Chapter 5: Pain and Heartache

The End

Chapter 5: Pain and Heartache

---

Harry walked downstairs to the common room three weeks later. There was a crowd around the bulletin board. Murmuring and occasional gasps were heard. Harry walked over to the group of teenagers and pushed his way through. He looked at the board. The new Quidditch list had been put up. Harry, of course, was still Seeker, even after he missed two years of playing on account of Dolores Umbridge and training.

"Harry, guess who made captain!" Ginny yelled. She was now a Chaser. Harry looked at her with sleep written all over his face.

"Who, Gin?" he asked. Ginny smiled and moved to the side. Harry looked at the board squinting even though he had his glasses on. His eyes widened when he saw the name.

"Ron? This is great! He's the best strategic person we have. Has he seen this yet?" Harry asked, honestly happy for his best friend. Harry'd learned in first year that Ron always desired to be Quidditch captain. He'd also wanted to be Head Boy, but that spot was currently being filled by the only person willing to abuse that power. So now, Ron was the Keeper and the captain of the House team. Aurora had also tried out and was now a Chaser for Gryffindor.

"Nope. He came downstairs and everything. But, I take it he was too sleepy to notice the board. When I asked where he was going, he mumbled something about a long shower. You know how unobservant Ron is when he wakes up," Ginny said. Harry nodded knowingly. He also knew how lethal and dangerous Ron was when he was woken up. "Hermione!" Ginny yelled, looking over Harry's shoulder. Harry turned around.

Hermione was gliding down the stairs, looking very sick and very tired. She looked over at her friends and smiled weakly. She walked over to them. Harry looked her up and down. Her face almost looked green.

"Good morning, Hermione," Harry said timidly. Hermione's weird smile diminished.

"What's so fucking good about it? What's all this racket for?" she asked, nodding in the direction of the group of students.

"They posted the new team for Quidditch. Harry and I are back on it. So is Ron. Ron's also the new captain. Isn't that great, Hermione?" Ginny asked gleefully. Hermione tried to fake another smile. She was happy for Ron, but her face just wouldn't let her smile for some reason. Ginny's grin disappeared. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Look. Here's Ron now," Hermione said, trying to shift the attention off of her. Ginny looked at her again, then both she and Harry turned to Ron. He was stepping through the portrait hole. He glanced at the crowd then looked at Ginny and Ron. Hermione seemed to be trying to back away from them.

"Hey, you guys. What's going on?" Ron said, gesturing towards the students. Harry and Ginny looked at each other and smiled.

"They posted the Quidditch tryouts results," Ginny said. Ron nodded.

"Am I still Keeper?" Ron asked. Harry nodded.

"There's also something else. Ron, I'm sorry to tell you this, but..." Harry began. Ron faced him, looking a little worried.

"What?" he asked frantically. Harry smiled widely.

"YOU'VE MADE QUIDDITCH CAPTAIN!" he yelled at the top of his lungs. Ron seemed to just pause and stop breathing for a moment and stare at Ginny and Harry, who were laughing maniacally. He was just staring at them. Ginny stopped laughing hysterically and looked at her brother.

"Ron, are you okay?" she asked. Ron nodded numbly. Then he smiled.

"This is bloody awesome! I have to start making up new strategies and..." Ron went on and on. Then he noticed Hermione standing there, looking sullen and worn. "Hey, Hermione. How's it going? Are you feeling all right? You don't look so good," Ron said, looking at her with concern in his eyes. Hermione looked up at him. She'd been avoiding him like the plague, but it was still understood that they hadn't broken up. Ginny and Harry decided this was the best time to go to breakfast.

"Well, why don't we all go to breakfast?" Ginny said gleefully. Harry and Ron nodded.

"Yeah. We should celebrate this joyous occasion. Hermione, are you up to it?" Harry asked. Hermione shook her head, and everyone's smile faded.

"You all go on ahead. I have to study. I'll meet you down there when I'm done," she said, turning to go back upstairs. When she was gone, Ron squeezed his hands into fists so tight, it looked as if he was going to draw blood. Harry walked up next to him.

"Let's go, mate."

"Yeah." Ron took one last look at the stairs where Hermione had disappeared then followed Harry and his sister out.

---

At breakfast in the Great Hall, Harry watched Ron pick sullenly at his food.

