Three

Thank you for all your lovely comments on this story. I hope you will continue to enjoy it!

This story was written for stgulik, the best beta/editor a person could pray for. Sh is such an inspirational, supportive force in my life. It is a joy every moment we have working together.

They celebrated Hermione's first cancer-free year with a party, and such was his joy at her recovery that Severus indulged her every whim, including the guest list, even though it contained every Weasley alive. Most of the time Severus could barely tolerate being in the same room with the dozy lot, but he suffered their boisterous Gryffindor silliness because it pleased Hermione to be surrounded by her friends and family.

He stood proudly by her side as they received their guests. She wore a set of dress robes in a deep Slytherin green, which brought out the burnished colour of her newly-regrown hair. She looked so beautiful, her face glowing with renewed health, her eyes warm and inviting as her gaze caught his throughout the evening.

Severus watched in silence as the various Weasley family members, along with other school friends and work colleagues, gobbled up the catered canapés and Honeydukes chocolates and quaffed down butterbeer, firewhisky and wine. He counted the hours until it was time for them to leave.

Their cheery avoidance of the subject of Hermione's health scare puzzled and offended Severus. It was all he could do not to shout, "Why are you standing around stuffing yourselves when you should be appreciating her? Don't you understand how close I came to losing that beautiful witch in the green robes? You're all but ignoring her! You should be showering her with attention!"

But he bit back his tirade with supreme effort, and concentrated on nursing his firewhisky instead. Only in two other faces could he see his own joy and relief mirrored: Harry Potter's and Remus Lupin's. Remus caught his eye at several points in the evening, and silently raised his glass toward Hermione, a look of fond satisfaction upon his careworn face. Severus nodded his thanks...at least someone understood how precious she was.

Severus could not recall exactly when Lupin became 'Remus' in his mind. The man had always called him by his Christian name, even before Severus gave him tacit permission. In the aftermath of Harry Potter's generous gift to save Hermione's life, Remus had become a boon. Severus had initially treated his presence with uncomfortable silence; as the days passed, he no longer had the energy to devote to being aloof. Even more than Potter, Remus had devoted every moment of his spare time so that Severus could catch a few hours sleep here and there, or work to fulfill Potions orders and keep their business alive. Remus helped chop ingredients and make deliveries. He made sure the pantry had food, he paid bills and kept the house tidy.

Then came the horrible day Hermione suffered a terrible reaction to her treatments. Her fever raged so high for so long they were afraid they might lose her. As mediwitches and Healers rushed in and out of her room, refusing to allow Severus to sit with her, Remus stayed with Severus. For two straight days and nights, he never left his side. When the fever finally broke, and Hermione was pronounced out of the woods and sleeping peacefully, Severus, to his later chagrin, broke down and wept in front of the other man. To his surprise, Remus put his arm around him.

Shamed, he pushed away, sobbing, "I don't require your pity, wolf! Leave me, please."

Remus released him, but remained by his side. "I can't do that, Severus."

"Why are you doing this? Why are you here?" he sobbed, hating his tendency to cry when overwrought. "Come to have a laugh at poor Snivellus?"

"Severus, please!" Remus entreated, his voice strangely harsh. He put his hand on Severus' arm. "I never felt that way about you...you know that!"

Severus shook off the comforting arm. "I can't lose her, Remus! It will kill me!"

Remus allowed Severus' shattered nerves to calm, and pressed a handkerchief into his fumbling hands. As he blew his nose, Remus said quietly, "I know we've had our differences. But for Hermione's sake, we don't have time for them anymore, Severus. I have always respected you; I have always adored Hermione." He tried to smile. "I'm not leaving you two in the lurch."

Remus had sat quietly with Severus until his relief and anguish was finally spent, and even in his hysteria Severus had been grateful that Remus had not done any of that woolly Gryffindor, 'why don't you talk about your feelings' bollocks. His placid silence had been admittedly comforting in those darkest of hours.

