Chapter Four

Excerpt from Acing the Interview: From Apprenticeship to Workplace, by Wynn Farnstad

"...Dress conservatively. Dark robes are a must.

Even if the environment is casual, dress to impress. Your school cloak is not impressive.

Witches should wear a modest amount of makeup and be sure their hair is tastefully styled.

The interviewer is sure to ask about your worst traits. Make sure the worst thing you can say is that you show up early.

Outline your accomplishments and best traits, but don't boast.

Above all, relax and speak slowly..."

Hermione gasped. "Professor Snape?" she sputtered, then scowled and gestured to her lunch. "As I expect would be obvious, sir, I'm having lunch. Keema samosa and masoor dal, to be specific."

Snape found himself gobsmacked. "Miss Granger, I har..."

"Miss Granger!" Agnes exclaimed. "Oh, it's good to meet you!"

Caught off guard, both Snape and Hermione stared at Agnes.

Hermione was first to regain her composure. "I expect Snape still complains about me being a know-it-all in his classes?" she remarked dryly, extending a hand to Agnes.

Agnes smiled and shook Hermione's proffered hand. "Agnes Richards. I'm Mr. Snape's personal assistant. It's a pleasure."

"You must have nerves of steel," Hermione said admiringly. "Unless he's changed a vast amount since apparently returning from the dead," she remarked pointedly.

Snape sputtered, "Miss Richards not only has nerves of steel, she's remarkably competent and highly reliable. And I was never dead, I just like my privacy."

Hermione laughed and turned her gaze on Snape for a moment before smiling at Agnes. "Must be a change from classes full of recalcitrant students and scheming elder wizards. I've never heard him pay such a compliment before...Merlin knows how he hated my know-it-all, hand-waving ways."

"I did not say that, Miss Granger, " Snape replied, taken by the spots of pink on Hermione's cheeks and the sparkle in her eye.

"Forgive me, sir. I'm still only used to you as my strict professor who favored his own house at school. We've all changed since the war," she said, motioning to a waiter to pack up her lunch. "Please, don't let me keep you from your meal. It was nice to meet you, Agnes."

Agnes waved as Hermione made her way to the door.

"She's feisty!" Agnes said with approval. "It would be fun to have her in the office."

Snape put his head down on the table and muttered, "The two of you will conspire to send me to an early grave, I just know it."

**

Hermione made her way back to Grimmauld Place and had just tucked into her rewarmed lunch when an owl soared through the open kitchen casement. It landed near her plate, and she offered it half a samosa while she untied the letter it carried.

Master Granger,

P.P.S. Longbottom? Seriously?

She chuckled when she read the postscripts. Blaise had been aloof at school, but they had worked on a NEWT-level Charms project together in their re-done seventh year, and he had been nice enough...almost congenial. Hopefully that would work in her favour in the hiring process. Hermione set the letter aside and began to tuck into her lunch with gusto...her stomach was rumbling.

She was halfway through her dal when she realized that something wasn't right.

If Blaise knew she and Neville had been dating at all (even if it was just during the summers in a half-arsed fashion), that meant the company had done some serious background checks. She had expected a minor check...schooling, previous employment, criminal record...but why was it important to know who she was dating? And "new hairdo?" Was this 'Professor Harmonionus' a weirdo who was having her followed? Hermione shivered, despite the warm summer afternoon. She had never been happier to live in a Secret-Kept location and was glad Harry hadn't listened to her when she gently suggested that the need to keep Grimmauld Place under a Fidelius Charm had probably expired.

It had been a weird day already, and it was just barely noon. Running into not-dead Snape at a Muggle restaurant and having him treat her like a human being was one thing...she might have recovered from that with a Floo-call to Ginny or Luna...but being followed by a potential employer was downright creepy.

Nothing for it, she thought, packing away her half-eaten lunch. Weirdness of this magnitiude can only be solved by a long, hot bubble bath and a smutty novel.

