Getting the Specifics

Hermione looked down at the almost perfect Defense score she had earned on Snape's test. He was swooping about the classroom, passing out their tests while muttering about a class full of dunderheads. She couldn't believe that this man, this 'black bat' was her soul mate. She had asked Lavender what the proper definition of a soul mate was within the magical world. Lavender had told her it was 'the one person in the world whom you are destined to find happiness with.'

Snape was the one person who was supposed to make Hermione happy? It seemed impossible to her.

It had been one week since she had made that discovery, and she was still trying to wrap her mind around the idea. She tried to look on the bright side; if he was her soul mate, there must be something good about him, something about him that would be appealing to her. Otherwise, how could they be destined to make each other happy?

Hermione took out a small handheld Muggle notebook and a quill. As Snape stalked around the classroom, she decided to make a list of everything she knew about him.

Before Hermione could complete her list of what she didn't know about her soul mate, her notebook was torn out of her hands. She looked up and stared right into the obsidian eyes of said soul mate. She blinked a few times and swallowed audibly.

'Er... Professor Snape...' she started, trying to think of an excuse.

'Miss Granger, I apologize if my lesson is boring you. What in the world could cause a know-it-all like you to get so distracted?' he asked sarcastically as he looked at the small notebook he was now holding.

Hermione started to chew on her bottom lip as she watched his eyes move across the page as he read her list. She held her breath when she saw his eyes widen, and he quickly looked back up at her.

'Detention tonight, Miss Granger, right after dinner. From now on, pay attention in my class!' he said coldly before striding back towards his desk. He still held her notebook.

Severus Snape sneered as he watched his seventh-year Defense class scurry out of the room. It was always the same as soon as he had dismissed the class; it seemed as if the students were in a race to leave his classroom first. It was always amusing to watch, and he held back a chuckle as Longbottom tripped in his haste to leave the room.

As soon as the last student had left, Snape opened his desk drawer and pulled out Miss Granger's notebook.

He read through the list slowly. He wasn't surprised by most of it. He had found lists about him in the past. Usually they consisted of a list of all the 'names' that the students called him behind his back. Once he had found a list, in the possession of the Weasley twins, that had been entitled, 'Top Ten Ways to Annoy Snape.' The number one way to annoy him was to write a list of 'ways to annoy him' and get caught with it in his class.'

Severus had bitten the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing when he read it. He had only taken twenty points from each boy, secretly enjoying their ironic sense of humor.

He wouldn't have suspected it of Miss Granger; it seemed more like something her idiotic friends would do. During class, when he had seen that she had written a list about him, he had felt a small pang. He had always thought that she at least had respected him.

He had been doubly surprised when he had read the content of the list. He read the numbers ten and eleven again; 'Bloody brilliant' and 'He has a nice voice, and those eyes are killer.'

So, Miss Granger liked his voice and his eyes... that was interesting. He wondered what had prompted her to make out the list in the first place. She had earned an almost perfect score on her test, no reason to be angry with him. He would have to wait until her detention in order to determine her reasons.

***

Hermione took a deep breath as she stood in front of the door of Snape's office.

At least, she thought to herself, his office wasn't still located in the cold dungeons.

She knocked twice on the door and pushed it open as Snape looked up from his desk and watched her enter.

Once Hermione had taken a seat in front of his desk, Snape opened a drawer and took out her notebook. He looked at her silently for a moment before speaking, his eyes boring into hers.

'Perhaps you would care to explain the meaning of this list, Miss Granger,' he said in a low voice.

'Sir, I don't think you would believe me if I did,' she said nervously.

He raised one of his eyebrows, and she could tell he wouldn't be satisfied with that answer.

She sighed audibly before answering him.

'Sir, do you know anything about Arithmancy?' she asked.

'Miss Granger, I asked you a question,' he said.

'I know, sir, I am trying to explain. Do you know how Arithmancy works?'

He regarded her for a moment before nodding his head.

'Well, I was thinking the other night about altering Arithmancy to make it more accurate, in case someone needed to find a more specific answer, rather than just getting percentages.'

