Chapter Three

Harry lay awake for a long time, mulling the night's revelations over in his mind; even as he did he realised that Lupin had skilfully steered him away from the one thing he really needed to know. What had happened the day of the incident at the Shrieking Shack? He found his mind shying away as different possibilities presented themselves. He just knew that his father had been heavily involved, but the why's and how's evaded him.

He hoped it wasn't too bad, but whatever it was he intended to find out the truth, and if Snape loathed him for it, so be it. He thought that unlikely though; men didn't stand shoulder to shoulder, holding one another up in the face of the direst adversity, just to hate one another the next day. And he and Snape had done that; when Harry had finally defeated Voldemort last year, it had been Snape who had been at his side, Snape who had given him the strength and shown him the way, Snape who had almost been killed himself, defending Harry, and giving him the room to make his final moves.

Harry had learnt now to ignore the barbs sent his way, learnt to recognise that Snape spoke to everyone in the same way, that he had just taken it so personally because of the history that was there, a history he thought he was beginning to unravel. He thought of the way Snape spoke to Sirius; that was worse than any way in which he had ever spoken to Harry, and yet he knew that it all masked the deep feelings Snape probably didn't know how to handle any other way, and maybe didn't even know he had.

Harry found himself wondering how they were getting on: probably fighting, probably spitting venom at one another as usual, because they didn't know what else to do. He'd felt humbled when Ginny had told them about Severus going to Azkaban, and he hadn't failed to notice that Lupin seemed to envy Snape the knowledge that he, for one, had not deserted Sirius. All those years ... Harry drifted off, hoping maybe somehow that they had a better tomorrow.

*****

Severus woke to find his neck stiff and his throat parched ... and his arms around another man; he didn't need to look to know who it was. Maybe if he didn't stir or think he wouldn't fully waken and find himself clutching another dream instead. It was no use though; he'd have to move, he had to have a drink of water, about four gallons should do, he needed to straighten his neck, and he really needed to pee ... he wanted to stay right where he was, and never let go.

Sirius groaned in his sleep as Snape untangled himself, stood up and padded into his bathroom. When he came out Sirius still appeared to be asleep; Severus knew he wasn't. He let the tap in the stone sink in his workbench run cold for a moment, and drew a long glass of water, drank it off, and drew another. He sat down beside Sirius, afraid to say anything, afraid he'd make yet another mess of it. He ran his long-fingered white hand across Sirius's cheek, brushing away the mass of dark brown hair.

'I'm going to bed. I'm too old to lie freezing on a settee all night, even when I'm drunk.' He put twenty-five years of peace proposals into his few words. 'Are you coming?'

He had stripped off, and was already in bed, when he heard the creak of the settee as Sirius stood up. Severus could feel him walking through to the bathroom, heard water running, heard the soft slap of bare feet on the polished stone of the bedroom floor. He felt the mattress move as Sirius swung himself into bed ... beside him, and thought his heart would explode as he felt their naked bodies meet in a tight embrace.

They held one another for a long time, letting the beautiful silence wash away the pain; for now it was enough, more than enough.

*****

'Where's Sirius?' Ron asked through a mouthful of toast. They usually raced one another to see who could be the latest down for breakfast, and as Ron had won that day, he was anxious to make up for any lost time.

'Dunno,' Harry said evasively.

'I think he went out last night,' Ginny offered. 'Probably went to try and find Severus.'

'We're not on about that again ... please,' Ron groaned.

'You were the one who started it,' Hermione pointed out. 'Anyway, you shouldn't talk with your mouth full.'

Harry smiled; it was always the same at breakfast: a round of pleasant bickering, ending with Ron getting a row from Hermione.

Lupin began to pour the tea; it looked hot and brown, obviously Kreacher was still sulking elsewhere.

*****

For the moments between sleep and wakefulness Sirius couldn't imagine where he was; it was that delicious half-consciousness when it's warm and comfortable, and coming awake hasn't been forced. He groaned and felt Severus's arms around his waist; that felt good. He pushed himself back into the embrace as he felt Snape's mouth on his neck; that felt fucking wonderful.

'I thought you were going to sleep all day.'

'I still may,' Sirius murmured, turning to meet Snape's black eyes. 'I'm sure the world will get along fine without me.'

'I suspect the world has already sent out an advance search party for you.'

'You overestimate me ... and underestimate their powers of deduction.'

'I suppose you really are that obvious.'

Sirius tried to smile. 'Pity the only person who failed to notice was you.'

'Let's not talk, Sirius ... we're not very good at that, I'm afraid. Let the past deal with itself.'

'I need to talk ... I need to know how you could have believed I'd do ... well, you know what I mean.'

