Chapter 2
Chapter 2 of 2
pelespenHermione was livid. She was so angry in fact, that she had the Muggle taxi drop her off ten blocks away from Harry and Ginny's address. She only hoped that walking the remainder of the distance would cool her temper to a manageable level before she finally confronted her old "friends."
How could they be so utterly heartless? She fumed inwardly. Well, Ginny she could understand, but Harry? His own godfather! "He's the only family I've got," she bitterly recalled him saying of Sirius so long ago. Oh, how things change...
Her heart hurt for the dark-haired wizard as she thought of him trapped once again in that godforsaken house. Now, however, he was simply trapped by his own overly acute senses, and had been for three whole months. Did they not know? Sirius hadn't exactly volunteered the facts of what he was going through, but it wasn't that hard to figure out.
After breakfast, she had gone to Diagon Alley to pick up a few items mostly potion supplies for a Dreamless Sleeping draught she hoped might help Sirius. She had also done a bit of shopping in Muggle London to purchase bed linens and a sleek looking pair of dark sunglasses.
It had been a slightly odd request, but she had assumed it was just an offhand item that he hadn't felt up to tolerating the crowds in order to get. Now that she knew it was because he literally couldn't tolerate the daylight without them, however, she was furious.
It made perfect sense to her that after all Sirius had been through he would be having a sort of sensory overload. But because no one had bothered to address it, the man had been left to feel like a damned invalid when he was anything but.
~oOo~
Earlier that day...
Hermione's suspicions had been building throughout the morning as she recalled all the odd little details of Sirius' behaviour while she shopped.
At first she'd thought he was being silly and overly-flattering about the breakfast she'd cooked, until it became apparent that he was quite genuine in his enthusiasm.
And she knew, knew that the little CD player in the kitchen had been turned down to just barely above zero, because she'd only had it on loud enough to hear while she was sitting right next to it. Yet he had heard the music clearly enough to identify the album at the other end of the large room, over the clatter of dishes and cooking noises. She knew he might carry some residual sensory sharpness due to his Animagus form, but even that was pushing it.
He had cringed, almost painfully, when she'd started to open the curtain in the parlour to let some reading light in after breakfast. He hadn't said anything, but his shoulders had visibly relaxed when she'd dropped the tieback and let the heavy material fall back into place.
And she couldn't be certain, but after she had emerged from her room, showered and dressed to go out, as he paused in passing her on the stairwell, did he smell her?
Her thoughts started piecing themselves together into a theory as she fingered a set of high thread-count sheets in the linen store. They were her favorite, not too fancy or sleek, but incredibly soft. For some reason she had a fleeting thought of the coarse, twisted sheets in Sirius' bed from the night before. She glanced up at the price marker and was delighted to find they were on special, a two for one deal. She paused for barely a moment before grabbing four sets total, as well as a few fresh pillows.
Hermione chewed her lip contemplatively as she continued shopping. She didn't know exactly where Sirius had gone when he fell into the Veil in the Department of Mysteries. It was just always assumed that, being a doorway to the "other side," it signified death. Wherever he had been, it had been seven years since he'd fallen in. The return would most assuredly have been a shock, both mentally and physically. Harry hadn't mentioned anything about it in his letter, however.
She browsed through the display of sunglasses, a smile playing her lips as she pictured him. "Something sexy," he'd said with a grin. She found a sleek dark pair she thought would be perfect and took her purchases to the checkout.
When she returned to Grimmauld place, it was to find Sirius sweating over a large steaming cauldron in the old kitchen. She teased him about making her lunch, but quickly discovered he was stirring laundry. He smirked and rolled his eyes. "I know, I know... " he muttered, waiting to hear the lecture about getting a goddamn wand.
Instead Hermione shook her head. "Doesn't your wardrobe take care of that?"
"What?" he asked dumbly. It wasn't the question he was expecting.
"Your wardrobe, Sirius..." She drifted off, realizing that the wardrobe in his bedroom was probably older than he was, built long before the latest charmed wardrobes had become a common wizarding household item. But hadn't Harry seen to that?
Hermione blinked and cleared her throat. "Sirius," she explained, "they make charmed wardrobes now that clean everything for you. I went to school with the girl who invented the charm for them, actually. Would you mind if I?" she asked, motioning upstairs.
