Bellatrix

6. Bellatrix

"Are you certain?"

"Quite so," Snape said, pacing the Headmaster's office. "Bella took him, for whatever reason. I found her initials burned into the tree, Lupin is gone, and I don't have a choice anyway. I just came back to tell you that I'm going after him."

Dumbledore steepled his fingers on the desk, looking solemnly at his Potions master. "This might be a trap, Severus. You must be aware of that."

Snape didn't even bother to comment on that; he just snorted, restless and eager to go.

"How will you find them?" Dumbledore wanted to know, obviously too curious about unimportant details to let his Potions master off the hook so soon. "She didn't leave you a hint, did she?"

"She didn't need to," Snape snarled. "I can sense the werewolf when he is close. The binding makes me vulnerable, but in this case it might save his life. I will check all of Bella's hiding places. She is mentally ruined; she would never think to go somewhere she hadn't been before. Now would you..."

"Do you really want to find him?" The Headmaster's voice was suddenly colder than a moment before. "Wouldn't it serve you better if he died? I assume his death would break the binding and you would be free. I wonder if you haven't thought of this, too."

Snape stopped dead in his tracks and stared into that old face, wondering how anyone could consider this man as being mild and friendly. "Always thinking the worst of me, Albus, aren't you?" he stated, bitterness lacing his words. "Whatever I do, you will always consider me the traitor I once was."

"It is a logical assumption, Severus," Dumbledore replied sharply. "I know how much you dislike Remus, and I have seen your face the night you told me of the binding. You were shocked. If Bella kills him – or has done so already..."

Snape took a step towards the Headmaster, wondering if he could be fast enough to cast a curse at the old man. "He's alive," he stated as calmly as possible. "I'd know if he were dead. Because we are bound to each other, Albus, which means I can't live with Lupin being dead. He can't die without me following him within the hour. That's what a forced binding means. It's cruel and complicated and, no, it cannot be broken. I did consider killing him myself in order to end this situation for the both of us, simply because I see how horrible it is for him having to sit next to me three times a day. I didn't find the strength to do it, though. Letting him die is not an option, either. But even if it was – I am not such a lousy bastard to leave him in Bella's hands until she's finished playing with him."

Dumbledore, all of a sudden, was white as freshly fallen snow. "You haven't told me that. Does Remus know about the strictures of the binding?"

Snape pushed the door open, now unable to stay for as much as another minute. "No. I will tell him, though, when I have found him. I am sick of being accused of crimes I haven't committed."

"Severus..." the Headmaster began, but Snape had already stormed out of his office.

*****

In the end it wasn't that hard to find Bellatrix. There hadn't been many hiding places where the Dark Lord had felt safe. Snape went to all of them; when he Apparated to the Riddle House in Little Hangleton, he knew he was close.

Naturally, the Aurors had checked on the house and had put wards up in case a Death Eater sought shelter in the old mansion. But no escaped Death Eater would be daft enough to hide in this house, it being the place where the Dark Lord had risen some years ago. Snape was certain the Aurors' alarms hadn't gone off once since the end of the war.

There was a scent in the air, or a tone, or something similar to both – whatever it was, the result for Snape was immediate. The pounding in his ears ceased, he got his trembling hands under control, and his urge to rake his nails across his skin disappeared.

Lupin was close. Not in the main house – Snape didn't bother to even look at the rotten walls – but in the woods behind the garden, in the tiny shed which was hidden well enough that no Auror had found it. Occasionally the Dark Lord had imprisoned a Muggle in there as a special treat for Bella. She liked to torture people; Snape was certain that Lupin was in a poor condition by now.

There was no use in trying to get close without getting noticed – Bella was mad, but she wasn't stupid. She would have put up wards, and whatever her reasoning had been to leave her initials in the bark, she would allow no one to catch her by surprise. Therefore, Snape just followed the small path that led to the hut, his feet rustling the dry leaves on the ground. Ten minutes later he knocked at the door as if this was a social call, not by any means two enemies meeting.

Knock. It was a hollow sound, giving the false impression that the room beyond was empty and abandoned – Bella had set up her wards with a careful hand.

Knock. Snape's nostrils flared. His nose was by no means as good as the werewolf's, but he could smell blood in the atypically warm autumn air. And now, he heard a scream, sounding as if coming from far away. It had pierced the wards that protected the little hut, giving audible proof of the torment the man inside endured that very moment.

One last knock, strong enough to nearly break down the old, wooden door. Bella always liked to play, and she hated to be interrupted during torture, so Snape wasn't surprised that it took her a while to realise that someone demanded entry. She would have to put her tools down, she might have to clean her hands, wipe her hair out of her face, and catch her breath.

