Suprises.
Chapter 3 of 6
Ophelia ImmortalDuring her stay at a B&B, Hermione remembers the day she started her journey. A series of events take place, ending with a mysterious gift left on her bed...
Surprises.
"When good people in any country cease their vigilance and struggle, then Evil will prevail."
Pearl S. Buck
She awoke in a dark room and found herself naked, tied to a bed and gagged with a black silk sash; she was all alone. She heard a voice she couldn't recognize at first, and a black clad figure emerged from the shadows. He took off his cloak, long blond hair almost glowing in the darkness, identity unmistakeable: Lucius Malfoy.
He approached her with an animalistic growl. Then, climbing onto the bed and straddling her, he pulled out a long silver knife and pressed the blade to her collarbone, piercing her flesh. She struggled desperately against her bindings, but to no avail. Warm blood was trickling down to her breasts, which he lapped up with his tongue, biting and breaking her skin. Parting her thighs, he brutally thrust into her.
Blood, pain, screams, and then darkness.
Hermione Granger woke up screaming.
"Hermione, you alright?" She heard a worried voice behind her door.
"Yes, I'm fine Harry... Just a nightmare."
"You sure?"
"Yeah, I'm alright, don't worry. Go back to sleep."
"As long as you're sure...'Night."
"Good night."
Looking at the little clock on her bedside table, she saw it was three in the morning. She groaned and headed towards the little table in the middle of the room to pour herself a glass of water. She sipped it slowly and started to walk towards the window.
Just a nightmare, she thought. The same I have been having for two weeks, ever since I met him... She had been haunted for days with thought of what he could have done to her.
Gazing out of the window, she watched the moon appear from behind the clouds. They had found this B&B by chance the day before, not knowing where else they could stay. It had been a month since they had been on the move. Not telling anyone in the Order their plan, the three adolescents had decided to abandon their last year of schooling, as going back to Hogwarts after Dumbledore's death and Snape's betrayal would have been too hard. Of course they weren't even sure it would be open that year. Harry, Ron and Hermione had left the Burrow the day after Bill and Fleur's wedding. She had left Crookshanks with Ginny, knowing the cat would be nothing more than a hindrance to their movements. They had been Apparating all over the Britain, searching for Horcruxes, working for money, and waiting for news concerning the activities of Voldemort and his Death Eaters now that their main adversary, Albus Dumbledore, had been eliminated.
Hermione found her room most distasteful, as it reminded her very much of Dolores Umbridge's office when she had been at Hogwarts. The walls were pink, there were lacy doilies on all the furniture, dried flowers in vases, and little statuettes of kittens playing littered over almost every available surface. Fortunately there aren't any of those ghastly ornamental plates...or technicolor kittens! Honestly, who could be so sick and without any aesthetic sense whatsoever as to make them?
She decided to get one of her books and read until sleep overtook her. Sighing, she walked over to her bag and took out a cardboard box. Taking the box with her, she sat on the bed and emptied the contents onto the bedspread. The box contained at least fifty books, all shrunken down to the size of postage stamps. Picking one of them up, she placed it besides her and put the others back in the box, closing the lid.
"Engorgio," she whispered, pointing her wand at the book, which instantly regained its original size.
"What would I do without magic?" she smiled. She had bought all the textbooks they would have used during their final year at school, not wanting their, and most importantly her, education to be incomplete. And obviously, she had bought many other books she thought would be useful in preparing for the difficult tasks that awaited her and her friends.
Opening the enormous book, she started whizzing through the pages. Even Hermione agreed the tome was not exactly bedtime reading, however they needed to know how to withstand dangerous creatures such as giants and Inferi. From what the volume said, Inferi could be repelled with fire, but she had not yet found a way of completely destroying them. Whilst she tried to find something useful to fit her purpose, she could not help thinking back to the first day of their departure...
The first place they had stopped off at was the Dursleys', and though it had not been the most cordial of visits, in its own way it had been an eye-opener.
She had insisted they telephoned the Muggles beforehand, thinking it to be rude to turn up unexpected, and had agreed to meet half an hour later at Number 4 Privet Drive. What the Dursleys had obviously not been expecting was for them to Apparate into their hallway. Consequently, the trio's arrival was met with screams from Aunt Petunia and Dudley and the beetroot-red face of Uncle Vernon.