It took all of five minutes to charm the ancient old wardrobe to clean his clothes for him while he stood in the doorway to his bedroom watching with admiration and a touch of envy. When she was finished, she noticed the twisted bedclothes half-hanging on the floor and remembered her purchases. He tried to decline the new linens but she pushed them on him, insisting that she had no use for so many sets and besides, they were free.
"Bamboo?" he read the label with a skeptical look.
Hermione grinned wistfully with an emphatic 'yes' and tore open one of the bundles. The fabric spilled over his sensitive fingers and he fought back a sigh. He schooled his expression into a subdued smile and shrugged casually. "Pretty nice," he mumbled while his hands plunged greedily into the bundle of cool soft material.
With a quick glance at his hands, her suspicions were nearly affirmed.
Hermione prepared a neat lunch of sandwiches, brie, and fresh fruit from the stand up the street. She was torn between regret and fascination over her purchase of the sack of large, nearly black cherries. Witnessing the relish with which Sirius would bite into each fat fruit, his teeth slowly piercing the dark flesh, his lips slightly sucking at the juice before he would chew one half of the meat away from the pit, and then the other it was positively indecent. And he seemed utterly oblivious to the effect it was having on her.
"Oh," Hermione said, remembering suddenly. She reached into her bag, pulled out a pair of sunglasses, and pushed them across the table to Sirius. He paused halfway through a cherry and looked up at her with a pleased grin before licking the juice from his fingers and reaching for the shades.
"These are great, just perfect!" he exclaimed and slid them on his face, giving her a teasing smirk before jumping up from the table and bounding out of the kitchen.
After piling the dishes into the sink to clean themselves, Hermione found Sirius in the back yard. He was seated with his back to an old stone table, arms spread on either side of him, his face upturned to the sun. Her breath caught in her throat at the look of sheer joy on his face before she noticed just how pale his complexion was.
He hadn't noticed her yet; the bench where he was seated was at the far corner of the large back garden, and she was certain his eyes were closed as he basked in the warm sunlight. Hermione licked her lips and, without really considering it, she muttered his name, her voice no louder than a whisper.
Sirius immediately straightened and turned to her, his smile faltering slightly as he noticed her wide-eyed expression. He gave a resigned sigh and nodded as he patted the bench next to him. She was probably the brightest young witch he'd met since Lily Potter, so it came as little surprise that she'd figure it out sooner or later. As she crossed the lawn, he tried to brace himself for all of the impossible questions that were surely coming.
Hermione tucked one leg under her so she could face him as she sat down on the warm stone. She tilted her head, her brown eyes regarding him intently for a moment before she asked in a quiet voice, "Sirius, where were you?"
It was such a vague sounding question, yet he knew exactly what she was asking. Harry had asked him what was on the other side of the Veil. The healers who had examined him when he was found had asked him to describe everything he remembered. His one very brief experience with the press had consisted of a sea of irritating voices all asking some variation of, "what was it like?" And he'd faked them all out, usually shrugging it off as not remembering, or simply slamming the door in their face. His damaged state left him feeling like enough of a basket case without having to explain why. Yet for some reason, as she peered at him through the black lenses, searching for his own grey eyes, he felt the truth come tumbling out.
"Nowhere, Hermione," he replied. "It was Nowhere."
Her lips had parted slightly and a tiny crease formed between her eyebrows as she noticed the slight emphasis he placed on the word, like it was an actual place. He continued before she could ask.
"When that bitch knocked me into the archway, everything just went black and silent, and I felt nothing." Sirius looked over Hermione's shoulder, recalling.
"It took me a while to realize that I wasn't actually dead. I had no sense of form, no sense of of anything. The only thing I could experience at all were my own thoughts, and the cold." His gaze returned to her. "That's all it was."
His lips twisted sardonically. "It wasn't until I found myself asleep and dreaming that I realized I was somehow alive and still me. I mean, the dead don't sleep, right?"
Hermione remained silent as he continued. "I didn't know long I was stuck there, picking through every memory I've ever had, more than I was left with after Azkaban." He shook his head slightly. "But at some point, I had this feeling of being... not finished. The next thing I knew, I was standing in front of the archway, completely starkers, looking out into the room where the whole thing had happened. I knew if I looked behind me it was over, so I stepped through."
