Chapter 2 - Chocolate Cake and Light Dinner Conversation

Author's Notes:

Much love and hugs to my fabulous Betas - Strider, Kat, Lea, Darcy, Brandy, Diane, and Sarah. Thank you!!!!

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners,creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

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Chapter 2 - Chocolate Cake and Light Dinner Conversation

Hermione paused a moment before entering the Great Hall. It wouldn't do her any good to not only turn up late, but also out of breath. She smoothed down her hair, straightened her robes and took an extra moment to mentally compose herself. However, the moment she walked through the doors of the Great Hall, all that mental preparation went right down the proverbial toilet.

Gone were the four, long house tables she was so used to seeing in the expansive room. In their place, for the pre-term meals, was a singular, circular table. Seated around the table were a host of teachers Hermione hadn't seen in years.

Diminutive Professor Flitwick was seated next to Professor Sprout. Professor Sinistra, a scar across her cheek proudly displayed as a reminder of the great cost of the war with Voldemort, was chatting with Professor Vector and the ever-irritating Professor Trelawney. There were a few new teachers, interspaced amongst the ones she knew from her schooldays. She noticed that sadly absent was Hagrid's hulking presence. And then she saw him.

As soon as Hermione saw Severus sitting at the table, she simply could go no further. He was very much the same as he had been that day long ago on Spinner's End, yet he was also so completely changed. His perpetual scowl was fixed firmly on his face while Professor Sprout spoke animatedly about something or other. His eyes were still as black as a moonless midnight, somehow seeming both cold and passionate at the same time. His hands were still elegantly long-fingered and were currently wrapped around a mug of something steaming. And, his nose was still somewhat beaklike, and Hermione watched it in fascination as his nostrils flared in distaste as a bit of food Sprout had on her fork went flying off, as she gestured dramatically with her fork in hand, to illustrate a point.

No, all of those features so very Severus Snape, were the same features that she had pressed up against in an alleyway wall seven years earlier. It was those same features that had haunted her during many long nights. But, where those features were almost a source of comforting distraction, the changes she noticed had an entirely different effect.

First, instead of the billowing robes he had worn every moment he was in her presence, during her time at Hogwarts, he was wearing a simple pair of black trousers and crisp, white, linen shirt. The myriad of ebony buttons marching neatly up the front, and securely fastened to his Adam's apple still gave the man an aura of the repressive and overly strict Potions Master that he undoubtedly still was, but, there was something in the loose-fitting sleeves of the shirt that made Hermione think of pirates and cheesy Muggle-romance novels.

Oh, sweet Circe! He'd Avada Kedavra me on the spot if he knew what I was thinking!

His hair was shiny, as if touched by silk. She wondered momentarily if it had always been so, and perhaps she had just assumed, as a young girl, that it had been overly oily. Either way, the length of it was tied back with a simple piece of leather. Hermione was thankful that it wasn't a satin ribbon holding back his hair. She always hated the ponciness of Lucius Malfoy and his hair ribbons. Honestly, it was really difficult to fear a man who obviously spent more time on his hair than she did!

But, it wasn't Severus' neatly tied back hair that shocked her so; it was his appearance of overall health. Oh, certainly his skin was still pale, he obviously still spent far too much time down in the Dungeons, but it had lost its waxy sallowness of her school days. He was still lean, Hermione noticed as she eyed him hungrily through his linen shirt, but his face was not nearly as gaunt as the last time she had seen him, nor his eyes nearly as sunken.

His lips turned up into a sneer at something someone had said. Those lips. She remembered those lips clearer than any other part of his anatomy. She remembered nipping at them gently, running the tip of her tongue along them, ever so slightly, coaxing him into responding. And he had. As much as she had tried to fight her desire for Severus over the years, convincing herself that it was only her foolhardiness in throwing herself at him ... literally and figuratively ... that had put him in such a state of shock that he hadn't cursed her into oblivion. But, those lips had reminded her of a completely different scenario. Those lips had responded, hesitantly at first, but then with such a fierce passion she felt certain it would consume her.