When their respective cries of fear and shouts of anger had subsided, they were left with a very uncomfortable, but welcome, silence. Harry explained all that had occurred in the wizarding world in the past year, including the death of his former Headmaster. Ron took the opportunity to look at all the strange Muggle things dotted around the Dursleys' living room, pointing and asking questions, causing Hermione to hiss at him to shut up. Hermione had to admit she felt quite uncomfortable with Dudley staring at her as if he had never seen a girl before. In trying to avoid the boy's uncomfortable gaze, she noticed that Mrs Dursley appeared to be scrutinising Ron's tatty second-hand clothes with narrowed eyes. Looking over to her friend, she realised that the woman was actually glaring at the dirt he had on his nose. Hermione quickly took out her wand and performed 'Scourgify' on him.
"Honestly, Ron, it looks as if you find personal hygiene a foreign concept."
"I don't see what the problem is."
It wasn't until she turned to see the Dursleys' faces that she realised her mistake. Damn... I keep forgetting these people hate magic. Hate magic was a bit of an understatement, seeing as they were looking at her as though she had just admitted to being a leper.
"She did magic!"
"Well, yes, Uncle Vernon. That's what you do if you're a witch."
"But you can't do magic outside of that school!"
"We're of age now. We can do magic almost anywhere now. Anyway, as I was trying to explain, we are not going back to Hogwarts this year. There may not even be a school to go back to. Look, right now Voldemort..." He shot a look at Ron, who had flinched. "... is at war with most of the wizarding community. He and his followers find it amusing to torture and murder Muggles, that means normal people, like you."
The Dursleys looked at him with a mixture of shock and terror on their faces.
"B-but why would those nutters come here?"
"Why not? It doesn't really matter who you are; being Muggles, you should be purged from the world," he said with distaste. "And you're also related to me, so they could try to use you as bait."
"That is preposterous!" Mr. Dursley cried, jumping to his feet. "You were forced upon us! We want nothing to do with you! We..."
"Are in danger." Harry interrupted heatedly. "Listen to me, it's fairly simple. If you stay here, you will die."
"I can defend my own family!"
"Uncle Vernon, you remember how you coped with Hagrid years ago? And he was harmless."
The large man reddened at the thought, his moustache quivering.
Aunt Petunia finally seemed to have found her voice "But where could we go? We can't just leave."
"That is precisely what you must do."
"Must, boy?"
"If you are captured, I can't save you." Harry said quietly.
"Vernon," Mrs. Dursley said urgently, "maybe we should listen to him."
"Yes, Dad. What if he's right?" Dudley asked, terrified at the thought.
"Quiet, everyone! I need to think!" he shouted, before starting to pace around the crowded room. "You say that we are in danger if we stay in this house. In our house."
"Yes," the boy confirmed.
"And how can we be any safer out there? I have people to protect, boy!"
"If you want to protect them, then you had better go!" Harry said, starting to loose his calm.
"We can't just leave! What of our affairs? My job? Dudley's schooling?"
"I can't believe you're thinking about that now! Don't you realise what 'war' means?!"
"Don't you dare use that tone with me!"
Harry was about to reply when Ron nudged him, which was enough to bring him back to his senses. After exhaling slowly, he tried once more "Uncle Vernon, please, listen to me. I know you've never liked me, and you probably never will, but please trust me at least this once. Pack your bags, just the indispensable items," he added, looking at his cousin, "and go to Ms. Figg's..."
"Ms. Figg? Why should we go to her?!" He stopped abruptly as comprehension dawned on his face, his beady eyes widening. "She's not one of... one of you, is she?!"
"Well, not exactly. I mean she can't do magic, but she is a witch."
"And all those years we sent you there!" he exclaimed in horror.
"I only found out recently. What does it matter now? Just go to her and tell her I sent you. You can leave letters for anyone who may worry about your absence, saying that you're going on a long holiday. The others will make sure you'll find a comfortable place; they'll help you find a job and everything. That should be it." Turning to his two friends on the settee. "Shall we?"
"Ready when you are, mate," Ron said.
"Erm, it was a pleasure to meet you." Hermione said, nodding to the Dursleys.
"Goodbye then. Have a good life." The three Muggles just stood staring at their retreating backs as they walked to the front door.
"Harry, don't you want to say anything else?" the brunette asked worriedly.
