence, each sipping the amber liquid, both thinking about what the future would hold.
At the Burrow, there was yet another argument taking place.
"Is there really no way to find them, Arthur?"
"I told you, Molly. They keep changing locations so fast, we can't track them down in time. We'll find them when they want to be found."
"Still on about that, are you?" a young voice said as he entered the room with his twin brother. "Look, Mum. If they want to go off by themselves, let them. They're all of age anyway. They have to make their own decisions."
"George! Have you seen what's in the paper?! We don't even know where Harry is, and he will be one of the main targets!" his mother shrieked at him.
"If Harry has decided to do it, it's up to him. You wouldn't want to keep him locked up hiding like Sirius, would you?"
"No, Fred, but all the same. He can't go around as if nothing's wrong."
"But that's the point. If neither the Ministry nor the Order can find them, then it narrows down the chances that the other side will as well."
"Charlie, dear, You-Know-Who could find them in an instant."
"Mum, arguing about it won't make them come back." Ginny said sadly.
The room fell into an uncomfortable silence. Ginny was absentmindedly stroking Crookshanks, who had been left to her by Hermione. Fred and George had just sat down in the kitchen with Charlie, who was fidgeting with a hole in his shirt. Molly Weasley was making some tea while her husband was just staring at the grandfather clock, which showed that all of his family members were in mortal peril.
"Is anyone here?" a calm voice sounded from outside the door.
"Remus! Tonks! What brings you here?" Molly asked as a middle-aged man with greying hair came through the door, accompanied by a young witch.
"Just wondering if you'd had any news," Tonks asked, eyes darting to the various sad faces around her.
"I'm afraid not," Arthur replied, whose eyes had not left the clock.
"Care for a cup of tea?"
"We can't stay long..." Remus started.
"That would be lovely," Tonks cut in. "It won't hurt to stay just a bit."
"Come on, sit down." Mrs. Weasley said, making some room at the table.
"Molly!"
"What's the matter, Arthur?"
"They're here!" He cried, springing off his chair before opening the door to reveal two figures in the darkness. A small voice spoke out.
"Dad."
With that, there was pandemonium. Arthur Weasley scooped up his son in a strong embrace; Molly was crying nearby; the twins were jumping about, trying to get closer to their younger brother, and Charlie was not too far behind. Remus and Tonks stood staring at the Weasleys in silence, not wanting to intrude on the family reunion. Ginny had already bounded outside to find the other boy out there. "Harry!" she said breathlessly.
"But where is Hermione?" Remus asked, looking from one face to the other. Everyone calmed down instantly; the two boys looked around uncomfortably.
"Inside now!" Arthur whispered hoarsely.
When they saw the two boys in the light, they noticed they were extremely pale and their eyes looked unfocused.
"What has happened?" Molly asked.
"She's gone," was all Ron could reply.
"Let's go through it one last time," Remus said twenty minutes later. "You two left her and went downstairs; after ten minutes, she still hadn't arrived. You went back up to her room, and after you knocked and received no reply, you opened the door to find it empty. Her things were still there, and there were no signs of fighting. The window was closed, and no one had passed you on the stairs."
Harry nodded; Ron kept his eyes on the floor.
"So where have you been 'til now?" Tonks asked "Why didn't you come here straightaway?"
"We've been searching for her. We even went to look for her at her house. You know, it's her birthday; maybe she wanted to see her parents. But she wasn't there. We went looking everywhere we had been recently. And when we got back, her things had disappeared from her room. We asked the housekeeper, but she said she hadn't touched them and no one had come to collect them. It's as if she'd never been there."
Ginny started crying, hiding her face in her hands.
"So, then we decided to come back here, in case you had heard from her."
Everyone just stayed silent. What could they say? What could they do? If she had been abducted by anyone from the other side, she was as good as dead.
"B-but we will find her, right?" Ron said, breaking the silence, eyes searching everyone's faces for some hope. "We must."
"Ron, we'll have to wait. We can only hope that she's alright; we can only hope..." Arthur answered softly.
Ginny let out a wail that carried out into the night.
Author's Note and thanks: Thanking the very lovely Sempra, who has betaed this chapter beautifully. I thank also all of you have read my story so far. If you have any comments, questions or have found something that is not quite right, please leave a review: constructive criticism is very welcome.
