Chapter 29: Regret

Chapter 29: Regret

Severus stomped back to his quarters, frustration pouring out of him with every step. Dumbledore had told him to protect Rosetta in his absence and that's exactly what he'd been trying to do. Dumbledore had rightly predicted that Rosetta would want to get to the bust of Paracelsus tonight and that she would be carrying a book. He'd told Severus that it was important that he stop her from doing anything rash and to take the book from her. Merlin knew he'd asked why over and over but the old man refused to give him a straight answer, merely saying that it was important to let events unfold and to ensure Rosetta was safe and not involved in any way.

He'd tried his best to be reasonable and make her trust him. And then she'd seen the Dark Mark on his arm and had assumed the worst; that he was on Voldemort's side, that he'd wanted to destroy the book or to harm her, which was simply not true. But what could he have said to make her think any differently? Their friendship, such as it was, was incredibly fragile and it wasn't as if he and Rosetta had been on particularly good terms from the outset. But she was the closest thing he'd had to a friend, to romance even, for many years.

Severus sank down on his bed and put his head in his hands. He'd remembered her from his schooldays, of course. She had been a few years below him and in Ravenclaw, and she had always been trying to spin some money-making scheme or other. If he were honest with himself, Severus had been jealous of her entrepreneurial spirit back then and had found her to be equally insufferable and alluring.

But as time wore on it had become increasingly clear that she had no recollection of him at all from days past. Severus felt guilty then, for it must have been his Memory Modifying Charm which had been too powerful and affected her memory. He'd revisited that event many times, another piece of his bleak history he wished he could undo.

He rose from the bed and walked over his bureau, flipping down the lid. Inside the cupboard was a Pensieve, churning with white mist, the memory in question already swirling in the depths. He gripped his hands either side of the bowl and pushed forwards until he could see a small picture of a Hogwarts corridor. Further and further he went, and bigger and bigger the image got, until he flipped over and landed inside the memory, next to his Year 6 self.

His younger self was standing in the shadows at the end of the corridor watching his Housemate, Mulciber, trying to steal money from a Year 4 Ravenclaw: a young Rosetta Stone.

"Give it here. All of it."

Mulciber's face twisted into a cruel smile and he held his left hand out with a beckoning gesture. Rosetta scowled back at him, her fingers gripping defiantly around the small pouch of coins.

To be fair, thought the older Severus as he looked on, she'd earned that money fair and square through hours spent toiling away on other people's homework. Including Mulciber's homework. It's not like Mulciber needed the gold, though. His family, unlike the Snapes, were absolutely loaded.

"Come on. Give it to me. Or you might find yourself on the end of a Cruciatus curse."

Mulciber drew his wand silkily with his right hand and aimed it squarely at Rosetta's chest. Rosetta's jaw tensed as her eyes flicked from the wand back to the older boy's face. To give her credit, her expression stayed neutral, but she must have been scared.

They all knew he was bluffing though; an Unforgiveable Curse would be a one-way ticket to Azkaban. But Severus didn't doubt that he was quite capable of hurting her nonetheless. There was the incident with Mary Macdonald, on whom Mulciber attempted to use Dark Magic. Those rumours would not have escaped Rosetta. Pranks, most of the Slytherins had called it. Everyone else knew it to be good old-fashioned bullying. And here Rosetta was: trapped, wandless and alone in a dead-end corridor, facing up to the bully himself.

"I'm losing my patience, Stone."

Mulciber twitched his wand and all of a sudden her scarf began to unravel and fell on to the floor. Another twitch and her tie began to loosen, the ends unknotting and unfurling around her neck. Rosetta grabbed at it, panic rising on her face, but it slipped through her fingers like water.

"You can lose the gold, or you can lose your clothes. It's your choice." Mulciber took a step towards her, leering.

Now her cardigan had begun to unbutton, and Rosetta breathed hard. She looked like a cornered animal trying to weigh up her options. Her grip tightened on the coin pouch and she closed her eyes, as the cardigan began pulling and pulling to be free of her arms.

Severus continued to watch from the shadows as his younger self silently walked up behind Mulciber.

"Now, now, Mulciber. I think she's got the message."