"I just don't bloody get it!" he said, pushing his plate away finally. Harry and Ginny looked up from their conversation.

"Get what?" Harry asked. Ron looked in his direction as Aurora, Neve, Tommy, and Draco sat down. "Hey, you guys," Harry mumbled. They all nodded.

"Congratulations, Ron. I heard you made Quidditch captain. Draco did, too," Aurora said, smiling. Then she noticed the look on Ron's face as he mumbled a thanks. "What's wrong?" she asked, looking concerned.

"It's Hermione. She's so fucking distant. All she does is study, study, study. Has she forgotten that I exist or something? Nowadays, I'm lucky if I even make eye contact with her. What the bloody hell is wrong with her?" Ron asked, his face turning red. Ginny looked at Aurora. Aurora nodded.

"Ron, I think you ought t..." Ginny didn't get to finish because Hermione had just graced them with her presence.

"Hello, all. Sorry, I can't really talk. I just came by to get a muffin. Neve, I like your hair that color," she said happily. Ginny, Harry, and Ron all looked dumbfounded. This was a totally different person than the one they left upstairs. Hermione grabbed a blueberry muffin, and was off to the library. Everyone sat in silence until Ginny broke it.

"Is it just me, or did that strike everyone as a bit odd?" she asked, looking around the table. They all nodded except Draco.

"Not me, Weasley. Granger's been acting weird like that for a good minute now," he said, stuffing a biscuit into his mouth. Aurora nudged him, and he nearly choked on it. Ron frowned.

"I'm going to have a few choice words with Miss Granger," he said, standing abruptly. For Ron, this was quite an intimidating move, seeing as he was well over six feet.

"Ron, wait. I think there's somethi..." Ginny was cut off.

"No, Ginny. Don't try to save her. The bitch has had this coming for two months now. I'm sick of being treated like I'm the scum of the fucking universe. I'll see you all later." Ron marched off like a man on a mission. Ginny sighed.

"Can't say I didn't try," she said quietly. Harry nodded.

"This is not good, Ginny. Who knows what Ron might do? He's not exactly the most self-restrained person when he's angry," Neve said. Ginny nodded. "But, they have to deal with it sooner or later. It'll become painfully obvious soon." Everyone nodded.

---

In the library, Hermione was sitting at a table, immersed in a book on Astronomy. Ron burst through the door and looked around. There were only about a handful of students in there. Rina Tremaine was one of them. Ron went over to her.

"Hi, Ron. I heard you made Qui..." She was cut off by Ron slamming his hand on the table. Rina jumped a little. "Are we a wee bit frustrated, Ron?" she asked sarcastically. Ron nodded.

"Thanks for the congrats. But, I'm not here for that. Have you seen Hermione?" he asked. Rina nodded.

"She's on the other side, sitting at a table. I saw her come in a little while ago. You know Hermione. She's always studying. Who knows what she's studying for now," Rina said, shrugging. She returned to her book.

"Yeah, I know. That's the fucking problem. Thanks, Rina." Ron walked off. He went to the other side of the large library. Sure enough, Hermione was looking in a book, oblivious to the world around her. Ron furrowed his eyebrows and walked up to her. He grabbed her by the wrist. Hermione looked up, shocked.

"Ron, what are you..." She stopped as Ron pulled her to her feet. He dragged her to an aisle between the bookcases. Hermione struggled in his grip. Ron came to a solitary spot and turned. "Ron, let go of me!" Hermione whispered urgently. Ron finally released her. Hermione looked at her wrist. It was red where Ron had grabbed her. "What the bloody hell is wrong with you?" she asked, sounding a little hurt and rubbing her wrist in pain. Ron crossed his arms.

"No, Hermione. The question is what's wrong with YOU. Why all of a sudden do you avoid me? Why do you always snap at me for no justifiable reason? Why the hell are you always studying? You weren't even this bad in first year. That's when all you did was read and study. This is ten times worse! What the hell is wrong with you?" Ron didn't bother whispering. Hermione just stared at him.

"You don't know anything," she whispered. Ron threw his hands up in the air.

"I know that since you came to the Burrow you've been acting like a total bitch. Everything I say is wrong. You're treating me, and everyone else for that matter, like shit. No one else is man enough to step to you. Me, personally, I'm fed up with it. So either you tell or stop making everyone feel like crap," Ron said. Hermione frowned. This time Ron had overstepped his boundary.