No. I can't do this, Hermione thought as she shook her head back and forth. I can't go in there, sit next to him and pretend like everything's OK. No, no, no...

"Hermione! There you are! We were beginning to worry!" Minerva's voice startled her as Hermione realized the older witch was standing next to her. "Is everything alright? You were shaking your head oddly."

"Oh, I..." Hermione started awkwardly, before regaining her composure. "Everything's fine. I apologize for being late. I lost track of time while settling in."

"Perfectly understandable. Come now, we all ...well, mostly all of us... have been waiting for you to tuck in," Minerva cast a withering glare in Professor Sprout's direction who was sloppily tearing off a piece of chicken from a leg bone, with her teeth.

The two witches crossed the Great Hall and approached the table. The teachers all stood and greeted Hermione, some coming around to shake her hand politely, if not reservedly, except for Severus. Hermione noticed that he stood, out of common courtesy, but only nodded his head slightly in greeting, when she accidentally caught his eye.

Everyone began to reseat themselves, when Hermione realized the only open seat was between Professor Trelawney and Severus. If there is a God, Hermione thought, he is one sick, sadistic bastard.

She considered turning and bolting out of the Great Hall. Maybe I could make it to the gates and Apparate far, far away before anyone has time to react, she thought wistfully. But, instead of entertaining further flights of fancy, she took her seat of doom.

Immediately as Hermione sat down, platters of food appeared on the table. The aroma of roast chicken and rosemary potatoes assaulted her with welcoming comfort. Perhaps she could get through this. Perhaps it wouldn't be a complete disaster. But, as everyone dug in, Professor Sprout spoke up wiping away her last hopes that this would be an uneventful meal. Yet, with Sprout's conversation starter, sitting next to the man that was the source of her increasingly lustful thoughts seemed to be the least of her worries.

"So, Hermione, I hear you apprenticed with Master Roberto Perugino, for your Charms Mistress certificate?" the slightly grubby witch asked, while waggling her eyebrows at Professor Flitwick.

"Well, yes, I did..." Hermione began to reply.

"I saw your research published in Wizarding Astronomy Today a few months ago," Professor Flitwick's squeaky voice interjected as he looked pointedly at Professor Sinistra.

"Oh, you did?" Hermione replied. "And, what did you...."

Before Hermione could complete her sentence, Sinistra interrupted while staring directly at Professor Vector.

"Interesting. That research also seemed to rely heavily on Arithmancy and only minutely on Astronomy."

"Well, actually, it..." Hermione tried again.

"Well, obviously Arithmancy is one of the girl's hobbies," Vector broke in vehemently, "but really her true talent has always been Potions. You are now a certified Potions Mistress aren't you, Hermione?"

All eyes were now riveted on Hermione, except for Severus, who instead stabbed savagely at a piece of chicken as if the poor bird had done him some grave injustice. Hermione turned to look at Minerva, only to see her smile knowingly and then become engrossed with her goblet of pumpkin juice. The silence that filled the Great Hall was deafening.

Hermione looked confusedly around the table at her staring peers and wondered, What in the Wizarding World has gotten into these people?!

Professor Sprout spoke suddenly, "Oh, come on, Hermione, who's getting sacked?"

"Pardon?" Hermione questioned.

"Don't be coy, child," Professor Sinistra said. "Just tell us which one of us you're replacing."

"Sybil's been predicting it was each of us, in turn," Professor Flitwick said.

"Not me," Professor Sprout smiled.

"Well, it seems my inner eye has always been a bit distorted when it comes to Miss Granger," Professor Trelawney's overly misty voice replied defensively. "The girl has always lacked the vision for Divination, and apparently her aura has affected mine!"

A few of the teachers snickered quietly, but all remained intently focused on Hermione.

"Minerva," Hermione began after swallowing a nervous lump in her throat, "haven't you told them about my position?"

