Suspicion
Chapter 8 of 17
TheDeepEndI followed Nixon down the porch steps and watched as he leaned against a tree that stood in the middle of the yard; he glanced at me with his smoky eyes and held out another cigarette.
“Don’t worry, I won’t ask for any weird sexual favors in return.”
I took the cigarette awkwardly, and as he lit it, took a long drag. I coughed and pulled it away from my face. “That’s good to know, I guess. I don’t need people thinking any less of me than they already do.”
“What do they think of you?” He actually sounded concerned.
I hesitated before telling him what happened yesterday at school. I really didn’t know what had compelled me to tell a complete stranger about the troubles going on with me when he probably had a lot of his own.
“He sounds like a real bastard,” Nixon said when I finished speaking. “What are you going to do about it?”
“What can I do?” I muttered.
“Get even,” he suggested.
“I don’t know anything about him,” I confessed. The cigarette trembled between my fingers. “I don’t know what I did to him to make him hate me.”
“You rejected him,” Nixon said with a nod. “Guys can do a lot of fucked up things when that happens.”
“So can girls,” I pointed out.
“Right, but Evan seems to think that he can get any girl he wants. I think your saying no was a good thing, despite the circumstances.”
“You don’t know him, do you?” I put the cigarette to my lips.
“I’ve heard of him actually.”
I nearly sucked it down as he spoke. The smoke slid away from my lips. I took a breath and tried to calm my lungs.
“Are you okay?” Nixon asked. I shuddered as he placed a hand on my back. “Sorry if I surprised you.”
“I’m fine,” I whispered, looking at him. I didn’t mean to scare him like that. “How do you know him anyway? You said you didn’t go to Grandview. Plus, he just started there.”
“Is that right?” Nixon asked, scratching his chin lightly. He glanced up at the sun, then back at me. “Does everyone else think he’s new as well?”
I blinked at him. “What do you mean think?”
“It’s going to sound crazy,” he explained, staring at me with a hard gaze. “I just know that you can’t trust him.”
The remnants of my nearly forgotten dream slid across my brain, then, at his words. I couldn’t say anything that would make it sound sane. He would probably just think it was a coincidence anyway.
“Just tell me,” I breathed, my voice shaking, betraying me.
Nixon frowned as he walked away from me, and continued up the steps back to the door. He looked back at me. “Aren’t you coming?”
I followed automatically, my legs seeming to move on their own. A sudden sense of foreboding came over me as I went through the door. He stood by the couch, staring at the plate of fallen pancakes.
“I scared you,” he guessed without looking at me. “I’m sorry for that. I didn’t mean to.”
I went to say that I hadn’t minded, but shook my head. “What did you want to tell me?” I crossed my arms over my chest and stared at him.
He turned his eyes on me and grinned. “You would never believe me if I told you.” He started to play with the string on his black hoodie nervously. “I think you need to sit down for this though.”
I nodded and plopped on the couch. When he sat beside me, so close that our knees touched, my stomach fluttered. He looked like he was struggling with what he wanted to say. He took a breath, his words coming fast.
“Have you ever heard of a Sweeper?”
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Latest 25 Reviews for Delude
17 Reviews | 9.35/10 Average
Anonymous
Nice. This is really getting interesting...
WRITE FASTER! Tiny snippets do not satify me!
Throw us a couple-a-thousand words!!
Author's Response: I have a lot more chapters done, it's just waiting for them to be submitted here that makes the wait longer.
Give me your email and I'll send the rest to you.
Anonymous
Interesting...
Casey is really handling this pretty good, which is surprising. But there is that hint that she has been 'prepared' for her coming-out party.
If only I could have played with my Mom's mind whenever I came home late, or brought a female friend home!
I sense some training coming on also!
Good work!
Author's Response: She does overreact a lot though. I would if this situation was presented. I don't think I would believe anything I was being told.
I hope you like the next few chapters. I'm introducing a new character soon :)
Anonymous
Beautiful.
This is going very well, and I'm really looking forward to the next chapter!
Great work!
Author's Response: Thanks very much.
I'm trying to not make this story too obvious, but it's already unraveling that way.
Anonymous
Nice.
Not cheap, uninteresting drabble, but a very emotionally deep, and realistic meeting of the minds by Nixon and Casey.
I like where this is going, and I'm glad it isn't obvious.
Good work!
Anonymous
Another good chapter!
One of my favorite lines:
“Don’t worry, I won’t ask for any weird sexual favors in return.”
Wasn't expecting that from Nixon. Actually, this story is starting to feel familiar...
Have you ever read a manga called 'Tag'?
Really intersted in what a 'Sweeper' is. Are you preparing to go down a supernatural sort of road?
Author's Response: I am going to go down that road :) Like it wasn't obvious.
No, I haven't. I've actually never heard of it. What is it about?
EdgeOfDark's response: Tag is about a girl who becomes best friends with mysterious girl, who makes her a target for humiliation, rape, and possible death. All of this revolves around cell phones, and the victims doing whatever the text tells them to do... otherwise they get killed.
One of the best I've ever read!