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Ophelia-chan! It's Persephone! I found you on here too. Awesome ;D I hope you can start writing again
Prima di tutto, 5 belle stelline a questa storia.Scrivere rape fics non è mai semplice, per il solo fatto che bisogna equilibrare le sensazioni della vittima con quelle del carnefice, e bisogna stare attenti a non glorificare l'atto dello stupro. E tu ci sei riuscita perfettamente, nonostante questa fosse la tua prima storia (e credimi, non è semplice: ho letto le fic di tanti autori alle prime armi [e anche molto più grandi di te] che hanno trattato l'argomento con una superficialità raccapricciante).La cosa che mi è più piaciuta, è stata la scena che ha coinvolto Snape ed Hermione. Di questo capitolo è la mia preferita in assoluto (anche perchè Snape/Hermione è uno dei miei pairings preferiti XD).Comunque, devo ancora una volta congratularmi con te per il modo in cui sei riuscita a mantenere i personaggi IC. A partire da Hermione, e a continuare con Draco, Snape, Lucius e Bellatrix (anche se alcuni di loro non compaiono in questo cap), neppure uno solo di loro ha stonato. Li hai descritti esattamente come la Row ce li ha presentati (se non meglio [anzi, sicuramente meglio]). Tanto per cominciare, gli atteggiamenti e le parole sia di Severus che di Lucius mostrano i personaggi per come sono veramente, senza una sola sbavatura di OOC. Poi, il contesto in cui stanno interagendo non solo è originalissimo, ma anche ben strutturato.Davvero, non so che altro dire (anzi, si, però lo riservo per il prossimo cap :P)Bacioni,la tua coscienza xxx
wow this is an amazing story so far! i cant wait to read more. when are you planning on posting the next chapter?
can't you -just by chance - cut his cock off, please?he has to pay for this. blast this creature.the idea with using he blood to trail her down was good.with what may come Hermine might wish he had finished his curse. Will be interesting to see Snapes reaction on finding his former pupil as his friends toy.
Bene, bene. Ho riletto questo capitolo con gioia, e riflettendoci su più accuratamente, devo ammettere che l'ho trovato attinente a quelle che sono le personalità di Lucius ed Hermione. Lucius ha ancora una volta dato prova della sua natura sadica e contorta, ma allo tesso tempo non ha potuto fare a meno di sfoderare il suo complesso 'narcisistico di onnipotenza.' Non a caso ha voluto che Hermione traesse piacere dalla loro interazione sessuale (per quanto inquietanti le circostanze che hanno portato ad essa siano).Dal canto suo, Hermione non ha potuto far altro che lasciarsi sopraffare dalla propria ingenuità e dal lato oscuro di Malfoy, il quale ha corrotto la sua innocenza in modo oserei dire perverso ed inumano.E' inutile che ti dica che aspetto con ansia il prossimo aggiornamento :)
Prima di tutto tengo a precisare di essere profondamente incazzata... Cioè, un solo commento? Non so se mi spiego. Dio, Franci, il terzo capitolo non solo era stilisticamente più raffinato dei precedenti, ma aveva anche un plot di una tale originalità ed intensità da meritare almeno il quadruplo dei commenti che hai invece ricevuto... Sul serio. La trama di questa storia è estremamente intelligente ed intrigante, e io personalmente non capsico come mai ANCHE QUI la gente sembri non accorgersene.
Vabbè, ma qui si ritorna al discorso trito e ritrito dell'età mentale dei lettori, cosa che credo non sia il caso di riprendere, in caso qui ci sia qualcuno in grado di capire l'italiano :P
A parte questo però, nonostante su questo sito ci siano storie di indubbia qualità, c'è da dire che la maggior parte di esse sono PARECCHIO noiose. Molte sono post-Hogwarts e con trame che seppur ben articolate, distorcono la personalità dei personaggi descritti dalla Row (vediamo per es. un'Hermione che non possiede nemmeno un quarto delle caratteristiche della vera Hermione, o un Piton che pur rimanendo freddo, tutt'a un tratto mi diventa civile e oserei dire 'umano'), e magari è anche per questo che le fic che si sviluppano lungo la direttiva Hogwarts/Voldemort regnante non ricevono l'attenzione e i meriti che meritano (ma che bel gioco di parole).
