Chapter 2: Do I Dare? How He Dares!

Today would be my first day of school. Strangely, I was looking forward to it, despite my trepidation about being "the new girl." Something about a fresh new year of school had always filled me with anticipation; I wondered how I would enjoy my classes and what kind of teachers I would have. This year, though, I wondered also about new friends and especially about Daniel. Despite what had happened between us, I couldn't wait to see him again. I hoped we would have classes together! Pulling out my schedule, I looked again to see what classes I would be taking. The first day, an "A" day, I would be taking Speech and Debate, Humanities, and Calculus. I had the fourth and final period off, which was nice, as I would be able to continue working at the movie theatre after school on those days. Tomorrow would be a "B" day, and I would have World History, Theater, my free period, and then English.

The school day began with no sight of Daniel anywhere. When I arrived in Humanities, I was relieved to see Krissy. I had been feeling alone and friendless, having not known anyone in my Speech class. At least I had Krissy in three of my classes. Krissy and I had compared schedules at work the past weekend and learned that we had Humanities, Calculus, and World History together!

Humanities was an interesting subject. We would be discussing various societies and cultures. The teacher, Miss Heibrit, gave us an overview of the class. Then we were allowed to talk amongst ourselves for awhile about our own cultural traditions. After awhile, many students started to talk of other things. Four people sat at my table: Krissy and I sat next to each other, and across from us sat a blonde haired, fair-faced girl named Karina and a girl named Marissa with mouse-colored, curly hair. Karina was talking about a guy she liked, and I listened to this interesting gossip. I knew nothing about anybody at this school!

"His best friend, Zach, said that he is actually looking to get into a relationship with someone!"

"With you, most likely," answered her friend, Marissa.

"Well, maybe not," Karina pouted. "Apparently, a lot of girls like him, and he can't decide who he likes back!"

"That sounds familiar," I piped in.

"Oh, really?" she asked, interested.

"Yeah, unfortunately I like a guy just like that."

Karina said, "Yes, it's frustrating, isn't it? I like the most popular guy in school. I'm pretty sure he'll see that he likes me too. It's only proper for the most popular guy in school to date the most popular girl." She flipped her hair back and turned to talk more with Marissa.

I turned to look at Krissy, asking for confirmation of this bold, not-so-humble assertion. Krissy rolled her eyes in answer. I laughed. Krissy said, "As far as your crush goes, don't worry, Janey. You and Daniel got to know each other pretty well over the summer. I bet he asks you out soon!"

I smiled in thanks for her assurances, but across the table from us, Karina froze in her conversation. She turned to look at me and said, "Daniel? Daniel Pajerty?" I nodded in assent. Her jaw dropped, and she asked, "Daniel is the guy you like?"

Feeling this wasn't going to be pretty, I answered, "Yes . . ."

"Ha!" she scoffed. "Well, that's too bad for you. Daniel is into me and has been since last year. You should just get over him."

"What? I thought you said he couldn't make up his mind! How does that make him interested in you? What makes you think he wouldn't like me?"

Karina smirked and said, "Look, you don't know anything. You just got to this school. This is my domain. If I want Daniel, I'll get him, and there isn't anything you can do about it."

"We'll see," I muttered. Thankfully, the bell rang to end class, and Krissy and I hurried out of the classroom.

"I can't believe this!" I declared in exasperation.

"Karina can be real nasty. She always gets what she wants too. This can't be good for you," said Krissy.

"So now you think I've got no chance?" I asked pleadingly.

"Well, now is your chance to find out. He's down the hallway there," she said as she pointed the way.

I looked, and sure enough, there was Daniel at the end of the hallway, chatting with . . . Zacharias? Oh no! I thought. He's guy I met at the movies this summer! If they are friends, that means I told Daniel's friend how I feel about him!

"No way can I talk to him now!" I said to Krissy.

"Just do it. We have to walk that way to get to our Calculus class."

"No . . . later. I'll explain why later. Let's just go and hope he doesn't see me."

We had just passed the spot where Zacharias and Daniel were standing, and I was about to turn the corner to go down the adjoining corridor. Zacharias called out, "Hey, we could ask Janey."

I stopped and turned. "Nice to see you again, Zacharias," I said without holding back the sarcasm. "Hey, Dan," I added much more softly, trying not to blush.