'Finish with me by sending me to get killed by a werewolf? Why not just say it if you've been burning to ask for twenty-five years?'

'You're no better,' Sirius flared. 'You had to fucking ask me over a board game on Christmas night ... in front of everyone.'

'Oh yes, let us not forget their sensibilities ... let us not upset Lupin or the kiddies. That would never do, would it?' Snape pulled the sheets aside and began to heave himself up.

'Don't you dare get out of this bed ... damn you, Severus.' Sirius pulled Snape's arm down and caught him off balance, so that he landed half on top of him. 'That's better.'

'I don't know why you have come here ... what you hope to gain by pursuing this conversation. The whole thing is madness. Let us pretend that I didn't get drunk, and you stayed in Grimmauld Place ... that way we can go back to normal. There is nothing else.' Snape tried to pull away. 'I must get up. I have to see Lucius.'

'Fuck Lucius, he can wait. You're not going anywhere,' Sirius said, deciding to try a different tack. 'The kiss was good,' he said. 'In fact they all enjoyed it. Hermione nearly wet herself.'

'How gratifying.'

Sirius smiled to himself. He really didn't know where to start here, but he was glad Severus didn't either; he noticed though that he hadn't moved from where he landed on top of him. It was a pity they had both been so drunk last night; they could have had this awkwardness out of the way by now; then again, if they'd been sober he'd still be in Grimmauld Place.

'I think she fancies you.'

Severus heaved himself up a bit. 'Don't be ridiculous ... now I really need to get ready,' he said unconvincingly as he dropped his head again.

'And I really need to make love.' Sirius felt Snape stiffen and then slowly relax a little. He dropped the hand that wasn't trapped under Severus's body to his cock, and was rewarded with a low groan. 'I think you do too.'

*****

It was late in the afternoon when Sirius ambled into the kitchen at Grimmauld Place. Hermione and Ginny were taking trays of fresh scones out of the oven, trying valiantly to keep up with the others who were scoffing them as fast as they produced them. He noticed that Bill Weasley had joined them too. They had all turned as Sirius came in, all pointedly looking behind him.

Sirius looked behind himself as well. 'Have I grown a tail?' he asked.

'Don't think so,' Ron said, spraying a few crumbs.

'Are you alone?' Harry asked.

'Nope... you're all here.'

'He means, he thought you were with Severus, and now it appears you're not,' Ginny translated.

'Ahh.' Sirius sat at the table, and picked up a scone and the butter knife. 'Any tea?'

'Weren't you with Severus?' Harry asked. Direct questioning seemed to work for Ginny; he thought he'd give it a try.

Sirius gave him a "mind your own business" look. 'Pass me the jam, Harry,' he said by way of an answer.

'Filthy perverted scum,' Mrs Black announced as they heard the front door click closed about half an hour later. 'I can smell the depravity from my grave....' She trailed off and continued mouthing soundlessly, as Snape lowered his wand and swept his sea of black into the kitchen.

Harry watched him closely; he favoured Ginny with his usual twist of the lip, gave Bill a nod that Harry tried to read, and totally ignored everyone else, until he asked Remus to hand him a cup.

'That was quick,' Sirius remarked as Snape sat opposite him.

'I hope that damned elf didn't make this tea,' Snape said in place of a reply.

'Wasn't he in?' Sirius persisted.

Snape turned on him. 'One of the reasons I didn't marry Bellatrix was that I didn't care to answer questions about my movements.'

'Was the other that even that mad cow wouldn't have you?'

'No ... it was the thought of marrying into the Blacks actually.'

Bill snorted a laugh. 'God, are you two still at it?'

'At what?' Sirius asked, and looked to the hall to where his mother was still mouthing her silent obscenities.

Kreacher was standing in front of the portrait, wringing his hands; he had great tears leaking down his face. He slunk into the kitchen a few moments later, tears miraculously dried. 'Kreacher sees the House Traitor has returned with the abomination not far behind him,' he said with a sly grin. 'Kreacher will not allow them to defile his mistress's house with their vile corrupted acts.'

'Shut up, you horrible little piece of vermin,' Hermione snarled at him.

'So much for S.P.E.W.' Ron remarked to his tea cup, as Harry gave her a shocked look.

'The Mudblood speaks. Kreacher hears, but does not listen.' The elf tugged Bill's sleeve, and tried to pass him a chipped cup filled with grey liquid. 'Tea, Curse-Breaker?' he asked. 'The Curse-Breaker is well rid of the whore's bastard,' he added in a confidential loud whisper. 'My poor mistress sobs alone at the downfall of her house, and poor Kreacher is alone too, as he performs his corruptions upon...'

