1st Diary Entry

Disclaimer: These characters aren't mine, they are they belong to that Goddess Jo, if they were mine I'd be writing book 7 instead.

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Diary Entry AM.

I am about to teach my first Defence Against the Dark Arts lesson. I pretended to be smug as it was announced at the table; in truth I’d have preferred Potions. My fingers are just itching to feel the ingredients, to stir the cauldron clockwise and anti-clockwise. I doubt that I'll like Potter any more in this room than in the Potions Lab. As for the redhead... well, let's not go there! What will be unbearable is that this is actually a lesson Potter is GOOD in. This is going to be hard work! What will make it bearable is that this happens to be Miss Granger’s weakness. (Hmm, wonder why that is?)

Anyway, it’s going to be fun, I think. Of course the person that I would choose for experiments will be Potter, or the redhead! No, definitely Potter. It will be more satisfying. Besides, after fighting the Dark Lord in that graveyard, this should be a walk in the park for him. After fighting him bravely, even some of my… er… acquaintances were impressed. Worst luck! Oh well, Severus, you haven't let it bother you before so don't begin now. He's a child. It SHOULD be easy!

Diary Entry PM.

Potter was a sitting duck! I kept telling him what to do, but he would not do it! This is the boy that my acquaintances were impressed with? Oh well! As for Miss Granger....

Miss Granger... Why is she starting to be less fun to make fun of than before? She has grown up a lot I suppose, and being seventeen (or thereabouts) I suppose she does have the right to know a bit more than her peers. You know, I still can't believe I chose her hand in class. Normally I'd just pick someone else, but I didn't. Severus, you're losing your grip! Alright, so her mind works almost exactly the same way as HERS did! There is no point in thinking of that now. Why am I so irked? This is a teenage Mud... ahem, Muggle-born. I have done far more than she'll ever know! I don't know why, but a small part of me actually likes her! More than I care to admit. Gods, if I were twenty years younger… This worries me. I even called her talented and intelligent in front of Bellatrix Lestrange. Bitch Lestrange, more like!

Of course I recovered quick enough to insult her for reciting parrot-fashion from a book. Still, the whole class should have read that book by now and remembered that tiny detail. I walked past her during practical and I caught a whiff of her perfume… What kind of person am I turning into? Even if she were my age, she’d probably never give me a second glance!

Potter-bashing certainly seemed more enjoyable after that.

I must try and get inside Miss Granger's mind. Funny how she's managed to build up those walls. She’s a natural. I wish it were she in my office on her own all that time last year instead of Potter! I think I should just take a breather! Relax! She is JUST AN INTERFERING INSUFFERABLE KNOW-IT-ALL! There, that's better. You know Potions was a LOT easier. Damn that Dark Lord! I'll get him one of these days. You see if I don't!

Severus

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A/N This is my very first fanfic... I wanted to use first person narrative as that is the particular type of narration I like to read, and I think Severus mind is particularly interesting to explore.