Anche vero però, è che TPP non è un sito molto frequentato, quindi è molto difficile che possa competere con le recenzioni lasciate su AFF. Però il prestigio che deriva da averci una fic postata non è certo da sottovalutare :)
Mi sono persa in chiacchiere come al solito. Volevo solo dirti che sono fiera di te e del lavoro che stai svolgendo con questa splendida storia. Non mi stancherò mai di ripeterti quanta stoffa ci sia in te. Coltiva le tue capacità fino in fondo, perchè anche se nel tuo cammino incontrerai TANTA gente ignorante che non saprà apprezzarle, troverai anche chi (seppur in minoranza perchè gli uomini intelligenti sono come le mosche bianche) sarà in grado do vedere e riconoscere il tuo infinito talento.
La tua coscienza
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
Cara coscienza,
come al solito i tuoi commenti mi fanno tantissimo piacere, e sono molto felice che tu trovi che io stia migliorando. Come avrai notatato sto cambiando un bel pò rispetto all'originale postato su AFF (dato che, e mi vergogno a dirlo, non usavo proprio il mio cervellino quando scrivevo :p)
Non mi disturba troppo (non ho detto affatto, ne)non ricevere molte reviews, e almeno su questo sito non mi arrivano le solite "Bel capitolo non vedo l'ora del prossimo". Ma almeno i tuoi mi fanno felice. Bah vediamo come va. Almeno sto maturando io, e non può che essere positivo questo.
Tantissimi baci
Franci
p.s. Il capitolo 17 tarderà ancora un pò, sto aspettando di finire di modificare tutti i precedenti capitoli prima di completarlo. Mi spiace per l'attesa :(
Great chapter!! I can't wait to find out what happens next.
Ciao Francesca! E' la tua coscienza che ti parla :PDunque, ora che ho trovato un pò di tempo libero, sono finalmente riuscita a leggere il primo capitolo. Come già sai, i tuoi lavori mi piacciono davvero molto, però c'è una cosa che ho notato, e che credo sarebbe opportuno tu ti soffermassi ad osservare. Esempio: Poor thing. She is quite alluring, it is indeed a pity she is such an abomination, really; I might have even considered a more fulfilling relationship. Merlin, Azkaban must have really lowered my standards. After a beautiful trophy-wife like Narcissa, precious few can be considered her equal, particularly not this lowly female before me… But still, it would be one way of settling matters. The more I think of it the more it seems the perfect retribution: she has humiliated me, it seems only fair to reciprocate.Allora, secondo me i testi risulterebbero più fluidi e decisamente più maturi se invece di descrivere certe scene come pensieri dei personaggi, tu le descrivessi come parte della narrazione.Esempio: Lucius thought she was alluring, but she would have been more desiderable if her blood had been pure.Ovviamente, questo era solo uno stralcio del pezzo che ho citato sopra, ma a mio avviso, orientare la narrazione lungo questa direzione, aumenterebbe notevolmente la qualità formale dei testi.Spero che i miei consigli ti siano d'aiuto per i prossimi capitoli.La tua coscienza.
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
Salve Coscienza :DDa un pò che non ci si sente. Grazie per il consiglio, vedrò cosa posso fare per migliorarmi ancora. Sai che apprezzo moltissimo il tuo parere, e grazie ancora per tutto l'aiuto che mi hai dato, e sopratutto tutte le spinte per portarmi dove sono ora.Con tutto il mio affettoOphelia
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
Salve Coscienza :DDa un pò che non ci si sente. Grazie per il consiglio, vedrò cosa posso fare per migliorarmi ancora. Sai che apprezzo moltissimo il tuo parere, e grazie ancora per tutto l'aiuto che mi hai dato, e sopratutto tutte le spinte per portarmi dove sono ora.Con tutto il mio affettoOphelia
That's our girl, cleaver, resourceful and clear-headed. Lucius didn't have a chance this time...
Hey, I like this chapter. Very well done indeed!you did a great job on showing Hermiones feelings without using to much repetition this time. (found it disturbing last time. sorry)and you draw an interesting picture of all the characters.starts to get more and more interesting.what about ron and harry. are they going to be on stage any more?thank you for the chaptersalva
Someone says Hermione is OOC in this story, and I have to disagree. Even though in the books she's portrayed as a bossy, determined and intelligent girl, this is exactly what she is, that is, just a girl (which means that she's not indestructible). Plus, given the way she was portrayed throughout the 7th book (where she cried on alternative chapters), I don't think Ophelia is describing her OOC. In canon we never had to deal with a 17-years old Hermione Granger who was abducted and raped by a Death Eater, so no one can know how she would have reacted. Moreover, I don't think there's a scheme that illustrates how a woman who's been raped should react, and considering that everyone reacts differently to what happens to them, I really fail to see this OOC-ness people keep talking about. At last, I believe it would be wise to remember that Hermione not only is stubborn and bossy; she's sensible, thoughtful and loyal too, and these are all characteristics that most authors tend to forget or ignore when writing their stories. This is why I appreciate Ophelia's work. She is seeing Hermione as a human being, not as some sort of wonder-woman.
