Purple-Pink #6

Disclaimer: Not mine; no money.

Thanks go to my beta, Southern Witch 69.

Purple-Pink #6

April 7th, 5:28 pm

“Well, Ms. Granger, as you can see, every bit of resistance we have been able to accomplish up to this date has merely functioned as a minor annoyance to the Pink Party.”

My laughter prevents me from answering him.

Goddess – Fred and George were the two ‘headless’ streakers at Umbridge’s May Day speech last year! The Engorgement Charms they must have used – they were HUGE! And they had dyed their pubic hair as well – I distinctly remember it being black. Oh – of course – Back in Black!

I start laughing even harder, doubling over and holding my stomach.

And the look on her face! Like she’d swallowed a vat of bubotuber pus! I’m still in shock that the Think Pink Brigade didn’t try to arrest her for not having a Proper Smile for a full five minutes.

Tears are beginning to leak from my eyes, and I’m gasping for breath. I can’t remember the last time I’ve laughed like this.

“If you feel ready to proceed, I would like to discuss long-term strategy with you, Ms. Granger.” His expression is almost the full sneer I remember from my student days.

I wave at him weakly and gulp for air. “Of course … just … another minute.” I blot my eyes with a lace-covered handkerchief – one of Molly’s Community Service projects – and try to stop remembering the way their engorged members bounced and swayed.

Just that thought alone is enough to reignite my amusement, but at least the duration is shorter this time.

Finally, I’m able to straighten up. I know my cheeks must be flushed, and I can’t get the wide grin to go away, but I find I don’t care.

Snape is watching me intently again. In fact, if I didn’t know how much he hated the Pink Party, I’d be convinced that he’s a Watch Wizard. Every time I’m near him, his eyes follow me carefully, as if recording my every action, my every expression.

“If you’re quite through, may we continue?” he drawls sardonically.

I nod and take a few more breaths. “Really, Snape, I’m sure your addition of a lust potion to the water this past November was just as effective, if not more so, than the twins’ efforts on May Day.” Unsuccessfully, I attempt to swallow another chuckle. “I distinctly remember that on November 5th the Think Pink Brigade was overwhelmed and had to leave off arresting couples for Inappropriate Affection in the streets. And Lee, crooning love songs using the Sonorus Charm, didn’t hurt either.”

He looks somewhat mollified as the sneer changes to his now habitual smirk. It’s a surprisingly good look on him.

“But that does leave me with one question,” I say.

“Go on.”

“What was Ginny’s project?”

It’s Snape’s turn to chuckle. “If you hadn’t guessed, it was actually her who masterminded the entire stunt Fred and George pulled at the May Day speech last year. She mapped out their route, performed the Levitation Charm that lifted them so that the maximum number of spectators would get an ‘eye full,’ as she so charmingly put it, and arranged the Portkeys that brought them safely back here at the end. She’s quite a deft hand at Charms.”

“Yes, she’s wonderful.”

And the Levitation Charm was absolutely brilliant – ‘eye full,’ indeed!

I try to suppress my chuckle. “And on that note, I put in my request to be changed to Ginny’s Elegant Embroidery Committee. We should be able to have more contact that way, or at least we won’t have Community Service on alternating nights any longer.”

“Excellent. I will have to see if some of my contacts in the Ministry can facilitate matters.” Seeing my surprised expression, he smirks and replies, “Why, yes, Ms. Granger, there are other, somewhat informal members of Back in Black who prefer to remain anonymous at this time. While not active in our larger campaigns, they nonetheless provide myriad smaller services that make much of what we do possible.”

One of them obviously must be Arthur.

Snape pulls out his pocket watch, flips it open, and hmms quietly. “Now, if you will excuse me for a moment, Ms. Granger, there’s something I need to attend to.”

“Of course. May I be of any assistance?”

His smirk actually resembles a small smile as he replies, “Indeed, you may. If you’ll follow me.”

We leave the sitting room via the door at the far end of the room. I knew Snape lived at headquarters, but I hadn’t given much thought as to the arrangements before now.

The laboratory is small yet well equipped. Three cauldrons simmer gently over the lowest of flames on the central bench. One is perfectly clear and colorless, another is an almost blood red, and the third is a murky pale blue.

Snape moves to the right and gestures me forward. “So, Ms. Granger, can you identify these?”

I turn my face to him. “The first is Veritaserum, and the second is a lust potion, though I’m not precisely sure which one – they weren’t exactly taught, now were they?”

His smirk is firmly in place, and his eyes are intense. “It is Libidinosus Potion, Ms. Granger. Are you familiar with its properties?” His voice seems even deeper than usual as he says this last bit.

“If I remember correctly, Libidinosus Potion amplifies the pleasure of touch without a concomitant increase in unpleasant sensations.”

“Precisely.” He’s much closer now. I imagine the breath of his response stirring my hair.

Looking quickly back to the cauldrons, I focus on the furthest.

It can’t be, can it?

Goddess, it is!

“And the third … the third is Strigo Conceptus Potion, the most effective Contraceptive Potion known!” I can feel myself beaming as I face him.

“You seem awfully enthusiastic about a Contraceptive Potion, Ms. Granger.” His voice is cold and distant once more. “Is there someone you’re hoping to test it with?”

“Yes!”

He glowers.

“I mean, no!”

Now his eyebrow quirks.

“I mean, yes, I need some of it, but no, it’s not for me.”

Sneer fading, he maintains the one highly arched eyebrow.

“I can’t tell you a name without the person’s permission, but it’s for someone I know, someone who really needs it. Would it be possible for me to have a vial? I’d be willing to help you with brewing. Or do you sell it?”

His smirk of amusement returns, but he offers no further answer.

“Of course, you sell it! That’s how you fund the resistance, isn’t it?”

“Yes, Ms. Granger. It turns out that there are a number of women who believe they have the right to control their fertility.” His expression grows somewhat smug. “And I am the black-market Potions maker for all of London.”

B. I. B. Potions – of course. He does all of that himself! Amazing.

He appears faintly pleased at my appreciative grin and reaches out to run a finger down my forearm and along the back of my hand.

Fire burns across my skin.

Circe!

Smirking fully, he explains in a low voice, “Decree 49 – no public touching that conveys affection.”

I swallow and say a little breathlessly, “But we aren’t in public.”

“Then I suppose I shall have to do it again.”

AN: Please review – it’ll save me from Thinking Pink!