"What's the point, Hermione? There's no love lost between us. And if they do as I've asked, they'll have their memories modified: they won't remember anything at all."
No sooner had they shut the door behind them that a loud scuffling could be heard, along with a loud voice barking instructions such as "... not that one, Petunia! You can't fit a thing in that! The big one! The big one!"
"Something tells me they're going to follow your advice." Ron smiled.
From Privet Drive, they had gone to Godric's Hollow to visit the tomb of Harry's parents.
What remained of the Potter's cottage had been in ruins and covered by a thick coat of ivy. The three of them walked through the silent village until they reached the churchyard and continued through the rows of graves, searching for that one name. After a while, they found a great oak tree; amidst its roots were two white lilies and a single, small, marble tombstone that read:
James Potter, born 27 March 1960, died 31 October 1981
Lily Potter, born 30 January 1960, died 31 October 1981
The last enemy that shall be destroyed is death.
Apparently, someone had charmed the tombstone so neither enemies nor unknowing Muggles couldn't desecrate it and the flowers would remain forever in bloom.
Hermione looked up to see tears glistening in her friend's emerald eyes, and tugging on Ron's sleeve, they left him alone with his thoughts and memories. They sat waiting for him at the gates, sombre and in silence, until he joined them, his whole being aflame, as if animated with some newfound purpose. Hermione realised then that he would do all that he could to see the end of his nemesis, though she could not tell if it would be for salvation or revenge.
Poor Harry. He is too young to have to face such a task, she thought as her eyes closed and sleep enveloped her.
She awoke at seven, and after getting washed and dressed, she walked down to the breakfast room, sitting down at the table reserved for her and her friends. The Housekeeper came bustling in and asked her what she wanted. Having ordered a pot of tea and a cooked breakfast, she sat looking around the room, noticing with displeasure that this too was done in a style reminiscent of Umbridge.
As she was presented with her breakfast and wondering just how long she should wait before waking up the boys, a paper boy came bounding in, announcing the story of the century. The Housekeeper came hurrying into the room, yelling at the small boy for disturbing her guests.
"I'm sorry, Ms., but the paper..."
"It is not civil to come barging in here like a barbarian!"
"But the headline..." he insisted, waving it in front of her nose.
"What? What's the headline?"
Thrusting one of the papers in her hand, he turned to look at her with a satisfied grin as she began reading excitedly. "How could it have happened?"
"'Dunno... But what is for certain, that ain't no heart attack!"
His purpose achieved, he started walking out of the room. As he passed her table, Hermione called to him. "I don't suppose I could have a paper too?"
"If you gimme a quid you can."
Taking her purse out of her pocket, she handed him a pound in return for the paper and another one as a tip. His eyes lit up. She just winked at him.
"Thank you, miss!" he said, before running out the room in search of more customers.
Hermione smiled and, taking a sip of her tea, opened her paper only to choke as soon as she saw the headline.
PM DEAD IN OFFICE
CAUSE YET UNKNOWN
PAGAN HOLOGRAM OVERHEAD
The Muggle community seemed to have mistaken the symbol for something satanic; but no witch or wizard could possibly do the same. Over the rooftops floated the eerie image of a green skull with a snake coming out of its mouth: the Dark Mark.
She ran upstairs and knocked violently on the boys' door.
"Harry! Ron!"
"I'm coming, I'm coming," came a grumpy voice from the other side of the door. As soon as it opened, she bound inside.
"Hermione, what's up?" a worried Ron asked from behind her.
Whipping her wand out, she just pointed it behind her and set a silencing charm on the door
"Hey, be careful where you point that thing!"
"Shut up, Ron!"
"What is happening here?" Harry asked, coming out of the bathroom.
"Harry, Ron! They've done it!"
"What?"
Loosing all patience, she threw the paper at Harry who took one quick look and paled instantly. Ron, who had walked up behind him so he could read over his shoulder, looked up incredulously. "This means..."
"Yes, this is now open war. There shall be proper battles next." Hermione answered with a small voice.
"What are we going to do?" Harry asked, looking at the floor.
"You mean, are we going to return to HQ?"
He nodded.
"Well... that is really up to you, Harry." He looked at her.
"Hermione's right, Harry. We'll following you whatever you decide."
"I need to think. You need to think. I can't decide for everyone."
"But..."
"No, Ron! Do not place your lives in my hands!"