Sirius smiled wryly. "By chance I was found by that little blonde witch who was with you all when I fell in; she was working in the Department of Mysteries... Lovegood, I think. She sent for Kingsley, I got poked and prodded at St. Mungo's for a few hours, and now here I am."
Hermione licked her lips hesitantly. "You spent seven years in Nothing, Sirius?"
He gave a flippant smirk and turned his face to the sun again. "Yep."
"And that's why you haven't been to Diagon that's what you meant when you said it was too much," she whispered.
He let out an involuntary sigh, his tone thick with unexpected relief. "Yes."
He couldn't look at Hermione just yet. It felt surprisingly good to know that someone, specifically she, now knew the reason for his behaviour. He wasn't ready to taint that with the look of pity that was doubtlessly swimming in her eyes.
"Is it all five senses, or just sight and sound?" she asked, her tone almost clinical.
"It's everything," he replied.
"What did the healers say?"
"Oh, nothing I faked them," Sirius answered casually.
Hermione smirked. "Can't say I'm surprised," she muttered. "Just how... sensitive are we talking about?"
Sirius turned to her and considered for a moment before answering softly, "I know how late you stayed up reading last night because I could hear you turning the pages of your book."
She blushed. "Oh. Oh... I'm so sorry. I'll I can cast a Silencing Charm..."
"Please don't" he interrupted. "I mean, not on my account. Obviously if you want your privacy, but... " He cautioned a glance at her to see her reaction.
"I guess the last thing you need is total silence," she finished for him quietly.
A shy smile played the corners of her mouth as she pondered something.
"What?" he asked.
"Well, I suppose I'm even more flattered now that you liked my cooking."
Sirius exhaled a chuckle. "Hermione, love, you can't possibly know. I thought I'd never enjoy a cooked meal again."
Her eyebrows shot up. "I take it Ginny's gotten no better in the kitchen then? It's a wonder you haven't wasted away completely... "
"Oh, so it's not just me Harry seems to like her cooking just fine, and I couldn't understand it."
Hermione laughed. "Harry has been charming the food she gives him for years. George taught him how to do it. He never had the heart to tell her he didn't like her cooking."
When their laughter died down, Sirius tilted his head toward her. "You charmed these, didn't you?" he asked and touched the glasses on his face.
She gave a small smile and nodded once.
He shook his head and hauled himself off the bench, muttering something about giving Lily a run for her money before turning to Hermione with his hand extended. Once she stood up, he gave it a quick squeeze.
"Thank you," he said softly and strode back into the house.
~oOo~
Hermione paused in front of the building, glancing down at the scrap of parchment with their address written in Sirius' scrawl. She ascended the concrete steps and pressed the small silver button next to their flat number. Harry's voice crackled over the tiny speaker.
"Hello?"
"Harry, it's Hermione," she said into the metal panel. A second later she heard the buzz of the door permitting her access.
When she reached the second floor, their door was already open, and he was leaning against the frame waiting for her. Her stomach gave an unpleasant lurch at the conflicting emotions that hit her; gods how she missed her friend, and the smile that started pulling at the corners of his mouth made her heart ache slightly. But she also felt horribly betrayed and let down. He stood there, a personification of everything she'd missed for the past three years, and everything she'd fervently hoped and wished she could find again. But she knew that was a delusion. Everything had changed, long before now. She could have walked away with her own feelings protected, but now apparently the same sort of cruel detachment was being extended to Sirius as well. Anger flared in her again as she neared the famous wizard.
Harry's smile widened as she got closer. "Hermi--"
He was abruptly cut off by the sting of her hand against his cheek.
"OW! What the--"
"How could you, Harry?" Hermione's voice wavered but was low and fierce.
Realization dawned prematurely on his face. "Oh, Merlin, Hermione, I'm so sorry everything was so rushed and I didn't have any way to reach you. You can stay the night here if you like..."
She frowned and shook her head. "What? You think this is about lodging? He's your godfather -- you're the only family he has, and you just left him there in his condition without even a wand? I didn't think you could be that cold."