It was a miracle that the werewolf was still alive, but Snape was close enough to feel him, sense him now. He longed to get closer to him; if Bellatrix hadn't opened the door that very moment, Snape would have got his wand out, forcing his way in.

"Severus," Bellatrix Lestrange purred, leaning in the finally open door. Her wand was pointed directly at Snape's heart. "How absolutely terrific that you could be bothered to come around. How are you? How did it feel to go mad?"

Snape bowed his head ever so slightly and forced his hands to open. They were empty, of course. Had he drawn his wand, she would have killed him instantly. This was a game, and he played it because he knew she loved to play. "Bella. Pleased to see you are alive. I would have thought you'd followed the Dark Lord into death by now, but obviously, you decided to stay amongst the living for a bit longer." A quick glance over his shoulder, and he added, "May I come inside? One never knows when a Mudblood might walk past."

Bellatrix licked a drop of blood from the corner of her mouth. She wasn't a vampire, as Snape had found out long ago, but she loved blood nevertheless. Once, she had ripped out a woman's throat with her bare teeth. "Of course, Severus. Do come in and see what I have found in Hogwarts' forest." She stepped aside and allowed him to enter the hut, never getting too close to him and never lowering her wand.

Inside, it was bright enough to see every speck of dust, every empty bottle on the floor, all the cobwebs in the corners. Mice shit covered the planks, a dead rat lay half rotten under a broken chair, and the windows were blind with dirt. Glass shards crunched under the Potions master's boots when he stepped inside, and the door creaked conveniently when Bella closed it behind him.

In the middle of the room was a table; it was the only furniture that was not broken. Naturally not: it had to carry the half unconscious man that lay on top of it, motionless, bleeding silently.

Involuntarily, Snape took another step towards Bella's victim, confirming his identity.

Lupin. Of course it was Lupin. Nearly naked, wearing trousers but no shirt, he was covered in blood. Breathing, alive. In pain, and unable to move as his wrists and ankles were safely connected to the wooden table.

Lupin. As if he hadn't known the moment he had Apparated to the main house. As if his blood hadn't reacted to the man's presence.

"He looks lovely, doesn't he?" Bellatrix said behind him, tender cruelty lacing her words. "I caught him this morning – I hoped to find a student, but he was acceptable. Caught him right after his transformation. He was disorientated, didn't even have a wand. I Stupefied him." Stepping alongside Snape, never taking her eyes off him, she reached out and scratched one of her long, red fingernails across the werewolf's chest, leaving a thin, bleeding line. "So strong he is – he's hard to kill. I was having fun until you came!" Like a little girl, her lips quavered a bit at the last words.

Snape walked round the table. Lupin was now between him and the mad witch who was still scratching thin, red lines in the werewolf's skin as if he were a piece of parchment she could use for her art. There wasn't much white left; she had worked on him for hours already, leaving wounds, gashes, screams and tears in her wake.

In a way, it was art that she had made. Horrible, cruel, brutal art. She was an expert, and she knew it.

"I've nailed his hands to the table," she said idly. "Then I broke a few of his ribs. And his right leg. Or was it the left one? And all those wonderful tools in here... He screamed quite loudly. I like it when they scream."

Impossible not to touch him. Slowly, Snape placed his cold hand on the werewolf's naked chest. Although he could see and hear the werewolf breathe, although he saw his wide-open, fearful eyes, he needed to feel his heartbeat, too.

When his palm touched the werewolf's bloodied skin, when he felt the wolf's rapid, uneven heartbeat, when he heard Lupin's breath hitch with pain and panic, the Potions master became calm and cold as ice. "I assume the past hours have been rather unpleasant for him," Snape said, sounding bored. "Why did you keep him alive?"

Bellatrix grinned, looking madder than before. "You know I like to play with my toys, Severus. The main question is, why did you come here? I guess you found my mark on the tree, but still, why bother me? I thought you'd hide in that ugly school of yours forever, given the fact that you are a traitor and all." A finger snap and she had a thin, long piece of metal in her hand. The end glowed dark red.

At the sight of it, Snape's hand twitched inconspicuously. "You use surprisingly unusual tools for your game, Bella. No curses, no hexes? What's wrong with you?"

"I'm already finished with curses and hexes," she answered, and with a long, greedy sigh the witch pressed the glowing metal right underneath the werewolf's collarbone. Lupin jerked, trying to get off the table and away from the pain, but the nails impaling his hands and the broken bone in his leg would not allow him to do more than wriggle ineffectually.