"Look you two, go and have some breakfast, and then come back up so we can discuss it, ok?"
"Yeah... Alright." Filing silently out of the room, the boys headed down the stairs whilst Hermione went to her own room.
While Muggles would remain mystified at the sudden death of their Prime Minister, wizards would know at once who and why it had been done. And this would only make them more terrified then they already were.
Something had to be done. Finding the missing Horcruxes was the only real chance they had for winning the war, and they had to do so urgently or there was no telling how many would perish. After conquering Britain, it would not be long before Voldemort spread his reign of terror over the rest of the world: none would be spared.
She heard a knock on her door and opened it to find Harry and Ron standing there. Letting them in, she closed the door and conjured two extra chairs for them to sit on. Taking a deep breath, Harry started to talk.
After many hours, they had finally come to an agreement. They would continue their search for the remaining treasures of the Founders of Hogwarts, and if they heard of one more attack, just one more, they would immediately Apparate to HQ and ask for help from the other members of the Order.
It started raining outside so, just for that day, they decided to give it a rest. Hermione read a book on Rowena Ravenclaw, wondering what her treasure could be, while Harry and Ron practiced wordless magic.
Around lunchtime, Harry clapped his hand to his head and started laughing. Fearing that he had suddenly gone mad, the other two looked at him with alarm.
"Honestly, you two! Oh, Hermione, we forgot what day it was today!"
"Come again?"
"Look at the paper," he said, grinning and pointing to the date above the headline.
"The 19th of September," she muttered softly, "It's my birthday..."
"Damn right it is!" Ron said, grinning.
"I'm eighteen!" she chuckled.
"And here's your present!" Harry said, handing her a light-coloured parcel.
Opening it, she gasped: a periwinkle blue silk scarf and gloves came out. "Harry, they're wonderful! Thank you!"
"I thought that colour suited you." He winked.
"And here is my present," Ron said from behind her.
Looking around, she saw that he too was holding a wrapped parcel. She opened it slowly. "Oh, Ron!" There was a pair of silver earrings with little blue orbs hanging underneath, and the orbs seemed to be glowing. "Is that... ?"
"Fairy dust: should bring good luck. Let's see you wearing 'em."
Smiling, she put the earrings in her ears and the scarf around her neck.
"They suit you," Harry commented.
"Yeah, you really look nice," Ron blurted out.
"Oh, thanks!" She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him on the cheek.
"Anytime," he mumbled, his ears turning red.
"Time for lunch... Shall we?"
"Yes, you two go ahead. I'll just put my gifts away."
"Right. See you down there." Closing the door behind them, she crossed to the mirror on her chest of drawers and determined that she did indeed look nice.
Hermione put the scarf and gloves in her bag and the earrings back in their case. She turned around and was about to exit the room when she noticed a flower on her bed. It was a single white rose.
"How beautiful," she murmured, and crossing the room once again, she reached out for the flower. But as soon as her fingers touched the stem, she felt a strange yet familiar feeling of having a hook tug just behind her navel, and she felt wind rushing past her. As soon as it had started, it stopped. Opening her eyes, she found herself in a completely different room. It appeared to be a mansion, of sorts, based on the scale of the chamber and the old-fashioned yet expensive furnishings. The mere size of the place was dumbfounding. Looking around, she noticed a fireplace, flames crackling away, engraved with a serpent.
She had a horrible suspicion she knew where she was, but prayed she was wrong. Her blood chilled when she heard a soft voice behind her, confirming her suspicions. "Happy birthday, Miss Granger."
Author's Note: I just wanted to point out that the timeline is slightly different to Deathly Hallows. Hermione's birthday is on the 19th of September, but I moved the wedding date, instead of just after Harry's Birthday in July, to round about the end of August. Being an Alternate Universe, I have put in some elements that are present in the seventh book, whilst others I have changed. Thanks for reading.
Ophelia
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Latest 25 Reviews for Deliciously So...
