Everybody’s Fool

More lies about a world

You know you've got everybody fooled.

~ "Everybody's Fool" by Evanescence

Attempting to balance my teaching duties and my extracurricular research had proven more difficult than I'd ever imagined. I hate falling behind when it comes to anything, especially my job. I vowed to leave the journal alone for at least a day in an effort to get myself caught back up. When I should have been taking lunch in the Great Hall, I sat sequestered in my office marking the essays turned in by my sixth years.

I read sheet after sheet of parchment on the use, ingredients, and effect of the Draught of Living Death. While reading I became even more convinced that the Draught must have been a part of Severus' potion.

I groaned loudly when I realized exactly what I had just thought.

"Good grief, now I'm on a first name basis with the man..."

I put my quill down, placed my elbows on the desk and dropped my head into my hands.

I can't stop thinking about him. Reading his most intimate thoughts and feelings is completely wreaking havoc on my deductive reasoning skills. I'm a logical person, but right now I can't separate my heart from my head. Maybe I need to talk to someone about it... It may help me regain some perspective if I have someone to bounce ideas off of...

Then I remembered I would be having dinner with Harry later that night.

They may not have had the best relationship while we were in school, but I honestly think Harry was truly repulsed by how he had treated Professor Snape after he had learned the truth. Maybe I won't tell him about the journal right away...

I finished grading the few parchments I had left and headed back to my classroom. Fourth year Gryffindors and Slytherins would be waiting for me.

Friday afternoon's double Potions lesson for the fourth years featured the Wit-Sharpening Potion. After the students had settled, I turned to write the ingredients for the potion on the blackboard.

"Good afternoon, class," I said, turning to face them. "Today we'll be working on the Wit-Sharpening Potion. I trust that you have all completed your assigned reading on this potion and should be able to begin brewing efficiently. If you have any questions, please raise your hand."

I stood at the front of the room and watched as the students took out their cauldrons and gathered ingredients. I catalogued the facial expressions of certain students. Some gave me the impression that they were perfectly content with the assignment, others I knew I had to keep an eye on.

Once everyone began crushing their scarab beetles, I began prowling the room. My thoughts were lazily switching between the potion being created and the problem of Professor Snape.

There isn't a lot of information regarding prolonged use of this potion. I wonder what the side effects would be...

I stopped to assist Mr. Bodine with the cutting of his ginger root. After demonstrating that the root should be evenly cut and not mangled, I continued to circle the room.

When I began pondering my Professor Snape problem again, an idea struck me. I really wish I knew which book I had been dreaming about! If only I could remember... Maybe this potion could help me with my nightmare problem. If I were thinking more clearly, I...

I snapped out of my inner musings when I heard a screech from the back of the classroom. My eyes focused on the offending cauldron. I quickly drew my wand and called out, "Protego." The dark green contents began bubbling up and out of the cauldron, and I feared eminent explosion.

"Everyone, out in the hall. Now!" I called out.

I rushed to the bench and extinguished the flame – and waited. Luckily, the mixture didn't explode, but it did create a sticky glop on the table top. I examined the ingredients Mr. O'Brien had scattered around his cauldron and deduced what the problem was.

After making sure the cauldron's contents were stable, I let the students back in. As they filed into the room, I gave my next set of instructions.

"I'd like everyone to go to Mr. O'Brien's station and determine what caused the problem we just witnessed."

The students huddled around the bench and looked at the evidence. I stood nearby, arms crossed, listening to some quiet speculation, and after a few moments, a Slytherin girl raised her hand.

"Yes, Miss Lindross?"

"I know what happened, Professor."

"Go ahead, then."

"Well, it appears as though all the potion's ingredients have been used. But by the color of the cauldron's contents I've determined that too much armadillo bile was added to the brew. Then possibly stirred too quickly, which caused it to bubble up so violently."

"Very good, Miss Lindross; ten points to Slytherin. You may all return to your seats and continue working." Then I directed my attention to O'Brien. "Mr. O'Brien, please clean up this mess," I said while pointing to his work area.

When the bell was about to ring, I called out to the class, "Two feet of parchment on the correct brewing procedure for the Wit-Sharpening Potion, due on Tuesday."

I had to smirk as I watched Mr. O'Brien's friends smack him upside his head as they were exiting. They knew the only reason they had homework over the weekend was because of their friend's brewing mishap.

At precisely six-thirty, I opened the door to the Three Broomsticks. Due to his flailing arms, I managed to spot Harry, seated in a far corner. I made my way across the crowded pub to him. Finally, I stood at Harry's side and was enfolded in his embrace. After he released me, I removed my travelling cloak and took the seat across from him.

"It's so nice to see you, Hermione! It feels like I haven't seen you in years!" Harry said excitedly as I reached for the butterbeer he had waiting for me on the table.

"Harry!" I chided. "You just got to see me over the summer."

"Well, yeah, but still... So how's everything at Hogwarts?"

"The same as when we were students, honestly. There are rivalries and troublemakers. Friends, lovers and enemies... I'm enjoying teaching more than I thought I would though," I answered conversationally.

"I always thought you'd make a great teacher, Hermione. I was just surprised you wanted Potions to be your course of study. If anything I thought you'd want to take up Arithmancy or Transfiguration."