"Hi, Janey," Daniel said. He looked at his friend and said, "I didn't know you two had met before."

"Well, we certainly have," Zacharias said.

My head was spinning, and my heart was thumping at the sight of Daniel casually leaning against the lockers and looking at me.

Zacharias continued, "We talked at the movie theatre this summer, and she told me all about how much she adores you." Zacharias turned to look at me, an evil grin spreading across his face. "As president of Dan's fan club, Janey, could you please tell us who all fancies Daniel, here? You see, we are trying to find him a girlfriend. The best girlfriend."

Stunned, I stood frozen. My breath stopped, and tears formed in the corners of my eyes. How could anyone be so cruel, teasing me right in front of him? Daniel was looking at me with a curious expression. Damn him, I thought. He acts as if he didn't already know I like him! Quickly tearing my focus away from Daniel, lest he see the hurt etched in my face, I stood my ground and stared at Zacharias. "Why don't you stop worrying about finding Daniel a girlfriend? If he can't decide which girl to choose, that's his problem. You should be worrying about yourself because you have no one to choose from!" I stormed down the next hallway, forgetting all about Krissy, who had been standing next to me.

I found my Calculus class and sat down. Krissy came in just as the bell rang and sat next to me. She smiled reassuringly, but I just looked down at my desk, feeling miserable. Mr. Siens, our teacher, began to go over the class curriculum for the year. All the students were stifling giggles at Mr. Siens' atrocious outfit. He wore a blue and yellow, horizontally striped, collared shirt. The waist of his pants came up well past his navel and were secured in place by red and purple suspenders. You could just see his many colored, striped socks between the bottom of the pant legs and the surprisingly normal, brown work shoes. With great enthusiasm, he described the mathematics we would be learning as if their perfection and beauty were somehow more artistic than scientific. He asked the class at large a question just to see if anyone knew the answer. When a student sitting across the room from Janey answered, Mr. Siens jumped up and nearly shouted, "Yes! Yes! That's right! Now then . . ."

I rolled my eyes at the teacher's exuberance for his subject and returned to dwelling on my situation with Daniel...which seemed to be more and more perilous as the days went by. Soon, Krissy passed me a note. After checking to see our teacher was looking the other way, I opened it and read:

Don't worry about that prat, Zach. I hung back and berated him a little more,

but you did a good job yourself with that comment you gave him! =)

Daniel apologized for Zach being a jerk and said he hopes you're alright and not mad at him.

He also told me that he thinks he does know who he wants to ask out

but that he's not sure if she really likes him!

I think he means you, but he's an idiot if he doesn't know how you feel by now!

Anyway, he said he'd make clear to everybody by tomorrow who it is that he likes!

So cheer up!

Tomorrow! Tomorrow! He'll love you tomorrow . . . It's only a day away . . .

---

Later that evening, I sat at home in my room, filled with anticipation for the next day. I hope he likes me! I thought desperately. I'll find out for sure tomorrow . . . I laid back on my bed, envisioning a scene where Daniel approaches me in front of a corridor full of students, declares his undying love for me, followed by a kiss that is so intense I just buckle and fall into his strong arms . . . Shortly into this exciting fantasy, reality grabbed me and pulled me back into the world where doubt crept in, and I refused to have too much hope. What if he was actually interested in somebody else? What if it wasn't me after all? For the second time since I had met Daniel, I suddenly felt like all I wanted to do was just ask him. I would tell him how I felt and see how he responded. Normally, I would never have been so forward with a guy, but Daniel drove me crazy! I would go mad with jealousy, seeing him in the arms of another girl just because I didn't take the chance to make a move first. I didn't think I could confront him at school and risk being embarrassed before my new classmates, and we didn't work together again until Friday . . . but I could send him an E-mail! I sat down at my computer and composed it.

Dear Daniel,

Hey, how are you?

I need to tell you something . . . I like you.

There...I said it.

I needed to tell you just in case you didn't know, just in case you thought all our flirting was innocent and didn't mean anything.

I really love being around you! We have so much fun at work together, but I wonder if we could have more?

I need to know how you feel.

If there's nothing here for you, then I hope we can still be friends.