***

At 9:15 on Monday morning, Blaise Zabini departed his comfortable primary office in the Secret-Kept W-Harmony corporate headquarters. He wanted plenty of time in the front office to prepare for his meeting with Granger. The boss said he should be charming, so he'd be charming. He had his favourite suit on...black pinstripes, with a pale lavender shirt, silver tie, and matching pocket-square. Dress to impress. Maybe he could get a date out of it...he couldn't believe Granger would be all that serious about Longbottom.

He slipped through the door to the street-front of the business and unlocked his secondary office. It wasn't as well appointed as the first, but since all he did was interview potential employees there, it didn't need to be. Still, one didn't run across an Arithmancy master like Granger very often, and he was pretty sure Snape wanted her for the position...they weren't interviewing anyone else. Blaise spent a few moments casting some housekeeping charms to improve the room's air and made sure the coffee service was ready and waiting.

Granger arrived at 10:00 on the dot.

"Blaise! How nice to see you again!" Hermione exclaimed, stepping forward to shake his hand.

"Hermione. Welcome to W-Harmony. Please, step into my office. Could I pour you a coffee or tea?"

Hermione settled herself into the very comfortable chair in the office. Blaise might have said "his," but the space was too clean and impersonal for it to be his regular office.

"Coffee please, two sugars. So, is this just the public front, and your real office is in the back? Your boss pulled a full background check, since you knew about Neville and my shorter hair, and an employer who does that much pre-interview investigation doesn't have all their secrets out on display."

Blaise took his time fixing the coffee. Two minutes into the interview, and she already had the better of him.

"Guilty as charged. The front office is where we interview new employees and potential clients come in to do initial paperwork and questionnaires and have initial match meetings."

Hermione nodded. "And I imagine the back office is either under a dizzying array of wards or Secret-Kept," she mused, watching his mouth fall open in shock. "No, don't tell me. I'd imagine you'd have to Obliviate me, and I don't much fancy that. Now shall we get on with it?"

Truth be told, it took a moment (and a discreet adjustment of his trousers) for Blaise to compose himself enough to begin the actual interview.

Hermione talked about her apprenticeship, special projects, and computer skills. She inquired how they planned to host a massive webserver in conjuction with a highly magical place of business and was not satisfied with Blaise's answer of 'we'll sort it out.' She made it clear that in no way would she spend her work week crammed into what used to be a supply closet with a massive amount of hot machinery.

When Blaise finally sent her on her way two hours later, his head was spinning. He stumbled back to his office and sat down heavily behind his desk to pen a note.

Boss,

BZ

***

Hermione set off for home with a spring in her step. There had been no other candidates waiting, nor had Blaise mentioned conducting other interviews...so she had felt safe raking him over the coals for information. She still didn't know who this Dr. Harmonious character was, but he wasn't going to pull one over on Hermione Granger!

***

Snape scowled as he read Blaise's note. More Slytherin than Slytherin? What a ridiculous concept. Granger was as Gryffindor as they came.

Zabini,

SS

"Miss Richards!"

Agnes poked her head in the door with a smile. "Sir?"

"I'm going to hire Granger if she can keep it together for a meeting with Harmonious. Have Malfoy at our firm check over the interview contract to be sure it's watertight. I don't want her to find even the tiniest loophole to exploit. I don't know if we can trust her yet."

Nodding, Agnes wrote down the request. "Shall I ask Mr. Malfoy to have the Muggle side of the firm look it over as well?"

"Absolutely. What would I do without your quick thinking, Miss Richards?" Snape replied quite seriously.

"I imagine you'd still be running this company out of that derelict two up, two down in Manchester, with public meetings in that poky little office space in Hogsmeade, sir," Agnes replied.

Snape glared. "No doubt, no doubt. Find out if Zabini needs a Cheering Charm, will you? Granger ate him for elevenses."

Agnes closed the door and went snickering to herself down the corridor.

***

Master Granger,

B. Zabini, Human Resources