Minerva's eyes twinkled with an intensity befitting her predecessor. "Well, it seemed that everyone believed that Sybil had it all figured out, why should I burst their bubble?"

"Oh, Minerva!" Hermione laughed. Now she understood their reaction. They all thought that she had been hired to replace one of them! "No," she addressed the other teachers, "it is not my intention to replace any of you! Instead, I'll be teaching a new interdisciplinary class to the top sixth and seventh year students."

"And, in her spare time, she'll be working on research that the school is funding," Minerva added proudly.

Hermione could hear the audible sigh of relief from many of the teachers now that the threat of losing their jobs was over. She noticed, however, that the Potions Master sitting next to her seemed to be utterly unaffected, as if Hermione didn't even exist. This disturbed her more than if he had sneered at her, as if he would ever be worried that some young, upstart, slip of a girl like her could ever take his place. And the momentary distraction of the strange behavior from her fellow teachers was gone.

In its place was an acute awareness of the maleness of the man sitting next to her. The conversation continued on around the pair, with Hermione, making short responses when absolutely necessary, but her true attention was on the source of heat she felt radiating towards her from her right. The table was small for such a large group, and Hermione concentrated on not accidentally elbowing the man anytime she went to take a bite. That was the easy part since it seemed her appetite had completely left her. The hard part was not succumbing to the urge to simply shove him and his chair away from the table, pounce on his lap, and snog the daylights out of him.

The smell of him was driving her insane. Every so often the aroma of chicken and rosemary was upstaged by something so masculine that it took all of Hermione's will power to not bury her nose in the nape of his neck. Just as she was about to put label to the scent, it was gone. Elusive, frustrating, but so Merlin-be-damned enticing, she would sit sniffing the air desperately, just hoping to catch a hint of it again.

This is ridiculous! Hermione thought. I'm a grown woman; he's a grown man. Sure, we're colleagues, but there are no policies against fraternization amongst the staff, if so Dumbledore and McGonagall would've been tossed out of Hogwarts decades ago. I've got to do something.

You can do this, Granger. You faced down the Dark Lord with Harry and Ron when you were only eighteen, for goodness sake! You're a Gryffindor. Come on!

"So, Professor Snape," there, nice and polite, "I'm sure you're glad to hear I wasn't after your job," Hermione joked lightly.

Very slowly, Severus Snape set his fork down, turned, and narrowed his eyes.

In a voice bordering a growl he replied, "And what exactly would make you think that that was ever a concern of mine? You may have been teacher's pet as a student here, Miss Granger, but you'll find that my tenure and skill go far beyond burying your nose in books and a scant number of years as someone's apprentice."

"Well... I... you..." Hermione sputtered, unable to think of a coherent reply.

"The ever-eloquent Miss Granger, at a loss for words. Hades must be freezing over as we speak," he mocked. "Why ever didn't I enjoy this rare blessing whilst I had to suffer you as a student?"

Hermione's blood was boiling. How dare he be so rude to her! She was just making conversation! If he thought his intimidation act was going to work on her, he was sorely mistaken! Her face began to purple in anger as she spoke in barely controlled measures, "I was merely making polite dinner conversation, which you seem unable to accomplish, other than the monosyllabic responses you've occasionally uttered this evening!"

Hermione barely recognized the sound of scraping chairs, being pushed away from the table through the ringing in her ears, as a few of her dinner companions decided it was time for their meal to come to an end.

"Perhaps," he snarled, "it is the person initiating the conversation that has me retreating to the most basic of replies, in order to minimize the conversation as much as possible!"

Somewhere in the distance, Hermione heard Professor Flitwick's tiny voice, "Yes, well, I believe I've had enough cake. Watching the figure and all. If you will excuse me...."

"The person initiating the conversation?!" Hermione shrieked.

"Yes, yes. I have to go and polish my crystal balls, they're getting a bit dusty I believe," Professor Trelawney's voice murmured as she stood to leave.