Harry flushed angrily. "Cold? He's the one who tossed me out, Hermione. Three months and not a single effort on his part to even try to live. He's done nothing but wallow and sulk and drink that whole time. You have no idea what it's been like... "
"I have no idea? Did you ever once stop to think there might be a reason he wasn't getting out? Did you ever even bother to ask him?" Hermione's voice raised in pitch and volume but she was cut off as she caught a movement out of the corner of her eye and whipped her wand out, disarming Ginny from whatever she was about to attempt.
"Hey! No wands, you two!" Harry snarled. Hermione smirked and sheathed hers in her belt.
Ginny came to the door, her face matching her red hair and her lips curled in a sneer. "What do you care what happens to Sirius, Hermione? His life meant less to you than your precious house-elf rights, after all. Now you dare come here and criticize us for getting away from Mister Bitterness?"
Hermione stopped, her mouth agape in confusion. "What?" she asked, incredulous.
Harry merely pressed his lips together and shrugged.
Ginny continued, her mouth curving smugly. "Oh, I believe the way you put it was something like, 'Sirius was horrible to Kreacher and ultimately paid for his poor treatment of house-elves,' like he deserved death for being unkind to the little wart who betrayed him."
The breath left her chest for a moment as she recalled the conversation to which Ginny was referring. She, Ron, and Harry had pieced together where the real locket had been in their hunt for Horcruxes. In trying to appeal to Kreacher, they had found some insight into the psychology of house-elves, specifically that their behaviour was strongly based in emotional loyalty towards their families, particularly those who treated them best.
Sirius was horrible to Kreacher, Harry, and it's no good looking like that, you know it's true. Kreacher had been alone for such a long time when Sirius came to live here, and he was probably starving for a bit of affection. I'm sure 'Miss Cissy' and 'Miss Bella' were perfectly lovely to Kreacher when he turned up, so he did them a favor and told them everything they wanted to know. I've said all along that wizards would pay for how they treat house-elves. Well, Voldemort did... and so did Sirius. That was what she had told Harry years... years ago. And somehow it translated into this twisted accusation and yet another black mark against her?
Her wide eyes darted from Ginny's smug face to Harry, who was now looking down at the dingy hallway floor.
"Is that what you honestly think, Harry?" Hermione whispered, appalled. "That I felt Sirius deserved to die because he was mean to Kreacher?" She cleared her throat as horror turned to anger. "Sirius also 'paid for' being a so-called blood-traitor to a family of lunatics. Did he deserve that? Harry, did he 'deserve' Azkaban did your parents 'deserve' to be murdered, because they ultimately paid for underestimating Pettigrew and not keeping him closer to their fold?"
Harry was looking at her now, his face filled with shame. He opened his mouth but nothing came out.
Hermione shook her head. "I suppose I shouldn't be surprised. I mean, I'm already the Wicked Witch of the West for dumping Ron and then letting him die in my arms. But you've been holding on to this for five years? And you call Sirius bitter? At least he has a reason to be."
She took one last look at the Potter couple Ginny's face was frozen at the mention of her deceased brother, and Harry's face was a mask of shame and anguish. Neither spoke.
Her tone was ice cold now. "What do I care what happens to Sirius, indeed. Well maybe you should ask yourselves why cold, heartless Hermione gives more of a damn than you two obviously do."
With that, she spun on her heel and strode out of the building.
She was grateful for the ability to Apparate back to Grimmauld Place because as it was, by the time she reached the doorstep of number twelve, the tears were already streaming down her face. She took a deep breath, opened the door as quietly as possible, and made her way to her bedroom, pushing the door shut before collapsing onto the large bed and curling up for a good cry.
~oOo~
Sirius heard the front door open and close, the soft steps up to the second floor, and then the sound of the larger bedroom door opening and closing. He figured Hermione would head down to the kitchen after a bit, so he decided to put some water on for tea. He was stopped, however, by the stifled little gasps and sniffles that he recognized as crying. Without a second thought, he ascended the staircase, stopping outside her door.
He gave a soft rap and called in, "Hermione?"
When she didn't answer, he continued. "I'm coming in unless you tell me not to."
At her silence, he slowly opened the door to see the back of the brunette witch curled on the large bed. The mattress sank slightly beneath his weight as he sat on the edge and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder.
"Hey, do you want to tell me about it?"