Mulciber's head snapped round and Rosetta's eyes shot open. Almost immediately the cardigan stopped tugging and she shrugged it back on to her arms, pulling it closed around her.

"Snape! What did you do that for?" Mulciber was furious.

The younger Snape walked forwards slowly so he was now standing alongside his House mate.

"After the McDonald incident, which nearly got us expelled, perhaps it may be prudent if you showed a little more... restraint?" His tone was calm and even, but did little to ease Mulciber's ire.

"Since when do you care about restraint?" the boy sneered in response. "You found it hilarious!"

"I care about what happens when we leave this school." He looked pointedly at other boy. His words were clearly loaded with meaning.

Mulciber chewed on the side of his mouth with frustration. He paused, as if weighing something up, and then without warning pulled his wand vertically from top to bottom yelling "Diffindo!" and there was an almighty rip as Rosetta's clothes fell from her as if cleaved in two by an axe. She let out a yelp of surprise as she struggled to cover herself with the remaining rags.

"Don't say I didn't warn you, Stone," he smirked, his eyes roving up and down hungrily for a moment. But then he turned his attention to Snape. "You'd better not be going soft, Snape. I'm sure our mutual friend would want to know if you've lost your bottle."

The look that the younger Snape gave to Mulciber was icy cold. "Our mutual friend values intelligence, which given your behaviour is something you seem to be tragically lacking. If you think reports of your pathetic attempt at petty larceny will impress him, then you're sadly mistaken."

It was clear Mulciber had no retort for that. His face was like thunder as he turned and stamped off down the corridor, his boots clicking angrily on the polished wood. Both Snape and Rosetta watched him turn the corner, before Snape turned to Rosetta.

She was shaking as she clutched the remnants of her clothing around her. Wordlessly, Snape took off his cloak and handed it to her, averting his gaze. Rosetta never took her eyes off him as she fumbled with the cloak, finally covering her modesty.

"Thank you," she managed in a cracked voice.

"Do not thank me."

This wasn't about saving a damsel in distress, however much it looked that way, the older Severus remembered. He was saving his own skin. He was saving himself from expulsion. He was saving a friend from making a stupid mistake which would make both of them look bad in front of the Dark Lord. There were only two things Snape wanted in the world back then: firstly, to graduate Hogwarts with impeccable grades after learning as much as he possibly could about magic and secondly, to become a Death Eater. He wasn't about to let a friend's retarded actions ruin either of those things for him.

Satisfied she was now decent, the younger Snape's eye's met Rosetta's as he pondered what to do next. She was a Ravenclaw, which meant she would be astute enough to work out the veiled references to their mutual friend. Also, an attack like this could not go unreported: Rosetta was clearly shaken, which would attract the attention of her Housemates who would inevitably coax out of her what had happened and then tell Dumbledore. His name would be dragged into it alongside Mulciber's and then there would be hell to pay. Yes, it was too risky to simply let her go.

Rosetta fumbled with her pouch of coins and pulled out a fat Galleon, holding it with a trembling hand towards Snape.

Snape merely shook his head and raised his wand, bearing down on Rosetta. Her eyes widened in shock and the scream never left her throat before Snape cried, "Obliviate!"

The older Severus watched as the surprisingly powerful spell knocked Rosetta out cold. Before she could hit the ground, the young Snape scooped her up in his arms and carried her to a nearby bench where he laid her down as if she were merely resting, the pouch of gold still clutched in her small hand.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, before walking down the corridor back to the Slytherin Common Room.

With enormous effort, Severus pulled himself out of the Pensieve feeling utterly wretched. He had been an accessory to the attack. He should have gone to Dumbledore with her, he should have done the right thing. But he had been so preoccupied with power, with his own self-interests, with his future. Rosetta had every right to despise him, whether she remembered the incident or not. She'd seen the Dark Mark and in a way that seemed liked divine penance for having lived in ignorance of his behaviour for so long. But now she knew the truth: he was a selfish, conniving man who carried too much darkness inside him to be anything other than bad. He deserved everything he got.

After all, didn't any woman who got close to him end up being hurt, or worse?

With shaking hands, he reached for the half-empty bottle of Firewhisky on the sideboard and drank it straight from the neck.