Please let me know, Janey

I stared at what I had written for several minutes, looking for a way to make it better so I wouldn't feel so embarrassed. Finally, my pride...or my embarrassment, I wasn't sure which...made me decide to save the E-mail to my "Mail Waiting to be Sent" box. I clutched my hands over my face. Then I decided to write a simpler message instead:

Daniel, hey, how's it going?

Are you enjoying school so far?

It's been weird for me, not knowing anyone except you and Krissy.

Maybe you can help me meet more people . . .

Well, I'll talk to you soon hopefully.

Also, there's something I want to ask you about.

...Janey

"Alright," I mumbled to myself, "this I can actually send." Yawning, I sent the E-mail, knowing that once I did, I'd be roped into talking to Daniel. I went to bed, eager for the next school day but dreading it at the same time.

The next morning, I headed to my first period class, World History. Already it promised to be my favorite class. While history could be really interesting sometimes, it wasn't normally my favorite subject. My favorites were usually English and Theater. No, it wasn't the subject that was so exciting . . . It was Daniel, who I saw heading into the classroom ahead of me! As the students entered the room, the teacher took our names and directed us to our assigned seats. I sat down and pulled out my textbook, notebook, and pen as the rest of the class filed in.

Soon the class had all settled down, and my eyes were drawn to rest on Daniel, sitting in a desk a couple rows ahead and over to the right. I thought about how extremely hot he looked today and felt that warm tingling rush up through my body. He was wearing dark blue jeans and a black shirt cut tight against his muscular torso and arms. His long hair was swept to the side, his bangs adding an allure of mystery to him. He turned his head and scanned the room. His eyes swept past me and then flickered back, apparently having noticed me staring at him. I strongly resisted the urge to turn my head away, but instead, rather courageously I thought, I continued to gaze at him. As my eyes met his piercing ones, I smiled, and he smiled back. There was something different in his smile, in his eyes. It was all very soft...no traces of his normal mischievousness. Time stood still for a moment, or several moments possibly, as we gazed at each other, smiling, until Mr. Bragin called the class' attention to the day's work. Daniel turned to face the front of the class again, and my heart pounded inside my chest.

What was that? I wondered. It felt as if something had just happened between us. What did his smile mean? Had he received my message already? Had he guessed at how much I liked him? Could he possibly have reciprocated my feelings?

Remembering not to feel too hopeful, I let out an audible sigh that was loud enough to turn the heads of the students sitting nearby. I thought I might even have seen Daniel turn, but when I looked, he was actively engaged in what the teacher was saying.

"Bored already, Janey?" smirked Krissy, who sat in the desk next to mine. "It's only the second day of school!" She was whispering softly, so the teacher wouldn't hear. Then she added, her teasing smirk even bigger, "I saw you and lover boy exchanging looks!"

"Shut up!" I hissed back, but she only smiled bigger, and I couldn't help grinning back this time. "Alright . . . so what? It doesn't mean anything."

"Mmmhmmm . . ." taunted Krissy knowingly, "except that you two want each other!"

"Shhhhhh!" I whispered warningly. Unfortunately, this time my whispering carried over, and the teacher heard.

"Janey Parker, do you have something to share with us that is more important than my explanation of what you will be expected to learn in order to pass this quarter?"

"Oh, no...Um, I'm sorry," I stammered. I wasn't used to admonishments from teachers. With my strait A's and love of learning, my teachers and I normally got on quite well. This year wasn't boding well for making good first impressions!

"Quite. Well, Miss Parker, if you want to excel in my class, I suggest you focus your attention more on the lessons and less on your love life," said Mr. Bragin. He turned back to the overhead projector and pointed to the next item on his outline of discussion. "Furthermore," he continued as if there had been no interruption, "we will be covering . . ."

Despite his reprimand, I still wasn't listening. I buried my face in my hands for a moment, wondering just how much of our whisperings our teacher had overheard and how many students had overheard as well! I snuck a look at Daniel, who was scribbling down the notes from the overhead rather furiously. Krissy caught my eye and smiled slightly, apologetically. I gave a little shrug and then resigned myself to listening to Mr. Bragin. I would have to worry about what Daniel thought of me later.

Still, I couldn't help feeling hopeful at Krissy's comment, "You two want each other!"

It was clear what I wanted, and maybe Krissy could see what I wouldn't allow myself to see...that he wanted me too! Swooning, I copied down the next line of the overhead. I would simply have to make myself talk to him and find out how he felt. I just can't stand not knowing! I thought furiously. Either way, I need to know!