i was really curious about how you would show draco that hermione was at the manor. you did that scene (and every other scene of the story) amazing. and dont listen to anyone who says you are not portraying hermione well. you are showing the human side of her, instead of the perfect warrior princess too often shown by some stories. well done!
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
Thank you for your compliments, as soon as I manage to finish editing the next chapters I can send them to my beta, so please be patient for an update. As to my portrayal of Hermione, I tried to imagine how she would feel. No matter how strong someone is, after a traumatizing expirience such as this one, it would just seem wrong if she could get up and react straight away. I don't know that's my opinion. Anyways, thanks again for the review.
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
Thank you for your compliments, as soon as I manage to finish editing the next chapters I can send them to my beta, so please be patient for an update. As to my portrayal of Hermione, I tried to imagine how she would feel. No matter how strong someone is, after a traumatizing expirience such as this one, it would just seem wrong if she could get up and react straight away. I don't know that's my opinion. Anyways, thanks again for the review.
You have still kept Snape's loyalties ambiguous, he could go either way. Interesting story, I hope Hermione gets a chance for retribution.
What planet does Lucius live on, that he thinks she will ever want him after what he has done. The best he can hope for is that she never gets her hand on her wand when he is within hexing distance!
Fingers crossed, I hope Severus is still on the right side and helps her, and deals to Lucius!
How did Lucius know where to find her?
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
With a tracking spell (I made that one up, I know, but I'm sure somewhere in the Harry Potter Universe it's not impossible). He used her blood to be able to locate her.
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
With a tracking spell (I made that one up, I know, but I'm sure somewhere in the Harry Potter Universe it's not impossible). He used her blood to be able to locate her.
Ha ha , Lucius, serves you right!
Lucius is not as smart as he thinks he is, trying to attack Hermione in public. Even if he hadn't been stopped, there would have been three witnesses to obliviate at least.
Absolutely appaling how you have portraid Lucius. I so want to hex him. Hermione hopefully in yur eyes is made of better stuff than you ahve portraid her. She's not weak. She is a fighter. ahhh. grrrr
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
First of all thanks for reviewing, it gives an author some idea of how their story is for others. Now to you comments:Hopefully appaling is referred to how he acts and not my actual way of portraying him. As for Hermione, though many fics portray her as some form of super-girl, completely unfazed by her surroundings and the situations she lives, I don't think it's too wild a guess to figure she's not. Look at the Harry Potter books, she has difficuly coping with a few situations, as is right for a 17-18 year old girl. She may be a fighter, but can you honestly imagine a rape-victim getting up from the dirt and trying to fight back straight away? It's not weakness it's human. Thanks again
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
First of all thanks for reviewing, it gives an author some idea of how their story is for others. Now to you comments:Hopefully appaling is referred to how he acts and not my actual way of portraying him. As for Hermione, though many fics portray her as some form of super-girl, completely unfazed by her surroundings and the situations she lives, I don't think it's too wild a guess to figure she's not. Look at the Harry Potter books, she has difficuly coping with a few situations, as is right for a 17-18 year old girl. She may be a fighter, but can you honestly imagine a rape-victim getting up from the dirt and trying to fight back straight away? It's not weakness it's human. Thanks again
Oh gods, Lucius is really sick! I can't stand him in this. Can't Severus do anything? and Ron and Harry, they haven't got a clue to go by... and Hermione - I really feel for her. How can anyone really think being raped like that that she will sudden'y want Lucius unless he drugs her to do so. This is really sick.
Oh ewe!!!! I want to rip him apart!! If this turns into a rape then she falls for him story, I'll puke.
Oh I loved the use of the dream, backstory and present to give us a full understanding of what's happening! Really good.
Oh, I want to hex him for his mistreatment of Blinky! The little elf was only concerned for him, the horrible prat! It's too bad Hermione has gotten under his thick hide - he's not good enough for her. I hope Hermione knows better to stay away!
Poison is my favorite song!!!! I enjoyed both these chapters, and that makes me enjoy them even more lol :D