Hermione turned to him, and a fresh set of tears sprang to her puffy red eyes. "Sirius... how much did Harry tell you about what happened with Kreacher?"
Sirius was completely taken aback. He vaguely remembered Hermione's stint with house-elf rights when she was in her fifth year. Was that what had her in such a state now?
"Err..." He searched mentally. "He mentioned something about him playing a role in the final war..."
"He didn't tell you that it was Kreacher who betrayed you, that he implied you'd gone to the Ministry that night, convincing Harry to go after you?"
Sirius' eyebrows shot up and he paused thoughtfully for a moment. "Well I suppose I might have asked for that. Should never have underestimated the little--" He cut himself off, clearing his throat.
Hermione frowned. "Don't say that. You didn't deserve to go through what you did."
"Perhaps not, Hermione, but I was the one who was so wrapped up in my own bitter memories of this place that I gleefully took it out on Mother's house-elf. We never did get along he was brainwashed by my family to be just as blood-obsessed as the rest of them. But you know what they say about keeping one's enemies close." He eyed her curiously, absently wiping a tear from her cheek with his thumb. "That's not what this is all about, is it?"
She sniffled and shook her head.
"Things didn't go so well with Harry, I take it?" he asked softly. He'd suspected something had happened to their friendship over the years; Harry hadn't said more than two words about Hermione in the time Sirius had returned, and Hermione hadn't been in any huge rush to go see him when she'd gotten back from the States.
"Everything is so different now," she whispered. "Ever since Ron died... " She closed her eyes as more tears trickled out. She took a deep breath and shook her head again. "We had broken up just a month before."
Sirius rubbed her back. "I'm so sorry, Hermione."
She attempted a weak smile and failed as everything started pushing forward in her head. "They all thought it was because I never forgave him for leaving Harry and me when we were on the run. Apparently that's what Ron told everyone. He was so angry with me he was going to propose and I ruined it." She looked down at her hands. "Everyone was furious."
He interrupted her, frowning. "He left you and Harry? When did this happen?"
She told him the brief story of their hunt for Horcruxes, explaining the toll the locket had taken on the three, and Ron's impulsive departure and inability to find his way back to them for weeks. "That wasn't why, though, not really. Although I suppose it was an indication of why we weren't meant for each other. I just, I didn't love him, not in that way. After the war was over, I kept seeing how Harry and Ginny were together they were so in love, and even Ron's mum and dad. And I realized that we didn't have that. Everyone expected us to be together, and it felt like that was the only reason we were."
"Do you think Ron felt differently?" Sirius asked.
"Oh, I know he saw it the same way. I just didn't know for certain until... " Hermione swallowed.
She took a shuddering breath. "The day Ron died, he had asked to meet me for lunch. We were in downtown London, and he told me he was in love with someone else, really in love, and that he wanted my blessing before he announced it to everyone.
"He had the engagement ring he'd bought for me and was going to trade it in. It was all so quick, but he was crazy about the girl; I could see it on his face. I'd never seen him like that before, over me or anyone else. He was going to go to a Muggle jeweler, because he wanted to keep it a secret, and of course everyone in the wizarding community knew who he was. I helped him make sure he had the right amount of money and everything." She grimaced at the memory and whispered, "I should have gone with him..."
"It wasn't a very nice part of town," Hermione continued, "but being an Auror, Ron thought he'd be fine. I was three blocks away when I heard the sirens. It was an armed robbery. I I think the thieves were confused when Ron pulled a 'stick' on them, and they they shot him. Several times."
"Oh, Hermione," Sirius whispered, pulling her into his arms.
"I couldn't do anything, Sirius. For all of my Healer's training, for all the magic in the world, I couldn't stop it. His blood was everywhere, and all I could think of was that there were bullets in him, and how do I fix this? They don't train you for bullet wounds in the wizarding world. Trying to remove them would have killed him, and leaving them in would have done the same, and he he died there, in my arms." She was sobbing freely now. "He had so much ahead of him, and I couldn't stop it. I couldn't save him, Sirius."
"Shhhh, it's alright, love," Sirius cooed as he held her close. "It wasn't your fault, you know that, right?"
After several moments, she calmed down enough to pull away. Wiping the mass of curls and tears from her face, she sniffled and looked up. She inhaled and hiccuped slightly. "Sorry I, I haven't spoken about it, well, ever really."