She reached into her book bag and retrieved her other notebook, thinking of showing him her initial calculations.

'See, if I used Muggle mathematics, I could divide the numbers and come up with a few options....'

'Miss Granger, you will make your point now; I don't need to hear about your calculations,' he interrupted her in a curt tone of voice.

Hermione snapped her mouth shut before she could babble about the finer points of Muggle division.

'Professor Snape, I did some calculations and found out that you are my soul mate,' she said in a whisper.

The professor didn't speak for a full minute, and what little color may have been in his face faded completely.

'That is preposterous!' he burst out, startling the young witch after being silent for so long.

'I was bothered by it too, sir. That's why I made a list. I figured if we were going to end up together...'

He interrupted her before she could finish. 'We are not going to end up together, Miss Granger,' he said in a harsh voice. 'Your calculations were wrong.'

She reached towards her notes once more. 'Sir, if you would look at my calculations...'

'Miss Granger, that is enough of this nonsense. You will spend the remainder of your detention grading all of the first-years' essays. They were assigned four feet on the differences between the Asian and the African Manticores. I trust you are up to the task?' he finished as he gazed down his nose at her.

She nodded once, and he indicated a large stack of parchment near the edge of his desk.

She looked at him for a moment more, but he had already turned his attention back to the parchment in front of him. He leaned towards the paper as he wrote furiously in his distinctive, spiky handwriting, obviously having dismissed her from his mind.

She sighed once as she settled at the nearest desk and started reading through the first essay. She knew her calculations were correct. Snape was her soul mate. She didn't like it, but she could accept it. She wasn't going to pass up the opportunity to be with the one person who could make her happy. She gritted her teeth in determination. Now I just need to convince Professor Snape of the fact.

Three hours later, Hermione put down her quill and tilted her head side to side, trying to ease the pain that had developed after reading the first twenty essays and persisted through the rest. She now had a much better understanding of why Snape referred to most of his students as dunderheads. Most of the essays she had read were barely legible, some students not even bothering to use a Spell-Check Quill. She stacked the essays into a neat pile and carried it to Snape's desk.

'I'm all finished with these, sir,' she said.

As she leaned forward to hand him the stack of parchments, she couldn't help but look down at the parchment he had been working on all evening. He was working on a potion; she could see some of the ingredients that were commonly used in a number of potion bases. She leaned in to get a closer look, momentarily caught up in the chance to learn something new.

'Very well, Miss Granger, you are excused,' he said, making her flush guiltily and look back up at him. He had raised one eyebrow and was looking at her pointedly.

She stood there for a moment watching him.

'Miss Granger, you are excused. Please return to your dormitory,' he said in an impatient voice.

'Professor, if you would please just look at my calculations you would see...' she started to say, trying once more to convince him.

'That is enough!' he said in a rough voice, standing up abruptly and towering over her. 'I don't want to hear anything more about this, Miss Granger. I refuse to listen any further about your deluded fantasies!'

Hermione involuntarily took one step back when he had stood so suddenly. She gulped once as her eyes widened at his show of temper.

When she opened her mouth to apologize, he held up his hands.

'Not another word. Out!' he said, pointing to the door.

Hermione gathered her things and fled.

I can't believe I'm destined to be with such a prat!

**

Hermione decided to take the rest of the night off from studying. She was at least a week ahead of her classes, and she had more important things to do. She had to plan her future. If Professor Snape was the only person who could make her happy, then she was determined to be happy.

The first thing Hermione did was to re-write her lists. Snape had never returned her notebook, and she needed to compile what she knew about him. In the end, her list of what she didn't know about him was the longer of the two.

Hermione turned to the next page in her notebook. If she and Professor Snape were going to make each other happy for the rest of their lives, she would need to get to know him better. She barely knew anything about the man, and she was sure he knew even less about her.