On the nights they allowed Severus to stay, he slept with Hermione, tucking her frail little body in his arms in her cramped hospital bed. Many was the night he would wake to see Remus nodding in the uncomfortable chair in the corner. There were other times when Severus would return from working or grabbing a shower and hear his wife's soft laughter, and Remus' answering chuckle, within her hospital room.

As Hermione grimly and belligerently fought both her illness and the treatments through its last and toughest stage, Remus made sure Severus ate and slept adequately. When asked how he could be repaid, he merely said, "Get well. Stay healthy. Take care of one another."

Severus found it puzzling, but he was too occupied with just getting through each day to ponder the man's behaviour at any great length.

-o0o-

Once, near the end of Hermione's treatments, returning from a long night of brewing, Severus heard the unmistakable sound of her crying as he reached her hospital room door. Alarmed, Severus nearly called for the mediwitch, but froze at her words.

"I can't help it, Remus! I'm so worried about him. He looked so dreadfully tired today. The poor man pushes himself too hard." She sniffed woefully...it was a sound that nearly drove Severus to his knees.

Remus' voice was reassuring. "I know, Hermione. But you have to understand, it's his way of coping. If he can't be with you, he needs to keep himself busy. His only thoughts are for you to get well. He loves you very much. But he is getting more rest; I'm making sure of that."

"Thank you, Remus. I don't feel so guilty, knowing you're helping out."

"I'm thrilled that he'd allow me to help at all. You know how stubborn he is."

Severus felt a frisson of irritation build in his chest, until he heard the warmth and smile in his wife's voice. "Yeah, maybe, but you can't deny he's wonderful, isn't he? So strong and good. But he's been through so much. People don't appreciate him like they should, you know." She was crying again.

"Hermione, darling, please don't distress yourself. Severus has never cared about any of that. You are all he cares about."

Hermione was quiet for a few moments, and when she did speak, Severus had to strain to hear.

"Remus, promise me something."

"Anything, dear."

There was the slightest of hesitations. "Promise me that, if things... don't go well, and he has to make some hard decisions..."

Remus' voice was quiet, but strong. "He won't make them alone, Hermione. I promise you that."

"It's just that Severus has had to bear so much on his own..."

"He won't be alone in this."

"Thank you. That...that helps. Oh, Remus, what a blessing you've been to both of us during all this. I don't know how to thank you."

Remus' voice was warm and loving. "Don't be silly. Now, why don't you rest a little, so that when Severus comes, you can have a good long visit with him? Now, no more tears, dear. You don't want him to see you've been crying, do you?"

Severus had stood at the door, shaken to his foundations. It had taken almost five minutes before he could compose himself enough to announce his presence.

Remus had not tried to placate Hermione with empty assurances that all would be well, or chastise her that she was being fatalistic, on insist that she shouldn't talk that way. He had been as pragmatic and as grounded as Hermione about it. How strange, Severus thought, that this should comfort him so.

Two days later, Harry Potter had spelled Remus as he suffered through the full moon. Severus brewed his Wolfsbane, but he still hid himself away as a precautionary measure. As Severus and Potter sat through a rather strained and sticky weekend, Severus realised that he missed Remus' quiet, mild presence. When he returned, looking tired and listless from his transformation, Severus made him a strengthening tonic and watched over him as Remus slept off the worst of the monthly change.

-o0o-

"She looks wonderful tonight," said a voice to his right. Severus turned to see Remus smiling at him. He indicated Hermione with a nod. She was laughing at some comment of Ginevra Potter's, and Severus' heart lifted at the sound of her mirth.

Remus' eyes followed Severus' to watch Hermione and her school chum giggling together like third-years again. "I always had a soft spot for her, even as my student. She was so smart, and eager to learn. A teacher's dream pupil."

Severus snorted, remembering his own view of the younger version of his wife. He had thought her insufferable and a complete pain in the arse, mainly because she so often reminded him of himself at her age. "Thank you for reminding me," he replied dryly, and to his surprise, Remus laughed.

"You don't fool me a bit, Severus." His expression softened. "I'm so happy for you both. It's truly gratifying to see you happily married, and Hermione looking like her old, delightful self again."