"Hold up. Did you just call me a bitch?" she asked. Ron sighed.

"I said all of that, and all you heard was 'bitch?' Yes, I called you a bitch," he said defiantly. Hermione's eyes flashed a warning, but Ron took no heed of it.

"You have some nerve, Ronald Weasley! How dare you call me bitch! You have no idea what's going on with me!" she yelled. Ron sighed. He looked into Hermione's eyes and took a step forward.

"I would if you would just tell me. Stop being so secretive about everything," he said almost softly, but his voice still signaled anger. Hermione turned her gaze away from him.

"You wouldn't understand. You'd just blow up," she said, her voice shaking. Ron's ears began turning red. He grabbed Hermione by her shoulders and pulled her closer to him.

"Who are you to tell me how I'M going to act?! I'm the only person who knows how I'm going to act! I hate it when everyone assumes that I'll act like a raging animal when I find out something! Yes, I know I have a bad temper! But, that's not how I act all the time! Damnit, Hermione! Just tell me whatever the fuck it is!" Ron was yelling now. Hermione looked like she was on the verge of crying.

"I... can't. I'm sorry. I just can't tell you," she said sadly. Ron released her. He took a step back.

"Fine. If you can't tell me, then why am I with you? You apparently don't feel the need to let me in on how you're feeling. I do care a lot about you, Hermione. Everyone else cares a lot about you. We all love you. Why do you treat us this way? Nevermind. Fuck it. If you don't care enough, I won't bother to care either. Goodbye, Hermione," Ron said in a tone Hermione'd never heard him use before. He pushed past her. Hermione turned around and watched him go. She wiped a tear from her face.

"I'm pregnant, Ron," she whispered as she stared at his back.

---

That night, Ginny sat at the table in the common room with Hermione. Hermione was writing furiously on her parchment. It was her History of Magic essay. Ginny was studying for her Potions test. Ginny looked at the clock on the wall. It was past one in the morning. Ginny yawned as Aurora came downstairs.

"Hermione, give it a rest, will you? It is entirely too late. You can finish that essay tomorrow," Aurora said. Hermione shook her head. Aurora looked at Ginny with pleading eyes. Ginny sighed and snatched the quill out of Hermione's hand. Hermione looked up.

"Give that back!" she yelled. Ginny shook her head.

"Hermione, it's one in the morning. Your paper is due on Tuesday. It's Saturday. Wait, no, it's actually Sunday now. Go... to... bed," Ginny said, snapping Hermione's quill in two. If Hermione was a telepath, Ginny would be dead by now. Ginny stared at Hermione with indifference. Hermione realized she wasn't going to win this fight.

"Fine. I'll go. But, first, I want to take a shower. I really need it to calm down. I've had a really tough day," Hermione said, thinking of the row she'd had with Ron. Ginny and Aurora nodded.

"Ok, Hermione. I WILL be waiting for you to return. Do not let me have to come after you," Aurora said. Hermione nodded and headed for the prefects' bathroom.

---

In the bathroom, Hermione turned on all the stalls. She loved it when it sounded like it was raining. It gave her a feeling of pure serenity. She went in a stall and just stood under the water as it fell on her.

"Oh, Ron," she whispered. She was sure he hated her. "And it's all my fau... Aaaaaaaaah!" Hermione touched her lower abdomen. A sharp pain had just rushed through her. She felt almost woozy from it. Standing up straight, she felt another shock. This time, it lingered for a long moment. Hermione doubled over, breathing hard. She squeezed her eyes shut.

What's going on? she thought. Hermione opened her eyes and looked at the tiles. The water was being mixed with something red. Hermione's eyes widened. It's coming from me. I'm bleeding. But why? she thought. Panicking, she took a step back and tripped over the divider between the shower and the undressing area. She grabbed the shower curtain in order to hold her balance. Instead, she managed to somehow become entangled in it. Hermione hit her head against the wall, knocking herself into unconsciousness. Blood trickled from her head.

---

Aurora looked at the clock. It was 1:30. It doesn't take thirty minutes to take a shower. Unless, of course, you were Draco Malfoy. Sighing, Aurora got out of her bed and went to the sixth-year dorms. She walked over to Ginny's bed and shook her. Ginny turned over.

