Decision Making

A big thank you to Madbrilliant, for the beta of this chapter!

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Chapter 13 - Decision Making

It was always easier to make decisions for other people, but unfortunately, less so for one's self.

It had been three days since Hermione had gone to St. Mungo's and discovered that she was pregnant. The night before, she had been unable to sleep, and had Flooed Ginny Potter in the middle of the night, distraught and crying her eyes out to her younger best friend. Ginny had encouraged her to tell Severus, but she had lost her nerve at the last minute every time and simply kissed him until the questioning look in his eyes had disappeared. Since she had been on her prenatal Potion, the symptoms had cleared-up just as the Healer had said.

She had resumed sleeping in his arms at night, and had made love to him just the night before so that he was reassured that she still wanted him, but he was still suspicious of her. She hated keeping things from him, and seeing the slight hurt in his eyes that told her he knew something was going on. Running a hand through her bedraggled curls, she sighed and sat up from his bed, walking into the bathroom and standing in front of the basin and mirror. She washed her face and dried it with a hand towel. She sighed, looking at the dark circles beneath her eyes from being unable to sleep properly.

'Hermione?' asked a voice from the doorway.

Hermione saw Severus in the mirror standing behind her, and she turned to smile at him and walked over to him. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she leaned up and gave him a kiss on the cheek. He returned the embrace and led them both back to the bedroom, scooping her up and placing her on the bed. She was wearing a cotton nightie, and he was in silky sleep pants. He climbed back in beside her and wrapped his arms around her waist, snuggling up to her.

'Are you alright, Hermione?' he asked softly, pressing a kiss to the nape of her neck.

She nodded. 'I'm fine. Just having a bit of trouble getting to sleep is all,' she lied smoothly, feeling bad for doing it. She wanted to tell him, but she was afraid of the rejection.

'Are you sure about that?' he pressed, giving her a light squeeze and stroking her side outside of her nightie.

'Yes, I'm sure. Go back to sleep, Sev,' she insisted, turning in his arms and embracing him back, pecking him on the lips and snuggling her face into his neck, breathing in the spicy scent of his skin.

Soon after, Hermione heard his breathing even out, and she closed her eyes, listening to the sound of his breathing. If anything could soothe her frazzled nerves, it would be the sound of his breathing or heartbeat. Eventually, she too found respite and slept with him until the morning light began to filter through a small gap in the curtains. When she opened her eyes and looked around, she realised that she was alone in bed, and the shower was going in the bathroom. She smiled and got up, heading into the bathroom, all the while, shrugging out of her nightie. She slid the door open and stepped into the long, firm body already in there.

'Good morning, sweet,' Severus greeted, turning to face her and pull her into him, sliding the door closed behind her.

Hermione moved under the spray a little more and she moved closer to him, letting the water beat down on her. 'Good morning, love,' she replied, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him.

Needless to say, the kisses turned increasingly more passionate, and half an hour later, they emerged from the bathroom, slightly waterlogged, wrapped in towels, but very, very much sated. Hermione cast a drying charm over her body and wrapped the towel back around her, tucking the loose end in under her arm. Severus emerged and saw Hermione sitting on his bed, looking a little tired still, and although she was smiling, he could see the guilt in her eyes. He knew she would talk to him when she was ready, but it was really killing him not to know.

'You look like an angel,' he murmured, walking over to her with a black towel wrapped around his hips. 'Albeit a fallen one with that black towel on.'

She grinned and pulled him over to her, using his towel as leverage, and made him sit next to her on the bed. He fell onto his back and tugged her to lie down beside him. He kissed her and hugged her close to him, breathing in the smell of berries and vanilla, letting her scent soothe him. He pressed his ear to her chest and listened to the beating of her heart, feeling a little silly. He had never been so affectionate with anyone in his life. But he loved Hermione, and even if he hadn't said it, he still thought he should at the very least treat her like he did.

'Severus?' she asked, gently running her fingers through his hair.

'Yes, my sweet?' he murmured against her chest.

'I have something to talk to you about, and please listen to me first, because it is very important that you do,' Hermione started, and at feeling him nod against her, she took a deep breath to continue. 'Well, when I went out on Saturday, I did see Ginny, but it was more or less accidental. I actually ran into her at St. Mungo's because I had an appointment there, and she did too.'

Severus sat up abruptly and looked down at her curiously, a frown of confusion creasing his brow. 'What do you mean, St. Mungo's?' he demanded, his panic beginning to escalate slowly. 'Are you sick? What happened?'