And he screamed. Harsh, deep, with an intensity that made Snape's hair stand up at the base of his neck. Clenching his teeth, the Potions master managed – with a lot of effort – not to snatch the bar out of Bella's hand and smash her head in with it. Instead, he increased the pressure on Lupin's chest, holding him down, wordlessly trying to calm him, to take some of the pain from him.

Seconds passed, or maybe an eternity. When the red, hot glow had ceased to a useless grey, Bellatrix tossed the bar away into a corner and then bent low, inspecting the damage she had inflicted. Her wand was still held in her right hand, and not for a single moment did her concentration break. Had Snape tried to draw his own wand, he he would have been dead before his fingers had touched it.

Lupin's muscles were hard as stone, his joints strained to breaking point as he struggled to get himself under control. His screams died down to a weak, helpless whimper, and his whole body shook in aftershock of the torture.

"Sweetie, I'm not done with you yet," Bella assured him and then, to Snape, said, "So, why exactly are you here?"

With a well-placed, long-practised, very disgusted-looking sneer, Snape wiped his bloody hand on his trousers, then crossed his arms over his chest simply because he feared that otherwise he'd do something stupid. "Actually, I came to ask you a question, my dear. I wondered why you hexed me with Desipentia instead of killing me. The damn curse has caused me a great deal of trouble, but I would have assumed you'd rather see me dead than mad."

When Bellatrix stepped away from the table, Snape closed his eyes for the briefest moment. The presence of Lupin was like a constant pull, a permanent reminder that he ought to get the werewolf out of here as quickly as possible. Simultaneously, he had to pretend that Lupin didn't mean anything to him, or Bella would kill him instantly. It was harder than he would have thought; it was equally shocking to confess that he cared for Lupin and that his caring appeared to have nothing to do with the binding.

"I love garden sheds," the witch murmured as she summoned a rusty pair of scissors. "So many nice ideas one can get by simply looking around. I will snip and snap a bit now, Severus. Fingers, toes, ears and nose and maybe, later, his cock. You might like to get farther away from the beast, or you will get covered in his blood."

"Desipentia, Bellatrix?" Snape reminded her mildly and didn't move an inch.

Bella was clearly annoyed by his constant questions as well as by his presence. She rammed the scissors into the table, only half an inch from Lupin's neck. The werewolf barred his teeth; the witch just spat at him. "I took pity on you, Severus," she snapped, dipping her fingertip in a wound on Lupin's chest and licking off the drop of blood. "You always looked so stiff, so unhappy, so unshagged. I thought I should give you the opportunity for one last fuck before someone kills you. Besides, Desipentia is such a wonderful curse. I know what I am talking about. Madness claims you if the curse isn't broken. I thought your colleagues would either kill you or you'd go mad and I'd have a companion. A mad Potions master at my side – lovely prospect, don't you think?"

Snape could hardly tear his eyes off the scissors' blades, so dangerously close to the pulsating vein in Lupin's throat. "Logical reasoning," he finally said. "You didn't consider the possibility of someone simply breaking the curse?"

Bella threw her head back and laughed. Very nearly, Snape would have used the opportunity to draw his wand, but before he could do so, she stabbed her own weapon at him. "Break the curse? Fuck you back into sanity? No, I haven't considered that, Severus. You are ugly. You are nasty. You are the worst person I have met in my life, and that says a lot. I would have bet anything that no one would sink low enough to get near you, let alone shag you!" Shuddering, she pulled a face, obviously unable to get a certain image out of her mind.

Casually, as if he were at a party and not in a tiny shed, playing for Lupin's life, Snape leaned against the wall. "You were wrong, though, Bella. Obviously someone was nice enough to do it."

"Who?"

Raising an eyebrow, Snape just nodded to the half-dead man on the table. He assumed that Lupin was listening; at least, the werewolf's eyes were wide open and fixed on the Potions master's face.

Bella followed his gaze. Her eyes widened, and she coughed in shock. "What! He? That animal... He..."

"'Fucked me back into sanity', as you so nicely phrased it. Yes. Don't ask me why, because he despises me as much as anyone else does, but he did. Which is the reason why I am here and not at St. Mungo's or the graveyard."

Bellatrix narrowed her eyes, clearly trying to figure out if Snape was making fun of her. Her wand steadily pointed at Snape's chest; then she swung it round towards Lupin in a wide arch and hissed, "Legilimens!"

The werewolf tried to fight her. Amazingly, he had enough life energy left in him to move his lips, trying to block the spell even without a wand. Useless, of course, but Snape wondered what Lupin was trying so hard to hide and stepped closer to the table again. He couldn't hex Bella – she would have seen any hostile movement – so he took the opportunity to learn what he could.