Author's Response: That sounds cool, aside from the rape part. Kind of reminds me of One Missed Call, only they get voicemails, they heard their voice, then they died.
It's weird. It's an Asian movie so yeah, lol
EdgeOfDark's response: Hey, how many more chapters do you have to go?
Author's Response: I don't know. I'm still hoping to not get Writer's Block like I have with other stories. Why do you ask? :D
EdgeOfDark's response: Very curious!
My stories are all outlined, and I know how many chapters there are, and how long they usually going to be. Yours feels 1/3 of the way done!
Author's Response: I just have to figure out things. I mean, I have the main plot, but I need more of a character development for some.
EdgeOfDark's response: Ah! So most of your work is tied up in character development! You do that very well by the way.
Have you peeked at one of mine?
Author's Response: Not yet. I'm sorry.
The next chapter will be up soon, and then you'll be all caught up :)
EdgeOfDark's response: *waits impatiently!* 
Anonymous
Okay, this is getting good, and you know, I'm hooked. I have a bad feeling Casey is in for trouble with this Nixon kid.
What are snake-bites?
Author's Response: Nixon's the good guy :)
Snake-bites: Two piercings just under the bottom lip: one on the left side and one on the right. They can be studs or rings, or even a combination of both.
Anonymous
Uh oh. This is not looking good.
At least she knows what kind of person Jade really is. Sucks how she found out however.
Great chapter! Where's the rest? ^_^
Author's Response: I should just get your email and send you the rest, considering you're the only one whose reading this story, haha.
EdgeOfDark's response:
Boy do I know THAT feeling!!
My jaw really hit the floor when one of my fics turned up as a 'Featured Fic' on TPP.
Originals hardly get the time they deserve anywhere, especially good ones like this. You're a pretty competent writer too, and I hope you keep at it.
I think Original Authors should really support each other. That being said, I'd really like to know what you think about some of my work too!
Author's Response: Oh, I've never had the thrill of knowing my stories were featured for anything.
There's only a few sites I'm apart of, like Mibba, which is a relatively good site as far as reviews and things go. You should try it out.
Anonymous
Wow. Very well done. I could see this so clearly in my mind's eye. You built the scene masterfully, and I found myself wanting more of this tale!
Excellent work!
Author's Response: :DD Thank you so much.
Anonymous
Oh no! Not another Mindwar: Marooned on Earth type of story!
Awww, gee. I was really hoping for something new and different.
That said, it was still writen well, and easy to read... and I liked it.
Author's Response: Casey's not an alien, if that's what you're getting at, lol. That would be too predictable.
EdgeOfDark's response: So what we've got here is a special sub-strain of Humans who play puppeteer with the Normals?
Author's Response: Somewhat. I don't want to give things away.
Finish it! I really like this and want to know where you go with it.
I like how the ticking clock upset her. That has come up in a lot of my stories and it was the basis of my first song. Very good writing!
“What?” I hissed, as I read the answer. “What the hell are you talking about?” I said to him, my voice a little louder than I intended.
Everyone turned in their seats to look at me.
“Miss Sullivan—”
Fuck.
------
That was hilarious. Makes me think of things I have written!
Anonymous
Wow.
One wants to get close to these characters but...
Poor Casey really doesn't give much thought to her future or much else it seems. Is Nixon going to be just as irreverent and aimless?
Author's Response: Nixon's probably the most important character, other than Casey, in this story.
EdgeOfDark's response: LOL!
No! Not irrelevant! irreverent!
Is Nixon going to be just as irreverent and aimless as Casey?
Author's Response: Oh, wow, lol, sorry.
He might be. I don't really have much of him thought of yet.
Anonymous
Very good: I like how Casey is tentatively sharing her thoughts and feelings with the reader. That’s something you do very well with your characters.
It’s a shame that she and her mother don’t have a better relationship. What heartache. They could really help one another if they both weren’t so emotionally selfish.
Nice chapter!
Author's Response: Things are just going to go downhill from here anyway, and Casey knows her mom wouldn't believe anything that's going to happen, so she kind of has no one to depend on.
Thank you for the review. The next chapter should be up soon.
Anonymous
Nice!
I like where you're going with this, and it feels totally authentic. Very good job of describing the environment and characters. It's getting interesting!
Author's Response: Thanks very much :)
Anonymous
Hmmm...
That is one crude, intolerant ("Who likes to sit in a small ass seat with some fat kid?"), smelly, lazy slob of a kid.
He seems like one of those people with two definitive sides; not Good or Evil, just Evil and Indifferent.
Needs a serious foot in the ass.
I can hardly wait to see him get torn to bits... He is going to get torn to bits, right?
Author's Response: Well, since the main character is a girl (I guess I should have specified and the name throws people off), I'd hope she's not tore to bits. But someone else gets torn, and they deserve it.
EdgeOfDark's response: Ah... So someone is responsible for the tourturous birth of Evil Casey and Indifferent Casey. Going to be interested in seeing what kind of Monster that is.
Author's Response: Oh, she's not really that bad. Just dislikes most people and is a bitch in the morning. There's far worse than her in this story :)