Hermione sat up and put her fingers to his mouth to still his lips, making shushing noises to calm him down. 'No, no, it's nothing like that,' she said automatically, and he seemed to relax a little bit after that. 'I was feeling very sick all of last week, which was why I was sticking to my own chambers. I'm sorry to have kept that from you, but I wanted to deal with it myself.'

Severus nodded. 'I understand, but I wish you would have told me,' he said, clicking his tongue in disapproval. 'I don't want you to be unwell and think that I would not care for you.'

Hermione nodded in acceptance. 'Next time I won't keep it from you,' she promised. 'But that isn't the whole story. I got there, and a Healer asked me my symptoms. She cast a charm over me, and then...' Her voice caught in her throat, and her bottom lip began to tremble a little as tears formed in her eyes.

'What is it, love?' he asked seriously, hugging her close and stroking her back. 'You can tell me anything, you know this.'

She just shook her head and sobbed louder, and Severus scooped her up into his lap and rocked her as she cried, stroking her hair and holding her. He was so scared of crying women, as he had never known what to do with them. And yet, there he was, faced with the worst crying woman he had ever seen, and it was like second nature to him; holding her, stroking her and murmuring soothing things into her ear. A little while later she calmed down and stopped sobbing.

'Hermione?' he asked, tipping her chin up to face him. 'You can tell me what is wrong, my pet. I will hear you out.'

She sniffled and burrowed into his chest. 'Impregnantsevimsosorry,' she mumbled quickly into his skin.

'What was that?' he asked in confusion. 'Speak up, pet.'

She took a deep breath and sat up on his lap, looking him in the eyes. 'I'm pregnant,' she said clearly. 'I am so sorry, Sev. I can't believe I forgot about contraceptives, and I know it's my fault...'

He pressed a finger to her mouth, stilling her lips. He was stunned, but he still wanted her to stop blaming herself. She was pregnant. He was most definitely the father. She was blaming herself for not thinking about contraception. That last thought snapped him back to reality, and he held her face between his hands.

'Hermione, my sweet, dearest, pet,' he murmured, kissing the end of her nose. 'You are in no way to blame for this at all. You weren't the only one having sex, if I can recall correctly. It is just as much my own fault for forgetting. In fact, more so mine, as I am the older of the two of us.'

She swallowed thickly. 'Then you aren't mad at me?' she asked.

'Darling, I could never be mad at you for this. A baby! I can't even believe it,' he exclaimed, kissing her soundly on the lips. 'I never thought I would be a father.'

She smiled meekly. 'Then you'll probably need to know that we're having twins,' she said quietly.

'Are you serious?' he asked, his eyes growing wide. She nodded. He grinned widely, feeling elation run through him like he had never felt before. He was going to be a father! Hermione was giving him twins! The Snape line would not end with him. And he loved her so much it was possible that his heart might burst from filling up with love. 'I love you, Hermione.'

'What?' she asked in shock, her eyes wide.

'I said, I love you,' he replied, unable to stop the words at his lips. He never thought he would be able to admit it out loud, but apparently he could.

Hermione beamed at him then, hugging him around the neck and kissing him passionately, tangling tongues with him and moving herself to straddle his lap. 'I never imagined you would say that to me,' she said breathlessly when she pulled back. 'I love you too, so very much.'

He smiled one of the truest smiles he had ever smiled and kissed her again, unable to get enough of her. They made love again and it was beautiful, passionate and filled with their shared love. Afterwards, they cleaned up quickly, and got dressed in haste, before heading down from his chambers and office to arrive before everyone else in the Great Hall. He pulled out her seat for her and let her sit, kissing her palm before seating himself in the Headmaster's chair.

'You have made me inordinately happy, pet,' he murmured softly as the other staff members began to walk into the hall.

'You have made me happy too,' she replied so softly that nobody else would be able to hear her. 'I love you.'

Soon enough, the rest of the staff members were seated and the students were beginning to filter into the hall. Breakfast appeared on the table, and Hermione hungrily dug in, scowling at Severus' amused smile. He loved seeing her eat so heartily. She had been picking at her food a little the past few days, and so it was beautiful to see her eating the way she used to again.

Later, as they walked out of the Hall and back up to Hermione's office, Severus took her hand and caressed the back of her hand as they walked. He didn't care if anyone saw them. He was going to be a father – the father of her children. She was the most beautiful woman he had ever known, and if people knew he was with Hermione, he would not be ashamed.

'I love you,' he said when they reached her office door.

'I love you too,' she replied, kissing his lips tenderly.

If anyone had seen or gasped, Severus and Hermione were completely oblivious to it.