"Let me see your memories, little wolf," Bellatrix purred. "Let me see what happened that night, let me... Ah! There you are, Severus. Gods, you look bad! All bloody and naked and... huh! I didn't know you are that well hung! I would have had a more direct look long ago, despite that greasy hair of yours!"

Bellatrix crouched above the werewolf like a vampire above a victim. Her wand was drilled in Lupin's chest, her other hand nearly strangled him. "Desire," she whispered, reporting to both men what she saw, what she felt in the werewolf's memories. "A lust potion, he drinks a lust potion because otherwise he wouldn't be able to fuck you, love."

"No surprise there," Snape said and was glad that apparently, Bellatrix hadn't heard the pained subnote in his voice.

"He is scared of you... pities you... He binds you and gags you – I like that, dear Severus! – and drags you into the bedroom... He wants you so badly. He looks forward to... What? He looks forward to being with you, to touching you, and hey! He loves shagging you!" Briefly, she looked up at Snape, a confused frown on her face. "I can't believe it! He mounts you and hates himself for raping you but at the same time he wishes it would never end, it..." Bella broke off. Staring at Snape, still strangling Lupin half to death and ignoring the tears that ran down the werewolf's face, she continued, "He craves your touch, Severus. I bet you didn't know that. He wants you. You! The greasy git, the traitorous bastard! He broke the curse because he fucking loves you!"

"Highly unlikely, Bella," Snape answered coolly. "The pain has addled his memory. You managed to drive him insane in just a few hours. Well done, dear."

Bellatrix frowned and confirmed what she had seen. "No. He's dying, but he's clear. He was horrified when he realised that he had enjoyed what he'd done, he considers it rape, and he ran from your dungeons – Oh, how sweet, you cried? Wish I had been there – and went into his rooms. Where he... Yay! He had a wank in the shower, thinking of you! Needed to get the lust potion out of his system. He spilled with your image in front of his eyes and ever since, he can neither look at you nor at himself in the mirror. Sitting next to you at meals is worse torture than anything I have done to him so far. He knows you hate him for what he has done and..."

Her head jerked up once more. "Why does he sit next to you at meals?" she inquired. "He would so much like to spare you his company, but he has to be there. Why?"

Snape unfolded his arms. This had to end soon or they both would die at the mad witch's hand. "Didn't I tell you? I am bound to him. A forced binding, that is. Apparently, this happens when Desipentia is combined with virginity. I reacted more strongly to the curse than usual. An hour after it had hit me I was already nearly too far gone for Lupin to reverse it. Pity I hadn't known this tricky little detail. Took me nearly a week to figure it out. Brought me to my knees in the meantime."

Bella's wand, for the first time since Snape had entered the shed, quavered. "Bound to a werewolf?" she whispered in disbelief. She sounded more sane than ever before. "Virginity? But that's impossible. I knew at least one virgin who..."

Snape interrupted her. "Female virgins, Bella, and under thirty-five years of age. It seems as if age and gender adds to the basic cruelty of Desipentia. That bit of information I found in a book about love spells, by the way. Just in case you are interested."

Bellatrix giggled. Given her twisted face, her crazy eyes, and the blood on her hands, it was a most disturbing sound. "You truly were a virgin, Severus?"

"Until Lupin relieved me of the burden," Snape said, amusement lacing his words. "I must admit, I would have thought a first time to be a more pleasurable event. I certainly didn't expect to wish I were dead instead."

The wand dropped lower as Bellatrix's eyes grew bigger. Her gaze shot from Lupin to Snape and back. "That means, if I had killed him, you would have died, too! That means, he, a filthy animal, deflowered the feared Potions master." She began to tremble with suppressed laughter.

"Actually, it just means I should have made a bigger effort to get laid before you cursed me," Snape said casually, and Bella laughed until tears ran down her cheeks. Shrieks of laughter, loud and hysterical in their joy: her wand lost focus as well as her eyes. She even had to steady herself, needed to put both her hands onto the table Lupin was nailed to. Her wand was pressed flat against the rough wood, and she dropped her head, shaking with laughter.

Snape killed her without hesitation. His Avada Kedavra hit her squarely in the forehead, and she crumpled on the dirty floor, her laughter frozen on her crazy face.