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Ophelia-chan! It's Persephone! I found you on here too. Awesome ;D I hope you can start writing again
Prima di tutto, 5 belle stelline a questa storia.Scrivere rape fics non è mai semplice, per il solo fatto che bisogna equilibrare le sensazioni della vittima con quelle del carnefice, e bisogna stare attenti a non glorificare l'atto dello stupro. E tu ci sei riuscita perfettamente, nonostante questa fosse la tua prima storia (e credimi, non è semplice: ho letto le fic di tanti autori alle prime armi [e anche molto più grandi di te] che hanno trattato l'argomento con una superficialità raccapricciante).La cosa che mi è più piaciuta, è stata la scena che ha coinvolto Snape ed Hermione. Di questo capitolo è la mia preferita in assoluto (anche perchè Snape/Hermione è uno dei miei pairings preferiti XD).Comunque, devo ancora una volta congratularmi con te per il modo in cui sei riuscita a mantenere i personaggi IC. A partire da Hermione, e a continuare con Draco, Snape, Lucius e Bellatrix (anche se alcuni di loro non compaiono in questo cap), neppure uno solo di loro ha stonato. Li hai descritti esattamente come la Row ce li ha presentati (se non meglio [anzi, sicuramente meglio]). Tanto per cominciare, gli atteggiamenti e le parole sia di Severus che di Lucius mostrano i personaggi per come sono veramente, senza una sola sbavatura di OOC. Poi, il contesto in cui stanno interagendo non solo è originalissimo, ma anche ben strutturato.Davvero, non so che altro dire (anzi, si, però lo riservo per il prossimo cap :P)Bacioni,la tua coscienza xxx
wow this is an amazing story so far! i cant wait to read more. when are you planning on posting the next chapter?
can't you -just by chance - cut his cock off, please?he has to pay for this. blast this creature.the idea with using he blood to trail her down was good.with what may come Hermine might wish he had finished his curse. Will be interesting to see Snapes reaction on finding his former pupil as his friends toy.
Bene, bene. Ho riletto questo capitolo con gioia, e riflettendoci su più accuratamente, devo ammettere che l'ho trovato attinente a quelle che sono le personalità di Lucius ed Hermione. Lucius ha ancora una volta dato prova della sua natura sadica e contorta, ma allo tesso tempo non ha potuto fare a meno di sfoderare il suo complesso 'narcisistico di onnipotenza.' Non a caso ha voluto che Hermione traesse piacere dalla loro interazione sessuale (per quanto inquietanti le circostanze che hanno portato ad essa siano).Dal canto suo, Hermione non ha potuto far altro che lasciarsi sopraffare dalla propria ingenuità e dal lato oscuro di Malfoy, il quale ha corrotto la sua innocenza in modo oserei dire perverso ed inumano.E' inutile che ti dica che aspetto con ansia il prossimo aggiornamento :)
Prima di tutto tengo a precisare di essere profondamente incazzata... Cioè, un solo commento? Non so se mi spiego. Dio, Franci, il terzo capitolo non solo era stilisticamente più raffinato dei precedenti, ma aveva anche un plot di una tale originalità ed intensità da meritare almeno il quadruplo dei commenti che hai invece ricevuto... Sul serio. La trama di questa storia è estremamente intelligente ed intrigante, e io personalmente non capsico come mai ANCHE QUI la gente sembri non accorgersene.
Vabbè, ma qui si ritorna al discorso trito e ritrito dell'età mentale dei lettori, cosa che credo non sia il caso di riprendere, in caso qui ci sia qualcuno in grado di capire l'italiano :P
A parte questo però, nonostante su questo sito ci siano storie di indubbia qualità, c'è da dire che la maggior parte di esse sono PARECCHIO noiose. Molte sono post-Hogwarts e con trame che seppur ben articolate, distorcono la personalità dei personaggi descritti dalla Row (vediamo per es. un'Hermione che non possiede nemmeno un quarto delle caratteristiche della vera Hermione, o un Piton che pur rimanendo freddo, tutt'a un tratto mi diventa civile e oserei dire 'umano'), e magari è anche per questo che le fic che si sviluppano lungo la direttiva Hogwarts/Voldemort regnante non ricevono l'attenzione e i meriti che meritano (ma che bel gioco di parole).
Anche vero però, è che TPP non è un sito molto frequentato, quindi è molto difficile che possa competere con le recenzioni lasciate su AFF. Però il prestigio che deriva da averci una fic postata non è certo da sottovalutare :)
Mi sono persa in chiacchiere come al solito. Volevo solo dirti che sono fiera di te e del lavoro che stai svolgendo con questa splendida storia. Non mi stancherò mai di ripeterti quanta stoffa ci sia in te. Coltiva le tue capacità fino in fondo, perchè anche se nel tuo cammino incontrerai TANTA gente ignorante che non saprà apprezzarle, troverai anche chi (seppur in minoranza perchè gli uomini intelligenti sono come le mosche bianche) sarà in grado do vedere e riconoscere il tuo infinito talento.