He didn't get the chance to finish; Snape stood up and grabbed his tea towel at the neck, marched into the hall, and stuffed the elf into the portrait. 'Now neither of you needs to be alone ever again.' He shut the curtains.

'Hey, who's going to do the cleaning now?' Sirius objected.

'Cleaning?' Snape looked up at the cobwebbed ceiling. 'Have you seen this place?'

Lupin sat at the end of table. He watched their little tableau with some sort of wishful affection; they were putting on a good act, but he wasn't fooled. He hoped the two of them could keep from rubbing one another up the wrong way for long enough to heal some of the wounds; he thought they just might.

*****

'I really want to know, Sirius, and I think I've got the right.' Harry swallowed some Butterbeer; they'd run out of Budweiser.

'It's all a very long time ago ... and it just doesn't matter any longer.'

'It does to me ... tell me, how did he do it?' Harry just wanted it confirmed now; he reckoned he'd worked it out himself; after all, he'd done much the same thing himself once.

Sirius lit a cigarette and watched him; he supposed Harry did have the right, they all did. 'You won't like it,' he said quietly.

'I know that,' Harry reasoned. 'What did he do? Use Polyjuice and pretend to be you?'

Sirius nodded.

'Why?'

'He fancied Severus ... couldn't understand when he kept knocking him back. At first he thought it was because of Lucius,' Sirius said in some sort of explanation. 'But Severus never returned Lucius's feelings for him; Lucius was just a spare shag to him.'

'Lucius Malfoy?' Harry exclaimed. 'Lucius Malfoy fancied Snape?'

'Lucius was besotted by him... always was... still is. Anyway it wasn't Malfoy's doing, it was Peter's... Peter must have been spying on us for a long time, and he told James... and James went off the deep end.'

'But why? It's not as though my father owned Snape.' Harry frowned. It was too much; it didn't make sense.

'A combination of things. Probably just that it had been going on for so long and he didn't even know ... and it only came to light when James fancied a slice of Slytherin for himself.'

'So he took Polyjuice and lured Snape to Lupin, pretending he was you?' Harry had guessed it, but somewhere he'd prayed for a denial.

'Yes, but he got cold feet, and tried to drag Snape back when he changed back from the Polyjuice.'

Harry couldn't remember ever being so angry in his life. 'He let you take the blame? He was a spoilt brat, who was upset because someone else was playing with a toy he wanted... and for all these years you've covered up for him? Are you insane? You ruined your life for him ... not once, fucking twice. Fuck sake!' Harry ranted, springing to his feet. 'You were sixteen. When are you going to stop picking up the tab, Sirius?'

Sirius just looked at him. 'You don't understand.'

'Actually, I do. You're the one who doesn't understand... James is dead. He wasn't the great saint you all pretend he was. He was just a guy, just a spoilt boy from a rich family, who thought he was entitled to whatever he wanted,' Harry said, explaining to himself as much as Sirius, as he went along. 'He wasn't a bad guy for all that, but he was just a guy... so why don't you put it a-fucking-way?'

'Harry...' Sirius began.

'You're a real fucking martyr, aren't you?' Harry sat back down, exhausted by his own fury, and only a little shocked by his own profanities. He shook his head slowly at the madness of it all. 'You owe yourself more than this, Sirius. Have you told Severus?'

'No. He doesn't need to know.'

'Yes, he does. And if you don't tell him I will.'

'Sirius is right, Potter. I do not need to know.'

Harry started, and spun to where Snape stood in the doorway, resting his tall lean frame against the upright. 'How long have you been listening?' he asked.

'Long enough. Can we leave this now?' Severus looked to where Sirius sat; he'd dropped his head to his hands when Snape had shown himself. 'I need to go out just now.'

Sirius looked up, and Harry was surprised to see a ghost of his usual grin on his face. 'Don't get so involved shagging that fat bimbo that you can't remember your way back.'

Snape arched an eyebrow at him. 'What fat bimbo? I'm going to see Lucius.'

He swept out, but not before Harry saw his smirk. Somehow that warmed him; somehow he knew this was the way these two would always deal with one another. He didn't miss the soft glint in Sirius's eyes either.

*****

'Severus?'

It was well into the next afternoon when the voice issued from Snape's study. The two men exchanged looks as Snape heaved himself out of bed; this time Sirius didn't try to stop him.

'Give me a second. I'm just coming,' Snape called, as he pulled on a black robe, tried gamely to make some sense of his ropey mass of hair, and padded towards his study.

'Sorry to disturb you. I assumed you would be up by now,' Dumbledore said mildly. 'It was actually Sirius I wanted to speak to.'