"That's why you left, isn't it?"
She nodded and her lips curved bitterly. "Molly would have had my Healer's license if she could. I actually tried to turn it in myself. Adolphus, my mentor, wouldn't have it, though. He was the one who recommended the exchange program to me. Getting away for a while seemed like the best option.
"They'll never forgive me, though," she said softly. "I was even barred from the funeral. And poor Susan Bones... "
"Do you forgive you?" Sirius asked pointedly.
"Sure," Hermione replied uncertainly, after a moment of considering. "Aside from just getting away, the big lure to America was the Muggle medicine program. The official St. Mungo's report was that there was nothing that could have been done to save Ron, but--" She gave an unimpressed sigh. "Our practices are a little archaic in all areas, if you ask me. I had to know for certain. Not just for my conscience but because this could happen to anyone. Being magical doesn't make us invincible.
"I know for certain now that in Ron's case there hadn't really been a chance of survival. But in places like America, Canada, Japan, and Switzerland, there are more advanced treatments that incorporate magical and Muggle medicine. Even if Ron's wounds had been less critical, it's likely he still would have died under the care of our medical system." She grimaced in anguish at the thought.
"Hermione, I can't believe Harry would hold this against you. Molly Weasley is a bit daft, and she's lost too many children, so I'm not surprised about her. But whatever has happened, Harry still cares for you," Sirius insisted.
"Maybe, Sirius, but people change. Everything is so different now... "
"You're telling me," he said, his eyebrows slightly raised.
She blushed. "I guess you would know better than anyone, and here I've been blubbering at you."
He smiled warmly. "Any time, love."
Just then the grandfather clock in the hallway chimed the nine o'clock hour and Hermione's eyes widened. "Merlin! We're late!"
She jumped up from the bed and pulled Sirius with her. "Come on!" she exclaimed, tugging him down the stairs in a mad rush.
"Where are we going at this hour?" he asked, chuckling.
She turned to him as she pulled open the front door. Quirking an eyebrow at him, she grabbed his muscled arm once they were on the stoop. "You'll see."
She was counting on the rush to be like ripping off a band-aid, giving him no time to hesitate or argue. As she turned, pulling him with her in a side-along Apparition, she was successful.
~oOo~
Diagon Alley was dark and nearly deserted, the majority of shops having closed hours earlier. Two figures appeared suddenly outside of a very old structure. The taller of the two, a male, stumbled slightly and cursed. "Couldn't you have warned me, at least?"
The slighter, feminine figure with a mane of wild curls whispered in reply, "Sorry, there wasn't time."
The man looked around them. "Is this Diagon Alley? Great Merlin, it's been... "
He was interrupted by the rapping of the witch's knuckles on the old wooden door before them. After a brief moment, the door swung open and a familiar young blonde witch stood in the dim light of the shop, a soft smile on her lips.
"Hello, Hermione, Sirius." Her voice had a dreamy lilt to it as she ushered them in.
"Thank you so much for doing this, Luna." Hermione smiled, setting her bag on the floor next to a rickety wooden stool.
Sirius took in his surroundings. It had been decades since he'd last been in the old wandmaker's shop, yet he remembered the day with uncanny clarity. The only thing that was different was the person behind the counter. He gave her a confused frown.
"Lovegood, isn't it? I thought you worked at the Ministry... "
Her eyebrows shot up. "Oh, not technically," she replied brightly, "but we don't talk about that."
Luna turned to the shelves stacked to the ceiling with long narrow boxes and started pulling several down while chatting animatedly over her shoulder. "Now, of course I know why you're here Mr. Ollivander was sorry he couldn't make it, naturally, but he only works in the shop part time anymore. I've been assisting and apprenticing with him since the war ended, you know. We were both expecting you much sooner than this, Sirius, so when Hermione stopped by this afternoon and explained your predicament, of course I agreed to meet you here after hours."