La tua coscienza
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
Cara coscienza,
come al solito i tuoi commenti mi fanno tantissimo piacere, e sono molto felice che tu trovi che io stia migliorando. Come avrai notatato sto cambiando un bel pò rispetto all'originale postato su AFF (dato che, e mi vergogno a dirlo, non usavo proprio il mio cervellino quando scrivevo :p)
Non mi disturba troppo (non ho detto affatto, ne)non ricevere molte reviews, e almeno su questo sito non mi arrivano le solite "Bel capitolo non vedo l'ora del prossimo". Ma almeno i tuoi mi fanno felice. Bah vediamo come va. Almeno sto maturando io, e non può che essere positivo questo.
Tantissimi baci
Franci
p.s. Il capitolo 17 tarderà ancora un pò, sto aspettando di finire di modificare tutti i precedenti capitoli prima di completarlo. Mi spiace per l'attesa :(
Great chapter!! I can't wait to find out what happens next.
Ciao Francesca! E' la tua coscienza che ti parla :PDunque, ora che ho trovato un pò di tempo libero, sono finalmente riuscita a leggere il primo capitolo. Come già sai, i tuoi lavori mi piacciono davvero molto, però c'è una cosa che ho notato, e che credo sarebbe opportuno tu ti soffermassi ad osservare. Esempio: Poor thing. She is quite alluring, it is indeed a pity she is such an abomination, really; I might have even considered a more fulfilling relationship. Merlin, Azkaban must have really lowered my standards. After a beautiful trophy-wife like Narcissa, precious few can be considered her equal, particularly not this lowly female before me… But still, it would be one way of settling matters. The more I think of it the more it seems the perfect retribution: she has humiliated me, it seems only fair to reciprocate.Allora, secondo me i testi risulterebbero più fluidi e decisamente più maturi se invece di descrivere certe scene come pensieri dei personaggi, tu le descrivessi come parte della narrazione.Esempio: Lucius thought she was alluring, but she would have been more desiderable if her blood had been pure.Ovviamente, questo era solo uno stralcio del pezzo che ho citato sopra, ma a mio avviso, orientare la narrazione lungo questa direzione, aumenterebbe notevolmente la qualità formale dei testi.Spero che i miei consigli ti siano d'aiuto per i prossimi capitoli.La tua coscienza.
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
Salve Coscienza :DDa un pò che non ci si sente. Grazie per il consiglio, vedrò cosa posso fare per migliorarmi ancora. Sai che apprezzo moltissimo il tuo parere, e grazie ancora per tutto l'aiuto che mi hai dato, e sopratutto tutte le spinte per portarmi dove sono ora.Con tutto il mio affettoOphelia
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
Salve Coscienza :DDa un pò che non ci si sente. Grazie per il consiglio, vedrò cosa posso fare per migliorarmi ancora. Sai che apprezzo moltissimo il tuo parere, e grazie ancora per tutto l'aiuto che mi hai dato, e sopratutto tutte le spinte per portarmi dove sono ora.Con tutto il mio affettoOphelia
That's our girl, cleaver, resourceful and clear-headed. Lucius didn't have a chance this time...
Hey, I like this chapter. Very well done indeed!you did a great job on showing Hermiones feelings without using to much repetition this time. (found it disturbing last time. sorry)and you draw an interesting picture of all the characters.starts to get more and more interesting.what about ron and harry. are they going to be on stage any more?thank you for the chaptersalva
Someone says Hermione is OOC in this story, and I have to disagree. Even though in the books she's portrayed as a bossy, determined and intelligent girl, this is exactly what she is, that is, just a girl (which means that she's not indestructible). Plus, given the way she was portrayed throughout the 7th book (where she cried on alternative chapters), I don't think Ophelia is describing her OOC. In canon we never had to deal with a 17-years old Hermione Granger who was abducted and raped by a Death Eater, so no one can know how she would have reacted. Moreover, I don't think there's a scheme that illustrates how a woman who's been raped should react, and considering that everyone reacts differently to what happens to them, I really fail to see this OOC-ness people keep talking about. At last, I believe it would be wise to remember that Hermione not only is stubborn and bossy; she's sensible, thoughtful and loyal too, and these are all characteristics that most authors tend to forget or ignore when writing their stories. This is why I appreciate Ophelia's work. She is seeing Hermione as a human being, not as some sort of wonder-woman.
i was really curious about how you would show draco that hermione was at the manor. you did that scene (and every other scene of the story) amazing. and dont listen to anyone who says you are not portraying hermione well. you are showing the human side of her, instead of the perfect warrior princess too often shown by some stories. well done!
