His Heart's Desire
cmwinters6 Reviews | 6 Ratings, 0 Likes, 7 Favorites )
Augustus Rookwood engineers the capture of Lily Evans Potter from the Department of Mysteries. She's handed over to another Death Eater with a chip on his shoulder and a notorious ability to hold a grudge.
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About cmwinters
Author
cmwinters
Member Since 2006 | 13 Stories | Favorited by 37 | 582 Reviews Written | 248 Review Responses
Avatar blank done by LeDevineMarqiuse, adaptation done by Creamuts for me per request.
I am: an unrepentant Snape supporter, female, mid-thirties, a person that loves me the het and gen fic, a big fan of Darkfic and Death Eater fic, a person that doesn't t like werewolves, a person that doesn't care for about 99% of the slash, which (despite vehement protestations to the contrary), does not make me homophobic. I just don't like AU and OOC, and that's what most slash is. At least, most of what I've seen.
Really if you want to know more about me, my LJ is a better place for this.
Reviews for His Heart's Desire
Hey,
This one-shot is written extremely well.
I truly appreciate the skillful use of psychology with the Slytherins accurately predicting that Lily would succumb to the blackmail once she saw the imprisoned "James". The set-up was very ingenious.
It was also interesting that Snape wanted his victim to "enjoy" the abuse. You're on to something here - Snape, who has always been rejected due to his greasiness, poor hygiene, and nasty personality actually wants to be desired, there's no doubt. Ironically, his "master" has pretty much the same issues even if they manifest themselves differently.
The only thing I'd reproach you is the way you described Lucius. I understand that they all hate Muggleborn. Think that they are inferior race, but Lucius is still an aristocrat, I would somehow imagine him to have more self-restraint - right now he seemed to have been taunting Lily as a schoolboy....
It's debatable, I understand, not to mention that his dear son, whiny Drakey-poo, didn't act like an aristocrat at all - he only boasted "my father this and my father that", but still...adult man acting so childishly...is it normal?
Otherwise a truly brilliant one-shot with a lot veiled psychology - my favourite kind.
Best!
Response from cmwinters (Author of His Heart's Desire)
Wow! Thank you for the lovely review, and thank you for the concrit. I was lamenting to a friend of mine that I didn't really get any feedback on my writing in school; I'd get GRADES, but as for constructive feedback, I didn't get that until I started doing fanfiction. I wrote this particular story at a prompt for an exchange (i'm not at all a fan of Creepy!Stalker! Snape), and I also wrote it four years ago. I haven't written much for years; my muse is perfectly happy to write the story in my head but not type it. I am, however, paying closer attention to reading techniques in my pleasure reading, hoping to improve.Good point about Severus versus the Dark Lord; I hadn't considered that, although the Dark Lord is at least consistently described as attractive and charming (er, in his younger years, anyway).
Response from cmwinters (Author of His Heart's Desire)
Wow! Thank you for the lovely review, and thank you for the concrit. I was lamenting to a friend of mine that I didn't really get any feedback on my writing in school; I'd get GRADES, but as for constructive feedback, I didn't get that until I started doing fanfiction. I wrote this particular story at a prompt for an exchange (i'm not at all a fan of Creepy!Stalker! Snape), and I also wrote it four years ago. I haven't written much for years; my muse is perfectly happy to write the story in my head but not type it. I am, however, paying closer attention to reading techniques in my pleasure reading, hoping to improve.Good point about Severus versus the Dark Lord; I hadn't considered that, although the Dark Lord is at least consistently described as attractive and charming (er, in his younger years, anyway).
Love your darkfics/dark, sexual Sev, and a Lily depicted with human needs and responses...and keeping Malfoy the elitist, geneticist he is...really well-done.
Response from cmwinters (Author of His Heart's Desire)
Thank you! This one was a request; stalkery-Snape kinda weirds me out, but is at least canon. :pThank you for your lovely review!
Wow! That was jaw-dropping amazing! "wipes brow, shakes of sweat from trembling hand" I'm going to have to take a breather before I can read any other fanfics for a while. A thousand points to your House!
A well mixed combination of hot and horrible, and nicely executed, too. Thanks for sharing :)
Very clever. Dark, but I do dark. Very good job for Creepy!Snape.Livvy
Response from cmwinters (Author of His Heart's Desire)
Thank you! I don't like to ambush people with stuff they don't like to read, but I do like the darkfic myself!Thanks for the review!
Oh my lord, its so awful, but brilliant. They should have been clever enough to make her swear not to go into hiding, though. Ah well. Genius writing, dear winters!
Response from cmwinters (Author of His Heart's Desire)
But if they'd made her swear to go into hiding then she'd have died by breaking the Unbreakable Vow! ;) And then she wouldn't have been able to jump in front of Harry to save him, and that really would've screwed the series up haha!