She paused and looked at him sincerely. "I can't say I'm surprised that a house so old would have such clever narguls, sealing the entrances until after dark like that. Harry was probably only fending them off just enough to get himself out during the day. They're not easy to rid completely, but without a wand of course, it would be hopeless." Luna glanced at Hermione and smiled. "I'm sure Hermione knows how to eradicate them, but if you continue to have problems, let me know... "
As she turned to select several more wands, Sirius gave Hermione a mystified look and mouthed, 'Narguls?' To which she simply shrugged and shook her head. He felt a little pull in his heart that the brunette witch had kept his actual 'predicament' a secret.
"Okay, let's give these few a try, shall we?" Luna smiled at Sirius.
It took all of six attempts before the wand found its rightful owner. The delighted grin on Sirius' face as that familiar warmth spread through him when he picked it up was nothing to the joyful laughter that broke from him when he swished the wand and a shower of dazzling white and gold sparks shot out. He turned to Hermione and impulsively lifted her into a bear hug, swinging her around as his laughter infected her. When he set her back down, his arms lingered around her waist and his eyes danced over her prettily flushed features.
"Thank you, Hermione," he murmured, his voice warm and thick with feeling. Reaching up to brush an errant curl from her face, he opened his mouth as if to say something more, then closed it, shaking his head with a strange smile. "Thanks," he whispered again before turning to Luna to pay for his new wand.
Hermione watched with wonder as they made their way through the darkened streets of Diagon Alley. She remembered well enough when Harry's wand got broken, and then when she had been without her own wand, how bereft she'd felt. And yet she was still amazed at the difference that one enchanted stick of wood made to a witch or wizard's sense of self and well-being. It was like a missing piece had clicked into place with Sirius.
He twirled the thirteen and a half inch length of mahogany between his fingers, whistling a soft and vaguely familiar tune to himself. With his arm crooked through hers, they meandered down the uneven street at his request, stopping in front of darkened shop windows to peer in at the dimly lit displays. She felt a pang, suddenly wanting very badly to see Sirius taking in the world in full daylight. So many little things seemed to enchant him; it was like watching a child at Christmastime. His appreciation for everything was infectious and inspiring... Again, she felt her chest twist slightly at the thought of such a bright spirit being shuttered away for more than half his life. She made a silent vow then and there to do whatever she could to right things.
Hermione hadn't realized they had a destination until they reached a very small shop on a narrow corner that was open and lit from within. The sign above the doorway was battered, yet newer than some, and read, "Cappy's." Peering into the dirty glass windows, she saw it was something akin to a wizarding package and convenience shop. Sirius slipped his new sunglasses on and gave her a mischievous grin, jerking his head to the door. "D'you mind?" he asked.
"Oh! No, of course not. Actually, I meant to pick up a few things for cooking earlier," she replied, slipping in after him and heading toward the wine shelf.
Sirius paid for his three bottles of firewhiskey as well as the wines Hermione picked out. Like a child pushing the buttons for a lift, he delighted in shrinking the large sack of alcohol down to a lightweight and manageable size before they left.
When they returned to the doorstep of Grimmauld Place, Sirius laid a hand on Hermione's arm, stopping her. He held out his hand in front of him, closed, facing up as if he held something. When he extended his long fingers they revealed a small, smooth grey stone resting in the center of his palm. Hermione's eyes met his questioningly, and he merely flicked his gaze back to the stone, indicating she should do the same. With a very small wave of his wand, the stone transfigured into a miniature lotus blossom, pale, satin-like, and perfect in the faint moonlight. He held it out to her, his lips curling upwards at the corners as she cupped it gingerly in her small hands.
"Thank you. It's beautiful, Sirius," she said softly, her voice tinged with awe.
"It never gets old, does it? Magic, I mean," he spoke, admiring the innocent pleasure that lit her face as she shook her head in reply. "Thank you for giving that back to me," he said simply, turning and opening the door to the old house.
~oOo~
The small, white flower sat in its new place of esteem on the nightstand by Hermione's bed. She absently shifted her bare legs under the cool softness of her new sheets while filling the notebook in her lap with details and lists. Tomorrow she would go to the Muggle library downtown and use the computers to email her American colleague. She would have to convince Sirius to let her run some diagnostic scans of her own on him, and then she could start fleshing out the theories that were bouncing around in her head.