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
Thank you for your compliments, as soon as I manage to finish editing the next chapters I can send them to my beta, so please be patient for an update. As to my portrayal of Hermione, I tried to imagine how she would feel. No matter how strong someone is, after a traumatizing expirience such as this one, it would just seem wrong if she could get up and react straight away. I don't know that's my opinion. Anyways, thanks again for the review.
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
Thank you for your compliments, as soon as I manage to finish editing the next chapters I can send them to my beta, so please be patient for an update. As to my portrayal of Hermione, I tried to imagine how she would feel. No matter how strong someone is, after a traumatizing expirience such as this one, it would just seem wrong if she could get up and react straight away. I don't know that's my opinion. Anyways, thanks again for the review.
You have still kept Snape's loyalties ambiguous, he could go either way. Interesting story, I hope Hermione gets a chance for retribution.
What planet does Lucius live on, that he thinks she will ever want him after what he has done. The best he can hope for is that she never gets her hand on her wand when he is within hexing distance!
Fingers crossed, I hope Severus is still on the right side and helps her, and deals to Lucius!
How did Lucius know where to find her?
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
With a tracking spell (I made that one up, I know, but I'm sure somewhere in the Harry Potter Universe it's not impossible). He used her blood to be able to locate her.
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
With a tracking spell (I made that one up, I know, but I'm sure somewhere in the Harry Potter Universe it's not impossible). He used her blood to be able to locate her.
Ha ha , Lucius, serves you right!
Lucius is not as smart as he thinks he is, trying to attack Hermione in public. Even if he hadn't been stopped, there would have been three witnesses to obliviate at least.
Absolutely appaling how you have portraid Lucius. I so want to hex him. Hermione hopefully in yur eyes is made of better stuff than you ahve portraid her. She's not weak. She is a fighter. ahhh. grrrr
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
First of all thanks for reviewing, it gives an author some idea of how their story is for others. Now to you comments:Hopefully appaling is referred to how he acts and not my actual way of portraying him. As for Hermione, though many fics portray her as some form of super-girl, completely unfazed by her surroundings and the situations she lives, I don't think it's too wild a guess to figure she's not. Look at the Harry Potter books, she has difficuly coping with a few situations, as is right for a 17-18 year old girl. She may be a fighter, but can you honestly imagine a rape-victim getting up from the dirt and trying to fight back straight away? It's not weakness it's human. Thanks again
Response from Ophelia Immortal (Author of Deliciously So...)
First of all thanks for reviewing, it gives an author some idea of how their story is for others. Now to you comments:Hopefully appaling is referred to how he acts and not my actual way of portraying him. As for Hermione, though many fics portray her as some form of super-girl, completely unfazed by her surroundings and the situations she lives, I don't think it's too wild a guess to figure she's not. Look at the Harry Potter books, she has difficuly coping with a few situations, as is right for a 17-18 year old girl. She may be a fighter, but can you honestly imagine a rape-victim getting up from the dirt and trying to fight back straight away? It's not weakness it's human. Thanks again
Oh gods, Lucius is really sick! I can't stand him in this. Can't Severus do anything? and Ron and Harry, they haven't got a clue to go by... and Hermione - I really feel for her. How can anyone really think being raped like that that she will sudden'y want Lucius unless he drugs her to do so. This is really sick.
Oh ewe!!!! I want to rip him apart!! If this turns into a rape then she falls for him story, I'll puke.
Oh I loved the use of the dream, backstory and present to give us a full understanding of what's happening! Really good.
Oh, I want to hex him for his mistreatment of Blinky! The little elf was only concerned for him, the horrible prat! It's too bad Hermione has gotten under his thick hide - he's not good enough for her. I hope Hermione knows better to stay away!
Poison is my favorite song!!!! I enjoyed both these chapters, and that makes me enjoy them even more lol :D