I sighed heavily. "You know I had my reasons, Harry. We were all looking for something when the war ended. This was just what I needed, especially looking at it now..."

I trailed off, and Harry gave me a strange look. Before he could ask me what I meant, I asked him a question of my own.

"So, why are we here? Besides the obvious of course?" I said as I reached for my drink once more.

Harry smiled at me and then launched into his explanation.

"Well, we've all been talking. We as in Ron, Ginny, Neville, and I, and we've decided we'd like to throw you a birthday party! It's been so long since you've been home for your birthday, and we want to celebrate! But we didn't want to plan a surprise party because we didn't know what your schedule was like..."

"Oh, well, sure! I guess... It's on a Sunday this year, so as long as it isn't too late. I'm only saying this because I have to get up fairly early, but it's nice of you to think about me. With everything that's been going on, I actually forgot about it..."

"About that," Harry said, curiosity lacing his tone. "What's really going on? I can tell you've got a problem you're trying to figure out."

That was my opening. Here's my chance, I thought.

I discreetly cast Muffliato, then interlocked my hands and placed them on the table top. I looked into the bright green eyes of my friend, took a deep breath and quickly said, "Harry, what if Professor Snape is still alive?"

Harry stared at me, opening and closing his mouth a few times. Every time he appeared to be ready to voice his thoughts he'd close his mouth again. I could tell he wasn't pleased with my choice of topic, but he was trying very hard not to snap at me.

"Hermione," he said quietly. "I think you should ask Professor McGonagall for new quarters when you get back to the school..."

"Harry! I'm serious. I really think he could still be alive."

"You know I love you like a sister, right? But I just don't see it as being possible."

"Well, you know he was bloody brilliant. Plus, with being a Death Eater and all it must have made him paranoid. Wouldn't he have prepared for something like that to happen to him?"

"You know we've talked about this." He was starting to get irritated, but I had to try to get him to listen.

"Harry, please..."

He reached across the table to cover my folded hands with his own.

"I know you feel guilty, Hermione. I do too. Every day I end up thinking about him. You know I've tried to get answers. I've tracked down and questioned as many Death Eaters as I could get my hands on. I've looked for a reason. Now, the only plausible excuse I have is that the only Death Eater that I could never find has Professor Snape's body, or at least knows what happened to it."

"Who?"

"Rodolphus Lestrange. The department kept it quiet; we didn't need the public going crazy."

"So, Bella's crazy husband is still running around out there... wonderful," I said sarcastically.

"Listen, this is besides the point. I'm worried about you. I know you don't get out much anymore... and well... It looks like Potions has become your life just as it was his."

"It's not! I... see people!" I sputtered.

"I have to hunt you down to spend time with you. That's why I'm always so happy when I do get to see you. You're sleeping in his old rooms, teaching his old class, and now you're convinced... again... that he's still alive."

"It's not guilt, Harry! I... I think I..."

"Hermione, you know I named one of my kids after him. I know all about what you're going through. Like I said, maybe ask for new quarters; it might help you clear your head."

I nodded sadly. I had hoped that Harry would really listen this time, as it had been so long since we visited the subject after the war. Unfortunately, I had been proven wrong.

"Thanks for the advice, Harry. I'll think it over..."

We made small talk for the rest of the evening, but my mind was in even more turmoil when I left than it had been when I arrived.

I slowly walked into my quarters, aggravated and simply depressed.

"I can't believe him..." I groaned as I put the kettle on. "He made me sound unhinged in just a few sentences... I know they didn't understand me going to Germany, but I did! And I'm not a recluse... I'm a teacher for Merlin's sake! Bloody hell."

While my tea was steeping, I stalked off to my office. I snatched up one of the viable Wit-Sharpening Potion samples submitted by my fourth years and returned to my quarters.

I sat in front of the hearth, drinking my tea and tried to clear my head. By the time I emptied my cup, I was ready for my experiment.

It's a little early, for bed... but hopefully I'll have a more productive sleep than I've had evening...I mused as I turned the sheets down and snuggled into bed.

After getting sufficiently comfortable, I uncorked the vial and drank the potion.

"Nox."

A/N: Hello there, readers! I know my author notes up until now have been very generic and full of love and thank yous, but this chapter needs to have something addressed. During the SS/HG exchange, many readers expressed concern over Hermione drinking a student potion.

Hermione grabs a viable, previously made potion to use for her experiment. In my mind while writing this scene, she used what was at her disposal without having to either make it herself, or be asked too many questions by other people.

In my heart, I feel as though no matter how obsessed she may be, she would never put herself at risk by drinking a potion that she thought would not be capable of achieving the desired results. She's focused on her task, not completely out of her mind.

I just wanted to make sure that you know I considered the situation and still feel as though she's intelligent, but also resourceful.

/explanation

Much love to Clairvoyant, Isalie964 & JessiKitty for alpha reading.

Hearts, flowers, cheese and chocolate to karelia for beta reading this for me. Without her extreme patience and support, who knows how long it would have taken for this fic to actually be presentable.

I'd also like to extend special thanks to ApollinaV and dressagegrrrl for pointing out the inconsistencies that existed in the original version of this chapter.

Thank you to everyone who is continuing to read and review this story. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask!

Much Love,

~ Brena