Just as she was capping her ink bottle for the night, she heard it again. She bit her lip and, with a grimace, slid out of bed, wand in hand, and crept up to the fourth floor. Her movements were swift with familiarity this time as her wand cast a faint glow, just enough light for her to see by. She silently moved Sirius' wand out of reach as a precautionary measure, and noticed the tumbler and nearly empty firewhiskey bottle on his nightstand. Hermione frowned and made a mental note to herself about it before easing her weight onto the bed next to the thrashing wizard.
She fought back a gasp as a ragged cry escaped his lips. With cool, sure fingers she gently brushed the hair from his brow, mimicking her movements from the night before.
"Shhhh ... Sirius, it's alright. I'm here ... " she whispered, hoping once more to ease him without waking him.
Her movements were halted by an iron-like grip on her wrist, his other hand swiftly reaching up and wrapping itself in her hair. She froze, her eyes wide, but he didn't awaken. She could see the rapid movement of his eyes behind their lids. His mouth quivered and his jaw clenched briefly before he inhaled deeply, nostrils flaring slightly. Then, very suddenly, his frame relaxed while his hands pulled her close, forcing her down to lay with him. An almost imperceptible whisper escaped his lips. "Angel..."
His fingers released their grip in her hair, drifting down her back and resting on her hip. His other hand loosened its hold on her wrist and fell to his chest, where the rise and fall evened out with his breathing. Hermione took a deep, silent breath and gazed up at Sirius' face, still slumbering, now slack with relief.
She could justify her actions easily enough, but she couldn't completely deny the part of her that freely drank in the sight of him now. He was beyond handsome; the wizard laying next to her was... beautiful. This wasn't the rather failed paternal figure from her childhood; no, this Sirius was like some kind of tragic angel himself, dark, pale, and perfect.
She softly traced the frame of his face with the backs of her fingers. His raven black hair curled slightly against her hand, softer than any man's hair should be. She wondered absently, as her fingers reached the coarser hair at his jawline, if now that he had his wand he would keep the beard.
Sirius' eyes fluttered open but he didn't move, and neither did Hermione. They stared silently at each other, coffee coloured eyes meeting those the colour of smoke. He blinked slowly but she remained. His exhausted brows barely crinkled, and he licked his lips before whispering hoarsely, "I didn't want you to see me like this."
"It's too late for that," she whispered in reply. "Now sleep."
His eyelids drooped heavily as her fingers continued their sweet, relaxing paths. "We'll talk tomorrow," he murmured as he drifted off, his hand still wrapped comfortably around her waist.
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Latest 25 Reviews for The Light at the End
10 Reviews | 8.0/10 Average
Love this story, your writing is amazing, the story line is interesting and the main characters are very real and accurate (acording to me ;)). I hope you'll update this story soon again!
I am extremely interested in finding out what Sirius went through while he was on the other side of the Veil! Hopefully you won't keep us in suspense for too long... Also, since Sirius and Remus used to be close friends, I get the impression that Sirius has kept him at bay; I'm looking forward to learning more about that as well. Keep up the good work!
Well, the way to a man's heart leads through his stomach...
This is a gem you got growing here. Hope you plan to update soon.
This was good!I was wondering what happened to Ron.Thats sad how he died.I would love to be the one getting to sleep beside sirus,way to go Hermione for sticking by him and helping him,I think there will be a great love there.
I love this story!I usely just read Severus/Hermione,but I also love Sirus too!It's just really hard to find a good Sirus story.This is great keep up the good work.
Very realistic characters =)
Can't wait for the next chapter!!!
I am so thrilled that you've come back to this story! I re-read Chapter 1 before starting this one just to re-familiarize myself with what went on before, and I'm glad that more mysteries are being revealed. So in this timeline, Ron is dead and Sirius is back--what about other characters from the JKR canon? Remus, Tonks, etc? Are they still dead in your story, or will we see one or more of them as well?
I hope that Sirius will be able to kick his drinking habit; he really doesn't need the liquor to dull the pain of everything anymore, but the physical symptoms of addiction will be tough to overcome. Fortunately he has a Healer living with him! Hermione can be a tough taskmaster, though; especially when it's for someone's own good. But it's proof that someone gives a damn about him, so in a way it should be good for Sirius' self-esteem.
Next chapter, please!
I absolutely love this story, you have such a good grasp on how out of place Sirius feels. Very well done, I look forward to read more.
This is well-written. Lovely style. I look forward to the rest.