When the bell rang, I started to put my books back in my bag when I noticed Daniel hadn't moved to get up yet. Maybe if I stalled and hung back a bit, I could get a chance to talk to him without any of our classmates around. Daniel was putting his things away slowly, and most of the class had left. I had just zipped up my bag when I heard Mr. Bragin say, "Miss Parker, if you would please, come talk to me for a few minutes. I will write you a pass, so you are excused from being late to your next class."

Damn it, I thought. I am in trouble, and I lost my chance to speak to Daniel alone! Daniel had finished packing up and threw a quick, furtive look at me as he cantered out the door.

"Um, Mr. Bragin . . . I'm sorry about..." I started to say.

"Nevermind that," he cut in. "I have records here of your stellar performance at your old school. You may be able to win an academic scholarship for college with these grades, if you can keep them up. You'll also need letters of recommendation from your teachers, so mind you work extra hard in my class," he said with a hint of a smile.

"Thanks, Mr. Bragin. I certainly will."

"Yes, well, it seems your old school's History curriculum is taught a bit differently than the one here. You may be missing some lessons that are a prerequisite for this class, which are normally taught at the junior level at this school. By your next class, I will give you a list of reading material to get you caught up."

"Oh, okay. That's not a problem. I want to make sure I do well in this class."

Mr. Bragin smiled and wrote out a pass for me, "Hurry along now. Enjoy the rest of your day."

I left the room and rushed to my Theater class, held in the school auditorium. The teacher, Ms. Purtkis, examined my pass and had me join a small group of students working nearby. The class had been separated into small groups, each working on their own skit. On the far side of the room, I could see Daniel working in a group with some other guy and a girl. Daniel was in this class too! Oh, wow! How I was going to love the days I had World History and Theater! Slightly resentful Ms. Purtkis hadn't put me in Daniel's group, I turned to my own, and we began reading over our skit which was a scene from Oscar Wilde's "The Importance of Being Earnest." My group informed me that we were going to practice today and at next class we would perform our skits for everyone. We began practicing our roles, and I was back in my element. How I had loved being in the school plays at my old school. Acting was such fun!

Towards the end of the period, I glanced at Daniel across the room. He was locked in an embrace with the girl from his group, a pretty blonde . . . NO! I realized who she was...Karina! My apparent competition for Daniel's affections had her arms wrapped around his neck with a huge grin on her face. They had better be acting their script! I thought furiously.

Just then, her squealing laugh echoed through the auditorium, and I heard her say, "Oh Daniel!" Doubting very much that Daniel was playing a character named Daniel, my stomach lurched, and I grabbed up my bag just as the bell rang. I walked past the pair on my way toward the exit. I saw her still hanging on him, batting her eyelashes, and became momentarily blinded by hot tears building up in my eyes. In my haste to leave, I slammed into the wrong side of the double doors, and the locked door thrust me back so that I nearly fell. I heard laughter. Trying to blink back the forming tears, I turned and saw Zacharias smirking. He turned to Daniel and laughed. "I think she's jealous. What do you think?"

Before Daniel could even open his mouth to say anything, I turned, seething, on Zacharias. "Jealous? Who am I supposed to be jealous of?"

"Oh, come on!" he retorted. "It's obvious you've got it bad for Danny boy here. We know you'd love to be standing where Karina is right now."

"Really? You think I want to be hanging off someone who laps up affection like a dog? Who doesn't even know who or what he wants? Who is so arrogant that he thrives off other people fawning over him without any regard to how they feel? I'm not jealous of her. In fact, I feel sorry for her because he will never take her as seriously as she hopes."

Karina was the first to react. She said in a belittling tone, "Honestly, girl, just because he won't take you seriously, doesn't mean he won't be serious about anyone else."

Zacharias laughed heartily, and I pointedly refrained from looking at Daniel. I said, "I'm done with this," and turned around to exit, this time through the right door.

As I reached the doorway, I heard Karina say sweetly, "I guess that means you're all mine now." Helplessly, I turned once more and saw her hugging him tightly, Daniel facing towards the doorway where I stood with a strange look on his face. It might have been confusion or anger, but it was over too quickly to tell because he loosened from the embrace to plant his lips on Karina's.