"If you didn't notice, Professor," Hermione continued, "I was the only one who had the decency to engage you in any conversation at all."

"I think I'll help you with those, Sybill," Professor Sinistra chimed in as she too left the table.

"That's because they have more common sense than some know-it-all school girl," Severus mocked.

"My, my, look at the time, come on, Minerva, you were going to show me that new powder room you found up on the third floor," Professor Sprout said as she grabbed Minerva by the sleeve of her robe and pulled her out of the room.

"Oh, I suppose in your twisted world polite dinner conversation is tantamount to torture by Cruciatus!!" Hermione sneered.

"It appears that your polite dinner conversation has now sent everyone off to bed!" Severus smirked.

Hermione looked around the Great Hall. It was completely empty other than the two of them.

"This has nothing to do with me! I wasn't the one being so rude! This is all your fault!" And with that Hermione reached over and grabbed a large frosting-coated, chunk of cake off her plate.

"You... wouldn't... dare," Severus said in slow, measured tones. "Even your foolish Gryffindor brashness wouldn't..."

Hermione never found out what her brashness wouldn't do as she threw the cake in Severus' face. For one glorious moment, it hung there, affixed to his over-large nose with frosting, and then with a soft plop! it fell down his chest and into his lap.

Immediately Hermione was on her feet and began wiping at Severus' shirt. "Oh, I'm so sorry! I don't know what came over me!" she said as she managed to smear the chocolate into the linen of his shirt, making it a larger mess.

Giving the shirt up as a bad job, Hermione reached down and plucked the chunk of cake off of his lap, and then began to rub the frosting off of his pants with her napkin.

Three things happened almost simultaneously. Hermione saw Severus pull his wand from his sleeve. Hermione's eyes never left the wand Severus pulled out of his sleeve, but her hands grew hot as she felt him grow rigid beneath her touch. She then feared that he was now going to hex her sideways for that Gryffindor brashness he so obviously detested.

"Evanesco!" he murmured with a sharp flick of his wand, and all evidence of the cake was gone from his person. In one swift motion he was out of his chair, pushed Hermione aside, and was halfway across the room, with a muttered, "Good night, Miss Granger." Before Hermione even had a chance to respond, he was gone.

Hermione stood, shell-shocked for a moment, while the events of the last few moments soaked in. She had argued with Severus in front of everyone – yelled at him, in fact! She had then gone as far as throwing cake in his face! And, of all the strange twists, he had been aroused! There was no denying that!

Hermione headed towards her quarters, with one thought on her mind, I need a plan.

If only there was a book ... 101 Ways to Handle Snarky Men – perhaps I could do a bit of research with this particular snarky man and write one!

A laugh escaped her at the thought, just as she turned a corner and came face-to-face with Professor McGonagall.

"Ah, there you are, my dear!" Minerva smiled. "I was just heading back down to the Great Hall to make certain you were all right."

Hermione returned the smile, pleased that she wasn't going to be chastised for making such a scene, "Yes, I'm fine, thank you."

"You know," Minerva twinkled at her – Merlin, do ALL Headmasters/mistresses twinkle? Hermione thought – "I've set your lab up in the Dungeons. I'm sure you'll want to be close to the school cupboards, as well as the stores off limits to the students."

"Oh, well, yes, I suppose that will be handy," Hermione acknowledged.

"And, I thought that perhaps Severus would enjoy learning of your research," Minerva winked.

Oh, subtle, Minerva, subtle, Hermione thought, but only gave Minerva a non-committal, "Perhaps."

With a "Good evening" the two witches parted and Hermione continued her way back to her quarters. Once inside, Hermione did what she did best ... she made a list. She took a seat at the desk in her office and getting out a parchment and quill, Hermione wrote:

Methods for Getting Severus' Attention:

ii. Cons – Will take more time and planning than 1 or 2

Hermione nibbled on the tip of the quill, mulling the three choices over. After a few minutes it became clear, there was only one way to go. She made a large circle around her choice, and headed off to bed.