"What is it, Aurora? This had better be really good or you will be really sorry," she asked, sounding extremely irritated.

"Hermione has not come back yet. Come with me to Harry's room," Aurora said, literally pulling Ginny out of bed. They snuck into Harry and Ron's room. Ron sounded like a locomotive. Aurora took Ron, and Ginny took Harry. Harry sat up rather quickly. He held his wand to Ginny's throat. He blinked twice as Ginny came into focus. He reached for his glasses.

"Gin? What is it?" he asked, putting them on. Ron was just realizing that Aurora was not a giant spider.

"We need to use your map, Harry," Ginny said. Harry sighed and got out of his bed. He rummaged around in his trunk for a moment, then pulled out the old piece of parchment. He touched it with his wand.

"I solemnly swear that I am up to no good," he said. The map appeared. He looked up at Ginny. "Now, who are we looking for?" Harry asked.

"Hermione," Aurora and Ginny answered together. Harry looked at Ron, who shrugged. Harry opened the map up.

"There she is. She's in the girls' prefect bathroom. The only problem is..." Harry's voice trailed off. He looked up at the rest of them. "...her name is fading. That means something's wrong. Mischief managed," Harry said. They were off in ten seconds flat. When they reached the portrait that was the entrance, they all just stood there.

"Does anyone know the bloody password?" Ron asked frantically. Ginny thought for a moment.

"Chocolate strawberry frogs," she said. The door swung to the side, letting them in. They all looked at her. "What? Hermione told me one day. I wanted to use the shower alone. Big deal," she said, heading inside.

Inside, the room was filled with steam. All the showers were still running. They quartet looked around, trying to find Hermione. It was nearly suffocating standing in the steam-filled room. Ron looked around. He saw a trail of red liquid coming from one of the stalls. Walking towards it, he saw a hand, then an arm, and finally a body.

Hermione was lying in her own blood. A pool of it was surrounding her, and the water was mixing with it. She was wrapped in what looked like a translucent shower curtain. Ron kneeled down to her. Ginny and Harry came up behind him. Ginny gasped.

"Is she..." She couldn't bring herself to say the words. Ron shook his head, picking her up.

"No, she's not. She's just unconscious. She has a concussion, I bet. It looks like she fell. All of this blood couldn't have come from her head, though. Come on," Ron said quietly. He sounded unnaturally calm.

---

When they reached the hospital wing, no one was there. They went and beat on Madam Pomfrey's door. She opened it, looking like she was ready to give whomever it was a good tongue-lashing.

"What the... Sweet mother of Merlin! What happened to this child?" she asked, examining Hermione in Ron's arms.

"We don't know. We found her like this. What's wrong with her, Madam Pomfrey?" Harry asked. Madam Pomfrey led them to a private room.

"Lay her on the bed," she said. Ron did as he was told. "Go and get me Professor Douglas, one of you. It looks like she sustained a head injury. It's cut just a little bit, but why is she covered in so much blood?" Madam Pomfrey asked as Aurora ran off to find Aislin. Ron and Harry shrugged. Madam Pomfrey looked at Ginny, who looked like she knew something. She nodded at Madam Pomfrey.

"Boys, if you would be so kind as to wait outside," Madam Pomfrey said. Ron and Harry looked a little hesitant, but complied just as Aurora and Aislin came into the room.

"What's wrong, Poppy?" they heard Aislin ask as the door was shut behind them. Ron sighed and sat down in the seat. He looked like hell. Harry sat down next to him.

"I wonder what's wrong with her," he wondered aloud. Harry sighed. He had a pretty good idea of what happened to Hermione, but he wasn't sure if he was the one to tell Ron. After about fifteen minutes, Ginny and Aurora emerged from the room. Harry and Ron stood. The two girls looked very sullen and solemn.

"How is she?" Ron asked, looking hopeful. Ginny looked at Aurora and shook her head. Aurora nodded.

"Ron, I think you should sit down for this," Aurora said quietly. Ron looked at her with a quizzical expression on his face.

"Why do I need to sit?" he asked. " She's not..." he began. Aurora immediately shook her head.

"Oh, heaven's no, Ron. Hermione will be fine...physically. But, there is something you need to know before I tell you exactly what happened," Aurora said slowly. Ron was still looking at her skeptically. He didn't move an inch.