Silently, the Potions master knelt down next to her, plucked her wand out of limp fingers and broke it in half. Then he broke her neck – from experience he knew that sometimes it was better to make sure than to believe in the strength of spells. "Stupid bitch. I tell you an embarrassing, meaningless little secret, and you forget whom you are dealing with. I should have killed you years ago, Bella. Someone, anyone, should have killed you the moment you went mad." Thoughtfully, he looked at her, took in her twisted face, the blood on her hands and on her clothes, her damaged teeth and her hair, covered in cobwebs. Apparently she had been hiding in the tool shed for a while, given her sorry state. "Doesn't matter anymore," Snape muttered and got up. "Time to get out of here."

It wasn't as easy as he had thought to step back to the table. It was not easy at all seeing the beaten, bleeding body of the werewolf and his wide, frightened eyes. Although the Potions master had seen many deaths, many corpses, and far too many tortures, this here was the worst of all. I care for him. The thought came unbidden and sent goosebumps down his spine. And if I don't hurry, he will die. I cannot let that happen.

Remus tried to turn his head when he saw Snape, tried to look around him, fear painted in his face. "She's dead, Lupin," Snape said and flicked his wand. A clean, wet cloth appeared in his hand; swiftly, he added a strong sedative to the fabric "I killed her. Her corpse is over there on the floor; she can't harm you anymore." Nearly gently, he wiped the hair out of the werewolf's face, then pressed the cloth to the dry lips. With satisfaction he felt Lupin sucking moisture from the scrap of fabric to wet his throat. Snape had assumed correctly that the werewolf was horribly thirsty after hours of screaming. As the water was laced with the sedative, Lupin would loose consciousness soon.

Not yet, though. "Why?" Remus croaked.

Snape raised an eyebrow and cut through the thin wire round the werewolf's throat that was holding him down. "Why did I kill her? Because otherwise she would have killed us. I have no desire to die. I know you are not in the best condition, but that much should be obvious to you."

"Why..." Lupin coughed once, "are you here? Should have let... let me die."

Snape just placed his hand on the werewolf's chest once more, strangely comforted by touching the cold skin. Trying to convince himself that the gesture was nothing but an attempt to calm the injured man, he waited until the sedative would kick in. Until then, he might as well answer questions. "I am here because I have no other choice but to get you back in one piece, wolf. Besides, she could keep her victims alive for more than a week. You might be of a different opinion, but I am not that cruel. I would have tried to save anyone from her torturing skills. Be glad I found you before she'd found the scissors."

Remus closed his eyes for a brief moment as if to gather some strength. "True? Is it... true that... you die if I die?"

Snape just nodded.

"And you were... untouched?"

Snape sighed deeply. "Yes," he said simply.

"Sorry... so sorry." The werewolf's words were barely audible. Tears mingled with the blood on his cheeks. "If only she could have killed me... Would have been a nice... nice and clean... way out. For both of us."

"Don't talk nonsense," Snape snapped. "You don't want to die. I don't want you to die. I'll take you back to Hogwarts and Poppy..."

"Sh... shouldn't have told... she shouldn't have told you about my... memories," Remus rasped. "'bout my weakness, my lack... of self-... self-control." The werewolf's breath came in shallow gasps. "You were so warm; so much in need. Being with you was... what I wanted for so long. Apologise... didn't want to rape... hurt... you."

"Shut up, Lupin." Snape wanted the werewolf to spare his strength, and most of all, he didn't want to hear further confessions. But he couldn't help listening.

Remus's eyes widened as he fought the upcoming sleep that was about to embrace him. "You are right to loathe me. I'm an animal... monster... I'm... disgusting. Sorry... so sorry for loving you," he breathed just before his eyes dropped closed for good. His head sunk aside and his muscles went limp.

Snape stared at the unconscious man, not believing what he just had heard. For months he had believed Lupin's disgust had been aimed at him, only to find out under such crucial circumstances how wrong he had been.

Anyway. This was not the time to think about it. Snape blinked, took a pair of pliers, and pulled out the nails that held the werewolf's hands in place. Blood welled over his hands, blood was on his clothes and even in his face. He didn't care. Casting some basic healing spells, he managed to at least slow the bleeding, if not stop it completely. It would have to do until the werewolf was in Poppy's professional hands. The broken bones – leg and ribs – he steadied with a Stasis Charm. Then he slipped his arms underneath the werewolf and lifted him up as easily as if he were a bundle of rags, unaware of the fact that a few months ago, it had been the other way round.

Outside, the moon was just about to rise. Snape kicked the door open and stepped into the cold night air. One last glance backwards, a muttered word, and the shed began to burn. The flames licked hungrily at the dry wood, incinerating both the shed and the dead witch inside. "To hell with you, Bella," Snape said and Disapparated with his burden.