During detention, he had made it clear that he wouldn't willingly listen to what she had to say about this. She couldn't exactly start hanging around his office, hoping he would talk to her. She chewed on her lower lip as she thought about her recent detention. Grading papers was certainly much better than some of the horrible things Snape had assigned to Harry and Ron when they had detention with him. It really hadn't been that bad, except for when he got mad at the end ... when she tried to show him her notes again.

Her eyes widened, and she smiled.

That's it! she thought to herself. I'll just get detention again.

If she got detention enough, he would have to get more comfortable with her. Maybe he would even get used to her help with grading papers. He would start to feel grateful for her help, and maybe he would start opening up with her and she could get to know him. It's perfect!

She smiled to herself as she thought of her plan and decided to get ready for bed. She needed an early night so she could come up with creative ways to get herself landed in detention.

Hermione sat in class, watching as Snape demonstrated how to block an object flying at his head without using his wand. It seemed to Hermione to be a basic Protego spell. He asked various volunteers to launch a teacup at his head, and with a flick of his wrist, the cup was broken at his feet. Hermione sighed; she was waiting for him to pair of the students to work on the Protego on their own. The general chaos that usually occurred during their practical application would provide a perfect cover for the Gryffindor witch to implement her plan.

Finally, Professor Snape called for them to partner up and practice the new spell. Hermione had deliberately taken a seat in the middle of the room, the one closest to the corner where the Slytherins traditionally sat. As Neville positioned himself opposite her, she made sure she was standing close enough to Pansy and Draco as they successfully performed their spells. Neville was breathing hard as he tried to wandlessly lift their glass bowl and launch it towards Hermione.

Hermione quickly lifted her hand and dropped it down while whispering a spell. Draco's trousers fell down as her hand dropped.

A good use of wandless magic! she thought to herself as Draco's face turned red, and the class erupted into laughter when they noticed him standing with his trousers pooled around his ankles.

He was wearing silk boxer shorts in glaring Gryffindor red. He hadn't figured out who had dropped his trousers, so he looked around the class with narrowed eyes as he hastily pulled his pants back up.

Snape tried to call order in the class, but Pansy's trousers went down next. Hermione giggled as the Slytherin girl shrieked and tried to cover up the large 'granny' pants that were holding in her tummy.

Without waiting to see how the class was reacting, Hermione quickly flicked her hand back towards Draco as his trousers dropped again. Hermione smiled as he yelled this time and tried to grab for his trousers and take a step towards Pansy at the same time. He tripped, and they ended up as a mass of unclothed tangled limbs on the floor. Hermione could hear Harry and Ron roaring with laughter behind her.

Hermione deliberately crossed her arms and let a self-satisfied smile show on her face. That should be enough for Snape to think she wasn't deliberately trying to give herself away as the culprit.

The laughter died down as Snape approached the two students still tangled in a heap on the floor. He used wandless magic to Levitate Draco off of Pansy. Both Slytherins immediately pulled up their trousers and tried to regain some dignity.

'Who is responsible for this?' Snape asked in a low voice as his eyes scanned the classroom.

Hermione waited a beat and then dropped her arms and started looking up at the ceiling.

Snape stalked towards her and looked down at her menacingly.

'Miss Granger! Are you responsible for this?' he asked.

'Sir? Er....'

'Don't try to lie to me, Miss Granger!'

She was looking around the room as if she would see a means of escape.

'Er... well, yes, sir,' she finally said in a small voice, hanging her head.

'Well, the class know-it-all is playing pranks now. What do you have to say for yourself, Miss Granger?'

Hermione quickly thought about how she could answer that. What would Harry say?

'Well, Professor... I was simply demonstrating some wandless magic and how it could be used for defense. I was able to incapacitate both Draco and Pansy at the same time!' she said, trying to keep her voice innocent.

Hermione thought she could see Snape's left eye twitch in anger and decided to stop pushing him.

'Fifty points from Gryffindor and detention for two weeks, Miss Granger ... including Saturday and Sunday nights. Report back here at seven,' he said in a silky voice as a murmur of complaint came up from the Gryffindors at the large amount of points he was taking.

'Class dismissed. Leave now!' he said sharply as he stalked towards his office.