"No. I think I'll stand. Just tell me what it is, Aurora. I'm tired of being left in the dark," Ron said. Aurora sighed and looked down.

"Well, you know how Hermione's been acting rather strangely the past couple weeks, right?" she asked. Ron nodded.

"Yeah. What does this have to do..."

"I'm getting to it. The reason we all were pretty much immune to her outbursts of rage and her mean comments was because we knew what was wrong with her. Hermione was pregnant," Aurora said. The last word seemed to ring in the air very loudly. Ron just stood there, unblinking. His eyes seemed out of focus. Ginny and Harry looked at each other.

"Ron?" Harry asked, taking a step forward. Ron shook his head. His eyes seemed to focus back on Aurora.

"What do you mean 'was?'" he asked. Aurora took a step back, suddenly afraid for her safety.

"Exactly what I said. It means that Hermione WAS pregnant. It means that she is not anymore; Hermione had a miscarriage," Aurora said. Ron still just stared at her. There was almost no readable emotion on his face.

"What causes one of those?" Ron whispered.

"There are many causes of one, Ron. Aislin said that the most likely one was that Hermione was pushing herself too hard with her schoolwork. She was putting too much strain on her body and mind. Stress could've been a strong factor," Aurora explained. Ron nodded. Then he backed up into the bench. He sat down hard in it. Harry sat down next to him.

"It's all my fault," Ron said. Harry shook his head.

"No, it's not, Ron. Don't blame yourself. No one knows why these types of things happen. They can't be predicted," Harry said. Ron shook his head.

"I made her sad. I stressed her out." Ron put his head in his hands. Seeing Ron do this tore at Ginny's heart. She kneeled in front of him.

"Ron, it really isn't your fault. There could've been a number of reasons why..."

"Why didn't you all tell me? Why didn't she tell me?" Ron asked, looking up. Ginny looked at Harry, who looked at Aurora. Aurora shrugged.

"We didn't think you could handle it. Hermione made us promise not to tell you. Plus, you know how you get when you hear news you don't like," Ginny said. Ron stood up, suddenly raging mad like a bull. It made Ginny jump back. That was obviously the WRONG thing to say. Harry sighed, as he knew exactly what was coming.

"What makes you think that I'm some fucking nuclear warhead that's set to blow at any moment?! It's not your choice to decide what and what not to tell me! It is shit like this that makes me blow up; when you keep stuff from me! Some friends you all turned out to be." Ron turned to go. Harry jumped up and touched him on his shoulder.

"Ron..." Harry began. Ron, in his anger, turned and punched Harry dead in his jaw. Harry fell back into Ginny. Ron looked at him with a satisfied, yet sad, look on his face. Then he turned and ran off.

"Harry, are you okay?" Ginny asked. Harry nodded, moving his jaw around.

"I suppose I had that coming. We shouldn't have kept it from him. He's right. It wasn't our decision," Harry said, standing up.

"It was not our decision to keep it from him in the first place. Hermione told us not to tell," Aurora said.

"We owed it to him to tell him. After all, Aurora, he was the father," Harry said. Aurora had nothing else to say to that. That's when Aislin came out of the private room.

"How is she?" Ginny asked quickly. Aislin looked up.

"She'll live. But, she's going to need a lot of time to recover. I trust that you will not blabbing about this to the rest of the school. I'm sure whoever knew she was pregnant to begin with will figure it out eventually. Tell only whom you must. I don't want her to suffer any shame. I don't think she could take it. We'll send her to St. Mungo's for further evaluation and treatment. Where's Ron?" Aislin asked.

"Well, Ron was the only one of us who didn't know. He just found out, and he was rather sad at first. Then, he sort of blew up at the fact that everyone kept it from him," Harry said. Aislin crossed her arms as she looked at Harry's purple eye.

"I'm not surprised at all that he reacted the way he did. One of you, if not Hermione herself, should've told him. Regardless of what Hermione said. He had a right to know. He shouldn't've had to find out like this. Anyway, get to bed. It's late," Aislin said. The three nodded and headed back to Gryffindor tower.

---

Ron sat in Astronomy tower, looking up at the stars. An empty bottle of firewhisky rolled around next to him in the wind. He closed his eyes and pictured how happy he and Hermione used to be.

"Mione... Why?" he whispered before he passed out from the whiskey.