'Sirius?' Snape asked stupidly.

'Yes. Sirius Black... quite tall, long dark hair... you must have heard of him. Quite notorious at one time; he was in all the papers.' Dumbledore looked over Snape's shoulder to where Sirius now stood in the bedroom doorway, wearing just a pair of black trousers and a sheepish grin.

'Damnit, Albus, I was in disguise.' Sirius gave him another grin, this time brief and unabashed, as he thought of Severus's shattered reputation. 'How did you know I was here anyway?'

'I know everyone who is at Hogwarts at any time,' Dumbledore replied, failing to mention the staggering exceptions of Voldemort, and Peter Pettigrew, and Sirius himself, but that was so much history now. 'Anyway, Argus saw you coming in.' He sat at Snape's table and gestured at the fireplace and the kettle. Only once he'd got himself comfortable, and had sorted his tea and his fire out, did he go on. 'I've had a complaint from the Portraits Commission,' he said, raising his teacup to his lips. 'It seems someone has been tampering with things at Grimmauld Place.'

'Portraits Commission? There's a Commission for all those horrible dusty old pictures hanging around everyone's houses?' Sirius blinked at him.

'Of course. Who else is going to look after their interests?' Dumbledore passed them cups of tea. 'It seems that someone at Grimmauld Place has placed a live body into the portrait of your esteemed mother.'

'I don't have an esteemed mother.'

'Whatever,' the Headmaster continued airily. 'Get it back out. We can't have live things running amok inside portraits; that would never do. Especially that little creep Kreacher. Merlin alone knows what havoc he'd create.'

Sirius gave Snape a look, and was pleased to see he appeared to be lost for words. 'It was him.'

'Yes, you always said that, I recall, Sirius.' Dumbledore turned to Severus. 'I'm not sure that I'd lift the Silencing Charm on Walburga though,' he said. 'The Commission did seem quite pleased about that. Anyway, get the elf out of the portrait, Severus.'

'I... I don't know how to.'

'I'm sure you'll manage... given that he's spreading all sort of malicious gossip about you...' Dumbledore said, trailing off suggestively. 'Within a week you won't have a secret left worth knowing,' he added, as a coup de grace, 'and will quite probably have inherited a few you never had anyway.'

Snape had gone a funny colour. 'What sort of gossip?'

'So far it's all true. I'd only really worry when he begins to make things up.'

'I'll kill that elf,' Snape said with real feeling.

'Good boy, that's the stuff... just get it out of the portrait first.' Dumbledore himself poured another cup of tea. 'He's been going on about one thing in particular, which is rather unfortunate. I'm sure even the redoubtable Walburga Black might have tempered him on this subject... had you left her with the wherewithal.'

'What subject?' Sirius grinned; he was quite enjoying this.

'Your father's infidelity, actually,' Dumbledore replied, inclining his head to Sirius.

Something began to dawn on Sirius about then, quite slowly at first. He turned and gave Severus a long look, trying to see similarities between them, satisfying himself that there were none. 'He can't be my brother,' he said in a whisper.

'He is.' The Headmaster began to rise. 'Half-brother to be precise.'

'But... that's incest,' Sirius spluttered, '... it's madness.'

'Oh, I wouldn't worry too much about that; it's not as though you intended to start a family.' Dumbledore turned in the doorway. 'Happy Christmas.'

The door closed behind him and Sirius turned to Severus.

'You just had to start with the fucking elf, didn't you? You had to show off.' He stood and pointed a finger at Snape. 'Get that bloody thing back out of that picture...' He trailed off for a moment at the look of horror on Snape's face. 'Severus, are you all right?' he asked. 'You're a funny colour.'

'It wouldn't be black, would it?' Snape replied.

'There's nothing wrong with Black,' Sirius replied, pouting a little. 'Anyway, you don't need to worry about marrying into the Blacks now... you are one,' he added gamely, not at all sure that was what Snape wanted to hear.

'Just goes to show the old adage is true,' Severus snapped back. 'You can choose your friends, but you can't choose your family.'

'There is a bright side,' Sirius remarked, uncapping Snape's whisky bottle and pouring two hefty slugs, content that at least he hadn't been tossed out in Dumbledore's wake. 'Mother will be apoplectic.'

'Hmmm,' Snape returned, lifting his glass. 'Perhaps it's the season of miracles after all.'

'Anyway,' Sirius said, raising his glass in a toast and nodding to the door Dumbledore had left through. 'The old buffer was lying.'

'Of course he was,' Severus replied. 'But I think I'll kill the elf anyway... just in case.'

*****