Severus nodded shortly. "I am pleased," he said, not trusting his voice to carry the sentiment further.

The two men stood side by side, looking out at the horde of invading redheads and their spouses. "It's a lovely party."

Severus shrugged noncommittally, feeling awkward as always at these functions. "Thank you for coming."

"I wouldn't have missed it," Remus laughed. "Hermione ordered me to keep you company while she did the mingling. She didn't want you to disappear into your study until everyone left."

Severus' expression must have reflected his disappointment. He'd been planning to do just that. He should have known Hermione would be on the lookout for it and send her lapdog to intercept him. Remus added smugly, "Quite a woman, your Hermione. Always looking out for her wizard."

Just then, Hermione looked up from exclaiming over Bill and Fleur Weasley's newest child, and caught Severus' eye. The love on her face staggered Severus, and suddenly with all his heart he wished they could have a child. He wanted to hold his first born and whisper to it all the things he loved about its mother.

Turning away to do battle with his thoughts, he caught Remus' expression out of the corner of his eye. He, too, was watching the young parents with their newborn, and his expression was so melancholy Severus felt a reluctant trace of pity well in his breast. Remus noticed Severus' keen look, and cleared his throat, pulling on his nose.

The two men stood in excruciating silence for almost two minutes, until Severus asked, "Do you miss them?"

Remus shot him a puzzled look. "Dora and Teddy? Of course," he said evenly, looking back toward Bill and Fleur. His face was curiously unreadable. "It's strange, when I think back about it. Shortly after the war, when things settled down, we drifted apart so gradually I didn't actually notice it. Suddenly, it just seemed harder to find things to talk about.

"I'm not saying I'm blameless in this," he added quickly, as if he suspected Severus of somehow accusing him. "I had tried for so long to discourage our relationship. What did someone like me have to offer someone like her?"

Severus swallowed, remembering the battle he'd waged with his own sense of self-worth about Hermione. Strange that, after all these years, he could empathise with Remus Lupin.

Remus continued. "When Dora got pregnant with Teddy, I wasn't happy, but toward the end of the war, I had grown to realise how much she meant to me. But by then, perhaps it was too little too late. Neither of us truly expected to survive, and when we did..."

Severus nodded. "You hadn't planned that far. I know."

Remus' eyes widened, then he nodded. "Yes, I suppose you do." He shrugged. "After that, things started on a downward spiral. Losing her father hit her hard. She no longer took any interest in being an Auror.

"I think the first real sign that something was wrong happened during the Order of Merlin ceremony. She got so agitated when they mentioned Mad-Eye. They'd been good friends, and his death had really rocked her as well. She became overly emotional. I put it down to battle fatigue. You know how we all were at the time, just trying to find a little equilibrium. A few days later, when some people recognised her from her photo in the papers, she got quite upset and lost her temper. She tried to hex some poor man who merely asked for her autograph! I couldn't understand it."

He shrugged, and a ghost of a smile touched his lips. "You know Nymphadora...she loved being in the thick of it, showing off that outrageous hair of hers." He sobered. "Suddenly she didn't want to go outside. She became paranoid that Teddy might be in danger. She grew depressed. I wasn't prepared to deal with it...Merlin, what wizard really is?"

He shrugged, and Severus nodded, understanding. As much as he adored his wife, there were moments during her monthly cycle when she exhibited behaviour that baffled him completely. He found the best method was to simply ride it out and work on restocking the St Mungo's orders until the storm blew over. It never lasted long...he had long ago learned to take it in stride, just as they did with everything about their marriage.

"One afternoon I came back from the Ministry and she was waiting for me at the door. Her bags were packed, and she told me she was leaving. Said she needed some space and time," Remus continued, looking lost and hurt. Severus could hear the frustration in his voice. "No discussion, no plan. She just left. Andromeda urged me to give her a little time, but..." he sighed and looked down at his empty glass. "At the time, I thought it was the right thing to do to let them go, that perhaps they would be better off without me. It didn't occur to me how much worse off I'd be without them."